by Ceri Beynon
“I have also taken it upon myself to ban any form of cheerful music, with only melancholic, or music that reflects the tone of our city being legal”.
Even Calix looks shocked at this, as if he had no idea his father had planned this. I don’t blame him, banning cheerful music? Even some of the audience appear horrified, although they stand and clap nonetheless.
“What about Annabelle? My daughter loves her music” asks a man shyly from the back of the gathering.
“Annabelle is still legal as she plays the exact type of music that personifies the city.”
Thinking back to the parade earlier today, I remember Annabelle’s music as depressing and tormented. I would never want to listen to someone like that. This man tries to take choice away.
“It’s the only way we can pass our values successfully on to the younger children”, he says with an arrogant defiance.
“My son Calix had a few words he would like to say. And with that we will wrap up our conference. I thank you very much again for coming”.
“Good evening ladies and gentlemen. I happen to have some plans of my own for the youth of the city that begin with the library. I would like to encourage reading groups and additional reading hour in the primary schools and for under fourteen year olds.”.
He can even surprise me sometimes, beneath that beauty is brains, depth and compassion. It only makes me more in love and awe of him. He is a marvel of a human being, prince or not. The royalty part with him is just like an added extra, he’d still be wondrous even if he was just ordinary.
He glances at me as he makes his speech and smiles. I see his father glaring at him and then look at me with disgust. Hey! Calix smiles at the crowd to announce that he has finished his speech and they applaud him graciously, although not to the same magnitude that his father received.
The king goes backstage, the audience get up to leave and Calix jumps off the stage, walking over to me as I greet him with a smile. I hug him tightly.
“You were brilliant Calix .I never knew you to be so philanthropic”.
“Well I’m really passionate about education, if my father neglects an area, I try to concentrate on it and he really doesn’t pay education enough attention”.
“And what exactly do you think about his ideas on music and colour?” I ask hoping that he sees some sense on this issue.
“He does take things too far sometimes. The colour law wont really make a different, most people wear black anyway, but I don’t agree with his ideas on music. I love all kinds of music.” I look accusingly at him.
“Calix you have to speak up to him about this. You cannot let him decide what music people want to listen to. You’re the prince, he has to listen to you. You’ll be King one day.”
He looks fearfully at me.
“Honest, Seren, when my father has decided on an idea, nobody can change his mind. I’ve tried countless times to reverse some of his ideas but to no avail .”I’m inclined to believe him.
“How is he allowed to get away with all this stuff? Doesn’t he have people who oppose him?”
“Well there’s The Smiley’s for one. Some people do challenge his ideas, but his supporters are in much more powerful positions than any enemy so they only ever get overruled.” I shake my head in shock.
“Calix you absolutely have to stand up to him. He’s a tyrant. You are in a powerful position. you can influence him, son-to father if nothing else!”
Calix is different when we talk about his Dad. Its like he is afraid of him, like he’s an impossible barrier you just cannot get over. I’m not afraid of him but he’s a challenge. He’s perplexing though because Calix usually is so determined, he’s always made me feel like anything is possible but when it comes to his father, its like nothing is possible. He’s probably learned this from past experiences. In psychology I believe this is called conditioning. Well I’ll change that!
“So what is this place Calix, like a gentleman’s club and why am I the only girl ?”
“Yeah its like that, as well as a conference hall, secret society. Its everything really and yet it looks so very unremarkable, that’s the genius of it! Women don’t usually come here, you are a very rare occurrence.”
“While I was on my way here I saw The Smiley’s. It was hardly a riot, more of a peaceful protest. What does your father have against them?”
“He sees them as a threat to the city. Think about it Seren, it goes against everything we are”.
“Do you like the city as it is? I mean are you happy for it to stay this way forever?” He looks in deep thought for a moment, not entirely sure of the answer himself.
“Well, we certainly are unique I’ll give you that. I love that about this Kingdom. I’ve always seen us as kind of a sanctuary for the broken hearted, the outcasts. Surely that’s not a bad thing” He arches his eyebrow at me and looks smoulderingly hot but I try not to let that distract me from my point.
“So you’re happy with the way your father rules. You think its alright?”. I ask and he sighs.
“Dad takes things to extremes sometimes I realize that, but that’s just how he deals with things. The city’s been this way since I was young Seren, for as long as I remember. I cant really recall what it was like before Mum died although from local history books it certainly wasn’t like this. But I do remember Dad, I remember him when he was different. I do wish he could be the old him again. He’s changed so much since he lost his wife. I think that’s why he rules like he does”.
“What do you mean?” I ask slightly puzzled.
“His obsession with order, the extremities. He worries so much about rioters changing the city, when really all they want is a little more freedom and variety. Its his way or no way now. I guess he’s become a bit of a dictator but that’s because he need to control something .He couldn’t control my mothers death, nothing in his power could stop it. That got to him a lot. I think he used to think himself kind of invincible”.
Calix is so good at understanding human nature, or at least his father. He even makes me have a little sympathy towards the man.
