by Charity B.
“Since it seems the Apostle is attending other matters at present, I will be reading the scriptures.”
I slowly open my eyes to watch Jacob walk next to Doc Kilmer and crouch over to inspect his work. The Doc thrusts the needle through— my humiliation and pain dancing together with each tug of the thread.
The tightness becomes more intense, and I scream with every puncture of the needle. I’m almost grateful when Jacob stands to read the scriptures for something else to focus on.
“Laurel Ann Johnson, you were found participating in obscene acts of a sexual nature with a man who was not your husband. The fact that the man you seduced was none other than the Prophet leads me to believe that your time in the tomb of abolishment was not entirely successful. Do you deny these charges?”
Doc Kilmer stabs the needle in again, causing me to yell out my answer. “No, Counselor!”
“These are serious offenses. To remain in the Anointed Land, you must atone for them. You are to remain closed during your time of questioning as well as for the duration of your cleansing.” I nod, and Doc Kilmer yanks me even more tightly shut, causing me to suck in through my teeth. Jacob clears his throat, and opens The True Testament to a bookmarked page. “‘There is no place for lust in the Anointed Land. Lust is a breeding ground for evil, and it must be snuffed out. While both parties must pay penance, those whose bodies are entered are the seducers and therefore must be prevented from further seduction. The orifice which was used in a sexual manner must be sewn closed with needle and thread until their souls are purified of all prior sin, through a cleansing ritual.’” He turns the page and continues as steady tears flow down my face. I don’t know how many more times I can handle the needle piercing my tender skin before I pass out. “‘Adultery is among the most selfish of sins. It is the destroyer of our families and an enemy of Zaaron. The cleansing for those committing such acts shall be extreme in nature to ensure the sin is not recommitted. If the seducer exceeds three offenses, the closing shall remain permanent.’ -23:10A through C.” He shuts The True Testament.
Doc Kilmer ties off the thread, and I nearly die from relief. I cry as he presses a cloth against my freshly sewn entrance, even the simplest touch sending pain through my veins, raising my body temperature. He stands with the blood speckled cloth and pushes his glasses up his nose. Holding his hand out, he takes the clear bottle bottle from Sister Madeline. As he pours it over my fresh puncture wounds, it burns so badly that I sob and contest my bindings.
“The procedure is finished, Counselor.”
Jacob glares at me and snarls, “Leave me with her.” Sister Madeline pats my hand, following Doc Kilmer out of the clinic. My breathing is harsh with my attempt to control the pain. Once they are gone, Jacob sits where the Doc had, reaching between my thighs. “Let’s see how well of a job the good Doc did.” He spreads my lips apart, and his finger pushes on the thread. I cry at the shock as he attempts to stick his finger in between the tight string, pulling on the fresh wounds. “Satisfactory,” he states, standing to put his hands on my knees. “You have caused my family and this compound nothing but suffering. You’re so fond of opening your legs, why don’t you open them for me, bitch?” Pushing down on my thighs, I scream at the threading being pulled to its limit. At the very moment I think he’s going to tear me apart, he releases me, and I gasp for air through my tears. He unfastens my legs along with my right wrist. “Get up and cover your whore hole.”
Sniffling, I undo my other wrist and the belt around my torso. On shaky legs, I stand to retrieve my bloomers from the bed. Jacob reaches into his pocket, pulling out a rope to bind my hands together.
I want to know what they’ve done to Zeb. I wish it was Ezekiel here instead of Jacob whom I don’t dare ask. He drags me through the medical hall as Sister Madeline gives me a sorrowful look. When he leads me through the front door, I don’t see Mia or Marybeth among the crowd of followers yelling.
“Evil!”
“Adulteress!”
“Devil’s whore!”
“Seductress!”
They cast stones, hitting my legs and my back until one hits my head causing it to ring. My vision falters, and I lose my footing, falling to the dirt. Jacob yanks me back to my feet when a rock hits him in the face, and he yells, “Enough! You will all be called on shortly. Go back to your duties!”
