All I Need

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All I Need Page 14

by Jennifer Van Wyk


  I gulp. “Oh yeah?”

  “Mm hmm. Wanna know what they were about?” he asks, still advancing until my back hits the row of cubbies against the wall.

  “I’m not sure I do,” I admit. The innuendo is there and it’s enough to make my body spark to life. If he admits out loud that my guess is right, or that he was doing the same thing I was last night, I won’t be able to be held accountable for my actions.

  “Hmm. Maybe you’re right. When you’re ready, though, I might give you a detailed description.”

  Holy hell. Yes. Yes, please. Mm hmm. Yup. I’m totally on board that train.

  I take an unsteady breath and my lips form a small O when I blow it out. His eyes drift to my mouth. It feels like a caress, having his eyes on me, eating up every inch of my skin.

  “Leave the poor girl alone, Walker Paul McKinstry,” Linda’s authoritative, but teasing, voice booms through the small space. I startle, my back going straight as I clutch my coffee to my chest.

  “She full named you,” I joke with him. “Seems as though your middle name wasn’t such a mystery after all.”

  Walker only chuckles, stepping back and turning to face Linda.

  “You’re a fun hater, Linda. Anyone ever tell you that?”

  “Pssh. You’re just upset that I caught you trying to get all up in Ellie’s business.”

  He widens his eyes and a giggle bursts out of me and I pat Walker’s chest. “Should I discuss this with HR? You trying to get up in my business?”

  His pinky finger grazes against mine. That simple touch is almost too much for me to handle.

  I bite the inside of my cheek and Walker winks at me. “We have a full day of appointments ahead of us so I probably won’t be around. Linda will be on her best behavior, though, won’t you Linda?”

  “You’re saying that to me? By the looks of things this morning, it appears you need to be the one trying to be on your best behavior.”

  “What can I say? Ellie brings something out in me,” he says, looking right at me.

  “Okay, okay. Enough!” She shoos him out the door. “You said so yourself that you have a full day of appointments. Get on it.”

  With one last heated look, he struts out the door, ass looking insanely perfect in a pair of scrubs.

  “Eyes up north, Ellie girl,” Linda says, snapping in front of my face.

  I press my lips together and shrug.

  “It’s good to see him happy.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Don’t get me wrong. He’s always a cheerful guy and generally happy, too. But that happiness stemmed from others’ joy. Walker is such a giver and has put everyone else first his entire life. It’s an honorable trait to have but I’ve always felt like that meant he didn’t focus on what he wanted. Until now.”

  Her words hit me like a ton of bricks.

  “Until now?”

  She nods, eyes sparkling. “Until you.”

  I lick my lips and look toward the open doorway he just walked through. “That’s a lot of pressure.”

  “His happiness isn’t dependent on you,” she clarifies. “He’s just happier with you in his life.”

  “We just met.”

  “So? I only knew Roger for a few weeks before I knew he was the one. Why should how much time you know someone be indicative to whether or not they bring you happiness or knowing that you want that person in your life? Time is just a number, Ellie. When in your life has more time changed your perception of someone? Trust your instincts. Follow your heart.”

  “Yeah, well, neither have been too forthcoming in the past.”

  “That’s because you weren’t trusting yourself. Your instincts aren’t wrong. Neither is your heart. It’s your head that’s getting in the way of finding your own happiness.”

  “What is it with this town?”

  “Pardon?”

  “Everyone seems to just… know things.”

  Her shoulders rise and fall in a small shrug. “I can’t speak for anyone else, but I do know a little about love and trust. And so do you. That trust, though, has to come from within. Find yourself and the rest will fall in line.”

  She leaves the break room, her words still heavy in the air.

  My phone buzzes in my pocket and I retrieve it, wondering if Courtney’s about to ramble again.

  Allison: Just checking in on you. It’s been a few weeks and I haven’t heard from you. I know you brought that dickhead’s car back. I’m so sorry it all went down like that. I had no idea. I just want you to know that. I hope wherever you are, you’re able to find your happiness.

