Katrice reached up and touched Angelina’s hair. “Your hair pretty.”
“Thank you,” Angelina said, and then she had a brilliant idea.
She picked up her phone and made the call that was necessary. Then she closed Katrice’s file and locked it in her desk draw. “Let’s go, baby. Let ’s go make us both prettier.”
An hour and half later they stepped into the McDonald ’s across from the Shine and Swing Hair Salon where Angelina had a standing weekly appointment. Katrice was a vision in cornrows and beads. The little girl was so excited. She’d had a wash and got to sit under the dryer. Terri, Angelina ’s hairstylist, was in between clients, so she gave the little girl special attention. Katrice even got a coat of clear nail polish from the manicurist. It was the most fun Angelina had had in a long time, and there was a light in the little girl’s eyes that she’d never seen.
McDonald ’s was an adventure. Angelina had to admit she’d never really paid attention to the play areas for children. Katrice behaved like she’d never been inside one. Angelina had no doubt that the little girl hadn’t. After all, her foster mother ’s level of trifling had only been exceeded by the child ’s natural mother’s.
“I think it’s time for us to leave,” Angelina announced when Katrice came out of the ball pit for the third time and took a sip of her fruit punch. Angelina glanced at her watch. She hated for the fun to end, but it was getting late. It was almost seven, and she’d told the foster mother she’d have her home by seven-thirty. “I have to take you back to Ms. Henry’s house.”
“I don’t wanna go Ms. Henry. I stay with you.”
Angelina sat back in the chair. A wave of emotions assailed her because in truth, she was beginning to feel like she didn’t want to let Katrice go. She had facilitated foster parent certification classes for years. One of the standing lessons in the course taught that foster parents could not get attached to children. They had to be prepared at any time for the children to go home. Now she realized how preposterous that statement was. How does one not fall in love with a child like Katrice? She was sweet, well-mannered, and that smile ... it was melting Angelina ’s heart more and more every time she saw the child.
“Don’t you want to show Ms. Henry your pretty hair? I bet she’ll be glad she doesn ’t have to tussle with it tonight.”
Katrice ’s face was marred with a frown, and her eyes filled with tears. “I wanna stay with you.”
Angelina let out a breath and reached under the table for the child’s shoes. “Come on, baby, I have to take you home, but I promise we’ll do this again. We’ll make your hair pretty and we’ll come to McDonald’s, okay?”
“Not home.” Katrice shook her head. She raised her leg and let Angelina put her feet in her sneakers. All the joy that the little girl had been exhibiting seemed to slide down on the floor and disappear into the concrete.
They arrived at the Henry home a minute before Katrice’s promised delivery time, and Angelina removed the child from her car seat.
“Remember what I said,” Angelina whispered in a soft, affirming voice. “We’ll do it again real soon. And I’ll get my hair and nails done too, so we’ll be like best friends.” Angelina was careful not to use the word sisters.
“But I want you to be my mommy,” Katrice responded, big eyes shining with tears.
Angelina felt the wind rush out of her lungs. Mommy. She wanted to be somebody’s mommy so terribly bad, and all Katrice wanted was to be somebody ’s child. They were two of a kind. Both alone and looking for someone to love. “I’ll be back. I promise.” She knew she shouldn’t have said that. It was unfair to make promises to foster children. Her professional training taught her that was a no-no. But her heart—her heart was a part of her soul. The one Katrice had climbed into with every tender smile and word the little girl said.
Ms. Henry retrieved her at the door and thanked Angelina for getting Katrice such a pretty new hairdo. Angelina instructed Ms. Henry on how to care for it, handed her some hair products complete with a silk head scarf, and walked back to her SUV. She was determined not to turn around and see Katrice’s anguished face. She climbed in, started the vehicle, and finally unable to stop herself, she looked back at the house one more time. Nose pressed against the glass, Katrice was still standing there.
