by Jeannie Moon
Sure, coming home, being with his family had been great, but there was something magical about her, something so centered it was seeping into him. Even as she faced huge changes in her own life, she found a way to focus on others. He wondered who worried about her. Dan was an intense individual. He didn’t do calm, but for the first time since he’d left home all those years ago, he wasn’t on edge.
It was nice. He could definitely get used to it. He could get used to her.
The woman was all heart and Dan wanted a piece of it for himself. It had only taken him thirty years to work up the nerve to be worthy of her.
He was brought out of his own thoughts by a small knock.
“Uncle Danny? Are you busy?” The little voice outside belonged to his niece, Jamie. Only eight years old, she acted like a toughie, but the kid had a heart of gold.
“Come on in, Jamie Girl.” He watched as she poked her head in the door like she didn’t know what she was going to see. “Hey!” he said. “Long time no see.”
Not exactly true, since he’d seen her at breakfast, but she didn’t react to his joke, letting him know there was something on her mind.
“Have you been at the bookstore all day?” she asked.
“I have. I’ve been working there. They have that big round table and a comfortable chair. And coffee and cookies. It’s a nice space to write.”
“Better than the cottage?” She wasn’t looking at him, and there was a tiny bit of fear in her voice.
“It’s different. Not better or worse. Sometimes a writer has to stay with what’s working.” He patted the sofa cushion next to him, encouraging her to sit down. “Sweetie, what’s this all about?”
After a second she seemed to screw up her courage. “We want to know if you’re going to leave when you finish your book.”
“We?”
“Me and Ella and Gavin.”
At least they were talking again. When he heard about last night’s row, he had his doubts. Not sure what he should say, he thought about her question. If she had asked him that a week ago, he probably would have said yes, because initially, he’d come home to change his mindset, to feel the vibe of the small town, and the East Coast. He still had a house in Hawaii and he did love it there, but his time back here had started to shift his perspective. His house was in a secluded area, and unlike New York or California, he didn’t have a lot of friends living in the islands. If he spent an hour walking in Manhattan, he’d probably meet at least three people whom he knew. But even in the middle of the city, he could disappear if he wanted to.
In Angel Harbor it was different. For the first time he wanted the connection it provided, and that meant his answer to Jamie wasn’t such a clear thing.
“You know, I think I might stick around for a while. As long as Mom and Dad don’t boot me out.”
Jamie rolled her eyes. There was the attitude. Her mood must be passing.
“I don’t think that’s a problem.” She grinned. “Are you going to eat with us tonight?”
He hadn’t been in for a meal since he started on his writing tear earlier in the week. Watching Jamie’s eyes bloom hopefully, he had no intention of saying no. “What’s for dinner?”
“Homemade pizza. You can help if you want.”
Standing, Dan reached out his hand and Jamie took it, her smile broad and happy. The feel of her small hand in his made him think about what he’d missed not having kids of his own.
It might be too late to be a dad, but he could be a better uncle, a better brother and brother-in-law. He could have been a better son, and paid more attention to his parents when they were still alive.
Dan always thought regret was a pointless emotion, but he was learning it had a purpose. It could serve as a catalyst for change, and he was all for that.
Chapter Eight
Jane looked at the blanket pattern for her next step and dug through her yarn bag for the right shade of blue. She’d just found out one of the young moms who came into the store regularly with her twin girls, was having another baby. She was due in only a few months and was both thrilled and overwhelmed. She and her husband had given up hope of having another baby, but after years of trying, Caitlyn was finally pregnant.
A baby was such a joy. Jane decided that since the new little bundle—a boy—would probably be one of her favorite customers, she could make him a baby blanket to welcome him to the world. She would add a couple of favorite children’s books to the gift, because what kind of book pusher would she be if she didn’t?
Caitlyn was the type of customer Jane loved best. She didn’t spend a lot of money, but she was there often, using the store as a respite, a place to bring her girls when she needed a break in the routine. It was less structured than the library, and Jane was happy to offer the young mother, who had no family in the area, some friendship.
She wasn’t the only one, either. There was a group of retired teachers who came twice a month to have coffee and catch up. She’d had her book clubs, and the writers’ group that utilized the meeting room every month. There were so many people who had become friends, and she valued those connections more than she ever thought she would.
Nights like this were exactly what she needed when her brain was filled with too much stuff. Turning her attention back to her work, Jane transitioned to the new color. It was tricky, but Jane loved the calm, repetitive hand motion crocheting provided her. It was perfect for a quiet night at the store, and tonight was certainly that.
She’d had one customer come in for a book they’d put on order, but other than that the place was dead. She was sorry her part-timer was sick, but she wouldn’t have had anything to do if she had come in.
That gave Jane some cherished time to think. No people, just her, some soft music, tea and her yarn.
She was trying to focus on the good things coming up. Thanksgiving was less than a week away, Tara would be hearing from her early decision school very soon, and her mother would be home from her trip. Then Christmas would go into overdrive, and she wouldn’t have time to think about anything until after New Year’s Day.