  Happiness.

  That’s the theme of the day, isn’t it?

  Me: I’m good and truth be told, I am happy. Probably more than I’ve ever been.

  Allison: Really? That’s so good to hear.

  Allison: Have you heard from Gary again?

  Me: Not since I was at his place. A little surprised I haven’t, actually.

  Allison: Brace yourself. Crazy shit’s gone down.

  Me: Gossip? Do tell!

  It’s not lost on me that I’m asking for gossip on my ex-fiancé or the fact that I’m almost giddy rather than nervous to hear it.

  Allison: LOL. Well, if you hadn’t just told me you were happy, begging me for gossip definitely tells me you’re doing good.

  Me: I really am. It’s hard to explain.

  Allison: Well, I hope this doesn’t ruin any of your happiness but… Crystal’s pregnant.

  I gasp, then giggle, then tears well up in my eyes before I laugh again. It’s a rush of emotions and I can’t decide which one to settle on.

  Allison: I’m sorry but I felt like you deserved to know.

  Me: I’m glad you told me. I don’t know what to think about that, though. How far along is she?

  Allison: Two months. Can I call you? It’d be easier to talk than text and I miss youuuuuu.

  Me: LOL. Sure.

  My phone begins ringing immediately and I snatch it up.

  “Hey girl.”

  “Hey,” she sighs. “Man, it’s good to hear your voice.

  “Same for you. I’m sorry I just bailed.”

  “What the hell are you apologizing for? I think if you’d have stayed around I would have judged you for it.”

  We laugh together and it feels good. I did miss her. She was a good friend.

  “Ellie, can I tell you something? Between us, I mean?”

  “Of course.”

  “I wonder if she did it on purpose.”

  Sadly, that was my first thought also.

  “Possibly, though not sure he’s the guy who’s going to stand up and be there for his responsibilities.”

  Allison snorts.

  “What did his dad say?”

  “Oh it’s been a shit show. First of all, Gary made up a huge lie as to why you two weren’t getting married anymore but luckily I was right there to inform him of the truth. A few days after you disappeared, Gary came to the boutique asking if I’d heard from you. He kept going on and on about how he was going to sue you for all the costs incurred from the wedding—you know, since the dick is broke as a joke now.”

  “Poor Gary,” I joke.

  “Right? Literally.”

  Now it’s my turn to snort.

  “Anyway, I reminded him I knew the truth about why you left. He yelled and threw a fit but eventually he left with his head hanging low.”

  “What the hell was I thinking? I should have my ass kicked for giving that man a single minute of my time.”

  “Well, he had us all fooled for just how much of a prick he is.”

  “So what happened with Crystal?”

  “She told him she was pregnant. He and his dad demanded a paternity test. Crystal cried, acted like the victim in all this. Gary’s dad pulled his inheritance on account that he’s a worthless pile of shit.”

  “If Crystal did trap him, I bet she’s regretting that about now. She probably thought she was hopping on the money tra
in.”

  “No doubt. I feel like an idiot for staying friends with her all these years but I guess it brought me to you so she’s not all that bad.”

  “I’m glad we both got something out of it.”

  We talk for about ten more minutes. I tell her a little about the town I now consider home, the people I’m slowly believing to be more family than friends.

  “I love you, Ellie. Please don’t stay a stranger and send me your address. I’m coming to visit you. I need to meet these people.”

  “It’s a plan. Love you, too.”

  “You obviously can rearrange things to how you see fit. This is just how my old brain works,” Linda says, showing me her filing system. Which is pretty cut and dried. Alphabetical folders for the papers that need filed. Her computer system “filing” is a little outdated and could be streamlined but there’s no reason to tell her that. She’s done a phenomenal job helping Walker keep this clinic running so smoothly over the years.

  “I’m afraid I’m never going to live up to the standards you’ve set.”

