by Rachel Smith
“You bitch!” he yelled as he kicked me in the ribs over and over. “Get up!” He grabbed my wrist and dragged me to my feet. Pain shot all the way up my left arm as he pushed me away from him. I fell back into my kitchen table and chairs, scrambling to get out of his way. He was stalking toward me again with determination. It was a sick feeling to know he wasn’t done beating on me.
“Please, Colton. Stop!” I yelled. He struck me again, hitting my nose and mouth this time. I immediately tasted the tang of blood. He grabbed me around the throat and gave me another shove to the end of the table. I crashed into the buffet and slid to the ground as dishes shattered all around me. I tried to get up but was too weak. Resting my head on my arm, I watched as the mixture of blood and tears streamed down, dripping silently into a tiny pool on the floor.
He was going to kill me.
“Please,” I whispered one more time. I didn’t have the energy to yell. He gripped my hair one last time, raising my head to sneer in my face.
“I fucking own you, bitch. You make records, you go on tour, and you are an A-list celebrity making a shit load of money all because of me. I will not give up my payday because you have some sort of moral fucking obligation to keep this baby. I will not lose everything I’ve worked for because of you. You get rid of this fucking problem and get back to work. And if you tell anyone about this, I swear to God, I’ll make you pay. I will take everything you’ve worked to build away from you. And I’ll make that bitch Sarah wish she had never met you before I kill her.”
With that, he gave me one last departing kick, right to the stomach.
We pulled into Justin’s place and I had my door open before he was barely to a complete stop. I shouldn’t have let myself go back to that memory in the truck. All it did was upset me, which was exactly why I never thought about it. Ever.
I was just inside the front door when Justin grabbed my arm. Another reason I never let myself think about Colton’s attack, it made me jumpy. I screamed as I whirled around, smacking Justin in the hip with my bag.
“Jesus, Lil, just relax. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
I let my bag drop and sat on the bench in his entryway to calm my heavy breathing.
“Listen, I’m not mad AT you, I’m just….mad,” he said as he crouched down in front of me. Pausing only for a moment, he went on, “I need you to tell me what happened with this guy.”
I shook my head back and forth, trying to pull together the courage to speak. “I can’t,” I said in barely a whisper.
He squeezed my knee but pulled away. “Damn it, how do we know what to expect out of him if you don’t tell me or your brothers what the fuck happened? Look, I’ve told people to watch their back before and it didn’t mean jack shit. I was probably fightin’ them at the time, but that didn’t mean I’d go after them when it was all over. Is that something this guy would do? Come after you?”
“Possibly.” I was still whispering.
“How do you know?”
“I just do. He…..” How did I say this without telling him everything? “He can get violent,” I finished.
“Have you seen him be violent?”
I finally faced my fears and looked at him. It killed me to see the worry on his face.
“Yeah.”
Justin closed his eyes and asked through clenched teeth, “Was he violent with you?”
I stared at him as seconds ticked by. Finally, I gave him the slightest nod and then dropped my head to my hands.
“Son of a bitch, no good motherfucker, FUCK!” he roared as he picked up the wooden chair in the entryway and threw it into the kitchen. It shattered into pieces on the tile floor. His voice echoed off the walls and seemed to bounce around the room before they smacked me straight in the face.
“Please don’t yell. I know you’re mad, Justin, but I can’t handle it right now. Please,” I begged him, frantically wiping the tears and snot from my face with the back of my hand.
“I’m…..” he paused to get his emotions under control. “….sorry. I won’t yell. I need to let your Dad know about this.”
“No!” I cried. “You can’t. He can’t know. Nobody can. Ever.”
“Lil, how the fuck are we supposed to keep you safe if I can’t tell anybody?”
“I don’t know!” I screamed as the tears continued in a full stream down my cheeks. “He can’t know. My brothers can’t know. Sarah doesn’t even know. The damn Nashville police department thinks some random person broke in and assaulted me. I don’t want anybody to fucking know what he did to me!”
