“Oh, it’s completely normal for us,” Gregorio explains from his workstation. Wanting everyone’s attention, the gnome flicks two bolts of electricity at the sleeping vampires to wake them up. “Sorry, but a man of my age shouldn’t have to repeat himself. Lost is the daughter of Chastity, which can be determined by tasting their blood. Also, she possesses her mother’s telekinesis, but it appears she uses it to control that bunny and enhance her own physical abilities instead of influencing objects. My catalog scan does have her at three powers, but they are on a broader scale. It feels rude to go into the details with an audience though, so I will only say psychic conquering and heightened senses. To answer Mab’s question, it’s possible that Dawn Fang babies begin building memories immediately much like how other vampire types remember the day they were turned. I find her aging the true curiosity since her blood is still in a state of change, which makes me think Lost can stop her growth at any point. Whether she can restart it or go backwards is another mystery that I can’t answer at this time, but I doubt the latter is a possibility. I would need my full laboratory to get the full picture, but right now we should focus on the fact that she exists.”
“Your father wasn’t a vampire,” Chastity softly whispers. Sliding off the bed, she grabs a brush to work the knots out of her hair. “Not that I haven’t slept with Xavier Tempest, but that was long ago when he and Nadia were having a kinky marriage phase. Pretty sure me being sworn to secrecy on that doesn’t matter anymore. So, it’s impossible for him to be your father, Lost. Not to mention you’re part elf, which should have eliminated him completely if you knew I was your mother the whole time. The only silver-haired elf that I’ve slept with was one who was passing through on some adventure. Don’t know his name, but he earned a full weekend in my private chambers before he left. No idea where he is now either. Does this mean she’s not a full-blooded vampire?”
Taking a moment to clean his tinted goggles, Gregorio looks over his notes to make sure he can talk with certainty. “Every test has her as a true Dawn Fang. It’s possible that, unlike other mixed breeds, one can only be all vampire or not at all. This makes me wonder if there have been any mortal births caused by our people. I assume there is a biological method to determine how this works. For example, what if the deciding factor of vampirism is the mother while the father is responsible more for the physical appearance? That means any male Dawn Fangs who mated with a female mortal would have produced a mortal baby. I can’t say if that would produce a child with powers or-”
“Why does any of this matter?” Lost interrupts before leaping back into the wardrobe. She opens the door enough to throw all of the clothes out along with shredded fabric that used to be several pairs of colorful socks. “If I wanted to be with my mother then I would have stayed here instead showing up a few times, pretending I was someone else when we met, erase her memory of me, and gone off to find my father. Now, I don’t even know where to go. Just leave me alone and don’t let that bad woman near me. She’s hurt me enough.”
“I can’t handle this,” Chastity says as she rushes out the door.
9
The mortals in the crowd cheer while the vampires watch in awkward horror as Chastity dances along the bar. She rapidly takes every shot that has been lined up, the alcohol mixed with enough blood to give her a buzz. Staying in the back, the regulars whisper and try to figure out if they have ever seen the beloved hostess drink to such an extent in the past. Nobody is sure, but there is a wave of tension that repeatedly flows through the entire establishment. Even those in the lower floors discover a faint level of resistance whenever they move, as if invisible hands are pushing against their bodies. Only a few people realize that Chastity is using her telekinesis on them, so they remain perfectly still and wait to see what will happen. Many of the patrons chant her name when she begins to set up another line of drinks, but their celebration is cut short when Clyde walks behind the bar. Even those who have never seen the Dawn Fang before take a step back and quiet down out of fear of garnering his attention. Flipping his friend onto his shoulder, he carries her to a booth and snaps his fingers to make it look like a sign has come out of the ceiling. The promise of half off drinks drives the crowd to rush forward, which frightens the already nervous bartenders standing behind the alcohol-covered bar.
“You better be paying for the free stuff,” Chastity mutters as she makes herself comfortable in the corner. Knocking on the wall above her head, she keeps her hand up until a goblin places a hot strawberry cake on her palm. “It hurts, but I don’t care. Speaking of not caring, why are you the one out here? Don’t get me wrong since I appreciate the concern, but this isn’t a problem you can steal, threaten, or brutalize your way out of.”
