by Mandy Harbin
When he reached the stage, she stood and watched as he held onto the handrail, making his way toward the center. She wanted to run to him, but she couldn’t. Not with the whole town crammed into this room, watching.
The governor made his way to the podium, and Caitlin took her seat. It was time for the ceremony to start anyway. The governor went through the pomp and circumstance of his speech, and all she could think about was that last day with Axle. At the beginning of the day, she’d been high on the story break she’d gotten while also hurting for Axle, knowing their time together was coming to an end. By the end of the day, she’d been frantically trying to see him in the medical ward. Alec—AA—had told her he’d call her as soon as Axle’s condition stabilized. She’d been shoved onto the first plane out of the country, and by the time she landed in Dubai, she’d had a voicemail telling her Axle had made it out of his first surgery. AA had called her a couple more times over the next week with updates. Then he’d gone onto another assignment, and Axle was sent home to recover from his injuries. She had no idea if he’d been medically discharged or was on leave. Thanks to HIPAA and the impenetrable wall of the military, she’d been unable to find out specifically. She had theories based on research. It wasn’t as if she could reach out to Axle and ask. Even if she knew his number, he’d made it clear before he’d gotten hurt that he didn’t want anything to do with her.
And then he’d gotten injured.
All because of her.
If she hadn’t gone, he wouldn’t have been put on a special assignment to protect her. Nor would he have been forced to work in the same proximity as the madman colleague of hers. Axle was a hardened special ops. She could only imagine the battles he fought for the greater good, and he’d taken several bullets because someone thought dramatizing the war made for good news clips. She was surprised Axle even looked at her today.
She could only image how much hatred he felt toward her. She didn’t want to think about it, actually. It was why she’d only asked Heather a couple of times to find out his status. Once she knew he was doing better, she had to do whatever she could to give him the space he’d asked for.
He’d sacrificed for.
And here he was, still sacrificing himself for the sake of her.
“…So it’s my esteemed pleasure to introduce Axle Landry.” The governor turned to Axle and clapped as the audience gave him a standing ovation. Caitlin swallowed, her heart pounding as she watched him make his way to the podium.
He shook the governor’s hand, thanked the audience, and graciously asked them to take their seats. After several moments, they finally complied. “It’s great to be here today. Arkansas is a pretty damn good state.” Another round of applause with some whooping from the audience. He laughed, seemingly lighthearted, and it was music to Caitlin’s ears. He hadn’t shown her an easygoing side of himself, but then again, they’d been in the middle of a warzone.
Since she could stare at him unabashedly, she drank him in. He looked good in his dress uniform. Damn good. He still looked tough with an air of authority. Even hobbling slightly, he still pulled it off. But the uniform, that was such a contradiction to all images she had of him. He’d always worn military fatigues. Except when he had nothing on at all.
She shoved that thought away as fast as it formed.
Axle continued with his speech, discussing his time in the military, his service to this country, and the horrors of war. She listened, his words beautiful even when the topic held such devastating consequences. Then he looked at her.
The air in her lungs locked.
“This isn’t about me, though. When I got asked to speak today, I was truly humbled. Caitlin Cooper is one of the bravest people I know, and that includes some of the toughest men and women I’ve served alongside. Without her, I wouldn’t be standing here before you, and a roomful of children might not have lived to one day make a difference in this world. She taught me that,” he said slowly, and looked back toward the audience. Tears threatened at the sincerity of his words. “I’m so incredibly honored to be a part of her big day and will forever treasure witnessing her receiving the Bronze Star Medal.”
People clapped and Axle joined in, watching her. Caitlin blushed, but she couldn’t look away from him, as she was transfixed in his gaze. She didn’t agree with his words, but she appreciated him making this easier. He could have stood up and told it like it was without sugarcoating the reality.
He was too good of a man to do that.
