by Kova, Elise
“Kiss me and we’ll both make it out of this unscathed.”
She had two seconds to debate. Two seconds to decide. There was movement in the corner of her eye as a booted foot crossed into the intersection of the halls.
Eira wrapped her arms around Cullen’s shoulders and brought her lips to his.
12
The moment her lips touched his, all caution was thrown to the wind. Her back was flush against the wall as Cullen pressed forward, claiming her mouth with all the bold tenacity of a lover. Eira’s eyes opened in shock and then she forced them shut once more. Her fingers dug into his shoulders, surprised to find sturdy muscle underneath all the lux fabrics he wore as armor to guard against the lessers of the world.
Lessers like you, a nasty voice in the back of her mind whispered.
His hand was in her hair. Eira didn’t know when it had moved from her waist, but his nails were now against her scalp, threatening to draw out a sound that Eira—under no circumstances—had ever intended to make. Especially not with Cullen.
Prince Romulin cleared his throat with a soft, “Ahem.”
Cullen pulled away abruptly, panic in his eyes. The panic she believed to be real. They weren’t out of the woods yet. The faint flush to his cheeks was certainly an act. However, her own flush, that was very, very real.
“I, uh…Mother above,” Cullen groaned with embarrassment. “Forgive us, Your Highness.” He bowed low.
“These things happen.” The prince wore a grin as if he could relate all too well to sneaking off into dark hallways. “But this area is technically off limits.”
“I know…I, we…”
“I won’t report you to the guard for trespassing into the royal wing. Take your time, collect yourselves, and head back to court. Though I recommend you find a different dark corner for any future urges that can’t be ignored.”
As the two men spoke, Eira’s attention was on Ferro. His violet eyes shone brightly, as if amused, but his brow was furrowed. The elfin’s face was in conflict, as if it couldn’t make up his mind on what reaction he wanted to have toward this discovery.
Eira bit her lip to keep herself from saying something to Ferro and ruining Cullen’s effort. She could still taste Cullen’s mouth on hers and, for some reason, it only made her want to assure Ferro more that things weren’t as they seemed.
“You are too generous, Your Highness.” Cullen bowed again.
Eira mumbled apologies and curtsied. When she raised her eyes, she only caught one more glimpse of Ferro before he disappeared through a door.
Cullen heaved a sigh of relief. “That was close.”
“Would he really have reported us to the guard?”
“Technically, he could’ve. Or he could’ve investigated further and figured out what we were really doing and revoked our pins. Or, just revoked them because trespassing is unbecoming of competitors.” Cullen pressed a finger into the pin over her chest. “And I doubted you wanted to risk that.”
“No.”
“Still, I apologize for the kiss.” Cullen took a long step away and started back toward the court.
Eira raked her fingers through her hair, making sure it was in place. The motion brought back the memory of his nails on her scalp. She shivered and barely resisted telling him not to apologize. It had been a long time since she was kissed…and she’d never been kissed like that.
“It’s all right. I understand.”
As he was putting the chain back in place, he paused. “That wasn’t your first kiss, was it?”
Eira rolled her eyes. “Of course it wasn’t.”
“Oh, thank the Mother, I would’ve felt awful. I knew you were inexperienced but—”
“How did you ‘know I was inexperienced?’” Eira grabbed his elbow, stopping him.
“Well, given how you were all over Adam…and he said…” His eyes were shifty, looking anywhere but her.
Eira gave him a jerk, summoning his full attention to her. “Listen, here’s the thing that I don’t even think Adam grasped—he was the first man I loved.” The words were like glass, every last one. They tore up her throat and made it hard to keep speaking. But something about airing her truth felt good. Felt long overdue. Perhaps she could only say these words because they had crossed a line that put Cullen closer than anyone had come to her in a long time, even if that line had been crossed by acting and nothing more. “I didn’t desire him in a carnal way. If I merely wanted satisfaction of that nature I’d find it elsewhere or give it to myself.”
Cullen stared at her in what Eira could only describe as morbid fascination.
“I’m not fragile. I’m not ignorant to the ways of the world. I was hurt that day; not because I didn’t get a man, or because he cared for someone else—I was hurt because he made a mockery of me and my feelings. Feelings I had cherished. He dared to make me never want to feel again,” Eira finished.
Cullen stared at her. She waited in silence for his judgment for an agonizing minute. When it was clear he had nothing more to say, Eira left him and the court gladly behind.
* * *
She’d been prepared for her brother to say something about how things had ended with Cullen. But he never did. Not when she told him everything she’d seen about the course. And not in the days that followed.
Either Cullen had told Marcus and sworn him to secrecy, or Cullen had kept their encounter, and all she’d said, solely between them. Eira didn’t know which she liked least. The idea Marcus would take Cullen’s side over hers and keep his secrets over checking if she was okay. Or the idea that Cullen may have the ability to respect her—that he may be a better man than she’d given him credit for. And if that was the case, that opened the possibility that she’d been wrong about him in other ways.
