by Toni Aleo
God, he had her in knots. She knew she would have to face him. Knew she would maybe even have to talk to him. Would she be as angry with him as she was with Skylar? She wasn’t sure, but one thing was for sure, she didn’t trust herself to see him. She yearned for him, wanted him, but at the same time, she was scared shitless of him and so upset that he’d broken her heart. It was all so complicated, so indecisive of her, and it was driving her mad.
She just wanted this week to be over. She wanted to go back to her life in Florida and ignore Tennessee all together. But even that was a lie and left her wondering what she even wanted.
Who she even was.
Maybe a week in a cabin, out in the wilderness of Tennessee, would do her some good. Clear her mind, find out who she was. Maybe even come back and forgive her sister. Or him. It could happen.
Or she could take Libby’s advice and cut them all.
“Honey, I’m home!”
Throwing the door of Jayden and Baylor Sinclair’s home closed behind him, Markus smirked. He was home. Well, his living situation was a little up in the air, but he was home in Tennessee, and that had him grinning like a fool. Even with it being a shit-ass morning, he was happy. He had to be. Though, the long meeting with the coaching staff of the Assassins really had him in knots. Markus realized very quickly they didn’t expect him to be there long. They offered him a hotel. Not housing, not an offer to stay with a teammate, but a hotel.
They didn’t want him. Elli wasn’t kidding, and because of that, he was fighting an uphill battle.
But what they didn’t know was he was ready to win.
When he didn’t hear anything in the large, contemporary-style home, he considered the fact that maybe he should have called. But he never called, he always just showed up.
Just then, Baylor looked around the corner, a grin on her face as she started for him. “You’re here! I thought you would go to Autumn’s first since Jace is there.”
Markus scoffed as they wrapped their arms around each other. The last time he had hugged his best friend, she was swollen and still recovering from the tough birth of her son. But now, only a couple months later, she was back to her normal shape and glowing with excitement. “And not see my best girl and my new godson? No way!”
She pulled back to look up at him, and his grin was unstoppable as she held his gaze with knowing eyes. “Or, you know there is no room at Mom’s house, so you came here?”
He nodded. “That too.”
Grinning, they embraced once more before letting go of each other just in time to see Jayden coming toward them with his new son. “Bro! Didn’t know you were coming so soon. Thought you were going to Mom’s,” he said, but then he paused. “There was no room for you there.”
Markus grinned. “This is true, but you guys act like I didn’t want to come here. I always come here.”
“But Jace is in town,” he added, coming up beside Baylor before she took their son. “He’s all changed.” Smiling brightly, she kissed the little baby’s head as Jayden looked back at Markus. “Figured you’d want to stay there with your best friend.”
“No room, for one.” He paused to take Dawson from his momma, cuddling the little baby against him. “Plus, I might need somewhere long term.”
Jayden’s brows pulled together as Baylor looked up from Dawson to him. “What? Why? Didn’t they find you housing?”
“You mean the hotel?” he asked, running his finger along Dawson’s nose. Cute little thing, but to him, he was just a baby. All babies looked the same. “Yeah, not gonna happen.”
“Hotel?” Baylor asked. “That doesn’t sound good.”
“Exactly,” he said simply, sitting down, and they followed suit. The living room was full of new pictures from their wedding that Jayden had thrown a couple months ago, along with pictures of their new family. Great pictures, lots of beautiful black-and-white shots of baby Dawson. So beautiful that he had to look away because he knew who’d taken them. He knew her work, her style. He had been stalking the studio she worked for over the last year.
They were Mekena’s.
“Great shots,” he said, nodding to the wall.
Baylor smiled as Jayden nodded. “Yeah, it’s the same girl who did Ashlyn’s pictures. Jace and Avery said I had no choice but to go with her. I flew her up here, she took them, and then I flew her back. She’s from here, actually.”
“He knows,” Baylor said slyly before giving Markus an uneasy smile.