They obey but do not lower their voices as he pulls me to the tabernacle.
“She must still be possessed to be able to seduce the Prophet.”
“Poor Sister Mia. Her own kin!”
“She’s always had a rebellious spirit.”
I try to keep up with him though it’s futile, and I still trip. Upon entering the foyer, I search for Zebadiah. Part of me hopes he disgraced my name because there’s no reason we should both suffer.
I’ll admit to what they accuse me of, and I’ll pay the price. If Zeb confesses to wanting me and loving me, everything will fall apart. I never considered that I was risking the foundation of the entire compound by following my fleshly desires. A Prophet has never been accused of such acts. I don’t know what will happen to him if they are aware that he knowingly rebuked Zaaron’s will by touching me.
Jacob drags me across the stage and into the back hall. Opening the door to the holding room next to the one we were caught in, he shoves me inside and unties my wrists.
“You will stay here until your cleansing,” he informs me before slamming the door.
The room spins around me, making my stomach roll with nausea, I stumble to the bed to lie down. The moment my head hits the pillow, I weep into it.
ZEKE FOLLOWS ME INTO MY office, standing in front of my desk. His arms are crossed, curiosity and rage fighting for his expression. I reach for the box containing the notebooks and become hesitant. If the tables were turned, what would it be like to hear this from Zeke? I’m literally about to tear his world down. My hands shake as I place the box on the desk and lift the lid.
“Enough with the suspense. Just tell me what you’re talking about.”
“Will you at least sit?”
He huffs and rolls his eyes while doing what I ask. I push the box over to him. “You won’t believe me if I tell you. You need to see for yourself.”
His eyebrow arches, and he reaches inside to pull out the first notebook. As his eyes scan the words, confusion controls his features. I don’t see his chest rise a single time until the realization hits and a sob escapes.
“This is…there has to be an explanation. This is certainly fraudulent…” His voice cracks on the verge of producing tears. “It has to be…”
My chest aches as I shake my head. Everything inside me wishes that could be true. “Keep reading. It’s all there. It’s no fraud.”
I watch him learn of every lie we were born being told. Tears fall from his eyes, and it kills me to see my brother cry. He’s tough. He always has been, and it’s unsettling to see him break.
“He knew…” His eyes are furious as he meets my eyes. “The bastard knew.”
“Father, Grandfather Josiah, their fathers and grandfathers. They all knew.”
He throws the last notebook across the desk. “Why?! What was the point of it all?”
I chuckle, but not because it’s funny. “Power, control, vanity…the very things they preached against.”
“What do we do now?”
Now that I’ve proven to him what I intended, my urgency returns, and I stand. “We go get Laurel Ann.”
He leans forward, ripping off his hat. “Are you mad? You’ll make things worse for both of you if you attempt that right now. As far as the followers know, you have been seduced by a whore of the Devil.” Hearing Laurel Ann mentioned in that way makes my skin so hot it’s nearly numb. “If you get caught, they’ll hang you up at the cleansing station. Our best bet is to release the books.”
The thought has most certainly crossed my mind, though I know the power of numbers and blind faith.
“There’s no telling
the direction that would go. We are telling them Zaaron isn’t our God, that he isn’t a God at all. We are rebuking everything we were taught as truth. You can’t expect that to be taken well.”
“Then what?”
“We have to end this.”
At this point, I have no idea what would be the right or wrong way to deal with this. I have to follow my mind, heart, and instincts because I have nothing else anymore.
“What does that mean?” His hand hits the armrest, clearly exasperated by my vagueness.
I rest my forearms on my desk, wondering if he will try to stop me. “I need you to take me into town.”
Frowning, he walks to my office door, rage in his fists and loss in his shoulders. “Let me fetch the buggy.”