Those thoughts about Cullen being decent were born from the lingering haze of the kiss, surely. It had been a good kiss. The best she’d had. Eira’s more sensual experiences had been limited to a few summers of explorations with one of the handsome young sailors who were in and out of port. Nothing serious…but a few good nights in the bunch that were worth thinking about from time to time.
So Eira strove to put the whole day from her mind. She focused on her work and studies. She spent time with Alyss, sharing space quietly in their own corners. And all too fast, it was the night before the second trial and a letter was waiting on her pillow after dinner.
It had arrived as mysteriously as the last. No sign of its sender. Just like before, it was unsigned, but the seal told her as much who it was from as the elegant script within that read,
Meet me in our lounge.
Our lounge. For some reason her eyes kept snagging on those words as Eira waited for the right time to sneak out of the Tower and through the palace. It wasn’t really “theirs.” It was a random lounge that Ferro had found, or been given for his time in the palace.
But she had to admit that after their first night there it had become a special place in her mind. It had seemed more magical than the Tower then…and now, as Eira stood in the doorway, staring at the back of Ferro’s head.
“Come in,” he said in that smooth accent of his.
“How did you know it was me?” Eira asked and closed the door behind her.
“Your heartbeat.” Ferro looked up from the book he was reading as she rounded the chairs.
“My…heartbeat?”
“Yes, it has a flutter unique to you. I think I’d notice it anywhere.” He motioned to the seat she’d assumed last time. Eira sat once more.
“If you could hear it from across the room, then—”
“I noticed when you sneaked out of the court…and I heard you before Prince Romulin and I reached the end of the hall.” Ferro didn’t mince words. It was what she’d expect of a dignitary. But that didn’t stop Eira from cringing inwardly. She quickly vowed to tackle the situation head on.
“About that…”
“I wouldn’t judge someone for a kiss in the shadows.” Ferro chuckled
. His eyes shone intently in the firelight, accented by the orange like a purple sunset right before nightfall. “However, all week I’ve been mulling it over. I can’t seem to escape the image.”
“Why?” Eira’s throat felt tight. He’d been thinking about her all week—more specifically, her kissing Cullen. What did that mean?
“Because you do not strike me as the sort of woman who scampers into the shadows to steal kisses.”
“What kind of woman do I strike you as?” she dared to ask.
“A woman of purpose and goals. A woman who wouldn’t be afraid to kiss whomever she chose in the open.” Ferro rested the book on the table between them and settled back in his chair. Eira noted the title of the manuscript—History of the Crystal Caverns. Ferro continued before she could make note of his topic choice. “Which led me to investigate, and I think I found the answer to my question of why Eira scampered off the moment court was distracted by my arrival.”
“Which is?”
“You were looking for a leg up on the next trial.” Ferro’s mouth curled into a grin as Eira felt panic crash down on her. “And I think you found your advantage in an old court viewing room that overlooks the training grounds.”
Her stomach churned around the dinner she’d eaten, turning it into bile that threatened to escape. She’d known cheating had been a terrible idea and she’d done it anyway. But he didn’t have to know that she’d already told Marcus of her findings. She could take the fall and Marcus would still have the edge he wanted. He’d take her as some kind of page or assistant to Meru. She could salvage the situation.
Eira stood, pulling the pin from her breast. She held it out to Ferro. He dragged his eyes from the offering to her face.
“What do you expect me to do with this?” He arched his eyebrows.
“You’re right,” Eira admitted. “I went and saw the course. I know some of what’s waiting for me tomorrow and because of that I have an unfair advantage. I acted—”
“As I would expect a candidate to act,” Ferro interrupted firmly. A mischievous glint had spread from his grin to his eyes. “Put your pin back on. I’m not going to disqualify you.”
“But—”
“Let me assure you, I haven’t told anyone else of this discovery.” He chuckled as Eira returned the pin to her breast and sat. Ferro leaned in his chair, resting his elbow on the armrest, chin on his knuckles. “You amuse me, dear Eira.”
Dear Eira. The words swirled around her. She wanted to duck her head under and spend forever in the currents of this feeling. A game of pretend was beginning—Eira knew it was. She would pretend that Ferro had a genuine interest in her. She would bask in this fantasy as long as he would let her, knowingly or otherwise. Doing so wouldn’t hurt anyone, so why not?
“I suppose I could say the feeling is mutual,” she said. “I would expect anyone else to revoke my pin.”
“It is part of my role here to make sure the Trial of Five Kingdoms is an impressive display of power, and is entertaining to watch for the gathered masses. To that end, I do not want to see competitors be chosen who are unwilling to fight. I want competitors who are resourceful, cunning, and hungry. Competitors who want victory or nothing and will do anything to get it.”
Eira turned the words over in her head. Would she hunt victory at all costs? She supposed she already had her answer. She’d made that choice at court.
“To that end, I want to help you.” Ferro ran the tips of his long fingers across his lips in thought. Eira was fixated on the unintentionally sensual motion. “How about we make another exchange tonight? What do you know of the forests and mountains around Solarin?”
“A good deal. My grandparents live in the woods on the outskirts of Rivend.”
“Rivend isn’t far from where the Crystal Caverns once were, by my recollection.”
“They’re not.” Eira glanced to the fire, distracted by a memory she hadn’t thought of in some time.
