“Evie—”
“That’s fucking right, a half-hour earlier and I might have saved her life! The real kicker? Half an hour later and I might have saved mine! He kept me in that room with her for eight hours! Eight hours of being beaten by him and watching my sister rot! Watching him taunt and demean her! So, you tell me I’d ever hurt Taylor! You tell me that I would ever harm a hair on her beautiful, perfect, innocent head! I fucking dare you to say it again, you fuck! My sister was already dead, and I still put my body between hers and his! I begged him not to touch her! Begged him! I’d have done anything to protect her! Anything! So, fuck you! Fuck your company! Fuck your job! Fuck love! Fuck relationships! Fuck men! Fuck you, Oakley Orion! Fuck you!”
He didn’t even know how to start processing what she was saying. But he moved toward her as she screamed at him, tears streaking her face.
When he reached her, he touched her arm, but she recoiled. “Evie,” he whispered.
“Fuck you,” she said, but her voice was weakening. “Fuck you, Oakley Orion.”
“Ok,” he murmured, nodding.
He took her arm again, this time she didn’t pull away, she let him draw her close, into his arms.
When he had her, she sagged, her whole body lost all its rigidity and he swept her up into his embrace as she wailed and sobbed against him.
Damn.
This woman.
How could one person live through something so horrific?
He’d find out everything, but not now. What she needed was for him to hold her, to comfort her and support her.
Oakley turned his anger on himself, he’d almost let her walk out of here. He’d almost lost her.
If he had trusted his instinct, he’d never have said those horrible things. But he’d make it up to her, because she’d given him something precious. She’d given him the truth and shown him who she was, and it only made him care for her more.
Evie had cried until there was nothing left.
For so long she’d tried to keep all the anger bottled up inside. Something about Oakley had made it explode out. Embarrassed and exhausted, she kept her face buried in his chest long after the tears stopped.
Swallowing, she knew she couldn’t stay here forever. Her heart was still thumping, and her skin was trembling from the residual adrenaline that was making her feel cold, but she had to get it together.
Drawing in a shaky breath, Evie blew it out and concentrated on trying to keep the next one even. “I should go,” she whispered, pushing on his chest, but she only put an inch between them.
Somehow, she’d ended up with her legs over his lap, nestled between his body and the back of the couch.
“No,” he said, stroking her hair. “You’re not going anywhere.”
“You don’t have to take care of me, Oak. You want me gone. I’ll go. I just… I shouldn’t have lost it like that.”
“I think you should have,” he said, his index finger curving around from behind her head to hook her hair behind her ear. “I think it was probably overdue. You needed to get that out.”
Evie couldn’t argue against that, but she didn’t really have the energy to argue at all. “Yeah, well, it’s out now so…”
Pushing on him again, she tried to get him to move away, but he didn’t, though he did let one arm fall to her thighs to keep them over his.
“Don’t push me away, Sweet,” he said. His voice had changed pitch, it was more aware now than it had been while he was soothing her. “Look at me.”
Oh, shit. She didn’t want to do that. With her eyes probably bloodshot and swollen, she’d have makeup on her cheeks making her look soft and vulnerable. Evie didn’t want him to start thinking she was delicate, but her nerves were so stretched she didn’t have the ability to sass him.
“Oak—”
“Look at me, Evie. Please.” Something in his plea made her chin rise until her eyes found his. “You’re not going anywhere.” His hand drifted across her cheek. “And neither am I.”
“Oakley,” she said, capturing his hand. “Please don’t start thinking I’m vulnerable and soft a—”
“I always knew you were,” he said. “I just let myself forget it when you hurt me.”
“I… I hurt you?”
He nodded. “My pride was hurt and then I saw you with that guy and I… I got jealous… I’m sorry I lashed out, Sweet.”
This felt like bonding and the truth was, it terrified her. “I don’t know how to… there are so many things that you don’t understand. I’m not… I’m not like you think.”
“I can’t wait to find out,” he said and slipped his hand from hers to touch her face again.
Something about the delicate feel of those strong fingers made her eyes close and her head relax toward them. Wouldn’t it be nice not to be alone anymore? If she could just let herself be open and honest with someone, with Oak, her whole life would change. But how could she ever trust him? She couldn’t trust.
Although she felt his body move, Evie didn’t think that much about it until his lips met hers. Oh, a kiss. It was wonderful and slow and thorough. He didn’t push her, didn’t ask more of her than she could give. His warm lips moved over hers, pushing and relenting in unison with exactly what she needed.
It had been so long, but she couldn’t remember a kiss ever feeling like this. Maybe it had. Or maybe this was something special. Right now, she was so tired and full of need that she didn’t want to fight. She was so tired of fighting.
Opening her mouth, Evie tried to remember how to beckon him forth, but he sensed her need and let his tongue slide against hers. Oh, he was so warm and slick. He tasted like comfort and safety. It was an illusion, she knew it was, but Oakley made her feel secure. And in this minute, nothing could take away this sensation of belonging.
Lying in his arms, she let herself coast. It was day time, light flooded the room; there was nothing to fear.
