He was wrestling with his attacker, who had disarmed him. She rushed to him and sank into her stance. Sean pinned the man’s arms and Fi landed a solid kick to his kidney. He groaned and sank to his knees. Sean circled in front of him and started to wind up for a punch, when Fi spotted a blade in the man’s right hand. She drew her gun and fired, and the man crumpled. Fi heard a scream and her head swung around just as Asher dispatched the third man, his blade gleaming as it slid from his assailant’s body.
“Fuck!” Sara’s attacker roared as her dagger bit into his thigh. He whirled to face her, his knife shaking in his right fist. “I’m not even going to bother to take you,” he seethed, limping. “I’ll enjoy killing you so…much…more.”
Fi started forward, but it was too late. Sara’s eyes narrowed to slits as she made her move, one Asher had taught her just weeks ago. It was a deadly feint, a kill stroke. She lunged forward with a right thrust, purposefully leaving her left side open. The man swung for her left side, and in an instant Sara wrapped his right arm with her left, trapping him against her chest and squeezing like a vise. Even in the darkness, Fi could see the fear in the man’s eyes as he struggled to free himself.
“Tell me why you deserve to live,” Sara growled through locked teeth.
“Sara,” Fi choked, but Sara didn’t seem to hear her.
“Tell me one good reason,” Sara repeated, “and I’ll let you live.”
Snarling, the man spat on her. “Fuck you.”
Sara’s right dagger thrust deep into his abdomen, and the man screamed. “You kiss your mother with that filthy mouth?”
Sara ripped the blade upward, and the man’s screams changed to a choking gurgle as it slid beneath his ribs into his heart. He crumpled beneath her in a gutted, bloody heap. Fi’s heart stopped cold as she watched her friend’s right hand fall to her side, soaked to the elbow with blood. Sara straddled the dead man’s body and stared down at him in the darkness.
---------- Sean ---------
Ice. Sean had turned to ice. His mind screamed for oxygen, but he couldn’t draw breath as he stared at his gasping girlfriend. Sara looked up. When her eyes met his, she started to shake. The daggers fell from her hands, clattering onto the body beneath her...the body she’d created.
“Sean?”
Tears filled her eyes. In two bounds he was with her, his arms embracing her while she sobbed. She was shaking so hard that it was a struggle to hold her up. He felt her legs weaken, and he tightened his grip. He held her head on his shoulder and stroked her hair, shushing her.
“I’m so sorry, Sean. Please forgive me. He was going to kill you, he…he…” Her eyes grew wild, darting everywhere at once.
“Sara.” He took her face in his hands, trying to call her back to him. “Sara!” She startled and met his eyes, her face crumpling anew. “Breathe,” he commanded.
He locked his arms around her like a vise, forcing her shaking to stop. She nodded and started to gulp in deep breaths, her tears slowing. Though Sean felt Fi and Asher staring at them in shock, he ignored them. No, it was more than that. He couldn’t have turned away from Sara if someone had stabbed him from behind. The only thing in the entire world was her.
“Sara, there’s nothing to forgive.” He pressed his forehead to hers. “You saved my life.”
He searched Sara’s tearful face and then suddenly, he couldn’t help himself…he pressed his lips to hers. She grabbed him with her bloodied hands and kissed him back desperately, tears still sliding down her cheeks. Sean felt his pounding heart change from fear to relief as he crushed her to him so hard that her wet cheeks pressed to his. She was ok. She was alive. And so was he.
When they finally broke camp later that afternoon, the mood was somber. At least, Sean’s mood was somber.
“Asher,” Sean began, and then pressed his lips together.
The girls walked ahead in the distance. It was the perfect time to talk…if he could just make himself speak. Asher walked beside him in silence, waiting patiently. As usual, Sean thought, with a slight twinge of annoyance. Asher was always patient. Oh well, at least now it was more like being annoyed with a brother than with a rival.
“I have to talk to you about something,” he began again, and Asher nodded.
“Sure, Sean. You know you can always talk to me.”
