by David Liss
“Interim Director Junup has little faith that you can conduct yourselves properly with reduced supervision,” Ardov announced once we were off the ground. “But Boridi op Xylliac insisted on conducting this meeting at his residence, so we have no choice. I expect all of you to be on your best behavior. I know it’s sometimes difficult for primitive species to resist their violent, disruptive impulses, but you’re going to have to try. Frankly, I think it’s a risk taking all of you out of the compound.” He then turned away, like he was startled by something.
Or maybe embarrassed, because it seemed to me that he’d just drawn attention to something very peculiar. Why, exactly, were Steve and Tamret along for this ride? They hadn’t been on the Kind Disposition. Junup had said something about using them as character witnesses, but I thought he’d meant to get Villainic to testify against us. Something wasn’t right here.
I leaned over to Colonel Rage, who was sitting next to me, and I very quietly pointed this out to him.
His one eye went wide with alarm. “Yeah, that’s a good point, son,” he said quietly. “Kind of makes me worried.”
“Worried about what?” I whispered.
“That they’re putting us all together so something can happen.”
“If you have something to say,” Ardov snapped, “speak loud enough that the whole shuttle can hear you.”
“Are you feeling excluded, Ardov?” I asked.
“It is the sort of tribal behavior I’d expect from lower forms of life,” he said. “But I’m afraid I can’t have you whispering. Also, I’ve closed down your personal comm channels on your bracelets. The last thing I need is for you to plot some kind of foolish escape.”
“Where would we escape to?” I asked.
He sneered at me, as though I’d been immature to point out the absurdity of his accusation. “I don’t expect you to behave rationally.”
I sighed and leaned back. Colonel Rage and I exchanged a glance. There was nothing more we could say now, but we were both keeping our eyes open. It seemed increasingly likely that we were heading into a trap.
• • •
It took us about twenty minutes to get to our destination. I’d never paid much attention to the mountains surrounding the city on my last visit, but now that I knew that Ghli Wixxix, and apparently Dr. Roop, wanted us to venture into undeveloped wilderness at the periphery of the domed platform, I found myself looking out the window at the jagged and stony peaks to the far horizon. There was a desert out there, hot and barren and dangerous. From our position dozens of miles away, it looked like no one could last long in that wasteland.
Finally the shuttle set down on a landing pad atop a tall, cylindrical building with a bright green metallic exterior. We filed out of the shuttle and into the building and then into a large elevator that opened directly into Boridi op Xylliac’s apartment.
I immediately got the sense that serving on the Xeno-Affairs Judicial Council must be a pretty good deal, because Boridi op Xylliac had some sweet digs. The place was large, with huge windows that presented a view of the sprawling city and the wilderness beyond. There were furnishings that might have been expensive—I didn’t really know what counted as fancy in the Confederation—and various works of holographic art. Even without knowing the cost of the individual objects, I had no doubt that this was the apartment of a very wealthy being.
The name Boridi op Xylliac hadn’t meant much to me, but now that I saw him, I recognized him instantly. He was a large, dare I say rotund, fellow, with mottled red-and-black skin and slight protrusions, reminiscent of stubby horns, on his forehead. During my previous visit to the Confederation, I’d thought of him as looking like Darth Maul, if Darth Maul had been a clown. He looked a little silly, but more than once he’d taken my side against Junup, which made him okay in my book.
He wore a red suit that matched the red parts of his skin, and he looked happy to see us. He opened his arms. “Welcome, friends,” he exclaimed. “Do come in. Peace officers, there is no way for them to escape, and I do not fear for my safety, so please remain here while I lead my guests inside.”
Ardov stepped forward. “Director Junup has asked me to remain with the primitives at all times.”
“We would not want Interim Director Junup to worry, now, would we?” Boridi op Xylliac said. “Come along, then. Come along.” He led us into another room, and then down a hallway, and finally to another large, open area, with numerous chairs, oval couchlike things, and tables set up with plenty of food.
