by Toni Aleo
“I know, it’s just… I feel dumb ’cause I should have done it by now.”
“I mean, if you’re waiting for marriage, then it’s cool. It’s sweet.”
“No, it’s not that. I just haven’t trusted anyone to do it.”
Holding her close to him, he nodded, his cheek against her head. That made complete sense, and it also must be the reason why he felt she was holding back. She didn’t trust him yet. “I’m scared I’ll suck.”
He scoffed a bit at that. “You’d be great,” he whispered. He said it not because he wanted it, but because he wanted to ease her apprehension.
“I’m sorry.”
He shook his head, pulling back to look at her. “Don’t you apologize, Mekena. It’s fine, and I’m good. We will go at your pace. When you’re ready, you let me know. I’ll be first in line.”
Her little lips tipped slightly as her eyes met his. “Really?”
“Oh, yeah,” he said with a grin. “And Lord have mercy on my soul when that goes down ’cause I don’t think I’ll be able to handle it.”
Her nose wrinkled a bit as she giggled. “Thanks, Markus.”
“Of course,” he said, tilting her chin up and kissing her nose. “Your pace. On everything.”
“Everything?”
“Yeah,” he said, knowing she knew what he meant. “I know you’re holding out on being mine.”
She smiled. “Just a bit.”
He held her gaze. “Can I ask why?”
She slowly shrugged, looking away. “I don’t know. I’m scared.”
“Scared? Of me?”
She smiled. “Yeah, you’re almost too good to be true.”
He laughed. “I fart a lot, remember?”
She laughed too, her face breaking into such a carefree expression. Like he wanted. “You do, but you aren’t like all the other guys I meet. For as long as I can remember, my sister has always said that guys were dogs, out for one thing and one thing only. It gave me a complex, that what if I’m not good enough and then they leave? But you, you actually like sitting with me and reading or watching TV. You don’t press for it, you press for my attention, which is nice. Truth be told, I’m afraid you’ll get it and leave.”
Markus shook his head, understanding her but also thinking she was crazy. How could he leave when he had the gold mine? “Nope, not gonna happen.”
“I hope not.”
“Not hoping because, remember, I’m first in line. Waiting.”
“There is no line, only you,” she whispered, and his heart shattered right there. She thought he was too good to be true. Shit, he knew she was too good to be true. She was smart. Beautiful and so damn sweet. Dating was a fucking clusterfuck. No one wanted forever anymore. They wanted right now, and then it was on to the next. He didn’t want a Tinder kind of love; he wanted a Facebook-official one.
And Mekena was just that.
But that damn fate. She had it out for him, and within a couple days, he ruined it all.
But Mekena was still there. She could have gone anywhere, but she stayed. With him. In a cabin a good ten minutes away from the main cabins—that had to mean something. As much as he wanted to believe he had a chance, he couldn’t help but think he didn’t. Though, at least he could apologize. Take the loss and move on. But even knowing that, he had a bit of giddiness in his step as he headed behind the counter to start cooking the pancakes he had bought the ingredients for the night before. He had a thing for pancakes, especially banana ones, and he also knew that Mekena loved his banana pancakes.
As he got to work, he was quiet, making sure not to slam the pans or make much noise, not wanting to wake her. When he finished, he put some on a plate for her, planning to put them in the microwave and writing a note to tell her they were in there. As he stuffed his face, he checked his phone as nerves ate him alive. He was heading to the rink in a matter of minutes, and he felt good. But what if he fucked up? He couldn’t lose this chance. He had to make a good impression and kick some ass. He had to.
Laying his fork down along with his phone, he lifted his arms over his head just as something moved below him at the bar off the kitchen. Looking down, all he could see was a big bundle of fur, and with a cry of surprise, he found himself flat on his ass. He wasn’t sure how he lost his balance, but thank God no one saw him fall off the high barstool except for what he could tell was a very fat cat. But as he took in the cat, he swore it was laughing.
“Asshole.”