Sliding a hand to his shoulder, she let it float to his neck and she pulled him harder against her. This body could protect her. If he cared about her, Oakley could be the fantasy. The man who’d stand beside her through anything.
The dream would never come true and she’d worked hard to come to terms with that.
Maybe in time, when she was herself again, back to normal, then she could think about opening herself to a relationship. But it wasn’t time. She wasn’t ready.
But, God, she wanted to be ready because she wanted Oak.
Her natural response to the kiss of a man she desired flourished. “Oakley,” she whispered.
Squeezing her other hand between them, she kept one hand on his neck as she rubbed her palm against the erection in his slacks. And while she licked her swollen lips, she sought his gaze, keeping him close enough that their noses bumped.
“Evie,” he murmured and there was such a strength of need in his tone that she smiled.
“Show me,” she said. “What should it have been?”
“You’re vulnerable and I don’t want—”
Pulling him back to her kiss, she pressed hard, asking for more. Sliding a hand over his, she guided it to her breast.
“Please, Oak,” she panted, “show me… slowly.”
He squeezed her breast and it felt so good to have him take control that for a second, she just let him touch her. But he must have sensed her lack of response because he stalled, so she made herself move.
Linking their fingers, she pushed him back, and he let her move him away this time. Yes, he was being respectful and probably giving her room to back out if she wanted to, but she didn’t want to.
All his show of respect did was spur her need.
eight
Taking him off the couch, Evie led him around the furniture and up the single stair into the bedroom in the back corner of the suite. Once they were inside, she unzipped her dress and let it fall to the floor.
Facing him, she started to unbutton his shirt. “We can stop,” Oakley said, brushing his fingers over and thr
ough her hair as she went to work unfastening his pants. “Any time you want. Anything makes you uncomfortable and we can stop.”
Unhooking her bra, she let it drop and then shimmied out of her panties before sliding onto his bed and seating herself in the middle. “I’m shit at this, remember? Stop making me take the lead.”
Gritting his teeth, he lunged onto the bed and gathered her beneath him. “I’m sorry I said that, Sweet.” He kissed her. “So sorry.”
“I know,” she said. Basking in the fantasy, Evie let her hand move onto his face and up into his hair. “You were right, I am a bitch. I deserved everything that you threw at me. I thought that if… that if I could have sex with you that my feelings… my attraction to you would go away.”
Shaking his head, he kissed her again. “We don’t want it to go away,” he said, kissing her neck and down to her breasts. “Let’s see what we can do about making it stronger.”
Skimming his lips down the center of her body, he opened her legs and kissed her clit. Oh, that had never felt like that. His tongue moved over her quickly, slowly, tasting and circling her. He made her pant and writhe until she was driving her fingers into his hair, screaming his name.
Oh, shit.
Orgasm.
Yes. Oh, fuck.
Evie had convinced herself she didn’t need it. Hadn’t wanted to even touch herself for so long. But Oak made her forget everything. Absolutely everything.
While she was still bucking, and trying to find oxygen, he rose over her to flatten his body on hers. “Ok, Sweet?” he asked. “Want to stop?”
Seizing his face, she kissed him hard. Thrusting her tongue into his mouth, she only felt stronger when she tasted herself on this incredible man who was taking care of her needs before his own. Her legs opened around him, letting her enjoy the experience of him grinding his hips downwards. The thick pulse of his cock stimulated her aching clit.
“Oh, Oak, I…”
“Come, Sweet,” he said, kissing her jaw and her earlobe then her neck.
Evie arched up and cried out again. “Fuck,” she hissed and threw a hand over her eyes.
“No,” he said, and pulled her hand down to make her look at him. “Stay with me, Sweet.” Had he sensed her emotions bubbling beneath the surface? “Want me to get a condom? Do you want me inside you? If you don’t, I—”
Shaking her head, she was dismayed when his pelvis started to withdraw. “No,” she screamed and grabbed for his hips. Winding her legs around him, Evie was determined to keep him near. “I’m on the pill… if you don’t believe me, get a rubber, but I… for my cycle, it keeps me regular, I… if you want to go bareback—”
“Sweet,” he said, kissing her. He was smiling at her. She didn’t know how he was together enough to be smiling. Evie couldn’t control her face, couldn’t control her voice, or her body; this whole afternoon was turning into a clusterfuck. “You keep surprising me.”
Next time when his hips moved, she let him have enough room to push himself into her. Groaning out, her whole body shook as he slid home. “Oh, fuck, Oak… I… I can’t…”
“Yes, you can,” he said, “just look at me.”
Swallowing, she dropped her eyes to his and the look of smoldering desire he fixated on her made her shiver. “Fuck me,” she whispered.
He shook his head and kissed her, sliding an arm under her shoulders. “Make love to me. Say it for me, Sweet.”
His dick was inside her, all the way in there, fat and hard making her squirm and quake and shiver, yet he was just lying there on top of her, waiting. “Make love to me, Oakley Orion.”
He’d given her so much today. He’d never know the gratitude she had for his patience and his understanding. Evie had been so afraid to tell anyone the truth that she kept herself closed off from everyone. But when Oak’s hips began to move, she forgot about what he’d done for her and focused only on what he was doing now.
