by Kylie Chan
‘Give me a chance to win my money back from this black bastard,’ the Tiger growled. ‘One more round.’
‘Which black bastard do you mean?’ I said. ‘They’re both black.’ I gasped as I heard what I’d said. I opened my mouth to apologise, but it was too late.
All three of them collapsed over the table laughing.
‘Definitely time to let Emma rest,’ Mr Chen said.
Leo wiped his eyes. ‘I cannot believe you said that.’
Bai Hu reached across the table and took my hand. He smiled into my eyes. ‘You have just completely made my night. My week. My decade. Ah Wu has my number, sweetheart. Give me a call, any time.’ He shook his head. ‘I think I’m in love.’ He disappeared.
After we’d packed up, Mr Chen followed me to my room. ‘Can we talk?’
I let him in and sat on the couch. He sat with me.
‘I am so sorry about that,’ I said. ‘It just came out…’
‘I haven’t laughed like that in a long time,’ he said. ‘And I wanted to apologise for calling you “my woman”. But I had to do something.’
‘Why? He was just being facetious.’
He tilted his head slightly. ‘No, he wasn’t. He usually has about a hundred women in the West. And that, as he said, is just the humans.’
‘A hundred?’
‘He is irresistible, that is his nature. Even Leo has been in trouble with him. But if you were to fall for him, he would take you to the Palace in the West. You would be content for the rest of your life, serving him. As one of a hundred. Would you want that?’
I opened my mouth and closed it again. I shook my head. Of course, he’d been protecting me. ‘Thanks for looking out for me.’
‘The Tiger found you particularly interesting because you didn’t throw yourself at him. The others always do. You are very remarkable sometimes.’
‘Thanks.’ I glanced up at him. ‘Why are they giving you their armies? Are you expecting a war?’
He hesitated, watching me. ‘You are very perceptive.’ He took a deep breath. ‘The answer is: yes.’
‘Even the Jade Emperor gave you his army.’
He smiled slightly. ‘I am profoundly honoured. The Elite Guard is a very great privilege.’
‘That’s why you met with the Jade Emperor. You’re all expecting something to happen.’
He just watched me and didn’t say anything.
‘How long do we have?’
He looked down. ‘I don’t know.’
‘Will they attack us here?’
He shrugged. ‘While I am with you, you are safe. But I have not been in the Northern Heavens or on my Mountain for more than two years. It has become obvious exactly how weak I am. They all know. It is only a matter of time before they try me.’
‘We need to defend Simone, Mr Chen. You need to stay close to her.’
‘I know.’ He gazed into my eyes, very serious. ‘Emma…’ His voice trailed off. ‘Yes, John?’
Something shifted in his eyes when I called him by his first name.
‘I don’t want you to stay if you’re worried,’ he said. ‘If you’re scared, then resign. Go. If you leave my service they won’t come after you.’ He looked down. ‘You should go.’
‘Are you firing me?’
He smiled gently, still looking down. ‘No.’ ‘Do you want me to stay?’
He looked up and gazed intensely into my eyes. ‘Yes.’
‘You like having me around?’
He didn’t say anything, just looked into my eyes. Then, ‘I want you to be safe.’
I moved closer to him. ‘I’m safe with you.’ I took his hand and he didn’t pull away. ‘I feel very safe with you.’
I raised my other hand to his cheek. His skin was like silk. ‘We could have years, John. I don’t need more.’ I slid my hand behind his neck and pulled him closer.
He closed his eyes and lowered his face to mine.
Then he froze. He remained completely immobile, then gently removed my hand from his neck and held both of my hands in his. ‘It can’t happen, Emma, I’m sorry.’ He dropped my hands and rose. ‘Friends. Nothing more. I enjoy your company, and Simone loves you. Stay with us, you make us both happy.’
‘We could have years,’ I said again, without moving from the couch. ‘I don’t need more than that. Don’t throw something this good away just because it will have to end.’
‘I have no choice. Friends. That is all. Nothing more.’