Sean gave an appreciative nod. He hated to admit it, but having someone else who understood him that wasn’t a girl was sometimes nice.
“I just…I don’t know how to help Sara.” He shook his head. “I don’t even know how to handle…” his voice trailed off as he stopped again, stuck. He wasn’t even sure how to put what he was feeling into words.
“It seems like you know just how to help Sara to me,” Asher offered kindly, and Sean’s chest tightened.
“That’s not what I meant.” Sean struggled to explain. “I just don’t understand. I don’t understand how she could do that, I mean.”
“Ah,” Asher’s voice grew sad. “You mean how she could kill someone…up close like that.” He sighed. “Yes, I guess I’d be the authority on that.”
Sean suddenly felt guilty for even asking. “I’m sorry Asher,” he said, and Asher stopped him with a wave of his hand.
“It’s ok, Sean. I get it. It was one thing to see Fi shoot people. But what Sara did…”
He didn’t finish his thought. He didn’t have to. They walked in silence for a few minutes.
“I’m sure Fi told you about her cousin, Layla,” Sean finally said.
“Yes, she just told me, you know…after.”
Sean nodded. “So I get it, I do. It makes total sense. She’s all torn up, and that anger has nowhere to go, but I still worry that she’s killing herself more than anything else.”
There, Sean thought. That was exactly it. Maybe Fi was just better at covering her feelings, but with Sara, it had felt like she was the one dying in front of him, not her victim.
“Maybe it’s better that she has an outlet,” Asher said, and Sean made a face.
“Asher, she eviscerated a grown man like it was nothing. I’d say that’s more than an outlet.” The moment he said it, Sean clamped his mouth shut. He hadn’t meant for it to come out like that, like he was judging her. For Christ’s sakes, she’d saved his life. “I just can’t believe I have to watch this happen again, and this time it’s even worse.”
It was true. He knew it as he said it. He was kind of over watching the women he loved turn into killers. Even when it was for all the right reasons. Asher walked in silence for a moment and Sean realized that his “judgment” applied to Asher as well.
“Shit, I’m sorry Asher.” He ran his hand through his hair in frustration. It was getting too long, he noted with irritation as he shoved it behind his ear.
“It’s ok, Sean. I know what you mean. You mean that it killed you to watch this happen to Fi, and now it’s happening to Sara too. I can’t really imagine what that must be like.”
Sean was startled. He’d never thought about it before, but Asher hadn’t had to deal with that at all. The first time he’d met Fi, she’d had a gun pointed straight at his head. He’d never known who she was before she became the warrior. And Sara wasn’t his girl. Sean hung his head and exhaled.
When Fi had shot and killed someone for the first time, it had changed her forever. Even though she’d saved the rapist’s victim and her family. Even though the guy had totally deserved it. And Sean had to watch it. He had to watch something inside of his best friend break forever. And it nearly killed him. But Sara was worse. So much worse.
“So then you have to tell me, Asher,” Sean whispered. “How do you do it?” Despite feeling like an idiot, a shudder ran through him as he replayed Sara gutting that man over and over again in his mind. Once she’d made her decision, he thought, she hadn’t even hesitated.
“You mean how do I look someone in the eye while I run a sword through his chest?” Asher’s voice was tight.
Sean felt his stomach turn. He h
ated this. But he had to know. He nodded.
Asher’s eyes glinted as he stared at the girls striding ahead of them in the distance. By now, they were laughing and chatting as if they hadn’t a care in the world. Yet one wore a gun and a buck knife, and the other wore daggers…and both were deadly.
“I’ll tell you how I do it, Sean.” Asher’s voice turned to stone. “I think about what would happen to Fi if I didn’t.”
A Rising Threat
Voices
----------- Fi ----------
Fi jumped as the lightening cracked and thunder roared simultaneously overhead. “Sheesh, it’s good thing we found this place,” she said.
She snuggled against Asher on the lumpy brown couch in the finished basement they’d found just before the heavens opened. These days the old rules about staying away from houses mattered much less, and they were cautious enough to scout it first. Somehow Sara and Sean had both managed to fit onto a single large beanbag, though the trickle of white Styrofoam at the seams implied that the bag might not survive the strain. As usual, they were lost in their number games.