Looking at his wife, confused, Jayden asked, “Huh?” And then it was like a lightbulb went off. “Ah, yeah, my bad.”
“Anyway,” Baylor demanded. “What in the world is going on? With the Assassins, I mean. They need you.”
Thankful for the subject change, though he’d much rather talk about baby poop, Markus shrugged. “At least someone thinks that because they already have one of my feet out the door. I just have to prove them wrong.”
“Yeah, they aren’t happy with your performance down in Florida. I had to fight for you, bro, so don’t fuck me over,” Jayden said sternly, and Markus nodded.
He already knew that.
“You know, I don’t understand. You don’t suck,” Baylor said, leaning into Jayden. “I don’t get it. You’re a great, smart player.”
“I’ve been struggling,” he admitted as Dawson yawned, his little face wrinkling up in a sweet way. Little babies were like old men in his opinion. Looking up, he met his friends’ gazes. “I’ve been sucking because I hate it there. I want to be where you guys are.”
Jayden rolled his eyes. “So you let that affect your game? Why did I go to bat for you?”
“Wow, thanks, dude,” Markus threw back, but even Baylor shook her head.
“He’s right, Markus. You’ve given up because you don’t have what you want? That’s what children do. You are an adult, wanting your place. Act like it.”
Letting his shoulders fall, he looked back down to Dawson. “I hear you guys. I fully own up to my sucking, but that’s going to change.”
But when he looked up again, Jayden didn’t seem to agree. “So because you’re getting your way, you’re going to fight for it? What will happen if you get traded? Or don’t get called up? You gonna give up? That’s insane, and I didn’t take you for that kind of person. That kind of player. I wouldn’t have fought for you if I had known.”
Taken aback by that, Markus’s face scrunched up. “Whoa, what the hell? Is it Attack Markus Day?”
“Dude, you just sat here and told me you have been sucking because you don’t like it there. Do you know how pathetic that sounds?”
“Yes, I do! But that doesn’t mean to throw it in my face.”
“Someone needs to. Someone needs to wake your ass up. Since we’re the closest thing you’ve got to family, to brothers, I’m gonna do it. Because you have to work for what you want. It can’t just be handed to you,” Jayden said, shaking his head, and Markus agreed completely. He had worked for everything he had, and Jayden knew that. They might not be as close as he and Baylor, but Jayden knew Markus’s story, knew how hard he worked and how much he wanted this. He was the brother Markus didn’t have but always wanted. Jayden was the one he looked up to. He was strong, smart, and he didn’t play around. This was classic Jayden.
“You know what, I don’t believe your excuse,” Baylor said then, shaking her head and bringing his attention to her. “My dad coached you too, just like us, and he didn’t coach some entitled asshole. He wouldn’t have fought for someone like that. He wouldn’t have written those recommendation letters if he had known this was who you were. This isn’t you. I know you. So what the hell is going on? Because I know you’re lying.”
Diverting his eyes to Dawson, Markus swallowed hard before running his tongue along his teeth. “I have no clue what you’re talking about. I hated it in Florida, and my performance reflected that.”
“Or,” Baylor said, her voice full of knowledge. “You’re still torn up about Mekena, and it’s fucking with your head. Either wa
y, you’re better than this. I know you are.”
“What? Really?” Jayden gasped, but Markus ignored him.
“No!” He laughed, shaking Dawson awake. “Ha. Please! I haven’t seen or heard from her in over a year. I don’t even think about her.”
Lie.
“Yeah, okay,” she laughed, and he really didn’t like Baylor Sinclair any longer. “You loved her, Markus. I know that, everyone knew that. And I get it, it hurts, but are you going to throw your career away because of it?”
“Baylor,” he said sternly. “I’m not throwing my career away. I got a little distracted, maybe derailed a bit, but I can get back to where I was. That’s not the problem. The problem is no one believes in me.”
Silence filled the room, the only sounds those of Dawson breathing softly. Markus felt like a failure, and he was. It was that simple. His parents didn’t care about him or his career. The girl he loved, he lost. He wasn’t with the people who cheered him on, and everyone was moving on but him. He was stuck.
