Um, what?
Then she saw Millie looking at Scooby-Doo and Snappy who were keeping her company.
“Oh, um, I . . . these . . .”
“No need to be embarrassed,” Millie said with a kind smile. “I left mine at home. But Chompers does most things with me. He sleeps with me too. Spike takes up most of the bed, though, so it can be a tight fit for the three of us. I suggested we get a bigger bed, then maybe Mr. Fluffy can sleep with us. Spike didn’t agree.”
The dog looked like he could almost take up a double bed just on his own. So she kind of had to agree with that.
“You like Scooby-Doo? I do too.”
“Yeah, you don’t think that’s odd?”
“Girl, you’re asking the wrong person about what’s odd. I have a dinosaur purse.”
Tabby had to grin.
“So enough procrastination. Hit me with it.”
Could she tell her? Should she? But who else did she have to talk to? And Millie knew Razor, she might be able to give some insight.
“I kissed him,” she blurted out.
Millie’s mouth dropped open. Then she grinned. Wide. “You did? You go, girl. That’s awesome.”
“No, it’s not awesome. Really not awesome. He pulled away from me.”
“Get out.”
“Um.”
“He did not.”
“He did,” she insisted.
“He didn’t kiss you back? I refuse to believe it. How could he not kiss you back?”
“Maybe he’s not into me.”
“Nooo.” Millie looked shocked at the thought. Which did a lot to soothe Tabby’s injured pride. That hurt that she’d buried deep lessened.
“Well, I mean, he did kiss me back for a start,” she admitted.
Millie slapped her thigh, making Tabby jump. “Well, there you go. He kissed you back.”
“But then he drew away. And he’s been acting strange ever since. Distant.”
“What a dumbass.”
“What?” she asked. Why was she calling her a dumbass? That seemed kind of rude.
“Not you,” Millie told her. “Razor. Obviously, he kissed you back because you’re gorgeous and he’s attracted to you. But then, for some reason, he drew away. It’ll be some stupid reason. Like how he shouldn’t want you because you work for him and he’s in a position of power. Or because you’re younger than him. Or because you’re vulnerable from what you went through with Luther and he doesn’t want to push.”
“Wow. You’re good at this.”
“I know. See, Reverend Pat was wrong. I’m not nosy. I totally have that sick sense.”
“You do.” She didn’t bother correcting her that it was a sixth sense. If she wanted to call it a sick sense, she could.
“Do you really think that’s why he’s acting funny? Not because he’s not actually attracted to me?”
Millie waved a hand. “Totally. Question is, how do we get him to tell you what’s going on?” She tapped her chin. “How do you feel about nudity?”
“Um.” What?
“That might be too much anyway. I mean, coming home to find you nude in his bed would give him a shove, but he might go all shy. These guys have got delicate feelings. We have to be careful not to hurt them.”
She didn’t remember much about Spike, but from what she did, well, she wasn’t sure he had that many delicate feelings.
“I don’t think I’m comfortable with climbing into his bed naked.”
“Too bad. It’s a nice direct approach, you know. We need something grand and dramatic.”
“Or I could just ask him, I guess.”
Millie blinked. “Ask him. I wonder if that would work. I’ll have to think about it. Could you do that?”
Could she?
“I’m not sure.”
“Well, that’s a problem, then. How long are you staying here for?”
“I don’t know. I thought about leaving last night. I couldn’t sleep. But then I figured that would be rude.”
“Yeah, and he’d just go after you and drag you back. You’re not going anywhere unless he wants you to. These guys are stubborn. And really protective. I bet you’re not allowed to lift a finger.”
“I’m not. But I should be able to use crutches tomorrow. Maybe even walk on my ankle. Once I can do that, I’m going to go home.”
“Or you could come stay with me. I’ll take care of you. It would be great fun. We could have a sleepover. We can even invite my friends. Betsy, Sunny, Emme, and Jewel would love to have a sleepover with us.”
