Edmund watched with amusement. “We have made a great deal of progress, but some things will take time.”
Soon Alex and Johnny were on their way back to Splatmore Cottage, the snow falling heavier each minute. The horses tracked through the fresh snow, and Johnny held his mouth wide-open to catch fresh snowflakes.
As he drew the matched greys to a halt before the cottage, Johnny quickly jumped down and ran to the door. Anna opened it and looked surprised to see him there. Alex joined them at the door after tying up the horses.
“Good afternoon, my lady. I have brought an invitation for Miss Lynley and yourself,” Johnny said properly, taking care to enunciate every word.
Anna looked at Alex with a suspicious glance, then held the door open. “Please come in out of the snow, and you may give her the invitation yourself.”
The cottage was warm, with a roaring fire in the hearth, Alex was pleased to see. He and Anna stood just inside the door as he watched Johnny introduce himself to Lucy and hand her the note.
“Mama!” Lucy read the note slowly, as though she was still learning. “May we go?”
“Go where, my dear?”
“Johnny would like a friend to ride and admire horses with, and Isabella will be heartbroken if you refuse her invitation to dinner,” Alex replied.
Anna had a look on her face reminiscent of a mouse trapped by a cat. “I do not understand why you are doing this, but it hardly seems fair to use Lucy against me.”
“Do you not?” he replied coyly. “’Tis the season for sharing our blessings and enjoying one another’s company.”
She murmured indiscernibly and looked out at the heavy snowfall before climbing the stairs.
“I believe we should be on our way,” Alex said to the children before Anna could change her mind.
“Does that mean we can go?” Lucy asked with a wide gap-toothed grin.
“It would seem so. I need to fetch our cloaks, scrub the table and put away the baking.”
“I will bank the fire,” Alex said promptly, setting to. The children cheered and helped to clean the kitchen.
Anna found herself swept up into a whirlwind and she wanted to be angry with Alex, but seeing the pure joy on Lucy’s face kept her silent. The four of them squeezed into the curricle with the hood pulled up, but it provided little protection from the heavy snow. Johnny sat on the other side of Alex, holding the ribbons, and Lucy sat in Anna’s lap. She was acutely conscious of Alex’s warm, strong body next to hers and she trembled. She told herself it was from the cold and certainly not old feelings rekindled! How young and naïve she had been all those years ago. Blindly, her youthful heart had fallen in love and she feared it had never obeyed when told to fall out of that emotion.
Alex leaned over and whispered in her ear. “I know you are displeased with me, but I hope you will be able to enjoy yourself, nevertheless.”
“It was a low trick to bring another child, Your Grace,” she replied quietly, though Johnny and Lucy were chatting happily and would not notice the undercurrent of their conversation.
“Yes it was…” He chuckled. “… But you said no when Isabella asked in the proper fashion.”
She turned to look up at him and their eyes met. It was as though all the years had fallen away. His stormy eyes were close enough that she could see the deep blue rims around the light gray in the center. They had always mesmerized her and she knew she was staring. His breath hitched and brought her back to the present. She turned sharply away.
Despite the heavy snow, they were soon back at Hartmere.
Johnny jumped down; Anna had not even asked to whom the child belonged, so caught up had she been by Alex’s return it had slipped her mind. He was a charming child, and truly seemed to want to be Lucy’s friend. He came around the other side of the carriage and helped her little girl down.
“Such a gentleman you are,” Anna praised.
“Yes, my lady.” He beamed as he moved to Lucy’s good side and offered her his arm. Tucking her hand in the crook of his elbow, she hobbled beside him with her crutch in the other. She looked so small next to him, but he did not seem to mind either that she was younger or crippled.
Anna watched the pair, her heart near to bursting, and did not even notice that Alex was waiting to hand her down.
“I do not think you need to worry about Lucy. Johnny will take care of her,” he murmured.
