by K. Renee
“I see the look on your face. It’s the same look you had when I walked out the door. The look you gave me when I told you I was done.” Her hands are clenching at her sides and I just stare at her. She’s pissed, but she isn’t letting me have it.
“What happened to the woman you used to be?” I ask. I’m honestly curious. The woman I fell in love with was feisty and never backed down from a fight. She went after what she wanted, and she gave everyone hell when she didn’t get her way.
“I grew up!” she spits at me. “Someone had to. In case you forgot, someone has to be the parent and raise those two kids inside. We all know that it isn’t going to be you.” She pokes her finger into my chest, and I narrow my eyes at her.
“You didn’t fuckin’ grow up. Hell, girl, you’ve been grown since I met you. You’re almost timid and shy now. What the fuck happened?” She flinches away and turns to walk away. “Don’t fuckin’ walk away,” I grit out, grabbing her arm. I spin her to face me and her eyes flash almost in fear.
I soften my voice and wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her body closer to mine. “Baby, please tell me what the fuck is going on.”
She sucks in a breath and I ready myself for whatever blow she’s about to deliver. “I can’t let you kill him.” A tear trails down her cheek and before I can ask her why, she continues. “While you were gone, I dropped the kids off with Harlyn for the afternoon while I went to run some errands. I was walking downtown when someone grabbed me from behind. A hand went over my mouth, and I tried to fight him, but I was not strong enough. Before he could pull me into the empty alley, Ro was there. He saved me from getting raped… or worse.” More tears are falling down her face now, and I look over her shoulder towards the street.
“He saved me and, if I don’t protect him now, I’ll regret it.” Her lip trembles and the only thing I can do it pull her closer to me. As much as I hate that he was the one to save her, I’m thankful he did. Who the fuck knows what would have happened if he hadn’t been there? I feel her shuddered breaths and I can’t help but tighten my grip on her.
Losing her forever will be my downfall. I may be a bastard, but she is nothing short of an angel. She’s the pure where I’m the evil. She saved me.
She brought me back from the shitty life I was leading before her. Trix is the first woman to make me feel again even after I shut myself down to the thought of it. I never wanted to find someone else. Shit, I didn’t even want Tina. My hand mindlessly runs up and down her back and the only thing I can do is imagine what happened to her that day. A million scenarios run through my head and I keep coming back to the same thing: I could have lost her.
I wasn’t here to protect her like I should have been. Instead, I was in prison and I bet that Romeo had something to do with it. He knew he lost her the day the results came in. We all knew it, and I’m sure it fuckin’ killed him to know that she was still mine even after everything I’ve put her through.
Do I deserve her? Fuck, no. Do I want to do right by her? Yeah. I would do anything to make up for that shit in the past up. She deserves the fuckin’ world, and I’m going to be the man to give it to her. I don’t give a fuck if that makes me a selfish bastard. I can’t live without her. She can be pissed at me, and hate me all she wants, but she will never be anyone else’s.
Two and a half years ago
“I fucking hate you!” Trix yells at me, as she’s pulling her dress back on. I ignore her words and get off the bed. When she walks past me again, I grab her around the waist and pull her into my body. “Let me fucking go. You’re a goddamn pig.” She shakes her head at me, and I just hold her tighter.
“You know, I ain’t letting you go. You fight me all you want, but this shit doesn’t change. I piss you off and you bitch at me.” She huffs at me and I just wait her out.
“You lied. You promised me and look what that got me.” She frowns, and I release my grip on her slightly. “You said you were getting divorced. You promised.” A tear slides down her cheek, and I use my thumb to wipe it away. “Slowly, you are breaking me. You have no idea how much it hurts to have the man you’re in love with promise you something and for him to change his mind.”
I feel my heart constrict at her words, but I don’t let me emotions show. She doesn’t know how much this shit affects me, too. I had every intention of divorcing Tina.
“It’s not that fucki’g simple, Trixie,” I growl. She pushes at my chest, causing me to tighten my grip again.