“I, um . . .” Was she ready for that? Maybe not yet.
“Once you’re ready,” Millie said gently. “Sorry, I can be a lot.”
“No.” She shook her head. “No, you’re perfect. It’s me. I’m just not used to having friends. I’d like some, though. I’m kind of lonely,” she admitted.
Millie reached over and squeezed her hand. “Then I’d be honored to be your friend. And friends can tell each other anything, okay?”
“Okay,” she whispered. “I want to tell you something, but I’m nervous.”
“Is it that you’re a Little?”
“What?” Tabby asked.
“Oh. That wasn’t it? Huh, my sick sense must have been off about that. Drat. It’s probably all this healthy food that Daddy has me eating. It’s just not good for me. I’m telling you, it’s not normal to be that regular.”
“What?” Did she just say Daddy?
“Pinky promise that you won’t tell other people, I mean other than people who already know, like my friends. And also pinky promise that you won’t think it’s weird or stuff.” Millie held up her little finger.
“You’re going to tell me something that you think I’ll find weird and you don’t want me to tell other people about?” she clarified.
“Right.”
Tabby wrapped her finger around Millie’s. “There’s nothing you can tell me that will make me think you’re weird. And I would never betray a confidence.”
Millie beamed. “And that’s why we’re gonna be best friends.”
They were? That sounded like fun.
“So, here it goes. I’m a Little.”
“Okay.” She wasn’t sure what that meant. Or what she should say.
“I like playing with toys. I sleep with a stuffed dinosaur. Sometimes my Daddy cuts up my food small and feeds it to me. I like using a pacifier and not just because it can help with my migraines. I’m a Little and Spike is my Daddy Dom. He cares for me, loves me, looks after me. So. Do you think that’s weird?”
“No. I mean, I’ve never heard of it, but that doesn’t make it weird.” Something niggled in the back of her mind, but she pushed it aside.
“Some people do. But it’s . . . it’s something I need. Going into Little headspace is a way for me to let go of all my adult worries, you know? I can just play and have fun, and Spike is there to take care of me. It’s a softer side of BDSM. Sure, there are still punishments and consequences. But I feel safe with those. Like, I know the boundaries and if I push them, then Spike is there to reinforce them. It’s nice to know someone cares if I’m late getting home and don’t call. Or if I’m tired and stressed, he’ll hug me and make sure I rest.”
It sounded amazing.
“I’ve always been a bit different, I guess. My best friends before I came here were all over the age of sixty-five. I’m impulsive and a bit crazy, and I can be a lot to take. But Spike loves me just as I am. He just makes sure that I stay safe and healthy and happy. And sometimes, playing with my toys is what makes me happy. That’s not wrong, is it?”
“No, it’s not wrong at all. In fact, that sounds amazing.”
Millie beamed at her.
“Thought you might think that.”
Tabby blinked at her. “Wait. Do you think that I might be a Little?”
“I wondered if you could be. No pressure for you to be. You don’t have to be in order for us to be friends, okay?”
“All right. W
hy would you think that?”
“Well, there’s your stuffies.” Millie pointed to Snappy and Scooby.
“Lots of adults have stuffed toys.”
“True.”
“Only.” Tabby chewed at her lower lip. “Is there stuff you can read about Littles and Daddies?”
“Sure, I can recommend some books, if you have an eReader or an app.”
“I’ve got one on my phone.” She pulled it out and bought some of the books that Millie suggested.
“I’ve probably overwhelmed you. Sorry.”
“No, you’ve actually given me something to think about. I, um, I have something I need help with.”
If Millie could be brave, so could she.
“Sure, what is it?”
“I need to know what the soundproofing is like between the walls of the bedrooms. Could you maybe go into Razor’s bedroom and tell me if you can hear me?”
Millie blinked then grinned. “Oh, girl, what did you do?”
“Something horribly embarrassing.”
