by Toni Aleo
She never wanted to lose it again.
She didn’t want to lose him.
Pulling back, she looked up at him and smiled as he asked, “So tell me something?”
“Yeah?”
“Why did you move to Florida? I thought you loved it here.”
She shook her head as she moved out of his arms, leaning against the counter with him. “I needed a new start.”
“I knew you didn’t want to be a doctor.”
She smiled. “You had called me on that before.”
“I had. Your passion wasn’t for saving people, it was for preserving moments on film.”
Her heart fluttered as she nodded. He used to lie in the quad with her and watch as she would take random pictures of people on campus. Pictures of leaves, squirrels, and birds. Anything that moved, she took a picture of. She loved it; it was her passion, and he always knew that. “You’re right.”
“I know,” he said with a wink, but then his face turned a little serious. “I thought you moved because of everything that happened.”
She nodded. “I did.”
“Of course you did,” he said sadly, looking up and exhaling hard.
“Yeah, I had to run. I had to get off that campus. I swore I would see y’all together.”
He scoffed. “No way. I never wanted Skylar. Never. She went through the whole Bullies’ house, and even if she hadn’t, I wasn’t attracted to her. I was attracted to you.”
Their eyes met, and she smiled as she nodded. “I know, but it scared me because she made me believe that you wanted her.” Her voice broke a bit as she looked away. “I felt like if I stayed, I wouldn’t get over you. Over what happened.”
“Yeah.” Looking over at her, he asked, “Did it work?”
“Not at all,” she answered and he smiled. “Obviously, since I just jumped you like a cat in heat.”
He laughed at that, nodding his head. “Yeah, I never expected that. And really, how in the world were you still a virgin? It’s been almost two years.”
She shrugged, looking down, a little embarrassed. “I don’t know. I’ve been busy with work, and I really didn’t know anyone in Florida, and then I didn’t meet anyone. It just didn’t matter, you know?”
He didn’t seem to understand as he held her gaze. “Well, I wasn’t a virgin.”
“I know,” she scoffed.
“And I slept with people while we’ve been apart,” he admitted cautiously.
“I’m sure you did,” she said, though it did sting a bit that he had been able to move on. But she appreciated his honesty. He was laying his cards out, and she wanted to do the same.
“In no way had I moved on, though.”
“Oh,” she murmured, pressing her lips together and fighting back her grin.
“At first, I did it to see if I would remember. I mean, I would be drunk and I would go home and I would remember everything that happened that night, like I’d always been able to before. That’s why I started to believe she had drugged me. Then I was just fucking women to forget. To forget what happened completely. And I did for a little while. I compartmentalized what had happened with Skylar, and I chalked it up as a loss. But I learned very quickly I couldn’t forget you,” he admitted, his eyes burning into hers. “I know this isn’t easy to hear.”
“It isn’t.”
“I’m sorry, I just want to be honest. I don’t want anything to come up either and have you feel betrayed. I want you to know, and also know that I was just lost without you.”
Swallowing hard, she nodded. “I appreciate that, and I couldn’t forget you either. I think, in a way, my virginity was yours.” She paused, looking away as her eyes started to cloud. “I was so mad at you, hurt and broken, but I wanted you back. I never got over you, and I missed you something insane.”
“I missed you too, a lot,” he admitted, and her face hurt, she was smiling so hard. “So, do you like Florida?”
“Not at all.” Shaking her head, she shrugged. “I love Nashville. I love all four seasons, and this place is my home. I haven’t been back for any real length of time since I left, and being here made me realize how much I miss it.”
“Yeah, I’ve missed it too. I don’t like it down in Florida either.”
“Really? I thought you would.”
“No, I want to play for the Assassins, the team I grew up dreaming of playing for. I want to live here and have a house and make a life. If I were to get traded down the road, that would be fine, I guess. But first, I want to play for my dream team.”
“You’re doing that, Markus. All I hear when I’m around the team is how much you’ve impressed. You’re living your dreams.”
“Finally,” he laughed, shaking his head. “I hadn’t realized how fucked up I was from everything that happened until I saw you.”
“Me?”
“Yeah,” he said, looking down. “Seeing you made me realize why I hated my life so much. It wasn’t because I was playing for the Ninjas or living in Florida, it was because I hadn’t accepted that someone hurt me. That someone broke my heart and took away my happiness. I remember, at first, all I wanted was to apologize to you, get closure, and let you move on. I wanted you to be happy with someone who deserved you. I knew a good man would never fuck up the way I had. But the more I saw you, the more I looked into your eyes, the more I re-memorized everything about you, I wanted to be the good man who deserved you. And that’s when I knew I had to get closure from her, so I could be honest with you and tell you everything. And then maybe, just maybe, I could try to be happy again. With you.”
Reaching out, he laced his fingers with hers as his thumb moved along the back of her hand. His eyes searched hers as her heart pounded in her chest, and all she could do was draw in big breaths as she fought back the tears. She had wanted to hear those words from his mouth for so long. So much so that she almost asked him to say them again, just so she could keep them forever. He was a good man; she knew that. Hell, everyone knew that. But they were two good people who were put in a shitty situation because of someone who was hell-bent on having company in her misery-filled life.