“Yes it is!” she screams at me. She finally gets out of my grip and grabs her bag off the floor. When she gets the door open, I wrap my arm around her waist and haul her back into my body, slamming the door closed.
I spin her around and push her against the wall. “Don’t,” I warn her. Her face turns into a scowl and she leans forward and bites me. I use my body to push hers into the wall harder and she gives me a dirty look. My hand goes to her throat, but I barely put any pressure on it. I would never hurt her, even if she pissed me off.
Her eyes flash with a look that I haven’t seen in a while and it turns me on. Fuck. It’s a cross between lust and anger. I love when she puts up a fight. She is feisty, and loves to give it to me just as good as I give it to her.
“She isn’t going to let me divorce her. She threatened to kill herself if I file the papers. I don’t want that shit on your conscience. Me, I don’t give a fuck if she does it. I know that it will affect you in a different way than it would me. I can deal with that shit, but I don’t think you can.” She stops struggling against me, and her eyes flash to something I’ve never seen.
“Is it because you don’t think I’m strong enough, or that you’re only trying to protect me?” Her eyes are boring into me and I just give her the truth.
“Both.” Her eyes soften slightly and she puts her hands on my biceps. Her lips find mine, and I wrap an arm around her waist and crush her body to mine. My hands go under her ass and I lift her up. Her legs wrap around my waist and I move us from the wall. “I will always do everything I can to protect you,” I whisper against her lips.
I lay her on the bed and my eyes scan over her face. She doesn’t look nearly as pissed as before, but that can all change in the matter of minutes.
“I’ll never get all of you, will I?” she finally asks. I have to take a deep breath before I say anything to her.
“You have the important part of me.” I grab her hand and put it on my chest. Her eyes follow her hand, and she stares at both of our hands on my heart.
“I wish I had all of you.” Her voice breaks and so does my barely beating heart.
“I won’t hurt you.” I lean down and kiss the side of her jaw. I watch her throat as she swallows, and her next question makes me realize how shitty I’ve been to her over the last year.
“How do I know you are being truthful? You cheated on your wife with me. How do I know that you aren’t going to start sleeping with someone else, too?” I look her in the eyes for a few seconds before I answer her. I want to get a read on her, but I can’t. She has a perfect mask hiding her expressions, and I wish I could tell what she was thinking.
“No other bitch comes close to you. I wouldn’t have made you that promise if I didn’t mean it. You will get all of me one day. You calm me down, you piss me off, and you make me fuckin’ crazier than anyone else. I will kill for you.”
Her next words are what turn my whole fuckin’ life upside down.
“I need to tell you something…” She trails off and I just stare at her. I wait for her to tell me whatever it is. She cups my cheek, almost like she’s afraid of losing me.
“I’m… pregnant.”
I pull back almost like I’ve been burned. There is no fucking way that I could be this kid’s father. Fuck. She’s been fuckin’ the other brothers still. Shit. Goddammit. I get off the bed and pull my jeans on. I pull on a shirt and my boots, making my way towards the bar. When I get outside of my room, I put my fist through the damn wall. I can hear her squeak throug
h the open doorway, but I don’t stop. I just keep moving. I grab a bottle of Jim Beam, and down a few big gulps, before I slam it on the bar. Closing my eyes, I rub my fingers into my eyes and wait for the betrayal to subside. She fuckin’ promised that she was done with the rest of the men.
Fuck this shit. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I spend the next few hours riding around mindlessly. The only thing I can think of is her and that she is pregnant. There is no way that kid can be mine. I made sure I couldn’t have kids when I was eighteen. When I finally cool off enough to talk to her, I make my way towards her apartment. When I park my bike, I see her looking through the window at me. I shut off the engine and put my kickstand down. Before I make the trek to her door, I decide that I still want her in my life in whatever way I can get her. If she’s just the girl I fuck, then so be it. I’ll take what I can get.
The door opens before I even have a chance to knock. She has a scowl on her face, and part of me doesn’t care that she’s pissed because she’s fuckin’ one or more of my brothers and the other part of me is fuckin’ fuming. I promised her I wouldn’t fuck around on her, and I expected her to do the same thing.