“I want you to be my mommy,” she’d cried. Angelina wanted to cry with her because she wondered why she couldn ’t be somebody’s mommy.
Chapter 18
“Angelina, you’re not going to believe this.” I turned my laptop monitor around so she could read an email.
I watched her scan it, and then her face broke into a smile. “You’re amazing.”
I beamed. Getting Curvaceous Fitness Center to come and do body fat measurements had been an idea that came to me early yesterday morning when I was brainstorming. “Cool that they said yes. We are going to have so many booths and stations and giveaways. It ’s going to be a really successful event.”
“I hope the local media shows up and takes some pictures.” Angelina beamed. “It would be good publicity for the church.”
I bit my tongue. I wanted media coverage too, but I couldn ’t pursue it. I was working undercover. Samaria Jacobs couldn’t be caught being Rae Burns. My fabulous health fair could make it on the nightly news broadcast, and Greg might see me. So while I was sure this was my big chance to get on Fox 5 Atlanta or one of the other stations and sell my consulting business, the media was out. Greg’s checks were a definite thing. My mama taught me about having a bird in the hand.
“Have you tried to get some PR?” Angelina asked.
“I’ve contacted all the major media outlets.” My shrug was indifferent. “So we’ll see.” I didn’t want Angelina to make calls to local television and radio stations herself. Although I doubted I needed to really be concerned about that. She didn ’t seem to have time. She was busy every day with the child death case family services had botched up. The media wouldn ’t let it go. We’d been working together pretty closely every day, and the text messages and phone calls about the case never stopped. I was starting to feel sorry for her. The worry lines were aging her. A sista needed a massage and facial herself.
Angelina picked up a note in my pile of things to do. “I see you still don’t have the banner for the opening.”
“I’ve been trying to find someone to pay for the thing. Haven ’t gotten a taker.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll ask my husband’s practice to donate it.” She reached into her bag. “But before I forget, let me get him on the phone.”
Angelina removed her cell phone and pressed what I assume was a speed dial number. I’d never seen her talk to Greg up close. I couldn’t wait to see how they interacted, even if it were a one sided observation.
“Hi, babe, how are you?”
Angelina did some nodding and mumbled some yeahs and um-hums before saying, “I’m at the church.” More yeahs and um-hums. “Look, before I forget, I wanted to ask for a favor. You know we’re having the health fair, and we don’t have anyone to pay for the banner for the door. I was wondering ... After a couple of seconds a smile filled her face. “Thanks, hon.” She made an okay sign with her free hand. “Look, I’d like to talk to you this evening. We still never had our conversation.” She nodded and listened for a minute or more. Then she said, “Okay,” and ended the call.
No “I love you” was exchanged.
I couldn ’t read her. She looked pretty neutral about it. Either he had blown her off again and she didn ’t want me to see it, or he had agreed, and she was nervous about it. I was dying to know what she wanted to talk to him about.
“Your husband is pretty generous. What kind of business does he run?”
“He’s a physician. A surgeon. He has a practice downtown.” Her voice had dropped an octave.
“Oh, I didn’t know he was in healthcare. What’s his specialty? I work with a few hospitals. Maybe I’ve met him.”
“Neurosurgery.”
Angelina looked me right in the eyes and nodded. I could tell she wasn’t impressed.
“Will we see him at the health fair?”
She laughed, but the throaty sound was not filled with joy. “Not as long as the grass is still green at the Dunwoody Golf & Tennis Club.”
“What about church? I know I haven’t been that much; does he attend?”
“No, I wish he did. He went to church in college, but after we got married, he started working long hours during his residency, and then he stopped. It’s been a long time since he’s attended regularly.” Angelina had a sad, forlorn look on her face. “But he’s a good man,” she added. “He has a good heart.”
Good hearted. Hmmm. Not sure I would use those words to describe Greg, especially with respect to her. “What would you do if you found out he wasn’t the person you think he is?”
“I’d be disappointed, but I wouldn’t be surprised. Why? Are you going through something like that yourself?”
