by Mary Monroe
Reverend Upshaw shook his head and gave Ruby a tortured look. “You ain’t goin’ to believe what went on in that woman’s house tonight,” he said stiffly, the caterpillarlike brow above his right eye twitching.
“What ... what went on in that woman’s house tonight?” She was so frightened and nervous, she had a hard time controlling her bladder. Not only had she left her panties behind at Simone’s house, but the balled up toilet paper that had been used to plug up her vagina had slid out during her walk from the garden to the front door. She could feel fluid sliding slowly down her thighs. All she could hope for was that if her daddy saw blood or urine or whatever else was dripping from underneath her dress, he’d be too squeamish and too embarrassed to mention it.
Reverend Upshaw did notice streams of bloody urine slowly rolling down his daughter’s naked legs, and he was too squeamish to mention it. At least not directly. What were those damn things females used as a sop during their bloody days each month? He couldn’t remember, and it was just as well because he was not about to bring up that subject. “You really need to go back yonder and ... take care of yourself before your condition gets worse.”
“Daddy, I am fine now,” Ruby protested, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. “I’ll feel even better once you tell me what’s wrong at Simone’s house, for Othella to come get you out of bed this time of night.”
Reverend Upshaw cleared his throat and looked around the room, and behind him toward the door leading down the hall before he spoke again. “There’s a baby involved, and it’s one ugly mess,” he stated, glancing toward the hall again.
Temporarily speechless and so terrified that she could barely remain conscious, Ruby staggered back a few steps. She was still wondering, if Othella had spilled the beans, why her father hadn’t slapped her through the wall by now.
“Now don’t you be gettin’ all upset,” Reverend Upshaw said, his hand on Ruby’s shoulder, holding her in place. What he said next confused and relieved her. “This ain’t got nothin’ to do with you.”
“It ... don’t?”
“Of course it don’t! Why would it? So there ain’t no need for you to be lookin’ so distressed.”
Ruby blinked and folded her arms, more curious than ever now.
“One of Simone’s loosey-goosey, feebleminded colored female cousins dumped off a baby at Simone’s house tonight.” Reverend Upshaw was clearly angry. His jaw was twitching, and he had balled both of his hands into fists. “After that heifer dropped off that poor baby, she took her tail right back out in the street, headin’ for another juke joint!” he hollered, shaking one fist in the air. “And guess what that peanut-size-brain hussy done before she left?” He didn’t wait for Ruby to guess the answer. “She left instructions for Simone to carry the child to some orphan asylum for the time bein’. Simone wanted it to get blessed first. That’s why she sent for me. As big a heathen as Simone is, wasn’t that a righteous thing for her to do?”
Ruby nodded. “It sure enough was,” she agreed.
She was relieved to hear that her role in this mess had not been revealed. But she was still nervous, frightened, and paranoid. And she would be until this nightmare was over.
CHAPTER 18
AS IF RUBY WAS NOT ALREADY IN ENOUGH PAIN—PHYSICALLY, emotionally, and spiritually—her head felt like it was going to explode like a hand grenade. Her eyes felt like they were sizzling each time she blinked.
It was a struggle, but somehow she managed to get the words out of her mouth. “I ... I can’t believe Simone’s cousin is turnin’ her baby over to a ... asylum.”
Reverend Upshaw nodded. “I can’t believe it neither. Or I should say that I don’t want to believe it. That poor little baby might never know her real kinfolks. I swear to God, Negroes are goin’ to hell in a handbasket. Havin’ babies and dumpin’ ’em off on some stranger is usually a white woman’s folly. At least with us colored folks, we always find a relation to drop off a unwanted baby on.” Reverend Upshaw paused and shook his head. “This is a sin and a shame. In all the days of my life, I ain’t never knowed of no colored woman to give up her baby to strangers in a asylum ... until now.”