He turned away, but I could see the pain in his face. He went to the door and opened it. ‘Goodnight, Miss Donahoe.’
I tried to hide my disappointment as I rose to see him out. ‘Are you sure?’
He nodded without looking at me, went out and closed the door behind him.
I flopped back onto the couch and put my head in my hands. Okay. Friends. I ran my hands through my hair. Nothing more. If that was what he wanted, then I had to respect his wishes.
That ache inside me wasn’t my heart breaking. I was glad to have what I did.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Several weeks passed without any incident, taking us to mid-October.
I’d put Simone to bed and waited until she finally nodded off. I went into my room, changed into a pair of black track pants and a white T-shirt, and wandered over to the training room.
The door was closed so I tapped on it.
‘Come,’ Leo said from inside.
I opened the door and poked my head in. Leo was working with the sword that usually resided on the wall next to the front door.
‘When are you finishing?’ I said.
Leo saw that I was dressed for practice, rather than in the black Mountain uniform I wore for lessons with Mr Chen. ‘Come in, we can share.’
‘You don’t mind?’
‘No, of course not,’ he said. ‘Come on in.’
I entered and closed the door. ‘I wanted to do some tai chi. Simone’s worn me out.’
‘What style?’ Leo put the sword back into its scabbard. ‘How many styles have you learned?’
‘I’ve learned Chen and Yang, and I’ve just started Wu.’
Leo put the sword onto the weapons rack. ‘I’ll do it with you. Nice change of pace.’ ‘Yang?’ I said.
He nodded and moved into position. ‘Sure.’
About a quarter of the way through the set Leo roused me out of my concentration by speaking. ‘Don’t get too attached to him, Emma.’
I didn’t stop my performance of the set. ‘Friends. Employer-employee. That’s all. We enjoy each other’s company. We both love Simone.’
‘You should be able to touch your hands by now when you do the heel kicks,’ he said. ‘Friends is good. Be his friend, but don’t try to be anything more. It can’t happen.’
‘I know that, Leo, we talked about it. I accept his decision. I’m happy the way it is.’
‘Don’t try to make it more, because if you do then you won’t have anything.’
I silently continued the set.
‘Just enjoy his company for as long as you have him,’ Leo said. ‘He likes your spirit. He loves teaching you. But it can never be more than that.’
We moved together through the final part of the set.
‘Friends,’ I said. ‘That’s all.’
‘Good.’ Leo turned and went out of the room without another word.
I moved into position to start a Chen set. We were friends, and that was all, and I was happy to have his company as long as he was there to give it to me. I didn’t need anything more. I was profoundly privileged to have what I did.
I just wished that damned ache inside me would go away.
The next day, in the afternoon, I dropped Simone into the music room for her Chinese lesson and headed up the hallway.
They were in the training room, and I heard them shouting from two doors away.
‘Just ask her!’ Leo shouted. ‘She wouldn’t mind at all!’
‘No,’ Mr Chen said. ‘And that is final.’
‘She wouldn’t care, my Lord, she’d probably enjoy it.’ Leo snorted with exasperation. ‘I don’t know why I bother, sometimes. Just ask her!’ He threw the door open and banged it into the wall, nearly knocking it off its hinges.
He saw me. ‘Here she is. Ask her.’
‘Ask me what?’
Leo pointed. ‘Go in there, and don’t let him get away with not asking you. It’s not like it’s a suicide mission.’ ‘A suicide mission?’
He took my arm and pushed me into the training room. ‘Just ask him!’
I went further into the training room. Mr Chen stood to one side, scowling, one hand on his hip and the other holding the sword from the entry, point down.
‘What’s all this about?’ I said.
He didn’t say anything, just looked irritated.
‘Okay,’ I said, and turned to leave the room.
‘For God’s sake, ask her!’ Leo roared from down the hallway.
I couldn’t help it; I had to laugh.
Mr Chen chuckled as well, and rubbed his hand over his face. ‘All right, come with me and I’ll show you.’