It hissed at him, and he scooted backward, rushing to his feet as it came out, meowing at him. He wasn’t sure what it wanted. Though, it did look as if it wanted to eat him. Or maybe it always looked like that?
Still, he found himself asking, “Are you hungry?”
It meowed, and Markus took that as a yes. Looking around for some cat food, he saw none, so he shrugged. “I don’t see anything, buddy.”
The cat looked at the plate on the counter that was for Mekena and then back to Markus before looking back to the plate. Markus wasn’t sure what was happening or what power the fat cat had, but soon he was reaching for Mekena’s plate and he threw the cat a pancake. It hit the floor with a plop.
“Wait, can you eat that?”
Before he could stop the cat, though, it was inhaling the pancake. “Guess so.”
His phone sounded, and he saw it was a text from Jace.
Jace: Don’t be late, punk. I saw Jayden running this morning.
Markus: Overachiever, and why didn’t he invite me?
Jace: Told him your face was busted.
Markus: Douche.
Jace: Love you too.
Jace: But for real, you good?
Markus: Nose is broken. I popped it back but it’s swollen as fuck. I’ll be okay.
Markus: She didn’t leave.
Jace: I know. She told Avery she didn’t want to leave the cat with her mom.
Markus looked down at the cat. “So you’re Mekena’s?”
It ignored him as he looked back to his phone.
Markus: Why not?
Jace: I don’t know, but Skylar is at her mom’s, so she won’t go.
Markus: Wait, they aren’t talking?
Jace: lol, dude, you slept with her. Of course, they aren’t talking.
Markus: Oh. That’s surprising. They were close.
Jace: Eh, Skylar’s a whore.
Markus: Truth, but she’s her sister.
Jace: Yeah, but Mekena’s pissed.
Markus: For good reason, but cool, maybe I can talk to her.
Jace: Be good for both of you.
Suddenly, his timer started going off, signaling it was time to go but also startling him. Turning it off quickly so it didn’t wake Mekena, he typed back a quick good-bye to Jace. The news that Skylar and Mekena weren’t talking did something to him that he didn’t understand. It was bad enough that Mekena’s heart was broken, but she didn’t have her sister either? It was all Skylar’s fault, but still, he felt bad about that. He wanted to wait for Mekena to get up, maybe talk to her, but he knew he couldn’t. He had to go. Looking down to the cat, who was finished with the pancake and obviously expecting another one, he shrugged. “Sorry, you’re on your own. See ya, kitty.”
Rushing out the door, he ran toward the main house and then to the left where he knew Jayden and Baylor’s cabin was. Jayden was outside, leaning against his truck as he sipped on a cup of coffee. When he looked over to Markus, Jayden’s brow rose.
“What happened to your face?”
“The same thing that will happen to yours if we’re late.”
That made Jayden laugh harder, though Markus wasn’t laughing. His nose still hurt and he was a bit embarrassed about it, but a smile started to form on his face. Not from the pain—he wasn’t that insane—but because of who did it.
The one he lost.
Rolling to her side, Mekena opened her eyes and automatically shielded them from the light coming in through the window. She should have shut the curtains, but she had
n’t had a chance once her head hit her pillow. She was out like a light. After her fight with Markus—if that’s what it was, she still wasn’t sure what to call it. A whole bunch of yelling and heat in their eyes for sure, but it didn’t feel like a fight. It felt like pain, if that even made sense. Then she had that conversation with Libby and one with Avery about basically the same things she’d talked to Libby about. Everyone was in agreement. She needed to talk to Markus, get some closure, but it all scared her. If they had the certainty it was over, they were truly done and that should be okay. That should be what she wanted, but she didn’t.
Which was downright pathetic, insane, and impractical.
Kicking the blankets off, she rolled out of bed with a heavy sigh. She didn’t know what was wrong with her, what pull Markus had on her, but it was driving her bonkers. She just wanted to be over it all. She didn’t want to dwell or even deal with it, but that was out of the question now. She was staying with Markus until something else opened up. Completely crazy.