They were both right. He was acting like an entitled little child, and that wasn’t who he was. He worked for everything he had, with no support or love from his parents—or anyone, for that matter. He graduated with decent grades and a degree in sports medicine because he wanted it. He didn’t have to do it, but he did because he wanted something to fall back on. He was a smart guy, so what in the world was he doing?
He knew the answer. It was there, flashing in his face.
He had gotten lazy.
It was time to go back to what he knew, and that was how to work for what he wanted. Before he could express that to the people he was closest to, he looked up to see Jayden watching him.
“That’s not a problem at all,” he said simply. “We believe in you. We love you and know you are one of the best players and people we know. If that weren’t the case, would we let you be the godfather of our child? The answer is no. I don’t know when you lost the confidence in yourself, but I need you to find it, bro. I need you to be the man, the person, I know and love. I can’t play with the person who is sitting across from me holding my son, a boy who one day will look up to you.”
Wow. Jayden wasn’t holding back.
“He’s right,” Baylor agreed, her eyes full of love, but also hardness. She was one of the toughest chicks he knew. “You know he is right.”
Swallowing hard, Markus looked back down to Dawson. The little guy was just looking back up at him, a tiny gleam in his sweet green eyes. No clue how hard it was to be an adult or the future of shit he would have to deal with. The heartbreak, the betrayal, and the unknown of life. Unfortunately, Markus knew exactly what had made him lose his confidence.
Or better yet, who.
“Jayden is absolutely right,” he said softly, looking up to them. “And I’m going to prove them wrong. I’m going to get into the NHL because I’m going to work my ass off. Nothing will hold me back. I will be the player you know I am. Don’t worry. I got this.”
“We know you do,” Baylor said, her lips curving.
Nodding his head, Jayden smiled. “You belong with us, Markus. We all know it, we all believe that. Do you?”
“I do.”
“Then prove yourself.”
“I will,” he said confidently, and for the first time in months, he believed the words. He believed in the person who was saying them. Nothing was going to stand in his way; he was going to get his dream. He wouldn’t think of that night. He wouldn’t think about how he woke up with a girl in his bed he had never intended to sleep with. And he definitely wouldn’t think about the pure betrayal in Mekena’s eyes when she came to see him the morning after, finding her sister with him. He couldn’t. He had a goal. He had an endgame, and he was going to get there.
Doing it the only way he knew how. Work: pure and simple.
No distractions.
No worrying about the past.
Only the future.
His future.
The NHL.
“And you’re more than welcome to stay here,” Baylor said then, and he looked up, meeting her gaze. “You’re always welcome here. But how about you get on the team and get your own place?”
“That’s the plan,” he said, a sigh of relief leaving his lips.
“But we’re heading to the cabins tomorrow. I’m pretty sure there’s a free one you can have. Let me text Lucy and make sure,” Jayden said, pulling his phone out. Only a second passed before he nodded. “Yeah, there is one available, and she says she can’t wait to see your punk ass.”
Markus grinned. “Cool, tell her, ‘back at ya.’”
A smile settled on Jayden’s lips as he typed away, leaving the room. Baylor watched as her husband left and then looked back to Markus. “Don’t take his candor to heart, you know how hard he is on everyone.”
Markus waved her off, careful not to drop Dawson. “He’s right, and we all know how serious he is about hockey and his word. I can’t let him down.”
“You’re right, but I also know that you’re better than this.”
“I know.”
“Then what’s going on?”
He shrugged, unsure what to say. The only person who knew the whole story about that night was Jace. Markus hadn’t gone into detail with Baylor. He only told her that he had cheated. While he knew her heart wasn’t as broken as Mekena’s, Baylor was sickened about it. Markus wasn’t a cheater; he was the commitment type. And for a long time, Baylor wouldn’t talk to him. She was so upset and disappointed in him. He couldn’t blame her, yet he couldn’t tell her the truth. He wasn’t even sure what he could say. That he had sex with someone he didn’t want to have sex with, and he didn’t even know how he did it? How he didn’t remember anything about the night? It was embarrassing, and he felt like a total piece of shit. He couldn’t tell her that. No, he’d stick by his story.