Axle had been awarded the highest award for his actions in the battle. He’d been the one to take out the threats to those children. If it hadn’t been for him doing that, there would’ve been no need for her to shuttle them into a closet. Saving those children—and her—had earned him the Medal of Honor. She’d been so proud of him when she’d heard the news. She couldn’t count the number of times she watched online clips of the president awarding it to him. He very much deserved the recognition. Caitlin, however, felt like a hack. She hadn’t been the one putting her life on the line for others. She’d been a nervous wreck, shot her colleague and then stabbed him, and then passed out. She hadn’t even been able to leave the building that day on her own two feet.
Neither had he, the voice in her head taunted. That little voice of reason had been busy ever since she learned the news of this award a few weeks ago. She hadn’t felt worthy, but then she figured most people who received recognition didn’t.
When Axle finished, she mouthed, “Thank you.” His words meant more to her than the medal itself.
He inclined his head before an officer stood and shook his hand, dismissing him from his speech. Caitlin rose and went to the center as instructed. The officer completed the ceremony, and with practiced precision, she saluted him. Unable to stop herself, she glanced at Axle. He had a look of pride, and she knew she’d nailed it. Lord knew she’d practiced a bazillion times. Joy and nerves mingled as she started in on the small speech she’d prepared. Her voice shook, but she did her best to get through it without breaking down.
“…No one is ever prepared to see the devastation of war. There are men and women who face terror head-on every day. We honor those who served on Veteran’s Day. We remember those who lost their lives on Memorial Day. But the rest of time, we civilians carry on with our lives not thinking much about the freedom they protect. I wasn’t selfless that day. Alec Acker, Pierce Haverty, Brooks Chamberlain, Ryder Lawrence, Logan Hardwick, Kayden Wright, and Axle Landry were,” she said, making sure to look at Axle when she said his name from the list of men assigned to her protection. She was grateful, of course, but in the end, all she’d done was protect the man she loved when he couldn’t do it himself.
There was an awkward silence. Had she veered off script and said that last part out loud? Her gaze shot to Axle. His eyes flared. She cleared her throat and looked at her notes, the last spoken words drifting through her head, “All I did was protect the man I love.” She had said it. Oh, God. “Um, the man who protected me,” she said immediately, and continued with the carefully crafted words as if she’d never made that confession. To a room full of people. She glanced at her parents as she spoke. Her dad was so proud he probably hadn’t even heard what she said. Her mom, on the other hand, had a knowing look in her eyes. Caitlin’s gaze darted away from the compassionate scrutiny.
When she finished, the crowd cheered, and she couldn’t help but smile in gratitude as she stepped off the stage. She shook hands with the people closest to her before branching out and greeting many of the local townspeople. Most of the other guys on her detail had been overseas, but AA and Brooks where there and hugged her.
Her parents gushed all over her, but quickly moved away so she could continue thanking people. When the lieutenant governor reached for her hand, she started. Then she hated he’d caught her unawares. She’d seen him earlier, knew he was here, but she had hoped to avoid him. When he pulled her closer, she wanted to balk, remembering how he’d trapped her all those years ago when he’d been an aid
e. She hid her reaction and locked her knees to keep professional pretenses since people were standing all around.
“You’re looking lovely as always, Cait. How about dinner later, so I can show you proper appreciation?”
“Let. Go.”
The command was decisive, but it hadn’t come from her.
She could feel Axle’s body heat from behind. God, that voice of his melted her in all the right places. She wanted to sink into his warmth, but she couldn’t ever do that again. He was here because he’d been asked to speak. He’d smiled and been courteous, but there wasn’t anything between them, and she’d do right to remember that.
The jerk holding her hand dropped it and glanced around, smiling nervously and obviously hoping he hadn’t caused a scene with his constituents.
“You ever come near her again, I’ll kill you myself,” he whispered. Then he reached out, grabbed the man’s hand and shook it. “Thank you, Sir,” he said with fake enthusiasm, probably keeping up pretenses of a more civilized conversation. The slime ball walked away.
