by Taryn Belle
As she drove into the circular driveway of her childhood home, she tried to remember that last time she’d been there. Christmas, probably, when she’d attended the obligatory family dinner. She felt slightly ashamed as she remembered sitting at the table with her parents and brothers, hating the happy pretense and wishing it all away. How could she have been so unappreciative when someone like James had no family at all?
James. It always came back to him.
“Laina,” her father said when he opened the door. She stepped forward and gave him a quick embrace. “This is a surprise. It’s good to see you,” he said, kindly not mentioning how long it had been.
“You too, Dad. Where’s Mom?”
“Out shopping. She’ll be sorry she missed you.”
Laina nodded as she slipped out of her flats and wandered into the sitting room. Everything was familiar—the Queen Victoria furnishings, the Persian rugs, the original art on the walls. Like a museum.
“I won’t stay long. I just...” Just what? Wanted to grill you about James Ellison? Because that was why she was here, wasn’t it? To feel a little bit closer to him because he’d crossed paths with them today? It was pathetic. “I was surprised to hear you were thinking of selling Hibiscus Heights. Why did you take so long to tell me?”
Her father looked shocked. “I’m surprised it matters to you. You always stay with Kiki when you visit Moretta.”
Laina nodded. “I know. But this last week... I guess I realized what I’ve been missing.”
He nodded slowly. “Well, your mother and I love that house, but things have changed. We don’t use it as a family anymore. When a developer approached us last year, it got us thinking. Bev and I have always thought that more of the world should be able to enjoy the island. James Ellison—he does a lot of work in Florida. He looked like he had the right idea. Nice fellow.”
Nice fellow. Laina didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “I get that change will come to the island eventually, Dad. But it should be done by someone with a record of environmental responsibility. James Ellison might have the right intentions, but if you sold to him—”
“Hang on, honey. I didn’t sell to anybody.”
“You didn’t?”
“No.”
Laina shook her head. “But...you did meet with him today?”
“Yes, though I must say your mother was more excited about the food than the actual meeting. You know how she loves the lunch menu at the St. Regis—”
“Dad, can we stick to the topic?”
“Of course. No deal was made. In fact, he rescinded his offer and withdrew his development proposal altogether.”
Laina’s mouth fell open. “What? Why?”
“He really didn’t say. But I was going to ask how you know this fellow. Because he seemed to know an awful lot about you. In fact, he was asking me some rather odd questions.”
Her heart skipped. “Such as?”
“He was very interested in some blueprints you made up sometime ago. The ones for your final project at Spelman. I told him the units looked a little large for what—”
Laina held up a hand. “Wait. You mean you actually remember those blueprints?”
“Of course.”
“But—but you never said anything! If I remember right, you took a call while I was showing them to you, and then you never brought them up again.”
Her father leaned forward, clasping his hands together. “Listen, honey. I just—passive housing, it seemed so pie-in-the-sky to me. But I didn’t want to be unsupportive, so instead I said nothing.”
“No conflict, right?” Laina said quietly.
Her father shook his head. “We just wanted you to be happy, honey—all three of you. But I see now that trying to fit you into a mold wasn’t fair to you. I guess back then I thought a lot of your interests would change—”
“And become more like yours?”
He laughed. “Or at least like Paul and Wesley’s. But I’m glad they didn’t. And now, what do you know? Green construction is all the rage!”
“Dad—” Her voice caught.
“Yes?”
“Just—” Laina took a deep breath. “I wanted to say thank you. You and Mom gave me so much when I was growing up, and I guess I never really appreciated it.”
Conrad chuckled. “I’d say that makes you like about ninety-nine percent of offspring out there.”
“I know, but still... I’ve acted like a spoiled brat. Changing my name, refusing to stay at the estate. I guess I was able to fool myself into thinking that even though I was still going to the most exclusive island on earth, it didn’t count because I was saving for the plane ticket all year and staying at a friend’s staff cottage. Now that I think about it, it was actually kind of insulting to all the people out there who really do struggle.” She shook her head. “I wasn’t trying to hurt you, I just needed to make my own way. And I didn’t know how else to do it.”
“Honey...” Conrad grasped her hands. “Listen to me. I am so proud of you. You’ve always known who you are and what makes you tick, and you’ve always stayed true to your convictions.” He sat up straight. “Which gets me to thinking. If that James fellow is so bad, why don’t you teach him a thing or two? I have his number—I could set up a coffee date.”
Laina almost laughed out loud. “Thanks for the offer, but I don’t think so.” She stood up. “I should get going. But it was great seeing you, Dad.”
“You too,” he said, standing with her. “Next time not so long between visits, okay?”
She slipped out the door and closed it behind her, and then she stood on the marble landing for a minute. There was so much to process. Her father’s approval, James rescinding his offer to buy Hibiscus Heights, her blueprints. Why would James probe for information about them? Did he want to try to make things up to her by using her idea for his resort? But he’d never even laid eyes on them, and how would he complete his project without owning Hibiscus Heights? And did he ever stop trying?