Mekena would not be a part of that.
“I called Avery before I jumped in the shower,” she said, looking up at him, and he grinned.
“Of course you did. Can she stop hating me now?”
Mekena laughed as she nodded. “Yeah, but that’s not my point. I told her I slept with you, because she’s my best friend, and she asked me if this was it. If we never went any further, would I be okay with it? Would I be okay with losing my virginity to you? I said yes, but the thing is, Markus, I don’t want this to be it. I don’t want to walk away with this being our last hurrah or whatever you wanna call it. I don’t know what you want from this, but—”
Before she could finish, his mouth was on hers, his arms tightening around her as he held her close to him, their bodies molding together. Melting into his arms, she held on to him as he kissed her, his mouth, his tongue moving sensually with hers. There was a time when she’d lived for his kisses, when they were what she looked forward to. And what a thing to look forward to. As his hand came up her back, threading through her hair, she squeezed her eyes shut, knowing she would never love anyone the way she loved him.
Pulling back, way too soon, he held his mouth a breath away as he whispered, “My intentions are pretty straightforward.”
“They are?”
He nodded, his lips curving ever so slightly. “I want all of it. All of you. I have no clue how, and I sure as hell don’t know what the future holds, but I want to figure it out, Mekena. With you. Only you.”
Swallowing hard, she nodded her head, her nose moving against his as his beautiful caramel eyes bored into hers. As her hands came up, cupping his face, she loved the contrast of his dark skin against her pale. The way his face fit perfectly in her hands, how his eyes fell shut a tiny bit as she moved her thumbs along his thick bottom lip. Chills ran up her spine as he held her gaze, his eyes con
taining so much love and admiration for only her. He hadn’t said the words to her, but she knew he loved her. He always had, as she did him. She almost said the words—almost—but then she didn’t want to put it all out there for her assumptions to be completely wrong.
Call her a coward, but she wanted him to say it first. Because of her chicken ass, she leaned her nose into his, her fingers biting into his skin as she nodded.
“I want the same thing.”
“Good,” he said as an exhale, and she grinned as their gazes stayed locked. “Mekena.”
“Markus?” she asked, but then she was overtaken by one hell of a yawn. Her eyes closed and her mouth opened as she yawned loudly, before she crumpled in laughter. “Oh my goodness, I’m sorry. I’m worn out.”
He smiled, cuddling her tighter to his chest. “Let’s go to bed.”
She eyed him, fighting back another yawn. “Together?”
“Together.”
Moving as one, they shut off the lights and headed into Mekena’s room. She was on cloud nine, in pure bliss, but she still worried what the future held. But that fear went away as she pulled back the covers and looked around the room as he entered the bed. She was wearing a big tee, and she wasn’t sure if she should take it off. Did he want to have sex again? Should she offer? Would taking off her shirt be offering? Did she want to have sex again? In a way, yes. But she couldn’t help thinking about how sore she was. Also, she wasn’t sure if she could even handle him inside of her. It all seemed like an awesome idea in theory. Have sex all night, be wild and crazy, but he was hung like a horse and she was aching!
She didn’t know what to do.
As she reached for the bottom of her shirt, still unsure what to do, she was met with his laughter. His eyes were playful. “Babe, we can just go to bed.”
“So you don’t want sex?”
“Oh, I do, but I don’t want you hurting tomorrow.”
“True,” she said with a nod, getting into bed and pulling the covers up. “So tomorrow, I’m all about rounds two and three.”
He groaned. “You’re so mean.”
“What?” she asked, her eyes widening. What had she done?
“Now I have to go all day tomorrow, through all the pre-wedding crap, with one thing on my mind and probably a semi. I’ll have a hard-on for you, Mekena, all day, while you just flutter around taking pictures.”
She laughed. “Well, I’m wet just thinking about what we’ll do tomorrow. Does that help?”
His face went dark. “No, you jerk! Now I’m gonna have a full boner. All day! And night.”
Her laughter shook the bed as she lay on her side, meeting his gaze. “I’m not sorry.”
“I know you’re not.”
She grinned as he pulled the covers to his chest. Reaching out, he held her face, his thumb moving along her bottom lip as they stared into each other’s eyes. His words from earlier hung between them, and she couldn’t agree more. There was no way either of them could plan the future, but damn it, she wanted to try. She just prayed the stars would align and everything would work out.
Inhaling deeply, she said, “I have a meeting with Elli Adler on Monday for a job with the Assassins.”
His eyes widened a bit. “Really?”
“Yeah. So here is the plan.” His lips curved as she grinned over at him. “I get the job, you get a spot on the team, and boom, we’re good.”
He held his fist out, and she bumped it. “Solid plan. I’m down.”
So was she.
One hundred percent.
Markus woke because his phone went off.
He should have reached over and checked it, but once his eyes were open and on Mekena, nothing else mattered. She looked so beautiful, like an angel sleeping on a cloud of happiness. Her mouth was turned at the side, a little drool dripping from her lips as her eyelashes brushed her cheeks. Reaching out, he ran his hand along her chin just to make sure she was real. That this was real. Them, in the bed.