Millie helped her into her bedroom then she left to go into Razor’s bedroom. She waited a few seconds before letting out a noise that was close to the same level she thought she’d made the other night.
“Was that the noise?” Millie called out.
She groaned loudly. “Yep. You obviously heard.”
“Um, yeah. Wait there.”
Millie walked into her room a few seconds later. Tabby was lying on the bed with a pillow over her face. She felt the bed move then Millie grabbed hold of her hand.
“You made that noise in bed, didn’t you?”
“Yep.”
“While you were, you know what, right?”
“Yep.”
“Were you using a toy?”
“Nope.”
“Well, I have you beat then, I was.”
It took a moment for those words to sink in then Tabby sat up and stared down at Millie. “What?”
“Yep. I stayed with Spike for a while because, well, that part doesn’t matter. But anyway, I was in the bath and I thought I’d use my dino vibrator. Because being close to Spike had made me horny.”
She got that.
“I cried out when I came. He knocked on the bathroom door, worried about me. I told him there was a mouse.”
“A mouse?”
“Yep. A mouse.” Then I slipped getting out of the bath. He had to rescue me. Long story short, he cleaned up in the bathroom for me and found the dinosaur vibrator.”
“Oh, God, Millie!”
“Yep. He figured out there was no mouse.”
Tabby couldn’t help it. She burst into laughter. She buried her face in the pillows next to Millie, who started laughing as well. Then she patted Tabby on the back. “So you see, your story isn’t that bad. At least he didn’t find your vibrator.”
Tabby rolled onto her back, wiping at her eyes. “I guess I can be thankful for that.”
They were silent for a long moment.
“Razor’s a good guy, Tabby. If you really like him, then don’t give up on him, okay?”
“I won’t.”
“But also, don’t hurt him. Cause I like you, I wouldn’t like to have to rearrange your face.”
“Noted.”
Millie rolled over to face her. “Come to Reaper’s this weekend.”
“What?”
“Yeah, we’re setting up a karaoke station. The guys don’t know yet. It’s one of those ask for forgiveness rather than permission deals. Jewel is going to set it up. She’s good at being sneaky like that. Sunny isn’t. We haven’t even told her yet. Emme’s good at keeping a secret too, but we’re not sure she can make it. It’s not exactly safe for her.”
It wasn’t?
“Her dad is . . . well, she just got reunited with him, and he has enemies. One warned Jewel that if Emme’s father kept coming after him that he would retaliate. It’s why we all need to be watched.”
“But you’re here.”
“Yeah, but Spike drove me and he’ll pick me up. And I’m not allowed to leave. Oh, and there’s a guard outside.”
“What? There is?”
“Yeah, Emme’s dad arranged for us all to have guards when our guys can’t be around, ever since Mr. X, that’s the name of the bad guy, it’s a good name, right? Anyway, since that warning, we’ve all been under close watch. Normally, Spike would stay but he had some stuff to do. He doesn’t really like me leaving the house anymore. But we’ll be safe at Reaper’s. We’ll be surrounded by Iron Shadows guys. They’re a bit rough, but mostly harmless.”
“I don’t know. I’ll think about it.”
“I wonder if Emme’s dad needs to arrange a guard for you, seeing as Razor is interested in you.”
“We don’t know that he is, though,” she pointed out.
“He is. We just have to give him a little push. Don’t worry, we’ll figure this out. There’s nothing I can’t do once I put my mind to it. Just ask Reverend Pat, he’ll tell you. I get shit done.”
That’s kind of what she was afraid of.
13
What was she doing?
Was she seriously going into a biker bar? She stared out of her car windshield at the sign. This place looked run-down and some of the guys walking inside appeared rough, to put it mildly. But Razor was in there.
And Millie.
She should have told Millie that she’d changed her mind and asked her to pick her up. She’d returned to her apartment yesterday, after she’d shown Razor that she could walk fine.