“Unfortunately for both us, I’m all you have right now,” Clyde says while fashioning an illusionary conversation. The smell of burning flesh causes him to take the hot plate from his friend and toss her a flask of blood. “Titus and Bob are trying to coax Lost out of the wardrobe and Luther feels like he made the situation worse. I told him to come out here anyway, but he has a point that he might be biased. Coconspirators tend to be pretty bad at consoling each other after the truth comes out. We tried to convince Mab to be the listening ear. She wanted me to say that she’s a woman and understands what you’re going through, but doesn’t think she can avoid poking fun at you. It’s the only way she knows how to cheer you up and this isn’t the right situation for friendly ribbing. Nobody tried to ask Gregorio since that would require him leaving his equipment. That leaves me, so let’s try our best.”
“This conversation is happening against my better judgment,” the hostess claims with a wry smile. Wiggling her finger, she uses her powers to cut a slice of cake and has it float within reach of her mouth. “So many emotions that I don’t even know where to start. Remember the days when we didn’t feel so mortal? I miss those right now. The funniest thing is that Lost hating me hurts a lot, but I didn’t know she was my daughter until thirty minutes ago. A vampire stressing out over her teenager despising her sounds like a bad bard’s tale. Yet, here I am calling myself a terrible mother.”
“Well, you did abandon her,” Clyde mentions, earning himself the rest of the cake in his face. Wincing at the sensation of hot strawberries sticking to his flesh, he wipes the dessert off and licks his fingers. “This is probably going to be more semantics than anything else. You can’t call yourself a mother since you didn’t raise her. That doesn’t mean you’re terrible, but it means you haven’t taken on the role yet. Kind of like me saying I’m a horrible pirate when I’ve never attempted to be one. Should I just hit myself whenever you give me that look of what I’m guessing is disdain?”
Chastity nods her head and waits for her friend to punch himself in the side, the snap of a rib causing her to pass the blood flask across the table. “No reason to be that rough. In fact, let’s try to talk like regular people. You’re a friend who I’m opening my heart to, which is something neither of us have done in centuries. It’s hard to get over the silliness of the whole situation. I hate saying that because I know mortals would be destroyed by what I went through. We have the benefit of immortality, which allows us to heal over time. Not only physical, but mental and emotional wounds as well. These blips of pain are erased as we move further away from the event and rationalize it. A vampire giving birth? The idea was ridiculous, so there was no reason to dwell on it. Now . . . I have to face the reality again and wonder if I should have fought harder or mourned longer. Lost isn’t wrong. I ditched her while only thinking of myself and effectively ruined her childhood. With how she grew up, I might have destroyed her entire life. Taking all of that into account, someone like me probably doesn’t deserve a child.”
“You definitely had too much to drink.”
“I sleep around and-”
“Created a business and show more kindness than any vampire I’ve ever met.”
“But-”
“There is nobody else in the gang that
I could see being a parent.”
Feeling her body heat up, Chastity curls her legs against her body and goes back to eating the cake. It takes her a moment to realize the warmth is from embarrassment instead of the other emotions that are battling in her heart. Knocking on the wall, she has a goblin drop a plate of cookies on the table and floats over two mugs of frothy ale to help wash the cream-filled desserts down. Hoping to distract herself long enough to clear her mind, Chastity waves for a crimson scroll to fly to her hand. She examines the numbers that are gradually changing as the goblins make more products and the patrons enjoy the impromptu sale. Piercing the tip of her finger with a fang, she creates a magical order that goes out along with the necessary payment from the treasury in the attic. The instant she puts the scroll away, her heart aches and she grabs a handful of cookies to jam into her mouth.