“Don’t be so hard on him Seren, he will probably ease off in time, when he comes to accept he cant control everything”.
“Still Calix, he shouldn’t allow his personal problems to interfere with his rule of the city. People have free will and he’s trying to control that. That’s wrong.”
Calix doesn’t say anything but just looks at me as though upset. Its like he thinks his father needs protecting.
“Do you miss her Calix, your mother?” I ask.
He looks introspective and then answers quietly
“Its sounds wrong to say, but not really. I was really young when she died, I can barely remember her at all”.
“What did the city used to be like. Was it always The City of the Broken?”
“Oh no, not at all. I guess you could just say it was normal, back then people wore anything they wanted to. There was colour, there was buzz. It was more alive ,but at the same time it wasn’t as individual as it is now. You wont find another city like this in the world now. We march to our own beat. It was just like every other city before my father legally changed the name from Dovetown to The City of the Broken, when his heart was broken by the loss of his love. Then he started recruiting anyone who was depressed to join and banned smiling.”
I knew it!
“Why doesn’t anyone just stop him?”
“What you have to understand Seren is that a lot of people are actually happy, if that’s the right word, to live like this. They’ve come here because they are depressed. They feel they fit in here, they’re not oddballs of society. They’re just like everyone else, broken, and that makes them feel normal perhaps for the first time ever in their life”.
Of course, how could I be so stupid. The citizens actually want to stay like this, so maybe The Kings not a dictator after all.
“Is it really what’s best for them though, to be encouraged to be in a permanent stat
e of depression? Its almost like it’s the fashionable thing here to be unhappy”.
He laughs.
“It is kind of like that yeah. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to have a little cheerfulness every now and then, but that will never happen because of…”
“Your Dad” I interrupt him.
“Yeah”.
“I like The Smiley’s, I don’t think they’re bad at all. Well I better go, I still have that assignment to do” I say.
“You really need to plan better, I’ll see you tomorrow”.
“It would be much easier to plan if certain hot princes would stop inviting me to city conferences and balls”. I shake my head mockingly.
“Why exactly did you invite me here tonight anyway Calix. Was it really necessary?”
“Not at all, just another excuse to spend time with you.”
My heart melts at his words and we kiss again.
It still bugs me that Calix thought me depressed enough to qualify as a citizen of the broken. What an unintentional insult! Aren’t those members of the city simply trapped in a cycle of unhappiness, surely they need to be around happy people with a zest of life, not people who reinforce the need to be broken.
Upon finally getting to bed, when I’m asleep, I dream about The King, a black crown, a black heart and Calix.
Chapter Five.
Heart of Ice
At college, we’re going Ice Skating at the big ice rink in the city .Contrasting the City of the Broken to a regular city is insightful.
Coaches have been booked and the whole college is going. Calix is too, I’m hoping he will be on the same bus as me so that we can sit together. When I see him he’s dressed in a black wool coat, with black earmuffs. On anyone else it would look ridiculous, he somehow manages to look suave.
“Are you going ice skating Calix?” I am bubbling with excitement. Calix looks upset, like he’s carrying the universe on his shoulders.
“Are you okay?” I ask when he doesn’t answer my question.
“Yes, fine. Yes I’m going ice skating.” His tone is cold, I can tell instantly something is up. I just frown to myself and get on the bus, hoping he will divulge on the journey.
“Hi Seren, sit next to us” Jasmine says. Charlotte is sitting next to her beckoning me over.
I decide to sit next to them. Calix is clearly in a bad mood anyway so he probably would rather be on his own.
“This is so exciting, yet nerve racking” says Jasmine.
“I know. Have you ever been ice skating before?”
“Yes I went last year. I only clung on to the side of the rink, if I went into the middle I’d just end up on the floor” Charlotte and I laugh, knowing only too well we will soon be in the same situation.
I see Calix come on the bus looking sullen. He spots me sitting next to the girls.
“Are you going to sit by me Seren?” he asks.
“I’m going up the back, come and join me if you want” he says as he floats past looking glamorous and mysterious. His eyebrows and hair dark and thick, like the frame chosen for a masterpiece.
“Why is he asking to sit by you?” I am demanded of when Calix is barely out of earshot.
“Um” is all that I can manage.
“Are you dating?” asks Jasmine in disbelief like it’s the scandal of the century.
“Yeah sort of” I mutter and I can see other girls on the bus looking over interested in why Jasmine and Charlotte are screeching.
“And you didn’t think to tell us?” asks Jasmine not knowing that Charlotte has already been informed.
“I.. um..”
“Go and sit with him now”. Charlotte says bossily.
“Are you sure, I mean, you two don’t mind?” I ask thinking they might be offended by me choosing a guy over them.
“You would be insane if you chose not to sit with him” Jasmine says her eyes beaming
“Just so you two can gossip about me” I say teasingly.
“Yeah that too” says Charlotte enthusiastically.
As I walk towards the back where Calix is sitting, everyone is staring. Everyone knows.
Calix looks as if he’s far away when I sit by him.