No, Laina realized. James hadn’t stopped trying to win her back since she’d unleashed her fury on him at the rehearsal dinner. Now that he no longer had any vested interest in her or her family, he’d proved his sincerity. But what if he’d been sincere about his ignorance the entire time, but had finally given up on her because he simply couldn’t take the rejection anymore?
Laina pulled her phone out of her handbag and gave it a quick glance. Of course there was no message from him—she’d made it clear she didn’t want to hear from him. So he’d listened to her, and who could blame him? After the way she’d treated him, she deserved it.
Oh, God. What have I done?
Propelling herself off the landing, Laina ran to her car and pulled the door open. This was a conversation she needed to have in person, and with a little luck he was still here. Where had her father said they met today? The St. Regis.
She turned her car toward downtown and hit the gas.
* * *
Standing at his darkening hotel room window holding his cell phone, James stared down at the passing pedestrians on the street below him. It was a ridiculous way for him to spend his time, looking out for a face he knew he wouldn’t see, but he’d made himself a deal. Here in Laina’s city, tonight and only tonight, he would allow himself to remember her. He would relive every detail of their magical time together—that first kiss on the boat, their earth-shattering encounters in the forest, in his bed, on the beach, and the moment he’d known he was deeply and madly in love with her.
And then, when tomorrow morning came and he got on a plane to head back home, he’d force himself to forget her forever. He’d get on with his life and somehow find meaning in it without her. He knew the truth now, even if he didn’t accept it: Laina was never coming back to him.
It had been three hours since James had climbed the steps to Laina’s office a
nd found the door locked. He’d known she worked on her own, but he hadn’t realized that really did mean on her own—she didn’t even have an assistant. He’d waited over an hour for her, tolerating furtive glances from passing strangers. At one point he’d stepped into a neighboring business to ask about the usual opening hours of Rose Architecture, but they’d claimed ignorance. Finally, as the other offices began to expel their staff at the end of the day, he’d written her a note on a Post-it and stuck it to her door.
I’m sorry I missed you, but I had to try you in person. Please call me. There’s something I want to do, but I need your permission first. James
James looked down at his cell phone for the hundredth time, as if a message from her may have materialized from nowhere. Then he hurled it across the room onto his bed. This was fucking stupid. So he’d done the right thing—rescinded his offer to her parents, scrapped the development, and even ended his partnership with Jennifer for good to avoid any crossed lines in the future. It was nothing he shouldn’t have done a long time ago. And it didn’t change the fact that Laina wasn’t going to call him, that his shiny new idea wasn’t going to win her back, and that there was no reason for him to wait around here any longer like a goddamned fool.
He was never going to see her again.
He looked at his watch, and then he walked over to the desk and grabbed his iPad. There were still plenty of flights back to Miami tonight, and nothing was holding him here. He booked his flight, hurriedly packed his suitcase and left his room.
As he strode down the hallway toward the elevators, the last line he’d written on his note to Laina blinked in his head like a siren. How long had he stood there debating back and forth before finally going with his heart and scribbling it down?
PS I dream about you every night.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
LAINA WAS DREAMING.
She was lying on a bed in the middle of a room filled with lavender roses, and James was trailing kisses up her leg. From her ankle all the way to her thigh, his heavenly tongue teased her with what was to come. Her entire body was already throbbing with want, her pussy so wet as she waited for that delicious first sweep of his tongue. It made her cry out when she finally felt it. His fingers went inside her, massaging that magical spot while he sucked her clit softly, firmly, softly, firmly until she was rushing toward her climax so fast, so hard. She buried her hands in James’s soft hair, not daring to look down at him. Knowing that if their eyes met while he had her under his power in this beautifully intimate moment, she would come apart.
“Laina, you taste so sweet,” he murmured, opening his mouth wide so she could feel his warm tongue pressed flat to her. Her hips bucked up, a silent plea for more. More pressure, more of that slippery sensation, more of those perfect, intoxicating words that filled her body and heart with a feeling she was helpless to describe. So much more than lust, so much more than love. The most soul-saturating, passionate, excruciatingly beautiful emotion that existed. “I’m going to taste you like this forever. I’ll always be with you. I love you so much I can’t even see straight.”
She had to see him. Had to look at him between her legs, worshiping her like that, loving her like that. His eyes fastened on hers, and her groin fluttered with the emotion of connection so intense it stole her breath. She reached for his hands and entwined them together, squeezing his tightly as the heat built to an inferno.
She fell over the edge, rocking her hips back and forth on the mattress, every muscle in her body tensed toward her pleasure, her pussy contracting sweetly on his fingers, crying his name over and over again. When she came back into her body, he was straddling her hips. His beautiful, rock-hard cock was straining upward, aching with desire for her. The fire that had just been sated inside her relit, hotter than ever, desperate for the feel of him inside her.