  She waves me off. “Oh hush. Everyone puts way too much weight on my work. It’s not as hard as everyone makes it out to be. Answer the phone. Pay bills. Record things. File papers. Order supplies. It’s just busy work.”

  She’s downplaying what she does. I make a mental note to tell Walker that he needs to make sure he has a going away party for her because she deserves it.

  “How’s it going, ladies?” Walker says, coming to stand behind both of us.

  “Linda was just going over her filing system.”

  “Ahh. She hasn’t scared you off yet?”

  “Nope. Although, I’m not sure how you’ll survive without her around.”

  “Somehow I have a feeling he’ll get along just fine with you here to take my place,” she says, sliding out of her seat. She taps me on the shoulder and says, “I’m just going to call home quick and check on Roger.”

  We both watch her leave and Walker takes her vacated seat, leaning over on his elbows. The busy morning of checking dogs and cats, a few other random pets here and there, did nothing to quell how delicious this man smells.

  “Did you take another shower?” I ask before I can think better of it.

  He breathes out a laugh, his eyebrows bunching together, teeth biting his bottom lip, his mouth quirking up on the side. “What?”

  “You still smell so dang good but you’ve been around slobbery pets all day long.” I close my eyes, hardly believing I said that out loud.

  He reaches a hand out and threads our pinkies together. “You smell pretty fucking amazing, too.”

  Our eyes lock. The temperature between us spiking from a low simmer to a boil.

  “What are you doing tonight?”

  “I promised Miss Polly I’d take her somewhere.”

  “Are you making that up? It sounds like you just told me you’d be busy washing your hair.”

  Laughing, I tell him, “No. I’m completely serious. She needs more yarn for a baby blanket she’s making for someone in the church. She said she needed out of the house and asked me to join her so she could show me around town a little more.”

  “You’re spending your Friday night at a yarn store with an eighty-year-old lady?”

  “Yup.”

  “Sucks for me because I’d love to spend some time with you but I like that you’ll be with Polly.”

  “Do you ask all your employees to hang out with you on Friday nights?” I ask, only partly joking. He knows a little of my past but he hasn’t exactly told me much about his.

  “Ah, no. This would be a first.”

  “I’m sorry I have plans,” I tell him and it’s the genuine truth. Not that I don’t adore Polly or look forward to spending time with her, but I think he was proposing going on a date and I can’t say that thought didn’t make my stomach flutter.

  “Not your fault. I would say let’s plan for later in the weekend but Grayson and I are leaving first thing in the morning for Chicago.”

  “What’s in Chicago?”

  “Baseball. Annual trip for the two of us. Sometimes his dad will join us if his schedule allows.”

  “Mick?”

  “Yeah. Right now he’s planning to be there, but we’ll see.”

  “Sounds like you’ll have a good time and I’m sure Grayson would love to see his dad.”

  “Yeah. Sucks, though,” he repeats his earlier sentiment. “I wanted to see you more before I’m gone for the weekend.”

  “I’m not going anywhere.”

  “Your next patient is here, Walker,” the queen of interruption says.

  “She’s got stellar timing, yeah?” I say quietly with a grin and Walker nods his head in agreement.

  “If I get back in time Sunday night, I’ll stop over and see you.”

  The fact that he’s upset about not seeing me for a while is definitely good for my soul.

  “Okay. Send me a picture of you guys at the game.”

  “I’ll definitely keep in touch while we’re gone,” he squeezes my pinky again before trudging off, back to work.

  At the end of the day, Linda shows me how to lock up and close the clinic down for the weekend. Walker was called away to an emergency visit so I didn’t get a chance to talk to him again before closing time.

  I can’t say that I wasn’t slightly disappointed but with the promise of talking over the weekend, I hopped into my car and headed back home, Linda’s words about being happier because someone is in my life ringing in my ears.

  “CAN WE STOP FOR FOOD?”

  “I packed a cooler and a bunch of snacks. It’s in the back seat.”

  “Cool. Thanks, man. I was starving.”

  “It’s been a few hours since you demolished six eggs for breakfast. You were probably wasting away to nothing.”