Leo grumbled loudly down the hallway, then the door to his room banged.
Mr Chen put his sword back into its scabbard and replaced it on the rack. ‘Come with me.’
I followed him into his office. It was even worse than usual. The pile of papers on his desk was in serious danger of toppling onto the floor, adding to the stacks of documents already there.
He sat behind his desk and tied his hair back. Then he shuffled through the papers on his desk.
‘You should do some filing in here. Or get someone to do it for you,’ I said. ‘How do you find anything?’
He looked at me sharply, then returned to shuffling through the papers. ‘You want to sort this lot out for me?’
‘You bet. I could probably have it all fixed up in a day.’ I peered over his desk. ‘Even that pile of rubbish on the floor over there.’
‘“That pile of rubbish”,’ he huffed, ‘is a set of priceless ancient scrolls handwritten by Wu Cheng’en himself.’
I nearly fell off my chair. ‘Not Journey to the West?’ He glanced sharply at me. ‘And it’s on the floor?’
He ignored me and continued to shuffle through the papers. Some of them fell off the desk and he caught them, then added them to the top of the pile.
‘Tomorrow morning,’ I said, ‘you are going to tell me how you want this disaster area organised, and then you are going to take your daughter out for the day.’
He stopped and glared at me. ‘Who are you giving orders to here?’
I leaned over the papers and glared back. ‘You.’
‘Oh, all right.’ He sat back. ‘I suppose I shouldn’t have them on the floor like that.’ He grunted as he found what he was looking for and pulled out a large embossed card. ‘Look.’
I turned it over. It was an invitation to a classical concert, a charity fundraiser organised by Kitty Kwok. Mr Chen went to these things all the time; sometimes he appeared in the social pages of the newspaper with gorgeous young socialites draped all over him. ‘Mr John Chen Wu donated a large amount of dollars and was thanked by the hostess.’
I looked up at him. ‘So?’
‘It’s more than two years now since I lost Michelle.’ He grimaced. ‘The vultures are starting to circle. These…women are chasing me.’
‘Lucky you.’
‘You’re joking, right? You know what these people are like?’
‘I know very well what they’re like, I used to teach their children. Some of them are lovely, generous souls.’
‘Not the ones that are after me,’ he said acidly. ‘You saw Claudia at the Jockey Club.’
‘Claudia is completely beautiful and would look fantastic on your arm,’ I said. ‘Even though you are a Chinese boy.’
He snorted with amusement. ‘You don’t know what it’s like.’
I tried to control my face. ‘It can’t be that bad.’
‘You have no idea. I get rid of one, another one’s right after her, chasing me. They won’t take no for an answer. They’re all over me.’
‘Sounds like guy heaven to me,’ I said unsympathetically.
He banged his hand fiercely on the desk. ‘You are no help at all, you know that?’
That pushed me over the edge. I completely lost it. I crossed my arms on the desk, buried my face in them and laughed until the tears came.
He sighed loudly and looked away.
When I’d regained control I sat up and wiped my eyes. ‘But what does this have to do with me? What do you want to ask me? I don’t know how to shake women off.’
‘Could you come with me and be my shield?’
‘What?’
‘Come with me to the concert. It’s for a good cause and I’d like to help out. If you come along, they won’t chase me nearly as much.’
‘See, that didn’t hurt, did it?’ Leo said from the office door.
‘Go and perform twenty-five stage one sword katas immediately,’ Mr Chen snapped.
‘Whoa, excuse me.’ Leo spun to return to the training room.
I turned my attention back to Mr Chen. ‘You want me to go along with you and pretend to be your girlfriend?’
‘No. It was a bad idea. Forget it. Dismissed.’
‘Don’t you dare. You want me to pretend to be your girlfriend?’
He sighed loudly. ‘This was a very bad idea.’
I rose and closed the door to his office. I sat again and searched for what to say. ‘Do you want me to be your girlfriend?’
He just watched me silently.
‘Well? Obviously Leo thinks this is a good idea.’