“I can’t let go of what I did to her. I feel like shit.”
“Then tell her that.”
“She deleted her Facebook, changed her phone number, and when I called the studio she’s working at in Florida, her aunt told me to fuck off.”
“She’ll be here all week.”
“And she’ll stay far away from me or behind Avery.”
Baylor nodded. “Maybe you can pull her aside?”
Baylor was a no-holds-barred kind of gal. She got what she wanted, when she wanted it, and did it fully with all her heart. She loved like that too. She was fiercely protective of Markus, as he was of her, but he couldn’t take the pity that was in her eyes. He knew she just wanted to fix the situation, to make things better for him, but as his mama always said, “You made your bed, now you have to lie in it.” He never should have been close enough to Mekena’s sister to allow it to happen. He should have run the other way. He knew her reputation, and he knew that she was jealous of Mekena because of how smart and classically beautiful she was.
He didn’t try hard enough, and because of that, he lost a girl he really cared for. If he saw her this weekend, he’d try. He’d talk to her, apologize for breaking her heart. He’d ask for her forgiveness, though, he doubted she’d ever give it to him. He didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve her. But maybe, just maybe, he’d get what he asked for. And if he did, maybe it would help.
Maybe he could finally move on.
Swallowing hard, he shrugged. “If I even get a chance, I will. Maybe I’ll use my main man Dawson as a distraction.” He smiled down at his godson, and the baby just gazed up at him as Baylor laughed.
“He is a damn good distraction,” she said proudly, and he grinned.
“Yeah, he is,” he agreed, planting a soft kiss to his head before looking back to his momma. Even with the fact that her child almost killed her during his birth, she was still smiling. Still glowing. She had so much to worry about. There was no reason to add his stresses and issues to that. “Don’t worry about me, Bay. I got this.”
She scoffed. “I have no doubts. I only hope you get what you want.”
> “I will,” he answered.
He just hoped he was right.
“I’m glad you made it.”
Markus looked behind him to see Mrs. Adler leaning against the boards, a grin on her face. Her nose was a little pink from the chill of the ice, but unlike other women he knew who bundled up to come into the rink, she still wore her office attire. A flowing flowery dress traced her curves, accompanied by, of course, her high purple heels. That was Elli Adler. She never looked underdressed or messy; she couldn’t. She was the face of the Assassins.
Grinning back at her through the visor of his helmet, he nodded. “Of course. Gotta make you proud.”
“Good. Why don’t you come here for a moment?” she said, the grin still there. He paused for a split second, his hand gripping his stick. She was smiling, so surely he wasn’t in any trouble. But it made him nervous. Plus, should he really get off the ice when they were about to start?
He hooked his thumb to the ice where everyone was warming up. “But we’re about to start, aren’t we?”
She laughed. “They’ll wait. I’m the owner,” she whispered, her eyes sparkling with playfulness. “Come on.”
He did as he was asked, following her through the bench area to the tunnel where another man stood, a packet of papers in his hands. “This is one of the team’s lawyers. He’s here because people messed up during your first meeting and didn’t have you sign a few sheets of paper.” She turned to Markus, handing him a clipboard with the papers she spoke of. “First one is legal stuff—how you’ll be paid while you are here and all that jazz. Second is what we offer while you are here. When you are playing more than two games a week, you’ll get another offer sheet.”
Markus nodded as he read the first page very quickly. “I already signed this one,” he said, looking up to her. His grandpa always said to make sure you read everything. Even if the lawyers went through it, read it. He was a quick reader since he read every free moment he had. With Jace being so far away and his not having friends in Florida, Markus gave up video games, and reading became life. He loved it. As a result, reading through the papers was a breeze.