I gather the notebooks as he leaves, locking them back in the box and placing the key in my pocket. I yank off my sigil pendant, tossing it on the desk before opening the bottom drawer and shoving the bloody piece of Laurel Ann’s old garment in my pocket. I look out the back window to see Ezekiel pulling up behind the tabernacle with the horse and buggy.
Running across the meeting hall to the foyer, I take a deep breath and open the door to peer outside. The followers seem to have gone back to their daily duties, so I slip down the steps with urgency, gliding between the tabernacle and schoolhouse. Once I’m out of sight from the common ground, I run to meet Zeke. I jump in the back of the buggy, lying down to be hidden.
Moments later, I hear my cousin who guards the gates. “Apostle, you’re leaving now? With everything happening?”
“That is why I am leaving, to deal with the Philistine who came here making his ridiculous claims.”
Very clever excuse. I’m proud of him for thinking of that.
“Of course, Apostle.”
The creaking of the gate opening allows the oxygen to release from my lungs as the buggy moves again.
After a few moments, Zeke calls to me. “You can sit up here now.” I climb over the seats when he asks, “Where are we going?”
“To the only Philistine that I halfway trust.”
Once I say it, I realize she isn’t a Philistine. None of them are. Their ancestors just didn’t believe the lies. Although I know this, it’s difficult for me to shift my way of thinking. The first encounter I had with this girl was less than friendly. I just hope she loves Laurel Ann as much as she claims to.
We enter Hobart, and if Zeke doubts me, he isn’t saying so. I direct him through town to Laurel Ann’s old street, pointing at her house when we approach.
“Here.”
Zeke tightens the reins, stopping the horses. “Whatever you’re planning…are you certain of it?”
I shake my head as I jump from the buggy. “No.”
His nostrils flare, but he follows me through the yard and onto the porch. We look at each other, and I raise my fist to knock.
“Ugh! Are you serious?!” We hear who I assume is Kaila, Laurel Ann’s friend, from inside the house. After some stomping footsteps the door swings open. “What?” She’s glistening with sweat, and her hair has curls escaping around her face. What disturbs me is her state of dress. She’s in nothing besides her undergarments which are considerably more revealing than those worn on the compound. While I jerk my head to the side, Zeke’s eyes don’t stop traveling up and down her body. I hit him in the arm to get him to stop violating her with his stare. “Oh, isn’t this a fucktastic surprise. What the hell are you doing here?” She crosses her arms until her eyes narrow in realization. “I swear to God, and not yours, there better not be anything wrong with Laurel Ann.”
I try to look at her without actually seeing her outfit. “Would you mind getting dressed for this conversation?”
“These are my workout clothes, Prophet McPrude, and I’ll wear whatever the hell I want.”
Zeke snorts, and I glare at him. “Fine. May we come in? This is of a sensitive nature.”
She glances between us, sighing and gestures into the home. “All right.” We walk inside, taking off our hats as she leads us into the main living area. “First things first, is Laurel Ann okay?”
Being closed will be painful and cause her much suffering, though she will heal from it, so I give her the answer that is both somewhat honest and will get her to listen.
“Yes, Laurel Ann will be fine.”
She grabs a towel off a table and plops on the couch to dry herself. “What’s up then?”
I sit in a chair and glance at her television screen. It has a picture of a woman dressed similarly to Kaila, frozen in mid movement. Zeke sits in the blue chair next to me as I take a deep breath.
“I don’t know how much Laurel Ann told you about where we’re from. We were raised with a specific belief system and laws to follow.” I hand her the box and remove the skeleton key from my pocket. “I recently found this.” She takes the box and key with a raised eyebrow. “It’s documentation that everything we’ve been taught were the lies of a vain man. I don’t know much about your laws, but girls younger than your ‘age of consent’ are being bound and impregnated by men many times their age. Our rituals are abusive and extreme.”