“Okay. Okay. Calm down,” he said, pulling me into him. He was breathing heavily and at the contact with his hard chest, I lost it once again. He wrapped his strong arms around me as I sobbed. I grabbed his shirt into my fists and let it out. I cried for all the lost years. I cried for the worry, the heartbreak, the pain and the baby.
When the tears had drained the last of my energy, Justin reached down to pick me up and carried me through the house. He set me down in his bedroom and brushed the tears from my cheeks with his thumbs. Leaning in to kiss my forehead he said, “I just need to let your Dad know that Colton is an actual threat. I won’t tell him how I know, even if he asks me. But he needs to know, Bright Eyes, so he and your brothers can come up with a plan to keep you safe, okay?”
I didn’t have the energy to respond. Justin reached into his jeans pocket and pulled out his cell phone.
“Daniel….Justin….hey, you need to talk to Alan, have him start the paperwork to get a restraining order on this guy.” He paused, looked at me and went on, “No, she didn’t tell me anything, but she’s freaked. It’s just a hunch, but I think it needs to be done. Okay. Later.” Ending the call, he threw his phone on the dresser and then proceeded to empty the rest of his pockets.
“Why don’t you get changed, honey.”
I nodded and reached for my bag, heading into the bathroom. Thankfully Justin didn’t say anything, but I didn’t want to undress in front of him. Even though he’d seen me mostly naked earlier today, it didn’t feel right after the emotional drain of the evening.
I came out of the bathroom in my oversized t-shirt that hung to my knees to see Justin already sprawled out in the bed. His chest was bare, showing off his delicious tattoo, and the sheet was pulled up to his waist. I wanted so badly to pull that sheet back to see if he had anything on under there, but I held myself back.
“Do you have a pillow and blanket I can use?” I asked.
He looked down at the empty side of the bed. “Yeah, right here, why?”
“I’ll just go sleep on the couch.” I snatched the pillow and almost made it to the door before he grabbed me around the waist and hauled me back.
“What would make you think I’m okay with you sleepin’ on my couch? Please get into bed, honey, come on.”
“No, and don’t ‘honey’ me, Justin. I know you don’t want me there. Just let me go.”
“Tell me what the fuck I did to make you think I wouldn’t want you in my bed? Are you kidding me with this shit right now?”
“Stop,” I pleaded. “Please let me go.” I felt my bottom lip quiver. I was so tired of crying.
Justin’s muscles went rock solid, yet he loosened his hold on me. I wiggled myself free and walked out the door. Somehow, I managed to hold myself together while I got comfortable and arranged my pillow just right. There was a blanket over the back of the couch I grabbed to cover my body. Thankfully, it didn’t take long to fall into a deep sleep.
Chapter 15
Ihadn’t been asleep long when I suddenly felt like I was flying through the air. My nose tingled with a familiar scent. I took a deep breath and sighed. I felt so warm and cuddly, I really needed to ask Justin where he got this fabulous blanket.
About the time I realized it wasn’t the blanket making me feel warm and cuddly, but instead it was Justin’s strong arms holding me, he laid me down on his bed.
“What are you doing?” I squeaked, blinking my eyes r
epeatedly to help awaken my remaining senses.
“You are not sleeping on the fucking couch,” he snapped.
Shit, here we go again, I thought to myself. I really did not want to get into this with him again in the middle of the night.
“I’m pretty sure I WAS sleeping,” I said with a snotty tone.
“You know what I mean.”
“Oh, yeah, I know EXACTLY what you meant,” I said, raising my voice.
He stared at me a beat and then threw his hands up in the air, letting them slam down onto his thighs. “Jesus, I cannot keep up with you. What did I do now?”
“Nothing, you made your feelings very loud and clear to me. I wouldn’t want to add another argument to your perfect….fucking….day.” As I spat the last three words at him, my voice gave way and cracked on the last one. I started to move toward the edge of the bed, hoping to get as far away from him as possible.