Ruby agreed that it was a sin and a shame for a colored woman to give up her baby to strangers for them to raise. But she couldn’t get those words out of her mouth. All she could say next was, “Oh.” She felt faint. It felt like her brain was swimming around in her head. For a moment she thought her legs were going to buckle and that she’d end up on the floor in a heap. That was the last thing she wanted to happen. Dr. Hollis would be summoned and she’d be exposed for sure. She felt woozy, but she didn’t know if it was from the beer she’d consumed at Othella’s party or because she’d given birth, or both. And it didn’t matter. The only thing that did matter was that she could not let her father know the truth about what she’d done tonight.
Like a chair with weak legs, Ruby backed up until she touched the wall and that was the only thing that kept her from falling to the floor. She stood against the wall, wanting to disappear into it. But she needed to know more about why Simone had sent for her father instead of Reverend Meacham.
“Ruby Jean, before you go back to bed, go get my Bible off the bureau in the back bedroom,” Reverend Upshaw ordered, patting his hair. “And you might as well bring me one of my hymn books, too. And for God’s sake, don’t wake your mama up. This mess would upset her. You know how she loves babies,” he added. “She’ll be wantin’ to keep it!”
Ruby also needed to know exactly what Othella and Simone had told her daddy about this mysterious colored cousin of Simone’s. “Uh ... what else did they say about this colored cousin? Which one was it?”
“What difference do it make? You don’t know them folks. All you need to know is that the whole clan is bad news, and that’s why me and Mother don’t want you hangin’ around with Othella.” Reverend Upshaw plucked a large white handkerchief from the breast pocket of his jacket and mopped sweat off his face. “I’m surprised that Othella ain’t got herself in the family way yet. But it’s just a matter of time before she do. Maybe if I did let you hang out with her, you’d be a good influence on her, huh?” He smiled approvingly at his daughter.
“Maybe so, Papa,” Ruby agreed. “Maybe so.”
“But you ain’t to fool around with that girl! She’d be more of a bad influence on you than you’d be a good influence on her. Both of y’all might end up lost and in the family way at the same time.”
“Can I go with you?” Ruby asked in a small voice, holding her breath because the question had slid out of her mouth before she could stop it.
“Say what?” Reverend Upshaw gasped. “Why would you want to go with me, girl? The mess Simone got goin’ on might be too traumatic for you to get involved in.”
“I want to see Simone’s cousin’s baby ... before they take it to that asylum,” she pleaded. Now that Ruby knew that Simone and Othella had concocted a story that her father had accepted, she decided that she was in the clear.
“Why in the world do you want to see somebody’s baby that you don’t even know? I don’t even know this female myself, and I thought I knew all of Simone’s folks. Them Cajuns and them colored ones on her grandma’s side. Hmmm?”
“I just want to see that baby.”
Reverend Upshaw gave Ruby a narrow-eyed look. “I still don’t know why. With your sisters trottin’ in and out of this house with all of them brats they got, how come you so hot to see another baby? Just last weekend you was complainin’ about havin’ to babysit your sister Lola’s three young’uns.”
“I know. I just wanted to see the kind of baby that a mother would give up to some asylum.”
“I’m kind of curious to see this child for that reason myself. Othella didn’t say, but it must be deformed or unspeakably homely. Maybe there’s a chance that I can talk Simone into keepin’ it and raisin’ it as her own. She got so many already, one more won’t make a difference.”
Ruby’s head fe
lt like it was going to roll right off her shoulders. She knew that Simone was a strong-willed woman, but Reverend Upshaw could talk people into doing just about anything. Simone had made it clear that she didn’t want to take a chance on having people find out that one of her sons had taken advantage of Ruby and gotten her pregnant. In spite of that, it was not that much of a stretch for Reverend Upshaw to talk Simone into keeping the baby, anyway. Especially once he got in her face with his Bible, beat her down with quotes from this scripture and that psalm, and then crooned a spiritual or two from his hymn book.
If that happened, Ruby was as good as dead. “Oh no, Daddy, don’t do that!” she hollered, almost jumping out of her shoes. Reverend Upshaw’s jaw dropped, so she immediately toned down her rant, using a much softer voice as she continued. “I hear all the neighbors talkin’ about how she complains about havin’ so many kids now. Why would you want to talk her into raisin’ another baby?”