I thought about Mekhi. I had been through something like that, but I really asked the question to find out where her head was. “No, I mean, maybe. Tell me why you wouldn’t be surprised?”
“Because when people are backslidden or unsaved, you never know what they’re going to do. They don’t have the Holy Spirit guiding them the way a person does who’s in relationship with Christ.”
“So you’d forgive him for anything?”
She looked at me like I was silly. “I’m not saying that. But I know we’re unevenly yoked, which means not on the same level spiritually. So we’re going to have issues because of that.”
“See, that’s why the Bible is a trip to me. What’s with the yoke talk?”
Angelina laughed. “The Bible was written more than two thousand years ago, and it was translated by scholars and scribes. They talked like that.”
“Well, I need a plain English Bible. One that tells it like it is.” I laughed, and she laughed with me. “But seriously, if you and your husband are uneven, shouldn’t you go try to be with someone you’re yoked right with?”
“It’s not that simple. First of all the Bible tells us that God is a covenant God. Vows to God are not supposed to be broken. Secondly, the Bible also tells us that God hates divorce, so He expects us to try hard to make our marriages work, not quit on each other.”
Even when lavender panties are involved, I thought. “Those don’t seem like reasons to stay in a marriage if you’re not yoked.” I kept throwing my new word out. “Seems to me to have the peace you keep saying Jesus brings, you need the right man.”
My cell phone rang, and I picked it up quickly when I heard Greg’s special tone.
“You get that.” Angelina stood. “I’m going to the ladies room.”
I opened the phone, but waited until I was sure she was out of ear shot. “Hey, big daddy.”
“I was about to hang up,” Greg grumbled. “Look, I can’t make it tonight.”
I rolled my eyes. “Why not? I was looking forward to giving you a real special treat.”
“I’m sure you were. Something’s come up with my wife. I have to have dinner with her tonight or she’s going to blow a gasket.”
“Can we get together early?”
“I’m not out of surgery until around three, and by the time I clean up and head home, it’ll be too late. I can’t swing it.”
“But Gr ... baby.” I changed my tune when Angelina walked back into the room. “I have to work for the next three nights. We won’t see each other.”
He groaned. Angelina sat down and began shuffling through papers.
“Three nights in a row? You’ve never done that before.”
“I had to take the work they had. You never know when it’s going to be a lull in the schedule.” The truth was, three nights were going to give me the latitude I needed to steal drugs.
“Well, I guess we’ll have to try and do an early morning. I have to go home tonight.”
“Fine. I’m in a meeting, so let me finish up, and I’ll talk to you later.” I closed the phone.
“Soooo,” Angelina sang through a wide smile. “There is a man?”
I nodded and put my phone in my purse. “Yes, I’ve been dating him for a little while.”
“Is it serious?”
“I don’t know. Depends on what you mean by serious.”
“Is he important to you? Do you love him?”
“No, I’m not coo coo for cocoa puffs if that’s what you mean. He’s important to me, but love—I love his wallet.” I chuckled to myself. “I love that a lot.”
“A wallet can’t keep you warm at night.”
“With money you can buy a Ralph Lauren goose down comforter that can.”
“But the pleasure of the comforter only lasts until the new smell wears off. Then it won’t matter what’s on the bed, only who’s in it.”
I had to give it to her. That was a good comeback. Still easier said than done when you had it all. “I think I’ll have to see that for myself.” I handed her a flyer for the event. “Brother James is going to have the youth put these on car windows at the mall and three of the supermarkets this weekend to advertise some more.”
Angelina looked at it and nodded. I could see she had retreated back into her thoughts about Greg.
“So.” I decided to go for it. I had to get her talking or all this mentoring stuff wasn’t going to benefit me. “Do you want to share this big topic you want to talk to your husband about? Angelina looked at me like I had two heads. “Sometimes it’s good to get an objective person’s thoughts, and since I hardly know you and definitely don’t know him, I could be a good sounding board.”