They walked into the house, which instantly brought back memories of the Christmas she had fallen in love with Alex. It even smelled the same. Greenery, mainly of pine, bay and holly, was entwined around the banister with bright red ribbons, while candles lit the hall. Delicious smells of baking, spices and roasted meats wafted through the house, causing her mouth to water. Johnny and Lucy were speaking to Isabella and her husband, who were explaining the tradition of mistletoe.
“Gracious heavens,” Anna whispered as she looked up.
“Heaven indeed,” Alex said with amusement.
After an initial reluctance and some encouragement, Johnny gave Lucy an innocent peck on the cheek and Isabella’s husband lifted him to pluck one of the white berries from the hanging plant of doom. Anna knew what was coming, yet she could not stop it and, were she being honest, did not want to. She was afraid the next minutes would betray her fully.
“Go on, Uncle!” The little boy shouted encouragement. “Girls smell much nicer than boys.”
Apparently, Alex needed none, for his lips descended to hers. The familiar warmth and softness of his touch was everything she remembered… except for the bushy beard. That tickled, and she found herself laughing, despite feeling as though her world had been overturned in a single day.
He looked down at her, his eyes laughing.
“Your beard tickles.”
“I will shave it off immediately if it means I can have more kisses,” he said roguishly, a hint of the old Alex echoing in his words.
“I rather like it.” As the confession left her lips, she glanced around, conscious of the children and others watching.
“They have gone,” he said with approval in his voice.
She turned back and looked into his eyes. His hands were still on her arms and it felt good to be held, but she stepped away. Her heart would break—again—when he left, but she did not have to make matters harder.
“Anna,” he called, but she kept walking to the drawing room. She needed the safety of company. In all likelihood, her cheeks were red enough to match the curtains and carpet, but she could hardly go anywhere else.
Johnny and Lucy were sitting on the floor, playing Spillikins with Edmund, who was patiently teaching the two children.
Anna watched, trying to be happy for her child while trying not to allow her feelings to show.
“Johnny is our son now.” Isabella spoke as though oblivious of Anna’s distress. “He brought Edmund and I together,” Isabella said with a smile upon her husband as the game finished and he began to read to the children. “Edmund was a vicar and spent a good deal of time rescuing those in need.” Her ladyship did not explain anymore, but Anna suspected there was quite a tale there. She had her own history and did not really wish to speak of it, although it had made her stronger. She could not regret her marriage, for it had brought her Lucy, but it did not mean her other feelings had died.
The children ate dinner with them, one on each side of the duke, and it was a pleasant escape from their new life, where Anna did most of the cooking and cleaning.
“It is growing late,” she said at last. “May we trouble you for a ride back to the cottage?”
“Do you have to leave?” Johnny asked. Anna’s eyes strayed to Lucy’s and she saw the sadness. It had been magical, but all things did, eventually, come to an end.
“I am afraid we must. Tomorrow is Christmas, and after church it will be a full day of cooking dinner,” Anna replied.
“I will send for the carriage,” Alex said, nodding to one of the footmen to take care of the task.
&nbs
p; They adjourned to the hall instead of to the drawing room as would normally be the case. The butler handed them their coats, gloves, and hats while they waited.
The door opened on a rush of freezing wind to the footman, who was covered with snow. He attempted to wipe it off and stamped his boots on the mat.
“I am afraid the snow is too heavy to take the horses out just now, Your Grace,” he said to the duke. He flicked a glance at them, all standing there waiting.
Alex looked at Anna, and gave a little unrepentant shrug. He had known this would happen and she had done too, if she were being honest.
“Does that mean we have to walk home in the snow, Mama?” Lucy gazed up at Anna with her wide blue eyes.
“Of course not,” Johnny answered. “It means you will have to stay here!”
The children were whisked away to the nursery, and Isabella led Anna into the drawing room.
“It will be like old times!” she said.
All Anna could manage was a sad smile. Nothing could bring back the innocents they had been.