‘Leo’s opinions have absolutely no bearing on this situation.’
‘Well? Mr Chen? John?’
He winced.
‘Do you want me to be your girlfriend? No, wait.’ I raised my hands and took a deep breath. ‘John…’ I dropped my hands onto the desk and studied them, then looked up into his dark eyes. His face was rigid with control as he watched me. ‘There is nothing I would like more than to take our relationship a step further. Nothing I want more. Nothing.’
He didn’t say anything. He just watched me.
‘Both you and Leo have said that it can’t happen. Is it because you want to protect me?’
He studied me carefully. ‘Yes. I am protecting you.’
‘If the demons know that we care for each other, I’m a target as well.’
He watched me.
‘If the demons don’t know, then I’m not a target.’ He sighed gently.
‘But you still want me to come and pretend to be your girlfriend. You want me to pretend to love you in public, and be nothing in private.’ I leaned forward over the desk and rested my hand on his. ‘How about we try it the other way around? Be nothing in public and love each other in private?’
He jerked his hand away as if he’d been stung. His face didn’t shift.
‘Okay,’ I said.
He put his elbows on the desk and buried his face in his hands. ‘I am sorry, Emma. I should never have asked you this. We can never be anything more than friends. I have my reasons.’ He dropped his hands and looked into my eyes. ‘Please accept this. Be my friend. I love your company, but it can never be anything more. If you continue to push it, then I think it would be better if you left.’
I took a deep breath. ‘Okay. I’ll come with you and pretend to be your girlfriend, and I’ll be happy. I’d love to have my photo in the social pages.’
He gazed into my eyes. ‘Are you sure?’
I snapped myself out of it and tried to sound as cheerful as possible. ‘Sure. I’d better go and buy something glittery enough to wear.’ I grinned at him. ‘And you’re paying for me to have my hair done on the day.’
‘Whatever it takes,’ he said, relieved.
‘See? That didn’t hurt, did it? All you had to do was ask.’
‘You want to go and do sword kat
as too?’
‘Don’t mind if I do. Simone can come with me; we’ll do them with Leo.’
He breathed a sigh of relief. ‘Thanks, Emma. I really appreciate this.’
‘Oh, don’t worry, you’re going to pay,’ I said, and went out.
After Leo and Simone had finished performing the twenty-five katas, I stayed behind and did them for a while longer. A long while longer.
Nobody said anything.
Later I went to Leo’s room and rapped on his door. ‘Come.’
He was curled up on his sofa, watching a dreadful American action movie. He turned down the volume and I sat next to him.
‘Tripe,’ I said.
‘Yep.’ He pulled himself upright. ‘What is it?’ ‘I need to buy a dress. For the charity thing.’ He glowered.
‘Help me buy one, please, Leo.’
He crossed his arms over his chest. ‘Slap me with a stereotype, why don’t you?’ ‘Come on, Leo, I need you.’
‘Damn straight you do.’ He uncrossed his arms and pulled himself sideways on the sofa to speak to me. ‘It’s a wonder you haven’t been listed in “Hong Kong’s worst dressed”. You’re as bad as Mr Chen for wearing clothes that are way past their use-by date.’
‘He’s always impeccably dressed when he goes out; he’s only scruffy at home.’
Leo grinned.
‘You don’t!’
His grin widened.
I collapsed over my knees, laughing.
‘Actually it was Michelle who did the buying to start off with,’ he said. ‘The job sorta fell onto me afterwards. I don’t think he even looks at what’s in his closet; he just grabs whatever’s hanging up, as long as it’s black.’
His smile softened as he remembered. ‘I don’t even know if he was human to start off with, but it took him a lot of adjusting.’ He put his hands behind his head. ‘You should have seen some of the expressions on his face. Michelle thought it was charming.’
I laughed. I thought it was charming too. ‘I wish I’d seen some of them.’
Leo shrugged.
‘So?’ I said.
‘Okay. Looks like I’ll have two wardrobes to manage now.’