Her swollen lips were already open when James’s mouth came down on hers, his tongue slashing her wide as an animal sound ripped from his throat. “Everything,” he said fiercely into her mouth. “Every part of me belongs to you. Feel it. Feel it. Feel how much I need you.”
He entered her with a thrust so deep and sweet it turned her body to liquid. Paralyzed with exquisite sensation from her head to her toes, Laina lay helplessly under him as he drove into her. His breath turned ragged as he grabbed her thighs and shoved them upward mercilessly, laying her bare. Claiming her. His mouth coming down on her neck, on her breast, biting her there until she cried out from the perfect blend of pain and pleasure. She thrust herself into his mouth, wanting more of it, more of him, more of that savage need. She was already spiraling upward, the heat in her clit growing again.
His eyes fluttered shut with sheer ecstasy as he quickened his pace even more, and then he opened them and fixed them on hers. “I’m so close,” he panted. “So close because I love you so damn much.”
Then the bed shook with the power of their combined climax, her shattering moan mingling with his guttural release, both of them lost in a moment so perfect it could never be repeated. Could only lie alongside all the others before and after, each a unique expression of an eternal bonding love for each other, made so much more exquisite from the power of knowing all they had almost lost.
* * *
It was real. So real, and Laina was crying.
As she emerged from the intimate space that had contained only the two of them, her surroundings returned to her. The only piece of furniture in the room a gorgeous four-poster, the sheets tangled on the floor from the intensity of their passion. The floor carpeted in a sea of vases containing an entire garden of lavender roses, James’s re-creation of the night eight months ago that they’d never had together. The walls plastered and ready for paint. And the view beyond their window of the calabash trees backdropping a partially framed cottage, alongside a massive hole in the ground that would soon be a saltwater pool.
Laina buried her face in James’s neck as he stroked her back. She knew he didn’t need to ask her why she was crying. Even months after they’d reunited in his Atlanta hotel room with the fierceness of two colliding trains, these moments still came upon her. The idea that this could have never happened. That they could both be leading their separate lives right now, scorched by the pain of indescribable loss, moving through the world like zombies.
She pulled away to look at James’s face, and he traced her tears with his thumb. “I wish there were better words,” she whispered. “I can’t...”
“Shhh... I know,” he said soothingly. “I know everything.” He locked his eyes on hers as he cupped a hand around her cheek. “I want to show you something.”
She stirred. “Does that mean I have to get dressed?”
“Absolutely not.” He reached down to the floor and picked up two sheets, which they wrapped around themselves. Then James plucked a single rose out of a vase and reached for her hand. “Follow me.”
He led her down the stairs with the sheets trailing behind them. As the burning intensity of her experience receded, real life returned. Laina walked through the living room with a critical eye, observing the new hardwood flooring, the stained-glass windows with the original owner’s initials in them that had been installed just yesterday. It was going to be perfect. Not just because it had been James’s idea, and not just because their collaborative effort was bringing her beloved crumbling house back to life. Because it, along with the six guest cottages built on the property, would be shared with the people who needed it most: those with limited incomes dealing with a terminal illness in their family. The project honored James’s mother, Laina’s passion for social justice, even the house’s former owners with its final completion after all these decades. House of Dreams, her and James’s castle in the sky.
As they walked across the newly restored front porch, James pulled Laina close and covered her eyes.
“What are you doing?” she laughed.
“The sign was installed toda
y. I wanted to surprise you with it.”
Laina’s heart leaped. She’d put her heart and soul into redesigning this place, using all of her skill to create the lowest environmental impact possible, and each new detail that came to life was cause for her celebration. She felt James stop beside her and turn her back toward the house. “Are you ready?” he asked.
“So ready.” She smiled. He moved his hand away from her eyes.
All Laina could do was stare. Her mouth fell open as the impact of what she was seeing hit her fully, and a bubble of emotion burst out of her in a gasp. “Oh my God! James, what—”
He took her hands. She looked from him back to the sign, unable to believe her eyes.
Instead of the words House of Dreams in the font she’d chosen, Will you marry me? had been printed across the arched wooden slab.
And now Laina could hardly breathe, because James was dropping to one knee and looking up at her rapturously. She brought a hand up to fan her face, so overcome with emotion she couldn’t think straight. Was this really happening? Was she dreaming?
“Laina,” James began as his eyes filled with tears. “My life is nothing without you. You are my heart, my breath, my everything.”
Laina’s eyes welled up as James held the single lavender rose up to her. “I asked you once what this symbolizes. It’s love at first sight. And I know now that I’ve loved you from the moment I saw you on that stupid cliff in those damn cutoffs.”
Laina was laughing and crying at the same time, shaking her head and nodding all at once. James opened his hand to reveal a diamond ring. Her breath hitched as he took her left hand, holding the ring at her fingertip. “Make me the happiest man alive, Laina. Tell me you’ll love me forever.”