The butler brought in a tray of mulled wine with a plate of ginger biscuits, and the rest of the party seated themselves around the fire, a cozy foursome. Years ago, this would have been a dream for her; now, it was torture. She could not look at Alex.
Isabella rose suddenly, bringing the men to their feet. “I am feeling tired after the journey. I will have my maid put out a nightgown and some other things for you,” she said to Anna.
“Thank you,” Anna replied, and also stood to leave. The situation was so awkward.
Edmund took Isabella’s arm and they left the room. Anna turned to follow, but Alex delayed her with his hand on her arm.
“Will you stay a little longer?”
“I am feeling tired, myself,” she prevaricated, aware she would not be able to sleep that night, knowing he was under the same roof.
“I thought we might take a little walk on the terrace, for old times’ sake.”
“Why not?” She found herself answering with her heart. Perhaps it would lay the ghosts of Christmas past to rest.
He gathered their garments from the butler and wrapped her cloak around her. His touch scorched her, despite another rush of freezing wind that hit her in the face when he opened the terrace doors. The snow had only left a slight dusting there, sheltered by a portico and a balustrade.
She remained silent. What was there to say, in truth?
“Can you forgive me, Anna?” he asked, shocking her to her core.
“Cutting straight to the point,” she remarked.
“We are both beyond trivial pleasantries, I believe. If I surmise correctly, neither of us expected to find the other widowed. I put off returning to Hartmere because of what I thought to find. I did not know if I could bear to watch you happy with another man. I have allowed bitterness and anger to fill my heart, and all along I knew it was because I did not stand up to my father and fight for you.”
“It does no good to dwell on the past,” she said softly, but she had needed to hear those words.
“I must confess, Anna, my feelings are unchanged.”
“We are not the same people we were all those years ago, Alex.”
He barked an ironic laugh. “That is the truth, but does it mean we cannot be happy together? Tell me there is hope, Anna. Give us a second chance. Please.”
Chapter Four
Alex had not meant to say those things, but somehow, he knew he might never have another chance with Anna. The truth was, he had used Johnny and Lucy for the chance to spend some time with her, along with some divine intervention in the form of a snowstorm. However, he knew she was not indifferent to him, even though she might wish to deny it. She had betrayed herself with that kiss under the mistletoe. Nevertheless, it did not mean she would forgive him for the past.
“I will not press you. I wished you to know my feelings.”
She bit her lower lip and then turned and walked away for the second time that night.
What was he to do?
He stayed outside, watching the snow fall until his face began to prickle with numbness. At length, he made it to his bed, but he lay awake a long time that night, tormented by a mixture of hope and desperation over what to do.
The next morning was Christmas, and his room was filled with extra brightness from the sun glistening off the snow. He rose and walked over to the window, remembering Joshua’s excitement at fresh snow and the treats to be had for Christmas dinner. There would be no going to church that day due to the thick white blanket, but fortunately they had their own vicar in residence for the festive season. After he had dressed, he left his rooms. Hearing the chatter of young voices, he looked up to the nursery floor to see two cherubic faces smiling down at him.
“Good morning,” he called.
“A merry Christmas to you, sir!” Johnny called back. “May we come downstairs, sir?”
“Of course,” Alex replied. Perhaps the nursery maid was still sleeping, or perhaps there was no one up there with them.
Remembering being a child on Christmas here once himself, he felt a little mischievous. He whispered loudly, with his hands on either side of his mouth.
“You may even slide down the banister, since no one is looking, and I will catch you!”
He could see the hesitation and fear on Lucy’s face, while at the same time a certain longing.
“Help her up there, Johnny. I promise to catch you, Lucy!”
The squeal of glee the little girl made was worth any reprimand he would receive from her mother later.
Alex had just managed to catch her and put her on her feet when Johnny followed. His force was much greater and he almost knocked Alex over. He sat down dramatically with the boy in his hands, pulling Lucy down with them. They were all rolling in a pile of giggles when the others came from their chambers to see what was happening.