“What is it?” Ferro, of course, caught the motion. She wondered if his pointed ears could hear her thoughts almost as well as her heartbeat.
“A family story… The mention of the Crystal Caverns made me recall something my mother told me once. After the rise of the Mad King and the sacking of Solarin, Empress Vhalla—though she was still a commoner, then—and Emperor Aldrik actually took shelter in my grandparents’ home.”
“An impressive page to have in the tome of your family’s history.”
“I thought so when I first heard it. But it seems normal now.”
Ferro chuckled. “It’s funny how quickly things can become normal. I have already grown accustomed to the mountain chill and Solaris cuisine.”
Eira nodded. “In any case… Yes, I know about the rebuilding. My grandparents are still in that home. One of my aunts is in Rivend. And I grew up in Oparium, which is to the—”
“Southwest,” he finished. “You mentioned last time that you hail from Oparium.” Eira couldn’t recall if she had or hadn’t. But she must’ve. How else would he have known? “I took the liberty of reading up on Solarin’s port and that’s what prompted my fascination of the time following the downfall of the Crystal Caverns and the rebuilding. So, if you tell me what you know through your experiences and family’s stories, I will impart some additional knowledge that will assist you tomorrow.”
“You’ll help me cheat?” Even though they were the only ones in the large room, Eira’s voice dropped to a whisper. Every shadow felt like it was listening.
“I am technically an organizer. I don’t think it can be counted as cheating if I give information to whomever I deem fit.”
Eira mulled this over. Perhaps he was right? Ferro had no reason to show her favoritism. Marcus had his own advantages from Fritz already. Really, she was just leveling the playing field as her brother was her only real threat. Eira’s logical contortion stretched far to justify her actions.
“But,” Ferro continued, “I do want to stress again that no one can know of these meetings.”
“I doubt anyone would think you’ll help me cheat.”
“I don’t want anyone to think poorly of you at all,” he said smoothly. “If anything, I’d like to protect you.”
“Protect me?” she repeated, heart fluttering.
“Yes.” Ferro shifted in his seat, glancing away from her as conflict took over his features. “You know how a young woman meeting a man in the dead of night might look.”
Did she ever. That was exactly what was becoming the foundation of some of her new fantasies. Her imagination went wild when his violet eyes returned to her and Ferro gave her an almost longing look through his lashes.
“I want to see that your honor as a competitor and a woman is preserved.”
“Thank you,” she somehow managed to say. Her throat was gummy.
“So we will continue keeping these meetings secret? No matter what’s said?”
“Of course,” Eira said quickly, perhaps too quickly. “You have a deal, Ambassador. I don’t want these meetings to stop.”
“Good. I knew you wouldn’t let me down. Just like I know you won’t let me down tomorrow in your run.” He eased back in his seat, relief taking over his face. Pride swelled in her. “One last thing.”
“Yes?”
“Call me Ferro. Ambassador seems too stiff to be used between friends.”
“Are we friends?” Her heart might not be able to handle the answer.
“I would like to be, if that’s all right by you?”
“More than.” Eira couldn’t stop a smile and it only grew larger as Ferro returned it.
“Now, about this obstacle course. There are a few tricky segments you’ll want to think about how you’ll tackle before going out there…”
Eira tried to commit his every word to memory. She repeated several of the key elements back to him to make sure she understood. The entire time Ferro was patient, allowing her to phrase things several ways and question the more particular parts of the course. Especially
the parts that seemed…shockingly dangerous.
But this competition was a friendly display to celebrate unity. Eira trusted that they wouldn’t allow anything too dangerous to transpire.
After, she answered his questions about the aftermath of the Mad King Victor and what happened to the Crystal Caverns. Solarin had been in a rough state, as was most of the southern tip of the Empire. Oparium had remained fairly insulated, which helped get the capital back on its feet faster, since Oparium could support sea trade with Norin—the old capital of the West.
On Eira’s second yawn of the night, Ferro stood and said, “I should allow you to turn in. It won’t do if you’re too exhausted to perform tomorrow.”
Eira stood and stretched. “I wish we could talk all night.” She sighed wistfully and, as Ferro’s expression shifted into something thoughtful, her words registered. “I…I didn’t mean… What I meant to say was—”
“I feel the same,” Ferro said softly. The words had a tender ache that hollowed out something in her gut. Something she desperately needed filled. “It is lonely here. You’re one of the few who will speak with me. And, among those who will share a word with me, none do so candidly as you.”
“I apologize for how Solaris is treating you.”
He shook his head. “It’s understandable. I am still seen as the strange outsider.” Ferro forced a smile. She knew it was forced, because she had practiced such smiles in the mirror many times. “It will get better. Hopefully, the tournament will help ease tensions between our nations. I shudder to think of what might happen if Meru and Solaris had picked up swords rather than the pen.”
“As do I.” Eira crossed, starting for the door, but she stalled. Ferro slowed to meet her pace. “Your guard…you and she could—”
“Deneya?” Ferro let out a deep laugh. “Deneya is not someone with whom I make conversation. She’s much too cold for that.”