  “It felt like it,” Grayson mumbles, shoving a huge bite of sandwich into his mouth.

  “Your dad going to make it, you think?”

  He shrugs like he doesn’t care either way but I know better. “Dunno. He said he was going to try but I doubt it. He’s been kind of flaky or something lately.”

  “Flaky how?”

  “Just like, not really flaky, I guess. More secretive or something. It used to be when he’d Facetime me he’d be walking around the house or the yard, showing me things he’s done to the place but lately he just sits in one spot and doesn’t say a whole lot.”

  “Maybe it’s just stress. Or, you know, his old age. He is about to turn forty, you know.”

  “Like you have much room to talk. You’re thirty-five.”

  I reach into the cooler and grab a soda, popping the top and taking a long drink before placing it in the cup holder. “Yeah, but I have the body of a thirty-year-old.” I flex my forearm in front of him and he shoves me away.

  He pushes back into the seat like my arm is somehow offensive. “Gross.”

  “How is that gross?” I ask, mock glaring at him.

  “How is it not? Don’t talk about your body, man. That’s just… gross.”

  “You said that already.”

  “That’s because it is. Though,” he pauses, turning to me with a shit-eating grin. “I bet Ellie doesn’t think it’s gross.”

  Just her name brings a smile to my face.

  “Holy crap, Walker! Look at you.” he punches my shoulder before finishing off the rest of his sandwich and downing some Gatorade. “You’re all googly eyed over her.”

  “I am not.”

  “Are too.”

  “Am…” Our childish argument is interrupted by the sound of his phone. He lifts it up, typing away as I slow down the pickup in the heavy Chicago traffic.

  “It’s dad,” he mutters.

  “And?”

  “He said he’s gonna be there.”

  “Yeah? Good. It’s been a while.” He’s quiet, head resting on the back of the seat and I wonder why he doesn’t seem more excited about it. “You don’t want him to join us?”


  “It’s not that. It’s just… he almost acted like he was doing me a favor for coming. Like it was a burden.”

  As much as I like the guy, hearing that makes me want to punch him right in the balls. How Grayson could ever be a burden to anyone is beyond me. I know I won’t be able to keep my mouth shut this weekend but I’ve learned when and where to do it. I’ll talk to Mick when it’s just the two of us. For now, I do what I do best, keep Grayson happy and say the words I know he needs to hear.

  “You’d never be a burden to anyone, kid. He’s probably just distracted because of work and packing to get here for the game tonight.”

  “Yeah, maybe.” He doesn’t seem convinced and the older he gets, the more he reads between the lines of his dad’s words and actions. Mick better figure his shit out soon or he’ll lose Grayson all together.

  After we check in to the hotel, Grayson decides to take a quick shower before we head out to walk around Chicago a bit until game time. I take the time to check in with Ellie while he’s not watching me, able to tease me about the girl I like more than I probably should.

  Me: We’re all checked in at the hotel.

  Her reply comes almost instantly.

  Ellie: How was your drive? Did Grayson make you stop for food every couple of hours?

  I chuckle, she already knows us so well.

  Me: I was smart and packed a cooler.

  Ellie: That is smart. What are you doing now?

  Me: Missing you.

  I stare at the words and decide against hitting Send. I’m jumping ahead of myself where Ellie is concerned and need to respect the time and space she needs to heal.

  Instead, I reply with the truth. Boring, but true.

  Me: Just waiting for Grayson to get out of the shower. Then we’re going to walk around a bit before the game.

  Ellie: Sounds fun. I’ve never been to Chicago. Take lots of pictures for me.

  Me: What? You’ve never been to Chicago? We’ll have to fix that.

  This time I do hit send.

  Ellie: I’d like that. **three smiley face emojis**

  Three smiley faces. That’s gotta be a good sign.

  Me: Where else do you want to go?

  Ellie: I don’t know. I’ve not really been anywhere.

  Me: If you had to pick one place.

 

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