We both laid there a while, not saying a word. I stayed facing the opposite direction. I didn’t want him to figure out that I was more hurt than mad. If he saw my eyes he would know the truth. I felt his arm slowly stretch across my belly and pull me back against his body. I was nestled with my back to his front, but he still hadn’t said a word. He loosened his hold on my belly and moved his hand down to my hip. His fingers dug into my flesh as he leaned closer. He buried his face into the back of my hair and whispered, “I’m sorry.”
At first I didn’t know how to react. As much as I wanted to throw it in his face that sorry wasn’t good enough, and what he said earlier had hurt me more than anything, I couldn’t. My heart was turning to mush and my tummy felt all melty inside. Why did he have to sound so sexy when he apologized? Damn it. And then he went on.
“I was a dick. I didn’t mean to be, but I was. I wasn’t prepared to find out someone might want to hurt you. That, on top of the fact that I was pissed at myself for fucking you in a goddamn horse barn, and I lost my cool. I didn’t mean for it to come out like I regretted the actual act, just that….I don’t know Lil, we’re adults. I should’ve made this perfect for you….for us. And I didn’t. I pushed you against a dirty fucking wall and made it seem cheap and meaningless.”
If I was mushy and melty before, my entire body had just turned to pure liquid. I twisted in his arms to face him. The light green eyes staring into mine were filled with pain. I leaned my forehead against his and sighed.
“It’s okay, and I’m sorry too. It’s hard for me to give up control and let someone else fight my battles. I feel like I’ve been doing it all on my own for so long, but at the same time I feel like people have done everything for me and I want to have control now. I know that doesn’t make sense, but going from the celebrity life back to ‘normal’ is not an easy adjustment. I trust you…I really do, Justin. And I know you don’t regret this afternoon. I was just confused. I didn’t know what to think, or how you felt about me,” I said.
He rolled us so my back was pushed into the mattress and he rested his body partially on top of mine. His hand at my hip moved upward, over my chest and neck until he ran his fingers against my jaw and into my hair. Leaning closer, so our lips were almost touching, he whispered, “Then let me show you how I feel about you.”
As his mouth covered mine, I gasped at the contact and he slid his tongue inside. This wasn’t like this afternoon. We didn’t need to worry about getting caught by anyone. We were alone, in his house, in his bed. This was slow and sweet.
His hand went under my t-shirt and, before I knew it, the whole thing came up over my head. After tossing it on the floor, he returned to my lips. He clasped his hand in mine and held it up above my head. He kissed down my cheek, touching his tongue to the sensitive spot behind my ear. I moaned a breathy “Oh.” His tongue travelled down my neck and chest until he reached my breasts. He shifted to grab my other hand in his and guided that one up as well. With both arms above my head, I felt helpless. He kissed all around my breast, purposefully not hitting the target. My hips started to sway, reaching for some sort of friction to relieve the burn between my legs.
When his warm mouth finally covered my nipple, I arched my back to get closer to him. “Oh God, yes, just like that,” I murmured. Justin hummed a slow “Mmmm” that made my burn turn into a full blown fire.
“I want to touch you,” I said in a raspy voice.
He didn’t even look up at me, just kept worshipping my breasts, going from one to the other and back again. “No baby, first I’m gonna drive you wild.” He started trailing kisses down my stomach. My abs clenched knowing what was coming. I had never been a big fan of oral sex. Probably because all my partners were just quickies to fulfill a need. Oral sex was intimate. Private. Something you didn’t share with just anyone.
When he got to the top of my panties he stopped and looked at me. “I need to let go of your hands but keep them right where they are.” I nodded at his command. Funny how normally his bossiness would be the start of an argument, but not here. There was something about him being in charge of my body that made this so hot.
He pulled my panties down my legs and tossed them on top of my t-shirt. At first, he just stared at me. It was a little embarrassing being so exposed like that, but he didn’t make me squirm long. He leaned down and planted a soft kiss on the inside of my thigh. Then the other side. Just like with my breasts, the anticipation was killing me.
“Please, Justin,” I groaned.
“Please what, baby?”
“Touch me.” I opened my eyes and looked down my body. “Kiss me,” I whispered. He winked at me and leaned in to run his tongue through my sensitive folds. My hips jerked at the contact.
