by Diana Palmer
“See you later,” he said, keeping his tone uniform with the gesture. “Take care of her, Mr. Steel,” he added with a curt smile.
“Goodbye, Ralley,” Nikki said, her glowing eyes promising retribution at the earliest opportunity. “Thanks for all your help.”
Ralley ignored the sarcasm. No way was he going to let that big-shot outsider swipe his girl. He’d seen Nikki first, and he wasn’t giving her up. He didn’t plan to let her slip through his fingers this time. He’d been a fool to let her go, but Leda’s charms had blinded him. He was older now, and wiser, and he wasn’t going to hand Nikki over to some expensive stranger. She couldn’t be serious about that big man, anyway; God knew he was years older than she was. Mike had mentioned something about him being a tycoon, but Ralley was skeptical. After all the guy could have been pretending. But even if he did have all that money, it wouldn’t take the place of love. Nikki still loved him, he told himself smugly. All he had to do was prove it to her. He walked back into his office whistling.
* * *
“ARE YOU GOING to ignore me for the rest of the day?” Nikki asked as she and Cal sat down alone to a small lunch.
Cal glanced at her, dark-eyed and unapproachable, over his coffee cup. He’d been pleasant enough since that visit to the office, but it was all on the surface.
Cal was just as remote as he’d been on the drive home, and she wondered if a sledgehammer would dent him.
“I won’t be here for the rest of the day,” he said quietly.
“You’re leaving?” she asked, her eyes wincing, her disappointment almost a physical ache.
“I’m a businessman. I’ve got too many irons in the fire to stay here.” He finished his coffee.
She’d noticed that he’d changed into a beige suit, with a matching tie, that he was dressed for travel, not recreation. But she hadn’t wanted to believe it. Now she had to.
She wasn’t sure, but she thought she knew the reason he was leaving. If she was wrong, it was going to be horribly embarrassing. But if she wasn’t, she’d have been a fool to keep quiet.
She laid her napkin beside her plate and drew in a steadying breath. “I am not having an affair with Ralley Hall,” she said quietly. “I am not involved with him in any way. I can’t explain why he put on that show for you, but that’s all it was. A show.”
“That isn’t what he told me,” he replied curtly, and his eyes were cold.
She frowned slightly. “But he didn’t talk to you...”
He put down his own napkin and stood up. “I called him while you were fixing lunch.” He shot back the cuff of his shirt and checked his watch. “I won’t be able to wait until your aunt gets back from her shopping trip. Tell her I appreciate her hospitality very much. I’ve already thanked your uncle and phoned for a cab to take me to the airport.”
She caught his arm hesitantly. “Cal, what did he tell you?” she asked, fearing the worst.
He looked down at her with the cruelest expression she’d ever seen. “Come on, honey, don’t give me that. No wonder your conscience bothered you about your friend. Did she know you were seeing her husband behind her back?”
Her heart fell over in her chest. Ralley had told him that! How could he, how could he!
“It’s not true!” she burst out, horrified. “Cal, you’ve got to believe me!”
He removed her hand from his jacket, gently but firmly. “I don’t know what to believe anymore.” His dark eyes searched her face narrowly. “You wanted him before he married your friend. You loved him, you said. Well, nothing’s changed except that she’s dead and he’s free.”
Nothing? she wanted to say. Everything had changed. And it hadn’t been love she’d felt for Ralley—she knew that now for certain. It hadn’t torn her heart out by its roots when Ralley had left; it had only hurt her pride. What she was feeling now made that remembered agony less painful than a pinch. Losing Cal was a little like dying. She didn’t know how she was going to breathe when he was gone.
“Why won’t you believe me?” she asked sadly. “Is it because you don’t want to? Does it give you an excuse to keep from getting involved? You didn’t have to worry about that. I wasn’t going to try to trap you.” She turned away and sat back down at the table. “I learned a long time ago that you can’t make people want to be with you, any more than you can force them to love you.” Her fingers reached for the half-full cup of coffee in front of her; she swallowed it down quickly and got to her feet, dabbing at her mouth with her napkin. “It was nice to see you again. If you’ll excuse me, I’m already late for work.”