“Look around, friends! Look around! In my apartment you will see what I believe is the finest collection of primitive art in the Confederation.”
There were paintings on the walls, large metal sculptures in the corners, and carvings of wood and stone on the tables and shelves. Some of them looked fairly simplistic, but most of them looked like variations of ordinary art you might see in a museum on Earth. Maybe I didn’t find any of it strange because I was, myself, a primitive.
“I have ordered refreshment for our chat,” Boridi op Xylliac continued. “As you can see, there is plenty of replicated animal flesh upon which you may feast. Oh, and you, my Ish-hi friend,” he said to Steve. “I know you prefer flesh to be alive and fearing its demise when you force it to succumb to your power.”
“I might do,” Steve said warily. “Hadn’t really thought of it that way.”
Boridi op Xylliac strode across the room, grabbed what looked like a small rectangular fish tank, and handed it to Steve. Inside, it was crawling with creatures that looked like furry shrimp, each one about as long as my finger. Steve took the tank in one hand, fished out a creature with the other, and popped it in his mouth.
“Bit early in the day for sweets,” he told Boridi op Xylliac, “but these are quite good.”
I wasn’t really in the mood to eat the animal flesh Boridi op Xylliac had thoughtfully provided, and no one else seemed to be either. After Steve threw a few more hairy shrimp into his mouth, we all took our seats. Boridi op Xylliac remained standing in the middle of the room.
“Now,” he said, “I would love to show you my collection of primitive kitchen implements, gathered from some of the most backward planets in the galaxy. I know they would make you feel very much at home. Who is up for examining some ladles?”
“How about we get down to business,” said Colonel Rage.
“Certainly.” Boridi op Xylliac rubbed his large hands together. “I admire your simplistic rejection of manners.”
“It’s how we primitives do things,” the colonel said.
“Charming! Now, as you know, we must make a full investigation into what happened aboard the Kind Disposition. This is not an official inquiry, of course, but I am recording this session, and what you say will become part of the public record, so you must consider your words as equivalent to testimony. However, this is a friendlier venue than an official hearing, and I hope you will feel more relaxed and candid and free to speak using the colorful local idioms of your own cultures.”
We were all silent for a long time. Colonel Rage had his hands clasped and he was looking at the space between his knees. We all knew what we had to do if we had any hope of Junup letting us leave the station, but getting things started was not going to be easy. It was one thing to decide you were going to be the guy who helps a weasel escape punishment and rise to power, but it was another thing to actually do it.
So, here we all were, trying to figure out what we valued more—justice or our own lives. No, scratch that. I think everyone else was thinking what I was. If it were just me, I’d go for justice and take my chances, but I couldn’t ruin everyone else’s chances to get away.
“Can this be?” Boridi op Xylliac asked. “No one wishes to speak?”
I opened my mouth to say something, but I couldn’t make any sounds come out.
Villainic looked around the room. He then cleared his throat. “It is my understanding that everyone who was on that ship regrets his or her actions that led to its des
truction. Indeed, I have often heard them say that Interim Director Junup is in no way to blame for what transpired.”
There was a long silence.
“Interim Director Junup,” Boridi op Xylliac said, articulating each syllable as though it were a hammer blow, “was not on the Kind Disposition, so why do you raise his name?”
Villainic looked somewhat sheepish. “I only want to emphasize that the mayhem, while perhaps not caused by these good beings from Earth, can in no way be blamed on the Interim Director, nor on anyone who might have been following his orders.”
“And who are you precisely?” Boridi op Xylliac asked.
“Ah,” said Villainic, who now rose and began doing those fancy things with his hands and feet. It did not get any less stupid with repetition. “I am Villainic, Fifth Scion of House Astioj, Third Rung of the Caste of the Elevated.”
Tamret began to study the inside of her sleeve. She looked very much like someone who wished she could fold herself into a paper airplane and fly herself away.