“Ten million, one hundred eleven,” Sara murmured, and dissolved into giggles as Sean swatted at her.
“Show off,” he complained. He spluttered when the pillow Fi tossed at them hit him in the face.
“Nerds,” Fi taunted them. “Seriously, what did she just calculate? The square root of a jillion?” Sara stuck her tongue out at Fi, who ducked as Sean sent the pillow back her way. It caught Asher right in the face.
“Thanks a lot, Fi,” Asher joked, and shoved the pillow behind his head. “What were you guys talking about anyway?”
“Oh, you know…just number games to pass the time,” Sean smiled. “Of course, someone had to show off and do her multiplication in binary.”
Though he tried to sound derisive, the brightness in his eyes betrayed his true emotions. Good grief, Fi thought, Sean was completely besotted. “Good for you Sar,” Fi laughed. “If you have to be a super nerd, you might as well show off.”
“C’mon, Fi,” Sean complained. “You’re hardly one to call anyone else names. It’s not like listening to you and Asher play vocabulary games all last summer was fun for the rest of us.”
Fi’s mouth dropped open and then settled into a pout while Sara and Asher laughed. Asher got up from the couch and grabbed the radio. He climbed onto a low metal shelf beneath the window and began fiddling with it.
“Sara,” Sean said, “Fi does have a point. You should show off! You’re smarter than half the people in the Brain. Why won’t you come with me?”
Sara rolled her eyes and Fi smiled. This had to be the hundredth time that Sean had asked this question in some form. “Because she doesn’t want to, Sean,” Fi said, and he shushed her.
“I want Sara to answer.”
Sara bit her lip. “Because I don’t want to, Sean.”
Sean exhaled in exasperation and sat back. They were so enmeshed on the beanbag that there was little room for him to go anywhere. “Why not?”
“Why do you want me to go so badly?” Sara replied. “I already work with you all the time, and I even work for the Brain…through Thiessen,” she added, referring to their programming and logic professor.
It was true, Fi knew. With Sara’s gifts, it would have been seen as selfish if she didn’t contribute. But no one said she had to actually go spend hours in the glossy white network of pods known as the Brain. The image of Sara bent over a tablet in silence with the others, all curled into their ergonomic chairs as if molded to them…Fi shook her head. It was laughable.
“Sean, come on,” Fi interjected. “I want you to just close your eyes and think about the Brain for a minute.”
“Yeah, I know that the guys there are nerdy, but so what?” Sean said defensively.
“No, Sean, really think about it. Imagine bringing Sara there every day. She comes in and sits down at the glass tables with you, and everyone gets to talking. Someone starts a numbers game and she beats the pants off people twice her age…” Fi smirked. “I want you to really think about the impact that Sara’s physical presence would have on the Brain.”
She could see both Sean and Sara following her train of thought. Sara suppressed a laugh when Fi got to “physical,” biting her tongue.
Sean’s jaw worked, but the beginnings of a smile crept across his face. “All right,” he chuckled, “I see your point.” He rubbed Sara’s thigh. “She would definitely be a distraction.”
“A distraction?” Fi hooted. “Sean, she’s way too hot to spend time in the Brain. The guys would never get anything done if she were around all the time. She’s like a math genius version of Wonder Woman, for goodness’ sakes. Every nerd’s dream girl.”
Asher looked up from the radio and laughed. “I have to agree, Sean. Anyway, are there any women under fifty working in the Brain?”
“Of course there are. Don’t be sexist,” Sean retorted, and then paused. “Well, there’s Georgina, and she’s nearly fifty.” His mouth twisted up at the corner. “I hear that we have some promising eleven and twelve year olds.”
Sara chuckled and kissed his cheek. “Tell you what. When they get to be my age, maybe we girls will all take over the Brain together and breathe some freaking life into it.”
Static buzzed from the radio. Asher jiggled the knobs, trying to get a signal. “Ahhh, dammit,” he cursed.