“Hi, please tell me what’s up Calix. I can tell something is bothering you”
He sighs but stays silent as if locked in a cage of secrets.
“Calix please” I try again.
“Oh Seren, you just wouldn’t understand.” he says putting his fingers to the bridge of his nose and frowning like he has a headache.
“Oh go on, try me. I promise I will do my best to understand.”
“Whatever it is Ill be sympathetic.” I add on seeing his doubtful glance.
“My Father” he pauses, but of course any problem would always involve him.
“Yes?” I enquire.
“He doesn’t want me to see you anymore Seren”.
My ears seem to have gone dead, everything around me is a blur and I’m sure my heart just skipped several beats. I say nothing.
“Seren” Calix says looking concerned, putting his hand on my hand, which only serves to make me burst into tears ,a reaction that takes even me by surprise.
“Oh Seren, please don’t cry.”
The whole coach is listening. I just want to run away but I cant because we’re on a motorway. I keep gulping. I feel out of control and like I cant breathe. I try taking deep breathes. Calix offers me a bottle of his water. Finally, my tears are overcome by wrath-towards Calix’s father.
“Why doesn’t he want me to see you anymore?” I spit at him.
“Well, he thinks you’re a bad influence on me” Calix says, shocked as he’s never seen me in this much of a temper before.
“He thinks I’m a bad influence on you?” I repeat his sentence slowly as a question spiked with a malice.
“He says that you make me too happy…happier than he’s ever seen me before and he finds that worrying, you know for the city” he says calmly trying not to provoke me further.
I am so horrified, I’m speechless. I just sit there staring at Calix and shaking my head. How dare he! He has no right to tell Calix who to see. How dare he! He should be happy his son is happy and yet he’s trying to prevent his joy. How dare he! Thinking his precious city is more important than his son and that I could possibly be bad influence, how dare he. Calix looks worried as if I might explode or combust or maybe that’s just how I feel.
“Come on Seren, we can try and enjoy today. We’re going ice skating!” he smiles at me and it would make me feel blissful, if it hadn’t been for what he’s just told me.
“Calix how do you think I could possibly enjoy skating after what you’ve just told me? Your father doesn’t want me to see you again!” I stare at him like he doesn’t understand what his father is saying.
“Yes” is the answer I get.
“Well, you’re not going to go along with that are you? Tell him to back off, its none of his business if you want to see me” and suddenly I feel a rush of panic about what Calix’s going to say next.
“Seren, I-” and then he pauses.
Mrs. Shelley, our teacher and head of the ice skating trip interrupts him .No ,not now!
“Now you lot, we’ll have three hours altogether. You’ll have an hour on the ice. If you need help just ask one of the assistants on the rink who’ll be more than happy to explain to you about fitting the shoes and keeping your balance on the ice . Then straight back on the bus, we leave at 3”. she says matter-of-factly.
After Mrs. Shelley’s pep talk, I look longingly at Calix and I can see he hasn’t been listening. He looks in deep, challenging thought. A total dilemma.
“Look Seren, I love being with you. I don’t want to stop seeing you either but at the same time I don’t want to double cross my father. He thinks the joy you bring me goes against everything the city is and I guess that’s true. I’m the Prince, I’m supposed to represent what we are and being happy isn’t a part of that.” He looks disapproving of
himself, like he’s committing some great treachery against the city.
“I know Calix, but you have to live for yourself too. You cant just survive singularly for your father and that city. Besides, just act”.
“Act? You mean…what do you mean?”
“If you just act sad and broken, your father will never know. Either that or tell him to leave you alone. You’re an adult, its up to you to make your own decisions.”
“Acting… yeah I think you’re on to something, both of us can act” he says, a light bulb flashing above his head.
“What do you mean both of us?”
“Well Seren, if I take you to the city and we both look continuously depressed together then my father will approve of you…us. Besides, lets not forget I recruited you in the beginning because I thought you’d fit in perfectly with the city. You always looked so sad, so broken walking around the college. Surely you can look like that again, its always been so natural for you!” Okay, don’t rub it in how much of a reject I looked.
“Yes Calix ,but its different now because since I found you, for the first time in my life, I do actually feel happy. Its so ironic isn’t it?”
“I know, but I have to admit it, its exactly the same with me. I had absolutely no trouble at all being the broken prince, the black prince before . I had no mother, a father who is permanently in a bad mood and a bunch of suitors I had absolutely no interest in. It was so easy to be depressed. Then of course I found you and all of that changed so quickly. I finally had a reason to get up, to live even.”
“Calix is that really the way you feel?” To hear these words coming out of his lips is extraordinary. I had no idea that I’d changed his emotional life in such a way.
“It could work. I guess I’d rather act depressed and actually be full of joy than genuinely be depressed because I’d lost you. Sure we can give it a shot, but are you sure your father’s not just using the unhappy thing as an excuse? I mean did any of the other girls he wanted you to date look too happy?” I ask interested in his response.
He pauses, considering what I’ve just said.