“How interesting,” Boridi op Xylliac said. “I find your gestures and the implications of your culture fascinating. But I am not certain what you are doing at this meeting.”
Ardov cleared his throat. “Chief Justice, Director Junup thought that, because of your interest in primitive species, you might enjoy the company of the Ish-hi and the Rarels.”
“I see,” said Boridi op Xylliac. “Very thoughtful of him. I must say it also appears that the interim director has coached these beings on what they should say to me.”
“I don’t believe he would do so,” said Ardov. “Director Junup does not behave unethically. It is, in my opinion, disrespectful and disloyal to imply otherwise.”
There was another long silence, this time because there was nothing any of us could say. If we were to launch into our script in which we covered up the mutiny, we would only look like idiots, parroting what Villainic had just said. If we confirmed that the mutiny had taken place, we would be giving up our only possible means of escape. As odd as it seemed, Villainic’s blunder had actually gotten us off the hook.
After a few more minutes of sitting and saying nothing, Boridi op Xylliac coughed politely. “Perhaps this gathering was not the best of ideas. I was foolish to think that Junup would not have made promises or threats or otherwise poisoned any chance of candid conversation. We shall have to reconvene this inquiry in a more formal setting, but I can assure you that my investigation into Junup’s role in the destruction of that ship shall be most vigorous. Something is horribly wrong here, and while I believe a crime has been committed, I do not think it is you simple-minded and kindhearted primitives who are to blame.”
“Let’s not be too hasty,” Colonel Rage attempted.
Boridi op Xylliac stood up. “I shall now excuse myself. Please partake of the refreshments to your satisfaction. You may show yourselves out when you are done.” With that, the chief justice rose and departed from the room.
Ardov looked at Villainic. “You are a complete moron,” he said.
Normally I’d have been in favor of a conflict between these two, but in this case I was still so full of relief, I thought I ought to come to Villainic’s rescue. “Give him a break. It’s not like any of us are trained at this. He made a mistake. That’s all.”
“Of course you would defend him,” Ardov said. “He just saved you from having to . . .” His voice trailed off. “I can’t believe I didn’t see it earlier. You told him to do that, didn’t you?”
“No, that was one hundred percent Villainic,” I said.
Ardov was now striding toward me. “Of course you did. That seems to be exactly the sort of thing you would do. You’re given two options, and you come up with some sneaky way to achieve some third choice.”
That is kind of like you, Smelly said.
Villainic stood up and placed himself between me and Ardov, which was kind of a brave thing to do. “No, I can promise you that Zeke did not tell me to say anything. I’m honestly not sure what I did wrong, but I can tell you the blame is mine alone.”
Ardov studied him for a moment. “You just may be stupid enough to be telling the truth.”
“I agree,” I said, “so stop giving him a hard time.”
Ardov looked at the two of us and smirked. “It won’t make much of a difference at this point, anyhow. Let’s go.”
We all followed him out the room, Steve going last, taking a moment to grab a fistful of hairy shrimp.
• • •
Having accomplished nothing beyond getting a nice view of the city and a partial tour of Boridi op Xylliac’s apartment, we went back up to the roof and climbed into the shuttle. The peace officers made certain we got on board but did not get in with us, which I found strange, but I couldn’t quite figure out why.
We were quiet for the first few minutes of the trip. It was Colonel Rage who finally spoke. “Obviously, that didn’t go as intended,” he said to Ardov. “I hope you’ll report to your boss that we didn’t mean for things to happen this way.”
Ardov shrugged like it didn’t much matter to him.
“Is this going to interfere with what Junup had in mind for us?” the colonel pressed. I guess he didn’t want to mention the fake escape plan out loud, in case there was some kind of monitoring on board the shuttle.
Ardov grinned. “I have a feeling this meeting will prove largely irrelevant.”
That meat sack wants to kill you, Smelly said.