“My role is to try and help people do the right thing. I don’t like the fact that there is a single colored child in somebody’s asylum, bein’ treated like God knows what. If you ask me, I’d say that the child would be better off with Simone. She is a Cajun to the bone, but she done fooled around with colored folks so much, and all of her kids is half colored; she is more like one of us in spirit. Me and the other church elders will do our part on her behalf. Despite her lowly status in the community, Simone knows that she can always get help from the church, and all of the spiritual comfort that she needs from me.”
Ruby panicked even more. If her father did convince Simone to keep the baby, Ruby was certain that she couldn’t go on. The way that Simone and Othella broadcasted their business when they drank, it wouldn’t be long before the whole real story came out! And even if one of those two blabbermouths didn’t talk, Ruby was afraid that she’d be the one to break down.
“Oh, Lord,” Ruby moaned.
“Look, you beginnin’ to look right sickly again. Almost as bad as you did durin’ supper. Ain’t there somethin’ in the cabinet in the bathroom that you can take for this thing that’s ailin’ you? I ain’t never seen you look so peaked and lackin’ in color.” Reverend Upshaw felt Ruby’s forehead. “You want me to go wake up Mother so she can tend to you?”
“Papa, I keep on tellin’ you, I’m all right.” Ruby stood back on her legs. “Maybe some more of that night air might do me some good. That’s another reason why I want to go to Simone’s house with you.” She gave her father a desperate look. “And I’d like to see them red tapestry drapes at her front windows that I’ve heard so much about, too.”
“Well ... I guess one visit to that hellhole won’t corrupt you. But just this one time!” Shaking a thick finger in Ruby’s face, the reverend added, “Don’t you ever tell Mother, or anybody else in this family, that I let you accompany me to Simone’s house. But it might do you some good to feel some of that negative energy that that woman and her young’uns generate.”
“And to see the kind of baby that a mother could give up,” Ruby added, following her father out the front door.
CHAPTER 19
“RUBY, WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU DOING HERE?” Othella, fully dressed in a fresh pair of jeans and one of her twin brother’s shirts, yelled as soon as she spotted Ruby standing on the front porch. It had been about two hours since Ruby had left Othella’s house. When Othella saw that Reverend Upshaw was standing off to the side out of her immediate view, she covered her mouth. “What I mean is, you ain’t never been to this house before.”
Simone ran into the living room. She had also changed into another outfit, a pair of brown corduroy pants and a loose-fitting, freshly ironed plaid blouse. She had put on fresh makeup and pinned her hair up into a bun on her head. She stopped right next to the lumpy couch. On the couch was a large cardboard box that contained Ruby’s baby, wrapped in the same pink towel as before.
“Reverend Upshaw, I didn’t want to bother you,” Simone apologized, waving him and Ruby into the house. “But Othella tried to get Reverend Meacham to come over here and bless my crazy cousin’s baby. But as he was gettin’ dressed, his lumbago started actin’ up, and then his back went out on him again. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have disturbed you.” Simone gave Ruby a curious look. “Uh, Ruby Jean is your name, right?”
“Yessum,” Ruby muttered, nodding. She was glad that Simone was cool enough to act like she didn’t know her that well in front of the reverend.
“You and my girl Othella was in some of the same classes last year, huh?”
“Yessum,” Ruby muttered again, her eyes on the box on the couch. Only the baby’s face was partially visible. She was sleeping, sucking on her knuckles like she had not eaten a thing since her birth, and she hadn’t. Ruby, her breasts swollen with milk, wanted to run to her baby and stick one of her nipples in her mouth. “Uh, I begged my papa to let me come see your cousin’s baby. I wanted to see the kind of baby that a colored woman would give up to strangers. What’s wrong with it?”
Othella and Simone looked at Ruby at the same time, and then they looked at one another and shrugged. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with my cousin’s baby,” Simone answered, a touch of contempt in her voice.
“Oh. I’m glad you ain’t goin’ to keep that baby,” Ruby said, putting a lot of emphasis on the word “keep.”