Shaking off the negative thread that wound through her brain, Jane focused on her stitches. Her fingers worked, pulling the soft gray-blue yarn through a series of twists and loops. It was predictable, and the pretty Celtic weave was coming out better than she expected.
The bell over the door jingled, pulling Jane out of her work. As soon as she looked up, she saw Danny coming toward her. Her heart, the dirty traitor, skipped a beat as his smile bloomed. Lord, that smile was everything.
“Are you by yourself?” he asked, looking toward the back room. “Where’s Chloe?”
How could she not be affected by a man who loved her dog? “I am. Tracy took Chloe home around dinnertime, and my clerk didn’t come in tonight. She’s sick. It’s probably just as well. Not that she’s sick, but it’s been pretty quiet, especially for a Friday night. I might actually close early.”
“Yeah?” He unzipped his jacket. “Do you do that often?”
“Close early? Rarely, but I’m tired and town is dead except for the theater.” Noticing his bag, she backtracked. “I can stay, though, if you want to work.”
“Not necessary.” He leaned over and looked at what she was doing, grazing his fingers over the blanket. “This is nice. Soft.”
“Thank you. It’s for a…for a friend. She’s having a baby boy.”
Danny tucked his thumb under the strap on his shoulder, giving it a tug into place. “Look,” he said, “I should tell you, um, I didn’t come in to work.”
“No?” A little shudder raced through her. Jane knew what she wanted him to say, but she didn’t dare hope. “Then why are you here?”
There was a moment’s hesitation, just a second before he spoke. His eyes sparked, giving her a look at the depth of what he was feeling and this time, instead of his hand brushing the soft yarn of the blanket she was making, it landed on hers.
Warmth tickled through her, fluid and c
omforting. With just that single, intimate touch, Jane was lost.
“I came to see you.”
“Ohhh.” Her breath caught in her chest, while her heart patted rapidly along. “I…um…you did?”
“Yes.” He looked away, and then back. “I feel like a kid. I mean, I thought you would be busy, and I was going to pretend to write. Is that stupid? I sound like a stalker.”
Jane shook her head. How many times when she was a smitten teen had she stayed late with her dad just to be close to Danny? Should she tell him? “You’re not a stalker,” was all she could muster.
“I like being around you. You…” With a pained look he glanced up at the ceiling, then back at her. “This is going to sound strange, because I don’t exactly understand it, but you settle me.”
“I don’t think it’s strange. We gravitate to those who have something we need. Maybe—”
He cut her off, jumping on what she said. “Maybe you’re what I need, Jane.”
His words burned through her, allowing a long-protected part of her heart to crack open a little bit. In that tiny space, hope bloomed, and Jane thought maybe second chances weren’t just for everyone else. His hand still covered hers, and Jane, feeling brave for the first time in ages, turned hers over, allowing her fingers to tangle with his. Danny stared at their joined hands, his thumb moving back and forth over her knuckles.
There was a bond between them that went beyond the old feelings and crushes. These emotions were mature, deep. They were the kind of emotions that could change lives forever. Feeling the heat rise in her face, Jane was determined not to miss another chance.
“You know what? I do think I’m going to close the store. Would you like to, I don’t know, hang out?” She laughed at herself. “Is that the correct terminology?”
With a grin, he nodded. “I’d love to hang out with you.”
“Okay. Let me start wrapping things up.”
With a sense of purpose, Danny took off his jacket. “How can I help?”
*
Once she locked the front door and set the alarm, Danny realized they were going on their second date, and without meaning to, she had asked him. This day was getting better and better.
“So,” she said, turning to him, “what do you want to do?”
“I don’t know.” He really didn’t care. Just having the opportunity to spend time with her was enough. “I saw the bakery was open—do you want to go there?”
Jane tilted her head and thought for a second. “Oooh. Good idea. I love Viti’s chocolate mousse, and she makes an amazing apple tart.”
“You won’t get any argument from me.”
“No? How’s your blood sugar?” It was a joke, but not.
“I’m fine. It’s why I run every day. Keeps all those numbers in check.”
“I do my thirty on the elliptical. It’s not as hardcore as the running, but it gets the job done. I’m careful because of what happened with my father.”
“The maintenance is getting harder, isn’t it?” He was only half joking. Jane’s statement about her father was a good reality check.
“Yeah, but it’s not bad. I’m actually in pretty good shape.” Jane smiled and raised her arm in a mock flexing of her biceps.
He wanted to tell her she was in great shape. From where he was standing, she was pretty perfect. Jane had been rail thin when she was a teen. He’d seen her eat, that wasn’t the problem, but she seemed to have the metabolism of a jackrabbit on speed. It got her teased pretty badly in junior high school, especially when combined with her braces and big glasses. No one could see past the big brain to the even bigger heart. But he did. He always knew what was inside. What made her special.
By the time she hit senior year, Jane had finally started to grow into herself. There was more confidence, a sense of adventure, but overcoming that shyness would be her challenge. When she left for college in DC, the braces were long gone, and she’d lost the glasses for contacts. She was pretty, smart, and ambitious. And she had big dreams.