“Keep still, baby,” he said and then blew right on my center before diving back in. It didn’t take long. He had me so primed that by the time he reached his hand up and slid in two fingers I clenched around them, calling his name.
The orgasm shook my entire body, and I faintly felt him kissing his way back up my stomach as I floated down from the clouds. He stripped off his shorts and boxers and added them to our ever growing pile of clothes. Reaching for the nightstand next to my head, he opened the drawer and pulled out a condom.
He stood on his knees and sat back onto his calves as he ripped open the foil packet with his teeth. I finally had the chance to get a good look and the boy did not disappoint. He smiled as he rolled the condom into place, likely noticing that my eyes were firmly stuck staring at his manhood. He hovered over me and looked into my eyes. I let out a small gasp as he slowly entered me.
“Put your arms around me,” he whispered through his labored breaths. I instantly obliged and held him tight.
“Damn, you feel good, honey.” As he began to thrust into me over and over, I could feel the burn start to build again. In an instant, Justin sat up, carting me with him. He kept going, falling onto his back, never losing our connection. As I began to ride him, his sturdy hands smoothed over my body, kneading my breasts and gripping my hips. He reached between us and his thumb hit my sweet spot. I threw my head back and tried to catch my breath.
Damn, this felt amazing.
He felt amazing.
We felt amazing together.
“Get there, baby,” he rasped.
At that moment, the second orgasm ripped through my body. It was less of a shock than the first but still felt incredible. Justin flipped me to my back so he was on top as he pounded into me in a punishing rhythm. I opened my eyes to see his were closed tight. He shoved his face into my neck and pushed into me one last time as deep as he could go. His body jerked as he grunted, “Oh….yes….Lil,” through his release.
He let all his weight fall on top of me as I traced circles onto his bare back.
“Am I too heavy?” he asked.
“A little, but I’m okay,” I answered. He shifted to the side and rolled onto his back. He pulled the condom off, tied the end and threw it over onto our pile of clothes.
I giggled. “Gross, Justin, you need to get up and throw that in the g
arbage.”
He grinned, but never opened his eyes. “Too tired.” He turned his head to look at me as his grin turned into a full on smile. I realized at that moment it had been a lot of years since I really looked at his smile. It was mesmerizing. I leaned in and gave him a light kiss on the lips. “You okay?” he asked.
I was. It didn’t matter what Colton had done, or what he was planning to do. It didn’t matter what anyone thought of me for quitting the business. Nothing mattered at that moment. At that moment it was Justin and Lil.
“Yeah, baby,” I whispered. “I’m perfect.”
The next morning I opened my eyes to find myself alone in bed. Looking around the spacious room, I realized Mr. DeLuca had some damn fine taste. Either that or he hired a decorator. I had been to Justin’s house many times before, but only into his bedroom the night of our first date.
His bed was gigantic, a king, with a tall wooden headboard and footboard. His sheets were softer than anything I’d ever felt, and I had stayed in some pretty swanky places over the years. His comforter was a light tan with bits of dark red, green and a deep eggplant. A dresser with mirror sat off to the side, and another tall chest of drawers rested near the door. Straight through the back of the room was the master bath.
It was immaculate. Justin told me during one of our many phone conversations, while sequestered in the house from the paparazzi, about his renovations. This bathroom alone must have cost him a freaking fortune. It was all tiled, even part of the walls. In the corner sat a deep bathtub with jets. The shower rested just beside it with two large glass doors at the entrance. I licked my lips thinking about being in the shower with Justin. And the best part? There were two nozzles so no one would ever have to be cold. Yes, please.
I looked in the large mirror above the dark granite countertop and jumped at the sight. Holy Hell. I hope Justin slid out of bed and didn’t get a good look at me this morning. My mascara was smudged and halfway down my cheeks. And not only did I have that going for me, but my crazy sex hair made me look like something out of an Eighty’s rock video. Yes, I was your modern day female version of Alice Cooper. Yikes.