Like he had hoped, she was nice and warm, breathing sweetly as he drank her in. His breath caught as he wondered what would happen in the next couple days. In a way, he felt like he had whiplash. One second, he’d thought he’d never have a chance even to speak to her. Then he thought he only wanted closure for her sake, and he thought he would never have her. Within a day, all that changed, and now, he was staring into the face of his forever. God, he wanted her. For the rest of his God-given life. But could it even work out?
Would he get added to the roster for the Assassins? Would she get the job with the team? Could they make it work? It almost seemed way too good to be true. As if it couldn’t all happen. But what if it was fate? What if their fate was to be together? She wanted to be home, and he wanted to be home too. Couldn’t it just work out, and they’d be home—together? Happy? After all this time in hell, after all the shit Skylar had put them through, could they have this?
Or was that too much to ask for?
But if Nashville didn’t work out for both of them, could they do long distance? It was hard on Claire and Jude, he knew that, saw it firsthand, but they made it work because they loved each other. He loved Mekena, so damn much, and he didn’t care how the hell they made it work as long as they did. They had to. There was no other option—at least, not one he could accept. He wanted to be with her; he just hoped she felt the same. He thought she did, and he hoped he wasn’t just assuming things.
But deep inside, he felt like he wasn’t.
But she was still so young. There were four years between them. It hadn’t felt like much back in college, but what if he was in a different place than she was? He was looking for forever while she was just looking to fool around, date a bit? But even as he thought it, it seemed silly to him. Mekena had always been more mature than him. She was smart, she knew what she wanted, and he was starting to think he was overthinking this. Maybe he should just enjoy what they had, figure things out together, and fight for them.
He cupped her jaw before touching his lips to hers. He went to pull back, but her arms came around him, and soon her mouth was moving with his. Edging closer, he pressed himself into her, running his hands down her back and grabbing her ass as he deepened the kiss, unable to get enough of her succulent mouth. Her eyes fluttered open as a lazy smile spread over her sweet lips.
“Well, good morning.”
He grinned. “Hey there.”
As she leaned back into the pillow, her grin was unstoppable. “I almost thought last night was a dream. This is a great reminder that it wasn’t.”
“I couldn’t agree more,” he said, squeezing her ass. “How do you feel?”
She shrugged. “I guess, like I had sex for the first time.”
“Still sore?”
She grinned. “It doesn’t feel normal. Not sore, but definitely not normal.” He nodded, pressing himself against her before her breath caught. “Well, good morning again.”
He laughed, leaning his head into hers. “I don’t want to leave this bed.”
“I don’t either,” she whispered, her lips moving against his cheek. “And why are we awake? It’s only seven.” His brows pulled together as he angled back, looking at her. “I thought you set the alarm for nine.”
“I did,” he said, confused. Why was he awake?
Oh! His phone.
“My phone went off,” he said, letting her go. But as he moved, he felt someone staring at him. He looked at the end of the bed to find Mr. Right sitting there, staring at him. “Mekena.”
Her hand came to the middle of his back as she said, “Huh?”
He nodded his head to the cat. “Is he going to lunge and kill me?”
Sitting up on her elbows, she laughed and her head fell back. “No. He’s hungry.”
He made a face, looking back at her. “He’s always hungry.”
“Welcome to my life.”
“He needs to go on a diet.”
“Again, welcome to my life.”
He laughed. “Can you not
tell him no?”
Her face filled with distress. “It’s hard.”
“Is that why you slept with me? You couldn’t tell me no?” he teased, and she rewarded him with a deadpan expression.
“I attacked you, remember? I got naked? Shit, was I not that memorable?”
His head fell back as he laughed. “Oh, that’s right.” Leaning over, he pressed his lips to hers. “And baby, everything about you is memorable.”
She pushed him away as he laughed again before reaching for his phone to find there was a notification from the Assassins’ NHL application. “Oh, it’s the team app.”
“Team app?”
“The NHL app.”
“Oh,” she said, and he almost ignored it, but then he slid it open and his jaw dropped as he read what it said.
JUST IN! Markus Reeves, Bellevue University graduate and star defensemen for the Ninjas, will play in Wednesday’s game.
“Holy shit.”
“What?” she asked, sitting up to look over his shoulder. “Markus!”
“Holy shit.”
He hadn’t even been notified. Jayden had said something, but it wasn’t set in stone. Coach Baxter hadn’t said anything, and neither had Elli. Yeah, he was doing awesome and killing it, but he didn’t think this would happen. He really didn’t think he’d make it!
“Markus!” she yelled, shaking him, which made Mr. Right fall off the bed and hide, but Markus couldn’t pay him any mind. He kept reading the alert. “I’m so proud of you. You did it!”
Tears started to cloud his eyes as he sucked in a deep breath, reading it once more. “Holy shit.”
Shaking him once more, she wrapped her arms around him, falling into his lap as she pressed her lips to his. “Babe! You did it!”