It felt amazing. Incredible. The thick length of him occupying her and withdrawing, wringing her juices from deep inside her as her body responded to her need and his demand. Filling her only to tease her with emptiness, he worked slow at first, so slow she thought she’d go insane with the pace.
But as she clung to him and tried to hurry him on, he kept his rhythm steady. Only when she was wracked with a frenzy of want did he start to go faster and faster. The sensation of the easy friction built a pressure in her belly that shot down through her clit.
She clenched around him and cried out again. “Oh! Oakley, I… Oak! Oh! Oh!”
As her body spasmed around his, Oak clenched his teeth and hissed, the impact of his hips hit her hard and then he went still. Blinking at him, Evie dropped a hand to her breast as he grinned at her.
A second later, he rolled away onto his back, though his legs stayed twined with hers. “That,” he sighed. “Is how it should’ve gone. Fuck, Sweet, can you say epic?”
For a good minute, neither of them said anything.
Evie straightened her loose arm, moving it from her breast onto his torso. Oak picked it up to link their fingers and raised it to his mouth.
“Oak,” she said. “What do we do now?”
“Now,” he said, straightening each of her fingers in turn, he kept his lips against the back of her hand. “I make a commitment.”
The natural reaction of her body was to tense. He must have sensed it because he laughed and turned onto his side to press a hand onto her belly. “Oak—”
“Listen to what I said, I make a commitment. I’m not asking you for one. I’m going to commit myself to you.”
“Why would you do that?” she asked.
As much as Evie knew she should get up and run away fast, she was beginning to understand that something in her had wanted to tell him the truth. She could’ve walked away cursing him and gone back to her life. But she hadn’t, she’d opened up to him.
“Because I want to be with you,” he said, sliding his hand up and down her body.
Dropping the back of her hand to her forehead, Evie sighed and admired the man who was admiring her. “You don’t know who I am,” she said. “I… I’m not trying to push you away, this afternoon has been…” Why couldn’t he understand this wasn’t as simple as good sex? That didn’t solve everything. “Shit, Oak, you don’t know who the fuck I am.”
“I look forward to finding out,” he said and kissed her, but she grabbed his shoulder and pushed him back.
“No, you don’t. I’m fucked up. Seriously fucked up. It’s been four years and… I still have nightmares. I still sleep with the light on. I booby-trap my apartment… I’m a crazy person.”
Caressing her face, he didn’t seem to be put off. “If you are, I want you to be my crazy person. I know you don’t like commitment, so I’m not asking you to commit to me. I don’t want to talk about the future. I just want to be with you today… and tomorrow… We’ll take this one day at a time.”
Why was he being so patient and understanding? “We wouldn’t be able to spend nights together… I sleep with pepper spray and knives.”
“Ok,” he said. “I’m whatever you need me to be. If you want to let me in, I’ll support whatever you need, even if it means sleeping with a machete under our pillows… But I’ll wait, until you’re ready to trust me and I’ll take an inch at a time.”
Her lips curled on their own. “I thought that was my pussy’s job.”
He laughed and bowed to kiss her. “God, Evie, you’re so amazing.”
Teasing was instinct, it had been her defense mechanism for a long time. Being with Oak felt amazing, but it felt wrong that she should have happiness. His admiration was flattering, but misplaced. Like she’d said, he didn’t really know her.
“How can you think that?” she asked. “I didn’t save her. I wasn’t there in time… I did nothing.”
“How did you get out?”
Spreading her hand on his chest, she watched her fingers move over him. “One of the neighbors heard commotion, I think�
� Gemmell, he was Beth’s boyfriend… her murderer… he was beating me for a while and… I pushed the floor lamp over when I fell, it smashed a window. The cops came about an hour later… But he ran off, after he… put a knife in me.” Picking up Oak’s hand, she pressed his fingertips to the scar on her ribs beneath her breast. “Think he thought I was dead… I was in the hospital for weeks.”
“Sweet,” he murmured, exuding sorrow. He pressed his hand to her scar. “I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine—”
“No one can,” she said. “But it’s been four years, I’ve talked about it with Noel a lot. I can… I’m processing it.”
“What about your parents? Do they support you?”
“I, uh…” Geez, this was tough. She couldn’t make eye contact, but he didn’t seem to be pushing her. “My dad died when I was a teenager and my mom, uh… She committed suicide the day after Gemmell was arrested.”
“Fuck,” he breathed out. “Sweet, how the hell did—”
“I had to testify,” she said. “I had to, um… I had to get on with it, you know? She wrote me a letter, my mom…”
“What did it say?” he asked, his voice as soft as the hand he trailed over her body in comfort.
Here was the shame. When she blinked, a tear trickled out from the corner of her eye. “I never read it,” she whispered and blinked her eyes to his. “How sad is that? I could never bring myself to…”
“Shh,” he said, pulling her body to his again.
But Evie didn’t want to cry, not again. It was nice being warm against him like this, skin-to-skin, her head tucked under his. He was so much bigger than her, and not just physically, but in confidence and sanity.
Thirteen Page 8