“Keep it? Oh no, honey child. I’ll tell anybody, it took a whole lot of steam out of me to keep the ones that I gave birth to. I’m goin’ to tell you the same thing that I told that cousin of mine; seven kids is more than enough for me to raise without a husband,” Simone said firmly, giving Ruby a conspiratorial glance and a wink. “I can guarantee you, I ain’t goin’ to keep this baby and raise it... .”
“I’m glad to hear you say that, Simone,” Ruby said with a sniff. She was relieved, but she didn’t want to get too comfortable yet. Simone and her father were both so unpredictable that there was no telling how this situation was going to end. “Raisin’ kids must be real hard to do, and like you said, seven is enough for you to be raisin’ without a husband.” Ruby swallowed hard. She was a little more relieved to know that Simone’s mind was made up. She had no intention or desire to keep this baby. But that still didn’t mean that the reverend wouldn’t try and get her to change her mind.
“If it wasn’t a shame, and me and Mother wasn’t so old and wore out, I might consider takin’ in this unwanted child myself,” Reverend Upshaw said, shaking his head. “I love kids, and I wish me and Mother had been blessed with a few more.” He bit his bottom lip and looked at Ruby. She froze and held her breath. What he had just said was the last thing that she wanted to hear. The only thing worse than Simone raising the baby girl was Ruby’s parents raising her!
“Reverend Upshaw, that’s a mighty generous notion for you to have, but I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Simone said, loud and clear. She paused long enough to clear her throat. “See, for one thing, my crazy cousin might try to come back and reclaim this child after you and your wife done got attached to it.”
“Babies don’t ask to be born,” Reverend Upshaw pointed out, mopping sweat off his face with his hand and then fanning his face with his hymn book. “And it’s a shame when one comes into this world that ain’t wanted.”
“True. Babies don’t ask to be born, and most young girls like Mama’s cousin don’t ask to get pregnant,” Othella said, giving Ruby the same kind of conspiratorial look and wink that Simone had offered.
“Young girl?” Reverend Upshaw asked, looking from Othella to Simone. There was a harsh tone in his voice now. “Exactly where is this young cousin? I’d like to meet her,” he added, one hand on his hip. “She sure sounds like she could use some spiritual comfort.”
“That heifer! Right after she dumped off her baby, she left this house runnin’ like a dog was chasin’ her. She’s back roamin’ around them juke joints,” Simone said quickly. “We tried to get her to stay here long enough to meet you, and to give this child a proper send off, and she said she would. B
ut as soon as she heard about another shindig goin’ on at one of them juke joints she can’t seem to stay out of, she took off.”
“I see. Well, it sure enough sounds like this sister is about as lost as she can be. You said she’s a young girl? Just how old is this cousin? She can’t be no young girl if she already got ten young’uns like Othella told me when she came to my house tonight,” Reverend Upshaw said, scratching the side of his neck.
Simone wasted no time responding to Reverend Upshaw’s comments. “She’s around my age. Crazy as a Bessie bug.”
“A sin and a shame. And exactly which one of your cousins is this baby’s mama?” Reverend Upshaw asked, shuffling over to the box on the couch. He leaned over and lifted the stiff towel so he could get a better look at the unfortunate baby. “If you want me to try and talk some sense into this child’s mama’s confused head—” He stopped talking as soon as he saw the baby’s whole face and the rest of her tiny body. Simone had wrapped a small pink towel around the baby like a T-shirt. Sadly and ironically, it looked more like a straight jacket—the same kind Simone had once been wrapped in during her residence at the asylum. A face cloth, also pink, had been pinned to the baby like a diaper. Reverend Upshaw stood up straight so fast he almost fell backward. From the frightened look on his face, anybody who didn’t know any better would have sworn that he’d just met Satan in person. “Oh, goodness gracious alive! This baby can’t be more than a few hours old!” His jaw dropped as he whirled around and looked from Simone to Othella again. “I thought y’all was talkin’ about a toddler, or at least a child that’s been around for a month or two!”
“Oh, didn’t I say it was a newborn?” Othella asked, feeling defensive. “I’m sure I must have, and you just forgot that part.”
“You ain’t said nothin’ about this bein’ no fragile newborn baby just a few hours old!” Reverend Upshaw insisted.