Deciding that she needed to think about something else, she looked around for Mr. Right since he wasn’t in his usual spot beside her in the bed. When she noticed the door was open wider than she’d left it, she figured he had gone out to look at the birds from the front window. Heading to the bathroom, she did her morning routine before walking out to check on Mr. Right since he still wasn’t back. He usually sat at the door crying for food, but it was silent in the cabin.
As soon as she reached her bedroom door, though, she paused, reaching for her bathrobe to cover the short shorts and tank she wore. She wasn’t sure if Markus was there since he had said he had practice. But just in case, she didn’t want him to see her body, which she knew was ridiculous. She had lost a lot of weight in the last year. Almost thirty pounds, which was good from her doctor’s point of view, but she thought she looked too thin. She had always been on the thicker side, though not with muscle like Skylar was. She was chunky and embraced it. She loved food, and she wouldn’t deprive herself. Even with the weight loss, she hadn’t been starving herself. She had been so stressed with everything that happened, then the move, and then work that eating wasn’t really that important. She had never been skinnier than Skylar, and now she was. She was a little self-conscious about it.
Especially since she knew Markus had noticed.
She had seen the way he’d looked at her, not with the hunger he had before. He probably wasn’t even attracted to her. Though, why that mattered was beyond her. But there were moments when he looked as if he wanted to eat her for dinner. The way his molten eyes drank her in, the way his gaze washed over her like a hot shower. His tongue had come out, wetting his thick lips. And even with looking away and trying to ignore him, she’d noticed and it set her on fire. She wanted him more than she could ever describe and way more than she liked to.
She didn’t know what he was talking about when he had said she knew nothing, after she accused him of not caring—because she did know. It was pretty cut-and-dried. He fucked her sister, plain and simple. His defense, though, surprised her. The way he was so willing to share a room with her, how he looked at her, like…like he still had feelings for her. That was incomprehensible because if he had cared even an ounce for her, he wouldn’t have cheated. He wouldn’t have broken her heart. But because he did, the whole thing with Markus was one big question mark. One she was dying to figure out the answer to. The only problem was that involved her talking to him and giving him a chance to explain, which was something she wasn’t sure she was ready for.
But she had four days to get ready because they were stuck until Friday.
Rolling her eyes at the insanity of it all, she let out a long breath. She hadn’t seen the guy in over a year, did everything to ignore him, and now she was stuck in a cabin with him. A good ten minutes from anyone else. She was an idiot. That’s all there was to it.
Tightening the strap on her robe, she went out the door to find that no one was there except Mr. Right, who was sitting on the counter, cleaning his face in front of a dirty, empty plate. Great, not only was Markus a cheater, but he was also a slob. She would not clean up after him. There was no way…yet she found herself cleaning the plate and putting it away as she looked to Mr. Right, who was sitting very happily, meowing sweet nothings to her.
“Well, good morning to you, my sweet love bug. Aren’t you in a good mood? Did you have a nice sleep?”
He purred happily as she dried the plate and then put it in the rack. She considered making herself some breakfast but then remembered she was meeting the girls for breakfast, so she switched on the coffeepot just as a piece of paper caught her eye. Reaching for it, she recognized Markus’s handwriting before she read it. Her heart kicked up in speed at his messy scrawl as she read it.
Mekena,
Hey, I had practice, and you know how I love me some banana pancakes. I know you love them too, so I thought maybe you’d like some. Enjoy.
Love,
Markus
Love.
Love, Markus.
Markus, love.
Love.
Ugh, she was in complete trouble if only those two words made her heart do flip-flops.
Damn it.
But where were the pancakes? Her brows pulled together since she saw no pancakes. Looking in the microwave, she found nothing, and that disappointed her. She loved his pancakes; they were the best she had ever had. He used to make them every Sunday for the boys at the Bullies house back on campus, and she always came to eat. She wondered where they… And then it all clicked.
The empty plate, the very happy fat cat.
Glaring at her kitty, she scolded, “Mister! You ate that whole plate!”