I pace the small ass apartment for a few minutes before I even say anything to her. “How far along?” My voice is low and deadly. I can see the fear on her face, and I like knowing that she sees how pissed I am.
“Ten weeks,” she replies quietly.
I start to pace again, and my mind races as I think back to ten weeks ago. I’ve pretty much have had Trix in my bed every night for the last seven months unless I was out of town on a run. Fuck, I start to make my way towards the bedroom to grab my jacket that I left here a few weeks ago. “You’re fuckin’ shitting me, right?” I ask when I turn to look at her. Judging by the look on her face, I can see that she isn’t fuckin’ around.
“The baby is yours,” she says softly. I don’t even think; I just react. There is no fucking way.
“No, it’s not. You’ve still been fuckin’ my brothers after you swore to me that you weren’t. I told you I wouldn’t share you.” She comes towards me, and I swear I can see the anger in her face from me not believing her.
She pokes her finger in my chest and gets right in my face. “Fuck you. How dare you accuse me of sleeping with your brothers?” Before she can continue, I stop her.
“You’re a fucking club whore. You fuck all the brothers.” Before I can even anticipate it, she slaps me. The crack of her hand against my cheek echoes through the tiny ass fuckin’ apartment. Grabbing the hand that just hit me, I push her up against the wall. I don’t do it hard now that I know she’s pregnant. I put her arm above her head, and I lean in really close to her. “Don’t ever hit me.”
I see the venom in her eyes and it turns me on. “I haven’t fucked any of your brothers in the last year and a half.” I roll my eyes at her and it pisses her off more. “You are the only selfish son of a bitch that I’ve slept with in that time frame.”
“Then, how the fuck did you get pregnant?” I growl.
“Are you a fucking moron? We have sex almost every fucking night without using protection. I’m surprised I didn’t get pregnant sooner.”
I narrow my eyes at her, and she pushes against my chest with her one free hand. “There is no way I got your ass pregnant,” I tell her again. She gets ready to say something again, but I stop her. “I got a vasectomy when I was eighteen, remember? I told you that shit when we met.” Her eyes widen and her mouth drops open as she remembers our conversation. “There is no way that I got you pregnant,” I state. She pushes me away from her and I go this time.
“I didn’t sleep with your brothers. If you don’t believe me, then maybe there is nothing more to say.” Her eyes hit the ground and she refuses to look at me. I walk towards her room and grab my jacket before making my way towards the front door. When I look back at her, I can see the tears running down her cheeks.
She doesn’t try to stop me, but part of me wishes she would. Although she doesn’t like to admit it, she needs me just as much as I need her.
Making my way out of her apartment, I stand a few feet from her door for a couple of minutes. Before I can walk away, I hear her door open. Her footsteps are quiet and almost unnoticeable. Cold hands land on my stomach and trail their way under my tee shirt. Blowing out a breath, I try to calm myself down before I turn around.
“I don’t know how to explain this to you, Elec.” She presses her face into my back and my hands go to hers on my chest. “But I swear to you that I haven’t slept with any of the Draconic Crimson brothers in the last year and a half. When you said that you wouldn’t share, I believed you. I stopped coming around unless you were there.”
I don’t say anything to that. I just keep looking towards the parking lot. “Please say something, Elec,” she whispers.
“What do you want me to say?” I finally push the words out. Right now is the time that I wish I had a bottle of something hard. I need to get drunk. Hell, fuckin’ the anger out of me would work, too. Turning around, I force her to walk back towards the apartment. Her eyes flash with slight fear before she masks it.
I don’t say a word; I just shut the door behind us. Spinning her around, I push her over the arm of the couch and run my fingers down her back and to the waist of her small ass pajama shorts. Pulling them down quickly, I undo my jeans and pull my dick out. She needs to know that she is mine, and I’m not sharing her with anyone else again.