I put my hand to my mouth and mumbled so no one would hear. “No kidding.”
I don’t mean abstractly. Its heart rate is accelerated, its senses hyperalert. It is about to do something that I suspect none of us will much like.
I looked out the window and noticed that we were flying over a strange part of the city. Below us the buildings were low and had a ragged look to them. The streets were dirty. Junked shuttles and ground vehicles lay here and there where they’d been abandoned. This wasn’t the way we’d come. There was also a shuttle flying extremely close to us. Usually they kept a good twenty-five feet or so between each other, but this one was almost touching, less than five feet away.
I was about to ask what was going on when there came a chime from Ardov’s bracelet. He sighed. “That’s my cue. I wish I could say I was sorry to see you go, but I’m not.”
A trapdoor in the roof slid open. Cool air began to gush inside, and our faces were blasted by wind. Ardov unbuckled and stood up. “In case you haven’t figured it out yet, this shuttle is programmed to crash. It would have been better if you’d exonerated Junup before you died, but this will have to do.”
Using his augmented skills, Ardov crouched and leaped upward fifteen feet, through the trapdoor and onto the roof. “Let’s see you cheat your way out of this, Zeke,” he called down. Then he leaped from our shuttle to the one next to us.
We all looked around. Everyone was too stunned to move. And then, at the exact same moment, Tamret and I unbuckled and ran to the main control panel.
“He wasn’t bluffing,” she said, her fingers dancing on the console. “We’re programmed to crash.”
“I don’t see a work-around,” I said as I read through the displays. “We’re locked out of the shuttle’s programming by an encryption code. Can you do something?” I turned away from her as I said it. The question was really directed to Smelly.
The encryption is extremely complicated. I can break it in six minutes, but we are programmed to crash in less than five.
“There’s not enough time,” Tamret said. “I’d need close to ten minutes, and we’ve got just under five.”
I looked out the window. The other shuttle was keeping pace with us. I guess it wanted to make certain we went down as planned.
Ardov would have had to program the shuttle when we came on board. There is a better than 99.8 percent likelihood that he has the encryption code.
“Ardov will have the code,” I said aloud.
I stood up and look at the gaping hole i
n the roof. One of us was going to have to go get it. Rarels were stronger and more agile than humans, but I wasn’t about to ask Tamret to do anything that risky, and I didn’t trust Villainic to get it done. There really only was one being for the job.
I looked over at Steve, but he was already unbuckling. “Right,” he said. “I’ll hop over there, smack Ardov around, and message back the code.”
Go with him, Smelly said.
“What?”
“You don’t think I should go?” Steve asked.
“I don’t think I should go,” I said.
Steve set his dark lizard eyes on me. “No offense, mate, but no one suggested that you’re up to this.”
I wouldn’t put you in harm’s way, Smelly said. You know that. I have too much to lose. But I don’t think one being is going to be able to get the job done. You need to go with that reptile. It’s not good to do too often, but I can augment some of your physical abilities. I’ll get you through it.
There wasn’t a whole lot of time to play around with. I did not like the idea of getting up on the roof of a shuttle that was cruising about five thousand feet in the air. On the other hand, Smelly wouldn’t be risking my life, and its own existence, if it didn’t think I could do what needed doing. And finally, and probably most convincing, was that it was one thing to send Steve into danger because he was the only one who could go; it was another thing to sit back and do nothing when I’d just been told I could help get the job done.
Discussion time was over. Steve didn’t jump up through the trapdoor like skill tree–hacked Ardov. Instead, quick as a cockroach, he climbed up the side of the shuttle, skittered along the ceiling, and was out the door. I stood under the gaping hole, trying to decide how I was going to get up there. Then, just like that, a platform from the floor rose up and lifted me. It happened so quickly that I hardly had time to understand it. One second I was standing in the shuttle looking up at the sky, and the next I was up there with Steve.