She didn’t look at him as she went out the door, hiding the tears that threatened to spill over onto her pale cheeks. Neither of them said a word about work, although they both knew Mike had told her she didn’t have to come in.
As she drove with determined calmness down the driveway, she didn’t even look back. She was hurting too much.
Ralley looked up sharply when she walked into his office and slammed the door behind her, shutting them off from the rest of the staff.
“Why?” she asked venomously. Her eyes were still red from the tears; her voice shook with controlled fury.
He knew what she meant. He got up from behind the desk with a conciliatory smile on his handsome face. “Now, honey, don’t get all up in the air. He’s an old guy, much too old for you.”
“Is that what you told him?” she asked.
“Sure. It was the truth,” he said defensively. He approached her, but she backed away, her eyes openly hating him.
“What else did you tell him?” she persisted.
He stopped, leaning his back against the desk, not so confident now. “That you loved me,” he said hesitantly. “You do, don’t you? You always did, even when I married Leda. I knew it. Nikki, I missed you,” he said softly, leaning toward her. “Leda was a lovely girl, a sweet girl. But she wasn’t you. If I’d just kept my head and waited, it would have blown over. We’d have got married...”
“And made each other miserable for the rest of our lives,” she finished for him, certainty in her pale green eyes as they cut into his. “I was infatuated with you. God help me, I’d probably have gone through with the wedding if you hadn’t eloped with Leda. But it’s all over, Ralley. You’re beating a dead horse. It’s too late.”
His lower lip protruded. “You’re just upset,” he said soothingly. “But you’ll get over it,” he added smugly, smiling at her before he went back to sit at his desk. “When you’re calmer, we’ll talk some more. You haven’t got over me yet, Nikki. I’ll show you.”
“The only thing I want to see is your back walking away,” she grumbled.
“Don’t pretend you cared about the big man,” he said sarcastically. “Maybe he had a fat wallet, but he was years too old for you. Besides,” he added shrewdly, “what would a man like that want with a small-town girl like you? Maybe you were a novelty for a while, but you wouldn’t fit into his kind of society and you know it.”
She did, and it cut like a double-sharpened knife. She turned around and walked out of the office without bothering to reply. There was nothing she could say, anyway.
For the next week Ralley did everything but sit on her doorstep and play a flute to get her attention. He followed her to the local drugstore at lunch and sat with her until she started going home in desperation. She couldn’t seem to move without bumping into him. When she heard the phone ring at night, she knew before she answered that it was Ralley with another invitation. He’d invited her out every night since Cal left, and she’d turned him down every time. She was too raw inside at what he’d done to want his company again, ever. But Ralley was persistent. It was what made him a good reporter. He never gave up.
“You’re looking pale,” Jenny remarked gently one day over a ham sandwich. She’d served it on the patio with the remark that Nikki needed some fresh air.
> “It’s from running,” she replied lightly. “Ralley thinks he can get me back if he’s persistent enough.”
Jenny watched her closely while she bit into her sandwich. “Can he?” she murmured.
Nikki shook her head. She stared into her cup of black coffee, leaving all but one bite of the sandwich on her plate untouched. “I told him it was over, but he wouldn’t believe me.”
“What, exactly, did he tell Mr. Steel?” Jenny asked after a minute. “You haven’t talked about it, and I haven’t asked. But it’s going to explode inside you if you don’t let it out.”
“I don’t know all of it,” she admitted bitterly. “He told him he was too old for me, and that I’d been seeing Ralley while Leda was alive, too, apparently.”
Jenny ruffled indignantly. “Why didn’t you tell Mike? He’d have thrown him out the door!”
“That’s why,” came the dry reply. “Ralley’s a good reporter, Jenny. He only wants me because I’m not available. That was why he chased me the first time, years ago.” She laughed softly. “Funny, I didn’t like him at first. Now I don’t like him at all.” Her face fell. “Cal wouldn’t believe me when I told him Ralley was lying.”