To her surprise, he hadn’t put up much of a protest. Which had made her think that Millie was wrong. He wasn’t interested in her. He was just being kind because he felt sorry for her.
So she’d gone home to her quiet, empty apartment and her fish.
And she didn’t think she’d ever felt more alone.
Razor had told her that he didn’t want to see her back at work until Monday, so she’d spent all of today sitting around feeling sorry for herself. Until she’d made the last-minute decision to come here tonight.
So, here she was.
Dressed in a pair of tight jeans and a sparkly top. Her hair was up in a ponytail and she’d even put on some make-up.
She could do this. How hard could it be to walk into a bar alone?
“Really fucking hard,” she muttered to herself. “Should have stayed home with the fish. They aren’t scary and they don’t judge. Well, much. I’m pretty sure that Shaggy is a bit judgey. It’s in the beady eyes.”
And now she was talking to herself. She was going to become a crazy fish lady.
Truth was, it might have been only thirty-two hours since she’d last seen Razor and Luna, but she missed them.
If only she hadn’t kissed him.
Such an idiot.
Climbing out of her car, she locked it and glanced around. With a sigh, she limped towards the front door where a huge guy stood, watching her. His eyes narrowed as she drew closer. Probably wondering who the hell she was and what she was doing here.
Because she was a complete fish out of water.
“What happened to your foot?” he barked, surprising her.
“Um, I twisted it.”
“Someone hurt you?”
“No.” Were these normal questions for a bouncer to ask?
“Should you be walking around on it?”
“The doctor said it was fine to start walking on it for short periods of time after a few days.”
The big man just grunted. This was very weird. “Got ID?”
She fished around in her sparkly handbag and drew out her ID. He gently grasped hold of her hand, turning it over. “What happened to your hands?”
“I fell over when I twisted my ankle.” She’d taken the bandages off, but the grazes were still visible.
“You clumsy?”
“Not usually,” she said in a bewildered voice.
Another grunt. Was she supposed to know what that meant? He checked her ID then handed it
back to her. “Why’re you here?”
“Um, a friend invited me.”
“Yeah? Who’s that?”
Did she have to tell him to gain entrance?
“Her name is Millie.”
His eyebrows rose. “You know Millie?”
“Yes. Do you?”
“Yeah. She made this shirt for me. Find it hard to get shirts the right size.”
She could see why.
“It’s very nice,” she told him, since he seemed to be waiting for her to say something.
“Yep. You go on in. Have a nice night. If anyone bothers you, come get me. I’ll knock their heads together.”
“Okay, thank you.” Was that the appropriate response? He seemed happy with it.
She stepped into the room. Oh, crap. She’d expected just a few people drinking in groups and at the bar. She’d thought she would immediately see Millie. Or Razor. Or someone she knew.
Maybe there was a good reason the bouncer had told her to let him know if anyone bothered her. Because as soon as she moved into the room, people turned to stare at her. A grizzled-looking man wearing baggy jeans and a leather jacket with the arms cut off walked past with a grunt. “You lost, girlie?”
“Um, no,” she replied as he stared at her tits with fascination.
“Who you lookin’ for, cause I’m sure I can make you a better offer.”
Ew.
“I know you definitely can’t,” she replied.
He narrowed his gaze, reaching for her. She dodged around him and pushed through two big, smelly guys. Yuck. She couldn’t believe this was where Millie wanted to hang out.
Both men stopped their conversation to stare down at her. “Excuse me.”
A hand slapped down on her ass. “No worries, sweetie.”
Let it go. Walk past. Don’t say anything.
But, damn it, she was sick of people thinking they got to do what they liked to her. This asshole had just snapped the last of her control.
She whirled, hands on her hips as she glared up at the big, bearded guy. “Did you just slap my ass?”
“Did you like it?”
“No, asshole, I didn’t like it.”
“You know, you should watch the way you talk to me, little girl. That’ll get you into trouble.”
Fierce Daddy Page 15