Danny remembered visiting her once when he and a couple of his frat brothers stopped in DC on their way south for spring break. They waited for her in the student commons, a big open space in one of the newer buildings on the campus, which was a stone’s throw from the National Mall.
He and his friends were picking through some fast food, when he heard her. That voice, clear and sweet, traveled over the din of the crowd around him and evoked a hundred memories.
“Danny!” she’d called.
When he looked up from his soggy fries, and saw her coming toward him, Danny’s heart stopped in his chest. No longer skinny, but long and lean, Jane looked like she should be walking down a runway in a gown, not wearing a sweatshirt with a picture of the Rosetta Stone screened on the front. Her hair fell in soft waves to her shoulders, and when her smile bloomed and her dimples popped, the world pretty much stopped.
His friends had lost all powers of speech as she stood there chattering endlessly in that way she had. Charming. Adorable. Happy.
They hadn’t seen each other in months, and sitting there Dan realized two things. The first was that he had missed her. He missed her so much the ache from it came roaring from the shadows. The second was that he couldn’t do anything about how he felt. They were both too focused on school and the future to get wrapped up in a long-distance relationship. It was best for him to keep quiet and suffer in silence.
And he did. Mostly. They stayed safely in the friend zone until they graduated college and spent the following summer inseparable. Those months changed everything, and he wasn’t man enough to admit it.
Janie was brave, though. She’d told him how she felt, but that didn’t stop him from making the biggest mistake of his life.
Dan rationalized that Jane’s work couldn’t be fixed in one place. Back then, being on the move was the only way she would thrive. She wanted to make a difference in the world. And while she wasn’t making all those great discoveries she’d dreamed of, by running a bookstore she put positive energy into the universe every single day.
Without any conversation, they left the confines of the porch and turned right onto the brick sidewalk that wound through town. Each passing day brought more holiday spirit to the streets. Wreaths and garlands adorned the outsides of stores, and twinkling lights made all of Main Street sparkle like it was dipped in crystals and jewels.
“It’s not as cold tonight as it’s been. I’m a little surprised.”
Jane shrugged. “It’s so unpredictable lately. I want it to get cold and stay cold for the season. This up and down stuff messes with my head.”
“I get it.”
“Are you having a hard time adjusting to the northeast after spending a year in Hawaii?”
“It’s getting better, but I’m with you. Cold isn’t a bad thing. It allows the environment to reset. I like the seasons.”
He’d thought that all through November and December last year while he was skimming shells on his beach in Hawaii. Tiki huts decorated with garland and tinsel, barbeques and a surfing Santa just didn’t feel right to him. Dan had turned his back on his life because he no longer wanted to inhabit the world of psychopaths and murderers. Unfortunately, he’d created another type of prison; this one just had a beach.
It had taken a long time for him to pull himself out of the pit he’d fallen into. But the climb out started on the day he opened his computer and put in a simple search. “Angel Harbor.”
He hadn’t been home in years. When his mom died, he flew his family to her favorite beach in Florida so they could reminisce and say their goodbyes. It was appropriate, and odd, and it kept him from setting foot in the town. He was sure with enough therapy someone could tell him why he’d avoided coming home. Guilt was probably one part of it. Fear was another, but after a full year of being alone 99 percent of the time, he’d had enough.
The search yielded an excess of results. He saw the renovated waterfront. A list of restaurants that would make any
foodie happy. There were quirky new businesses as well as the ones that had been there for years. And finally, in one picture he saw Jane, standing on the front porch of the bookstore, her eyes shining and her smile wide and welcoming.
For the first time since he got the news about the murder that had been committed using one of his books as a blueprint, Dan felt like there was light pushing through the darkness. He’d fallen into a pitch-black hole and even surrounding himself with endless sunshine hadn’t pulled him out. Seeing Jane was like having a bucket of ice water poured over his head. It was a shock, a catalyst, a summons. The universe had sent him a wake-up call.
His new book, his time in Angel Harbor, and Jane, were all part of Dan’s epiphany. Especially Jane.
They were close, their arms brushing as they made their way up the street to Sweet Chemistry. Dan loved the name of the place, and he’d stopped in there when he first came back to town when the smell coming from the inside was too much to resist.
The business had an amazing story to boot. The brainchild of a former industrial chemist, Viti Prasad found she liked mixing butter, sugar, eggs, and chocolate more than messing with acids and bases. The shop created the most amazing pastries, donuts, hand-poured chocolates, cakes, and desserts from here to the Hamptons, and based on what he’d seen, Jane was addicted. She kept a stock of Viti’s cookies and croissants in the treat case at the bookshop and there was rarely a day that she had anything left over.
With polished black and white tile floors, sparkling stainless steel, gleaming wood and brass accents for a vintage touch, Sweet Chemistry looked like a cross between an old-fashioned ice cream parlor and a lab.
As he should have expected, the shop was packed when they arrived. The crowd, which skewed older, was happily chatting and laughing while sipping coffee and eating Viti’s goodies. There wasn’t a seat to be had—even the window seat was taken.