“Just try again when the storm clears, Asher,” Sean said. “It’s probably not great trying to get a signal with all the lightning.” Just as he said that, a clear voice rang through the speaker.
“And as it says in Proverbs, pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Better to be lowly in spirit and among the oppressed, than to share plunder with the proud. That is why Truthers, you must reject the old technologies, you must reject the way of science over faith…”
Once again, the voice was strong and warm, with a quality that Fi found almost magnetic.
“Not this guy again,” Sean complained.
Asher nodded. “I know. Where is this guy, do you think? And how did he get set up with a radio station?”
“You might not need much if you have even one working repeater antenna,” Sean mused, already thinking his way through the possibilities.
“I think the real question is, who is this guy?” Fi said, and Asher met her gaze.
“True, that’s also an interesting question,” he agreed.
In the background, the sermon continued. “He only wants us to live and walk in Truth. And He said, ‘I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.’ Though He gave us dominion over his Garden, the Earth, He did not intend for us to reshape it to our own will. The proof of this is in the Wastelands surrounding you. It was science that did this. It was the folly of Man, thinking himself to be a God, that wrought down this hellfire and damnation. You must humble yourself before God and live within his Garden, sustained by the diet of Faith, to be a Truther…”
“Wow,” Sara murmured. “He’s really…”
“Serious,” Fi finished, and they all grew silent.
The folly of Man, Fi ruminated. Thunder boomed overhead, and they jumped and then laughed. Asher spun the dial on the radio to turn it off and suddenly another voice spoke. A woman’s voice.
“We all must heed the warning, the inspirational message of faith and devotion that Dr. Lawson has brought us in this time of trouble. It is God’s will that we be Truthers, not Liars…”
Asher stared at the radio, confused, and Fi felt her heart speed up.
Sean’s eyes were wide. “Who is that?”
Asher shook his head. “I don’t know, but it’s a different station. Not one of ours and not the other guy’s either.”
“What?” Sean got up and came over to look at the radio. “Two stations that we haven’t created?” Looking
out the window at the storm, he was silent for a moment. “You know sometimes big storms push radio signals out ahead of their usual range, rather than interfering with them. Maybe we just couldn’t hear this one before because it was too far away.” A sudden thought seemed to strike him. “Asher, go through the whole progression, let’s check them all.”
For the next hour, they carefully checked all the frequencies their radio could cover and found only one other unexpected station. Another Truther station.
“How do you think that they’re doing this?” Fi asked Sean, while the new voice sermonized.
“It’s not that hard, actually,” he replied, “if you have a lot of batteries, or can come up with a simple way to create electricity, like our solar panels or the hydroelectric in Eden. Even windmills can work. There are simplified ways to do those sorts of things…and then they just need the radio equipment, like us. I guess it’s not surprising that we aren’t the only ones who thought of it.”
The new voice droned on. “It is the time of Man’s rebirth. Dr. Lawson is leading the way with the Truth. Do not deceive yourselves. If any one of you thinks he is wise by the standards of this age, he should become a ‘fool’ so that he may become wise…”
Sean took a deep breath and exhaled. “Well, it’s obvious who the first guy is. He’s this Dr. Lawson the other two are referencing.”
“Regular little movement the guy has going,” Asher said.
“Just what the world needs now,” Sean said. “A crackpot.”
“I don’t know, Sean,” Fi ventured. “Not everything he’s saying is wrong. We did mess up badly.”
Sean’s head spun so fast that Fi thought his neck would break. His eyes bulged.
“What??? You’re kidding me, right, Fi? I mean, you can’t possibly agree with this guy!”
Suddenly Fi realized that Sean wasn’t the only one looking at her like she was crazy and she flushed. Of course she couldn’t agree with the guy…he did sound crazy. She thought this in her head, but for some reason, she said nothing.
It was Sara who relieved her feelings by changing the subject. “Who cares really, right? It’s just freedom of speech. If some people want to go back to the Earth like the Amish, who cares? I say we focus on dinner while we’re trapped down here.”
Seeds of War Page 10