Mr. Right only purred before jumping, if that was what you could call what he did to get down, off the counter and waddling to the bedroom. “You are pathetic,” she yelled as he disappeared into the bedroom before her bottom lip puckered out. “And an asshole. I wanted pancakes.”
Leaning on the counter, she was annoyed by not having any pancakes. But she was also a little giddy, her lips curving a bit. She wasn’t sure what Markus was doing, or even his endgame, but he’d made her pancakes. Something he didn’t have to do, but he did.
For her.
Because he remembered she loved his pancakes.
Even after two years…
And that pleased her more than it should.
God, she was an idiot.
“So, I’m thinking karaoke tomorrow night since we are having dinner with Mom and River tonight. I think my dad is coming in too.”
Mekena looked up from the spa book she was studying to where Lucy was sitting with her glass of wine. How she got invited to spa day with Lucy and the girls was beyond her, but it was a welcome escape. Her back was in need of a good massage and her toes were busted, so they needed some love. Plus, she got to spend the day with Avery.
“Is he coming?” Baylor asked, wiping up Dawson’s mouth as her face scrunched up. It was common knowledge that no one really cared for Mark Sinclair, Lucy’s father. He had cheated on Mrs. Sinclair and then tried to buy off his kids. It was shitty, but word had it he was trying and being really decent to everyone. The Sinclairs were about family, first and foremost, so Mekena guessed they had buried the hatchet and were trying. Something she should consider with Skylar, but maybe she was petty because she couldn’t do it. “For real?”
“Apparently. We’ll see.”
“Cool,” she said with a grin as she cuddled Dawson in her arms. “Jayden was supposed to come get Dawson before they hit the greens. I wonder where he is.”
“Jude just said they’re running late, but they’ll swing by in five,” Claire said, setting her phone in her lap. “He also said there is talk of trading him to Minnesota, which is fucking awesome. Or not.”
“Oh, Claire, I’m sorry,” Avery said, and Mekena’s heart went out to her.
On the verge of tears, Claire shook her head. “It’s already hard enough, me living in Vegas a
nd him in LA. Now he’ll be farther. And that’s not a car ride, it’s a plane ride. Ugh. I just want out of this contract. I’m done, you know? I want to start a family. I want to be home with my husband.”
Everyone nodded in agreement, and Lucy reached over, squeezing Claire’s wrist. “It will work out. Don’t worry. And if he does get traded, it will still work out. No worries. You guys are good.”
She bit her lip as she nodded. “He really wants a baby.”
Lucy smiled. “And y’all will have one. Don’t worry. Still got a lot of baby-making years in ya.”
That made everyone chuckle. The side door opened, and Markus suddenly entered. He looked gorgeous, almost like a model in some ankle-length trousers and a light blue button-up shirt that made his skin shine. He had gotten a haircut and his face was beautiful, but his poor nose. It was a wreck, so swollen, but she didn’t think anyone noticed with the big grin on his face. Holding her breath, she looked over at Avery, who was watching her. What was he doing here?
“Hello, ladies,” he said, flashing his lady-killing smile. “Sorry to interrupt, but I gotta get my main man and go riding in a golf cart.”
Without saying more, he reached for Dawson, taking him from Baylor. “Where is Jayden?” she asked as she looked to Markus.
“He’s getting his clubs or something… I don’t know. I hate golf, so Dawson and I are gonna ride and talk shit the whole time.” Baylor rolled her eyes as she handed him the baby’s bag. “Wait, isn’t there like a baby carrier, sling thingy? Jayden said I could wear him.”
He looked so excited that Mekena had to fight back her smile. Baylor, though, laughed, standing up and opening the bag to pull out the baby carrier. Lucy took Dawson, and Mekena watched as Baylor strapped Markus up. They weren’t awkward around each other, laughing and joking as she strapped the baby thing to him hard and with force. They had been best friends for a long while. For the longest time, Mekena was convinced they were together, but they were really more like brother and sister. It was sweet, but nothing was as sweet as seeing Dawson sit against Markus’s chest as he smiled proudly.