“Then maybe he cared more than you knew,” Jenny murmured. “He’ll be back, honey. Just calm down.”
“He won’t be back.” Nikki got to her feet. “Thanks for the sandwich. I’ve got to cover an emergency services meeting at city hall, then I’ll be at the office.”
Jenny only nodded, watching her niece walk stiffly away.
But being calmer didn’t help to sort anything out. As the days went by, she found herself under siege again by Ralley, who seemed more determined than ever to get her back. She didn’t flatter herself that it was love causing his acquisitive spurts. Ralley simply had a dogged determination to obtain anything that resisted him. It made him a good reporter—but a nagging suitor.
“I’m afraid to sit in the living room,” she wailed to Jenny as they sat by the pool. “I expect to find him leering at me from behind the potted plant!”
“Won’t give up, huh?” her aunt teased.
Nikki leaned forward, propping her chin on her hands. “Never. I’m so tired of dodging him. I seem to have done little else since I came back from Nassau.” She laughed mirthlessly. “Funny, isn’t it? There was a time, when he was sneaking around to see Leda, that I’d have given anything to make him care. And now it doesn’t matter at all.”
“Because now you’re in love with someone else,” came the wise reply.
She nodded. “Desperately,” she admitted with a wan smile. “The question is, where do I go from here? I’m not kidding myself that Cal will ever want to marry me. He and I move in different circles, and he’s told me himself that the thought of having another child terrifies him. He doesn’t even want a commitment. He told me so.” Her eyes clouded. “He hasn’t even called me.”
“You said he was going to be up to his ears in meetings,” Jenny reminded her.
She laughed bitterly. “And that shows you the place I occupy in his thoughts, doesn’t it? I’m not even as important as a board meeting. Do you know he walked out of a board meeting in the middle of a proxy fight to take his daughter to a birthday party?” she asked her aunt.
“It sounds like something he’d do,” Jenny replied, smiling. “And remember, he came quite a long way to spend a day with you.”
“But that was before...” She turned away. “It doesn’t matter.”
“I don’t want to raise your hopes too high, my darling,” the older woman said gently. “But he had the look of a man deeply in love.”
Nikki sighed. “But, then, so did Ralley...once,” she reminded Jenny with a faint smile. And before the subject had the chance to come around again, she got Jenny off on recipes.
Friday finally came. Her birthday, and Nikki had been nervous all day, wondering if Cal would remember his promise to take her to New Orleans. Mike had given her the afternoon off, swearing that she was of no damn use in the office except for wearing ruts in his floor. Ralley had overheard the conversation, and Nikki had the oddest feeling that he was up to something. But of course, he wouldn’t have the opportunity to disrupt her plans again. She’d see to that.
Jenny had gone to visit friends, and Mike had to drive to Atlanta for a conference on an editing workshop he was helping with, so Nikki had the house to herself. In a way that was worse than having it full of people. She dressed in a two-piece white knit suit that showed her tan off to advantage and white strappy sandals. Then she paced the floor and bit her lip, eyeing the clock every few minutes and wondering.
Cal had said that they belonged to each other. But wasn’t that pretty much what a man said when he’d been with a woman for the first time? He hadn’t wanted the relationship to get that involved; he’d said so often enough. But he’d given in to his own hunger, and perhaps it was guilt that had caused his remarks. He’d been the first, and he knew it, and he was sometimes pretty old-fashioned in his outlook. He might be permissive, but he still harbored feelings of responsibility, and it wasn’t inconceivable that he could be that way about Nikki.
She stared at the clock again. It was only ten minutes until five. If he was coming, he’d be there on time. Cal was nothing if not punctual.
Only ten more minutes and she’d see him again. Maybe only five more minutes. Her heart quivered madly in her taut body. It seemed like years since she’d seen him, held him. Centuries! It didn’t matter if he didn’t love her, as long as she could be with him for even a few minutes, see him, touch him. Oh God, she loved him so!