“It’s nothing I need an opinion about. We have to discuss something and make a decision.”
“Oh.” I crossed my arms and feigned indignance. “I thought this thing with us was a two way street.”
Angelina let out an easy breath. “It is, but there’s no pressure on either side to talk.”
I decided to go for the juggler. I mean, why not? I was a juggler cutting type of gal. “Angelina, do you mind if I ask you something personal?”
“I don’t mind if you don’t mind if I don’t want to answer.” She winked at me.
“You’ve been married for more than ten years, right?”
“Yes. Thirteen. I think I told you that before. Why?”
“I was wondering why you don’t have kids?”
Angelina shrank like a balloon that was losing its air, but it wasn’t air, it was blood. I had cut the juggler vein, and she was bleeding. Visibly. The look on her face told me that this was an extremely painful topic for her. I had to find out the deal. I needed to know if it were something I could use, but I did feel guilty.
Angelina reached into her pocket for her vibrating phone. She took one look and stood from the table. An escape. How convenient for her. I listened to her side of the conversation. Something about a budget cut. When she was done, she began to pack her things. “Sorry to leave you hanging, but I have to go.”
“But we’re not finished.”
“Rae, you are more than competent. I trust you to make good decisions on anything else that has to be decided.”
She was rattled, and it wasn’t just the phone call that had her smashing things into her Coach bag like she was putting waste in a trash bag. With the way she was behaving, I really wanted to know.
“Angelina, did I upset you?”
“No.” She answered too quickly. She was unconvincing. “I have to get to the office. We’re trying to allocate some money for a program that may help with foster home evaluations and oversight.”
“You were upset before the phone rang. You were upset when I asked you why you never had children.”
Angelina put her handbag on her shoulder and picked up her attaché. She looked like she was using them to hold herself up. I had bought up children, and the molecules in the air had adjusted
, made it harder for her to breathe, but I wanted to know, so I pushed. “I’m sorry if I upset you. I was curious, you seem to really love kids. I mean, you’ve got the non-profit and you’re on the DFYS board. Lord bless you for that. Seems you would make a good mother. I was wondering why you never had any of your own.”
Tears wet her eyes. Sadness seemed to leak from her pores. She opened her mouth, closed it and swallowed hard before speaking. “I did have a child. I had a baby girl, but she died two years ago.”
Both hands flew to my lips. “Oh gosh. I’m sorry. What happened to her? I mean, if you don’t mind. Oh no, I’m sorry ... I shouldn’t have asked that.” I was stumbling over the words in earnest. I mean, a dead baby. That was messed up.
“SIDs.” The word came out of her mouth, but I could tell it made a painful journey from her soul.
“Oh,” I whispered, not sure what else to say.
“I have a hard time with that mysterious cause of death, but that was it. One moment she was here, and the next she wasn’t.”
I stood and wrapped my arms around her. I had no idea where that instinct had come from. It was she who stepped out of my embrace. Tears had stained her face. I reached into my bag for a tissue and handed it to her. “I’m sorry I made you think about it. I’m really so sorry. It was silly of me.”
“No. It’s okay. I get asked all the time, and really, I think about Danielle everyday anyway.”
“Danielle is a pretty name.” I decided to pass on saying anything deeper. I couldn’t imagine what would be appropriate.
“She was a beautiful baby.” Angelina seemed like she was a million miles away when she said that.
“I’m sure with such great genes. I mean, she had to be, right?”
“But now she’s in heaven, so—I mean.” Angelina stopped. “I’ll have to keep trying to live the best life I can so I can see her again.”
“You mean like in the after-life?” I asked, unable to mask that I didn’t believe that crap.
“We’ll have to talk about it one day, Rae. I’d love to really talk about Christianity with you. I can tell you have a lot of misgivings, but I believe there’s something that drew you to Greater Christian Life. I’ll call you later, and we’ll set up a real girl-to-girl study session.”
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