“Thank you,” she said without turning toward Axle.
“He’s lucky I didn’t call in a sniper the day you told me he’d made you uncomfortable on the job.” She’d forgotten about that. They’d been talking about his sister and something to do with sexual harassment.
He had an amazing memory.
Everything about him was.
His hand landed on her shoulder. Her eyes drifted close, but she quickly opened them, not wanting to get lost in this man, as he turned her to face him.
He opened his mouth to speak, but the heat in his gaze had her scrambling to stop what he was about to say. More nerves? Definitely.
“How’s your leg?”
He smiled slowly. “Hurts like a sonofabitch.”
She winced. “I’m sorry.”
His eyes popped, and then his brow furrowed. “You say that like it’s your fault.”
“Well, it is. I mean, you were protecting me when it—”
“Jesus, between you and Shelby…” He drifted off, shaking his head. “Why do I have the feeling if I tell you it comes with the job, it won’t ease whatever screwed up blame you’ve got going on?”
“Because it won’t.”
“Hell, Caitlin, that wasn’t the first time I’ve been shot. Or the second. And those are just wounds I’ve endured from the business end of a gun, not counting all the other kinds of injuries I gotten over the years.”
She hadn’t thought about it like that, not that she relished the idea of him being seriously injured multiple times in his career.
“I had a dangerous job. One I loved for a long time. Believe me, I’m proud of my service. My scars are badges. Now that I’ve been discharged, they’re reminders of all the good I did for people.”
“Oh God,” she breathed. He’d been discharged because of the injury. She’d worried about that, and now he confirmed that horrible fear.
He leaned onto his cane and cupped her cheek with his free hand. “I’m alive because of you.”
“You’re hurt because of—”
His mouth landed on hers, and she gasped at the sudden contact. All that did was give him an opening to deepen the kiss, and all worries about causing him harm fled…at least in this moment. He tasted of mouthwash and tea and so much potential that she shook as she finally allowed herself to lean into him and hold on for dear life.
Because life was dear. They’d both been close to losing that precious thing.
When he broke away, he said hoarsely, “Did you mean what you said? No, don’t answer that.” He laughed gently. “I love you, too. If either of us owes the other an apology, I’m the one who should be doing the groveling. I pushed you away because my feelings were a distraction to your safety. I couldn’t allow anything to happen to you. I’d rather hurt a thousand times than you feel pain in the slightest. If anything had happened to you because I wasn’t on my A game, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. That’s how precious you’d become to me.”
“Axle,” she said on a light breath.
“It happened so fast. You slipped into the desert and crashed right into my heart. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. Ever.”
“Me too.”
He kissed her again. God, she’d missed him so much.
A throat cleared beside them.
With a groan, Axle pulled away. “What?” he barked at the man who’d interrupted them.
Hunter Anderson. She leaned her head on Axle’s chest and wanted to laugh that her childhood crush had no effects on her libido. Oh, time was a wonderful thing.
“I want to congratulate my old friend here,” Hunter said, pulling her out of Axle’s arms into a bear hug. “Heather is—”
“Right here,” Heather squealed, and yanked her out of Hunter’s arms and into hers. “I’m so proud of you.” She pulled back. “Don’t ever do something like that again!” She crushed Caitlin to her again. “But I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you,” Caitlin said with a laugh. “But it was my job.” The words so similar to Axle’s clicked into place. He’d been doing his job when he’d gotten hurt, and Caitlin just told Heather the danger of her job was worth the risk.
“And you did an amazing one. That piece on the military cover-up of the arms deal went viral. And that Russian bit? Holy cow! Story of your career, girl.”
A journalist’s dream. Afterward, she’d become the one being interviewed on the talk show circuit because everyone wanted to hear about her experience. It had been surreal. Breaking that story had changed everything.
Heather leaned back. “Wait a minute. What do you mean was your job?”