Grabbing my dick, I slide it up and down her pussy lips a few times before I slam into her from behind. She moans and pushes back into me. My left hand cracks against her ass cheek, and her back arches. “Elec,” she whimpers.
I thrust in and out of her at a quick pace, and her hands are gripping the couch cushion tightly. Her moans tell me she loves every moment and it brings me to the edge quickly. I give her ass one more smack before I feel her pussy clamping onto my dick like a vice. Her whole body convulses as she comes around my cock and I thrust into her, riding her orgasm out. Pulling out of her, I lean over her spent body and whisper in her ear, “Am I the only one who has claimed you here?” My fingers run over her puckered hole and she moans slightly, pushing back on my fingers.
When she doesn’t answer me, I give her ass another slap. “I want your words,” I grit out. My fingers find their way into her pussy, and I gather her wetness and start to massage my finger into her ass. Her breathing deepens and she continues to push back onto my fingers every few seconds.
“Only you,” she whispers. I remove my fingers from her and I hear her protest, but I don’t listen to her. Gathering up more of her wetness, I work my fingers in and out of her in a scissoring motion until I know she’s ready for me.
Once I get her ready for me, I remove my fingers and slide my dick over her hole. Before pushing inside of her, I reach forward and grab her red hair, pulling her upper body back into me. My arm wraps around her chest and her tit rests in my palm. Kissing my way down her neck, I sink into her inch by inch. I feel her fingers dig into my forearm when I pass through her ring of muscle. She finally relaxes completely and I’m able to start to slowly fuck her ass.
It doesn’t take me long before I can feel the tightening in my balls. I come quick and hard. My spent body pushes her into the couch and I stand up as soon as I get my bearings back. Pulling out of her, she looks over her shoulder at me and gasps. “Let’s go to bed. We can deal with this shit tomorrow.” I pick her up, bridal style, and walk her into the bedroom. I set her on her side of the bed, away from the door and she gets under the covers. Walking over to my side, I strip down and shut off the light.
Getting under the covers, I lie on my back and wait for her to cuddle into my body. When she does, I can finally stop my head from racing with all the possibilities of who the father of her kid is.
I’ve spent the last two hours with Trix. We’ve been laying in bed and talking. She wanted to know every fuckin’ detail about me being locked up, and the only thing I c
an think of right now is who the fuck is watching my family. Instead of trying to ignore the questions, I answered every one she has asked. Some of them scared her and others made her laugh.
When her eyes finally close, I slip out of her grip and make my way towards the bar. When I see Stavros standing at the end of the bar, getting a bottle of Johnnie Walker, I make my way towards him. “Hey, Easy E,” he says, looking back over the bar. He takes the bottle from the prospect and motions for me to follow him to his office. I go without thinking twice, and I know that he wants to talk about the shit I said regarding Romeo.
Taking a seat in the chair across from his desk, I wait for him to say something. “Your ass is fuckin’ lucky that Mica was able to get your confession thrown out. Not that it gave them anything other than the words ‘I killed that bitch.’” He grins at me, and I can’t help but laugh.
“What? It’s not like I knew what happened to her, so I couldn’t exactly write a full confession. Plus, I just needed enough proof found to keep Trixie out of jail and you guys were able to do that.” He shakes his head at me.
“You are fuckin’ lucky the damn judge didn’t keep your ass in jail for that stunt,” he mutters. I watch him take his bottle and unscrew the cap, taking a long pull from the brand new bottle. “So the cameras… you get anything on them? A model or serial number?” I shake my head no and he passes me the bottle. Taking a long swig, I set the bottle back on his desk and wait for the warm liquid to hit me.
The permanent scowl on his face tells me that Harlyn still isn’t talking to him. He’s been watching her from afar since she left and I feel bad for the fucker. He loves her and being away from her still, after everything they both went through, is tearing him apart from the inside out.
“Who would want to get rid of you?” he asks. I give him a look and he frowns. “Besides my VP.” Fuck, if I knew the answer to that, I wouldn’t be fuckin’ sitting here in his office. I would be finding the son of a bitch, and putting a bullet through the fucker’s skull.