“Is everything quite well?” Anna called, leaning over the banister and looking enchanting with her curls hanging around her face. Alex wanted to see that every morning.
“Everything is perfect,” he called. “Good Christmas morning to you!”
Anna looked suspicious, but she smiled at them. “I will be down in a few minutes.” Edmund and Isabella had already returned to their chamber.
“Shall we ask Cook for some chocolate and see what other treats she has made for us?” he asked, standing up, then scooping each child into his arms. He descended with them to the kitchen, where he placed them each on a stool at the table. Alex, Michael, and Isabella had always been welcome in the kitchens, and Cook always saved a few tasks for them to perform on Christmas morning. As he had suspected she would, she smiled brightly when she saw the children.
“Come to help, have you? It just so happens I still have some baking left to do.”
“Biscuits? Mince pies?” Johnny asked.
“All of them, as it happens.”
It was not long until Edmund, Isabella, and Anna joined them in the kitchen. Despite the aristocratic lineage of the adults, they were swiftly children again, eating as much as they were making. Flour soon dusted cheeks and noses, and fingers were sticky. It was a scene Alex had never thought to experience again.
“I wish Michael could have been here. It is like old times, except for his absence,” Isabella said.
“His wife is lying in,” Alex explained to Anna.
“I suspect we will hear news any day,” Cook answered.
“A joyous occasion,” Edmund remarked. He popped the last bite of a warm biscuit in his mouth and smiled.
“Since we appear to be snowed in, will you do us the honor of reading the Christmas story to us?” Alex asked his brother-in-law.
“I think that is an excellent idea, and Johnny and Lucy may help.”
They removed to the small estate chapel, where those servants not occupied in the kitchen had gathered for a short service. There were only six pews, divided by a central aisle, and an altar at the front with a stained-glass image of
a cross shining down on it.
“Look, Mama!” Lucy called Anna over to where Edmund had said she and Johnny could put together the Nativity scene as he read the story.
Isabella and Alex joined her. Then he led the ladies to their seats on the front pew. Edmund began to read of the birth of Christ from the Bible. It was not a formal service, but one Anna would treasure. She watched the two children place each object with care, Lucy placing the baby Jesus in the manger.
Edmund led them in the hymn, “While Shepherds Watched Their Flocks by Night,” then “Hark! the Herald Angels Sing,” before leading them in a prayer. As they returned to the house, they sang some of the more spirited carols, including “Joy to the World” and “We Wish You a Merry Christmas,” which the children were able to join in with glee.
The house smelled divine with the promise of a feast yet to come. “Is it time for the goose, Papa?” Johnny asked Edmund.
“No, that is for this evening.”
“Perhaps we may play in the snow, if the children do not mind the cold?” Alex suggested.
“Yes, please!” Lucy and Johnny both exclaimed.
“Then hurry along and bundle into your coats and hats. I will send for the sleigh we keep for use in this weather, to take us to the best hill on the estate for my purpose. I have a surprise for you both.”
Alex watched as Johnny knelt down and Lucy climbed on to his back. He felt Anna tense next to him, but he touched her arm to offer reassurance. “I used to carry Michael and Isabella that way,” he whispered.
She nodded warily as she watched, but Johnny was being careful. “Johnny is good for her, I must admit. He treats her far more normally than the village children do.”
“Will you join us? Whilst in Canada I came across a pastime the children will much enjoy. In some parts of the country, the snow lies for most of the year, leading to the need to slide down hills in it for sport.”
“I will come, but merely to watch. Excuse me while I fetch the pelisse Isabella so kindly lent me yesterday. This gown is pretty but hardly sufficient against the day’s cold.”
Alex watched Anna climb the stairs, musing over the change within himself in a couple of days. He had returned with no expectation of finding Anna free, and somehow everything had changed.
O Night Divine: A Holiday Collection of Spirited Christmas Tales Page 56