“Guess the benefit of being a Dawn Fang is that choking isn’t a problem, which is strange since our lungs kind of work,” Clyde teases, his keen senses noticing her subtle struggling against a whole cookie in her throat. A solid smack to her back helps dislodge the food as well as cracking both of her shoulder blades. “Sorry about that. I feel like I should give you some more advice, but I can’t figure out why you’re still upset. Lost hates you like many children do at this age and those are the ones who grew up with their parents. You aren’t in trouble with me about keeping this a secret since I understand how personal a loss it was. On the other hand, isn’t that loss erased by her being alive?”
“Thanks for trying, but you really need to stick to punching things,” Chastity replies, hoping her friend goes away. She lies down on the bench when Clyde dips a cookie into his ale and takes a nibble. “Damn immortals and having all the time in the world. Fine, I feel guilty about all of this. You see that single woman over there and the mortal couple in the corner? I overheard them talking when they came in. They’re going through what I went through with Lost. All in pain and unable to reverse the tragedy. Why do I get a second chance with the daughter I abandoned when people better than me have to find the strength to continue on?”
“Because life is cruel to some and nice to others,” he responds while watching the three mortals. Reaching out to squeeze his friend’s shoulder, a strange pang in his chest gives him a faint idea of what she might be feeling. “I’m jealous. Try as I might, I can’t raise the same emotions that the rest of you can. That’s why I can’t think of anything to say in regard to your guilt. You don’t really have a choice in feeling that, but a positive spin is that now we can stop other Dawn Fangs from making the same mistake. I don’t know if that makes you feel better, which is why I don’t really know what else to do. Only other thing I can think of is that you shouldn’t punish Lost for surviving. Sure, she hates you, but that’s only because you walked away. Now, you’re both here and have a chance to fix mistake.”
The hostess pulls the cookies away from her friend and floats two brownies to the plate. “I should have known you’d eventually come out with a version of taking this head-on. You’re right though. I can only control my own life and actions. The first step is to be honest with my . . . daughter. Think she’s ever going to like me?”
“If you won Mab over then I’m sure Lost won’t be too difficult.”
“That’s not encouraging.”
“How about pointing out that you two have eternity?”
“I’m going to tell the others to never let you attempt this type of talk again.”
*****
Straddling the glowing orb on the roof, Lost watches the hummingbirds dart through the night sky. Her crimson eyes shimmer in the green moonlight and her body shivers as the winter chill battles the beginning of spring. Barely visible among the ebony shingles, a vent to her right fills the air with the delicious smells of the bakery. Voices echo in her ears, but she only picks out a few words without realizing that she can hear the conversations far beneath her feet. The occasional scream and gasp catches her attention and she considers going to investigate before she remembers who could be waiting inside. Stroking her bunny’s belly, Lost stares into the distance and barely makes out the hot spring. The surrounding illusions gradually peel away as she watches the wisps of steam rise into the air. She is unsure what the people are doing in the steaming water and is about to leap over the trees to get a closer look when a wooden thunk makes her freeze. Whirling around, she spots the top of a ladder leaning against the far end of the roof. Preferring to be alone, the vampire tries to run in the opposite direction and bounces off Chastity, who catches her by the wrist before she falls.
“The two of us need to talk,” the older Dawn Fang says, her grip loosening enough for Lost to pull free. Walking to the top of the roof, she waves a hand over the vent and creates a ball of aromatic steam in her palm. “I’m very sorry about what I did to you. If I had known you weren’t really dead, I’d have raised you. While you would say it’s no excuse, I want you to realize that nobody knew you were a possibility. I made a mistake hiding my pregnancy from my friends and trying to handle it on my own. I was driven by a bizarre mix of maternal pride and fear of being different than the other Dawn Fangs.”
“Don’t forget stupidity, selfishness, and pure meanness,” Lost angrily interjects. Staying near the edge of the roof, she looks down to watch a group of drunks wander down the sloping road. “If you really cared about the child you lost then you would have visited my grave at least once. You would have seen that I was alive. What was that, bunny? Yes, she could have thought an animal dug me up and ate me, but that doesn’t help me here. Wouldn’t that be reason enough to search for a piece? I find it hard to believe you care so much about me when you couldn’t have been with me for more than a few minutes. Wild animals hold their young, dead or alive, for longer than you did.”