Caitlin winced. She hadn’t told anyone back home about her new job with a local station. When she’d been offered the nightly news anchor position, she’d thought WWCAD? And had promptly decided her icon would ride the high of publicity and take the wonderful desk job. Caitlin still battled with nightmares, and she wasn’t sure when she’d feel comfortable reporting live from a warzone again…if ever. Truth was, she’d missed Arkansas. She missed home.
“You’re looking at the new anchor for Channel 4 News at six and ten.”
“Oh my gosh!” Heather said in a rush.
“Yeah.”
“Oh my gosh!” she said again even louder.
“Yeah,” Caitlin repeated on a chuckle. “I’m moving back.”
Heather squealed in earnest. Caitlin felt her joy down to her toes. She wanted to steal a glance at Axle to gauge his reaction, but she was too chicken. They hadn’t decided anything. Just because they loved each other—
Caitlin gasped as she was ripped from Heather’s arms and crushed into the welcoming chest she’d missed so much. “Thank fuck,” he breathed.
“Well, this is great news,” some other guy said. She didn’t have to know who it was to know he’d been happy to hear this news. She was about to ask him why he cared about her job, but he turned to Axle. “You have no reason to turn me down now.”
Huh?
“Yeah,” Axle said. “We’ll talk, Gauge.”
You’ll talk about what?
“Awesome, man.” Caitlin watched as Hunter clapped Axle’s shoulder. “We’ll give you some privacy.” He clutched Heather. She pouted as she was dragged away by her brother. She smiled at her friend and looked up into Axle’s eyes.
“What are you going to talk about?”
“Gauge offered me a job with The Bang Shift.”
She gaped at him. “You know what they do, right? I mean, besides the car stuff?” She’d been shocked to learn Hunter was a mercenary, and it had angered her to think Axle had been one, too. Funny how time…and feelings…and near death experiences…changed things.
“Yeah. He told me.”
She laughed then, remembering how mad she’d gotten. “I was so pissed when I thought you’d been hired to protect me and not assigned.”
He chuckled. “Technically, I was paid.” He shrugged. “Anyway, I told
him no at first. Then he told me you were coming here when the ceremony finalized. The feds needed extra protection since you decided to rock the world with your breaking news.”
“Can’t help it I’m good.” She winked.
“Yes, yes, you are.” He kissed her swiftly.
“So you’re here to protect me?”
“Of course. And then when the organizers found out I’d be here, they asked if I wanted to speak. Told them I’d be honored.”
She smiled up at him. “So this was like your job interview.”
“Yeah. He wasn’t happy I’d told him I had to think about it because, well, I was entertaining a job offer in Atlanta,” he said pointedly.
“You were going to move by me.” It wasn’t a question, and the knowledge left her all warm inside. He loved her. He truly did.
“Hard to be with you if I didn’t. Out of the two of us, I’m the most flexible job-wise right now, though you just made my decision pretty damn easy.”
Happiness for her, for this man, bloomed within. She could see herself spending the rest of her life with him, and the way he looked at her, it was a safe bet he felt the same way.
“And you’re okay working with Hunter?”
Axle’s eyes narrowed, but a smile slowly formed. “Gotta keep an eye on your old boyfriend.”
“What? I told you we didn’t have a thing,” she said quickly.
“Mmm,” he said, obviously not quite convinced. “That’s good because I’m a territorial S.O.B.”
“Lots of little girls have crushes. Then we grow up.”
His eyes twinkled. “I’m sure you were completely adorable.”
“Yeah, not the word I’d pick to describe it.” She shrugged. “So you’re cool with working for him? Doing the job, I mean.”
Axle stroked her arm, and goosebumps erupted along the path. “I have a special skillset. There’s a lot going on that we need to talk about. Dangers that can come knocking. But today is your day. We have plenty of time to get into all of that.”
“Okay,” she said slowly, not really sure what to think about that. A more important question was pressing, and she leaned in a little, wanting to tease him. “But tell me something. What makes you think you’ll even like me once you get to know me?”