“I’m waiting for the part I don’t already know.” Kaila reaches over to a small table, placing the box on top before putting a cigarette stick in her mouth and lighting it with her pocket-sized torch.
She may not necessarily be evil, but she’s definitely insolent.
“I thought what we were doing was right, what was asked of us by an all-powerful God. Now that I know what I know, I can’t allow what’s happening in the compound to continue. If you go to your authorities to tell them about the children, will they stop it?”
Her eyes go wide as she blows out smoke like a demon. “Oh, they’ll stop it. They’ll raid the place. They’ll take the children and probably arrest a bunch of you.”
“Zebadiah,” Zeke snaps. “What are you doing? They’re innocent.”
She tilts her head in agreement as she points her cigarette to Zeke. “Sexy suspenders over there is right. Why don’t you show them this? Give them a chance to make the right choice.”
The truth is, I know what she’s saying is the kind thing to do. I also know how stubborn the followers can be. There are passages in The True Testament mentioning circumstances where death by stoning is done in place of excommunication for fear of this very thing. This definitely falls in the category of ‘Denying the existence of Zaaron.’ It hasn’t happened in my lifetime, but if that is the choice of the compound, it’ll be too late to stop it. Then what would they do to Laurel Ann? Blame would surely be placed on her. I shake my head. I’m done allowing her to be put in harm’s way.
“It’s time we pay for our sins and the sins of our fathers. Every part of me feels that this is the correct path, and that’s all I have to go on now.”
Ezekiel’s face hardens as he nods. “You may no longer be my Prophet, but you’re my brother, and I will always trust you.”
I look back to Kaila, who has what I reluctantly admit is a sweet smile on her face. I dig into my pocket, holding out the piece of Laurel Ann’s bloomers. “One last thing.” Her eyes widen in disgust.
“Holy shit, psycho, is that blood?!”
“This is more of a personal nature. I don’t know what will happen to any of us when all this occurs, and I would like to know this is being kept somewhere safe. Can I trust you to hang on to it for me?”
Her nose scrunches as if smelling something foul. “What is it?”
I unconsciously turn to Zeke, embarrassed to be saying this in front of him. He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. Raising his eyebrows, he holds his hand out for me to continue.
I sigh and fondle the fabric in my hand “When Laurel Ann got her first blood, I helped her hide the stained undergarments. We were caught, and our penance was her binding to my father. I snuck into his study and saved this piece of her bloomers. It was all I had of her for years.”
Her expression softens into one similar to the one my
sisters have every time they see any kind of baby animal. “That’s actually sorta sweet in a really creepy, stalkery kind of way.” She stands up with her cigarette in her mouth. “There’s still no way I’m touching that shit. I’m gonna grab a Ziploc.”
She disappears into the kitchen, and when I glance at Zeke, he’s staring at her barely covered ass.
“Enjoying the view, brother?”
He chuckles, rubbing his neck and looking around the house. Kaila returns with a clear, slick bag, and tosses it to me. “Put it in there, and I’ll keep it for you.”
“Thank you.” I take a deep breath as I put it inside and hand it back to her.
Sliding her fingers across the top of the bag, she walks to a desk against the wall, opens the top drawer, and places the bag at the bottom beneath a stack of papers.
“So, when am I doing this?”
My heart picks up pace at the reality of her question, and I stand. “Immediately if possible. While Laurel Ann’s life is not in any danger, more harm will come to her if you don’t hurry.”
Her mouth drops open. “You’re just now telling me this, you dick?”
I swallow her disrespect because it’s not exactly unwarranted. “I needed you to listen.”
She spins around to grab the box and key. Storming across the room, she picks up a yellow bag from the floor by the foot rest.
“Well, I listened, now I’m going to get my friend back.” She opens her front door, pulling her bag straps over her shoulder. “Whatever you’re gonna do, you better do it quick.”
I follow Ezekiel out the front door as I nod at Kaila. “Thank you. For this and for always being a friend to Laurel Ann.”