“Don’t you dare to assume what I went through,” Chastity snaps, her powers shaking the building. Hearing the goblins snarl and people inside complain about spilling their drinks, she takes a deep breath and forces herself to relax. “I held you for an entire day and nothing changed, so I buried you. Now, I have a question. If you remember me then that means you were conscious before I gave up. I didn’t check for a heartbeat or breathing, which is my fault. Yet, you didn’t say anything.”
“Babies don’t talk.”
“They do cry.”
“Maybe I didn’t see a reason to.”
“I was putting dirt on you.”
“Could have thought it was a game of hide and seek.”
“You were an infant.”
“Which makes you blaming me for this rather pathetic.”
Frustrated with the defiant Dawn Fang, Chastity covers her mouth to muffle a scream that still rattles Lost’s ears. Mistaking the noise for an attack, the girl throws her bunny at her mother’s face. The animal is batted away and sent flying into the birch forest, but it comes hurtling back a few seconds later. It makes it back to the building and is about to attack when a flock of hummingbirds dart out of the shadows. Buzzing around the rodent, they spear it with their long beaks and try to hold it down. The birds quiver for a minute before collapsing to the ground, their twitching bodies steadily losing their colorful luster. Lost picks up her bunny and checks its injuries, which are seeping a foul-smelling pus that she tries to squeeze out of her limp pet. She frowns at the sound of cracking bones and cuts her finger on the rabbit’s teeth to drip some blood into its mouth. To Chastity’s surprise, the animal shivers and abruptly vomits everything that has been stuffed into its body.
“This is who rescued me from the tomb you put me in,” Lost declares while cradling the rabbit. The animal yawns and sprawls in her arms, but its body slumps as if there is very little inside to maintain its shape. “Bunny has been by my side through everything. He’s very protective of me and I don’t want him to ever get hurt. Kind of stinky though, so I guess he needs a bath. Now, why didn’t you tell my father about me? He could have come by my grave and discovered your crime. Now, I’m stuck with you
as the only family I have and I’m not happy about that.”
“A funeral isn’t a crime,” Chastity says through gritted teeth. Hearing the ladder move, she goes to angrily kick it over without checking to see who is climbing up. “I didn’t know who your father was until you were born. One of my trades is pleasure, which is something I indulge in nearly every night. The list of possible fathers was really long and I make absolutely no apologies for that. As far as contacting your father after your birth, I didn’t bother trying to find him. What would I have done? Tell a stranger that I had his stillborn baby? It was a fun fling for both of us and I saw no reason for him to suffer like I did.”
“So, there wasn’t any love involved in my creation,” the girl states with tears welling up in her eyes. She dabs at them with her bunny, which wriggles as if she is tickling it. “The more you talk, the more horrible a creature you seem. The worst part is that you’re the only blood family that I have. I tried to put my blood into others, but it wasn’t the same. They were obedient and loyal, but something was missing. Even the gnomes who raised me didn’t give me what I really wanted.”
“You wanted a place to belong,” her mother answers, surprising the girl by bluntly getting to the truth. The hostess takes a seat on the orb, which sends a wave of warmth throughout her body. “I know the look in your eyes very well. Before Dawn Fangs existed, it was common for vampires to turn mortals and leave them behind. Some did it by accident and others for fun. The result was the same though. You get a vampire who felt like a permanent outsider. Even those of us who were kept could be made to feel like that. I was an innocent farmgirl who was turned by a vampire to be an immortal love slave. I thought I was being punished and didn’t know if there was a place I truly belonged because it didn’t feel like it was by my maker’s side. Then, Clyde killed him and freed me, which helped me find the home and family I always wanted. Honestly, I find your situation easier to fix since I’m willing to make amends for what I did. For example, I haven’t yelled at you for smashing a hole in my wardrobe and bedroom wall.”
Lost (War of Nytefall Book 2) Page 16