A sound caught her attention and she froze in the middle of the room. It was a car coming up the driveway. It was Cal!
She ran for the door as the car pulled up at the steps and she peered blindly through the curtains, trying to see through the layers of gauzy fabric...
She gave up and opened the door just as a tall man bounded up the steps. Her heart sank. It was only Ralley.
“What are you doing here!” she burst out.
“I’ve got to pick up something for Mike—if you don’t mind,” he added sarcastically.
“Oh, all right, but will you please hurry?” she ground out, peering around him toward the deserted driveway.
He went into the study and ruffled through some papers on the desk. His narrowed eyes studied her quickly.
“Uh, it sure is hot out there,” he murmured, tossing her a brief glance. “Do you think I could have a small glass of wine—just to take off the top layer of heat?”
“Ralley...!”
“I know Mike keeps a bottle of port chilled.” He grinned. “Come on, Nikki, have pity on a poor, hot reporter.”
“All right, but just one glass,” she muttered, running for the kitchen. “I’m going out.”
He murmured something, but she didn’t stay around long enough to hear it.
Her ears strained for the sound of a car as she poured him a glass of the chilled port from the refrigerator and raced back to the study to hand it to him.
“Umm,” he murmured, sipping it. “That’s delicious. Thanks, Nikki.”
She was literally wringing her hands. Why didn’t he go? The sound of a car caught her attention.
“It’s Cal!” she burst out. But as she moved, so did Ralley, and seconds later, the port was all down the front of her white knit suit.
“Oh, Nikki, I’m so sorry!” he burst out, grabbing a handkerchief from his pocket. “Here...”
“That won’t do, you idiot, I’ve got to change!” She couldn’t let Cal see her like this! “Ralley, tell Cal I’ll be right down!” she told him, and dashed up the stairs.
The minute she was out of sight, Ralley began to take off his clothes. By the time the doorbell rang, he was down to his briefs. He walked calmly to the door, with the wineglass still in his hand, ruffling his hair in the pr
ocess. He wiped the smile off his lips just as he jerked the door open.
Cal, dressed in dark evening clothes with a shirt that probably cost more than Ralley’s entire wardrobe, seemed to implode at the sight of the younger man.
“Where’s Nikki?” he asked in a deep, softly dangerous tone.
“Upstairs, waiting for me, of course,” Ralley drawled, lifting the empty glass. “She’ll be sorry she missed you...”
“Cal!”
They both turned as Nikki gaped helplessly at the tableau below, dressed in nothing but her slip, the dark stain of the wine just faintly visible where it had seeped through. Her face contorted in something like agony. What Cal obviously believed was in his taut expression and she saw immediately that it was going to be useless to plead her case. Ralley smiled insolently, and Nikki wanted to strangle him with her bare hands.
“Hello, darling, look who’s here.” Ralley laughed.
Cal’s huge fists clenched at his side. He didn’t say a word to Nikki, but his dark eyes spoke volumes. He turned to Ralley and with a move so quick that Nikki missed it, he threw a shattering punch at the younger man. Ralley didn’t have time to dodge it. It caught him square on the jaw and sent him sprawling sideways on the polished wood floor.
Cal’s blazing eyes went from the fallen, groaning man on the floor to Nikki, frozen on the staircase.
“Excuse me for breaking up the party,” he said in a voice that dripped ice water. “I thought we had a date, but obviously I was mistaken.”
He spared Ralley a final, contemptuous glance before he opened the door and stormed out.
Tears bled down Nikki’s pale cheeks. She couldn’t remember a time in her life when she’d hurt as much.
Ralley dragged himself to his feet, gingerly touching his jaw. “He’s got a punch like a mule,” he groaned.
Nikki only stared at him, hurting like she’d never hurt before.
Belatedly he looked up and saw her face. He stood there, watching her with eyes in which comprehension began to shine. “You really love him, don’t you?” he asked quietly.