by David Archer
"Um…" Melanie sniffed, drumming her fingers on the table and then setting her hand close to Jade's, though she never made contact. "I can answer more questions, if you have 'em."
Jade shrugged. "If you want to take a break, we can. Summer said she was going to look for another technical-electronic-computer-related case, and even if she can't find one right away, we're telling North Forest Hospital we need you to help us complete the reports. You'll be staying with Detective Darren tonight." Jade lowered her voice and leaned forward. "He's got a freakin' house."
Melanie blinked in surprise and then chuckled a little, almost like a giggle. She blew her nose and crumpled the tissue in her fist, giving Jade a small smile. "So, are you gonna tell me what the manipulative-sounding part of all this is?"
Jade expressed surprise for a moment, but she quickly eased her expression into a smile. "Uh, sure." She leaned back in her chair, stretching her arms over her head. "We noticed some… odd things about Eric… his behavior, his medications, his files, how North Forest Hospital was… managing things involving him." She constructed the sentence as carefully as she could. "It was Sam who first put it together, actually."
To her surprise, Melanie offered a slight nod. "He's good at reading people. He's…" She bit her tongue, looked at Jade, and then looked away. "Wanna know the code?"
Jade took a moment to process the question, but she thought back to the talk on the plane and immediately nodded. "Yeah. That's been bugging me for days—though, you should know, Darren is pretty sure he figured the coffee part out."
Melanie gave a little smile. "Color was first, and there are four answers to that. Green, yellow, red, and black. It works just like a traffic light, and black is if you don't know. It gives you an idea of how much someone will allow. If they're red, you're not going to get away with anything, and you'll probably get in trouble for things you can't control. If they're yellow, you won't be able to get away with anything, but they aren't unreasonable. Green people are pushovers."
Jade whistled lowly. "Man, I can't believe you called Sam a pushover."
Melanie bit her lip nervously. "Don't tell him?"
Jade chuckled. "Tell him what?"
Melanie didn't quite laugh, but she did smile and shake her head. "Well, one of the other things I asked was what kind of candy you guys are. He said penny, as in penny candy. So, you're traditional. You might not be open to the idea of consultants like us, but in a 'don't ask, don't tell' kind of way, if we don't try and use our brains to get into trouble, you're going to treat us with a certain level of respect just because we're human beings."
"Unconditional Positive Regard," Jade replied, nodding understandingly. "It's the belief that human beings have a right to be loved simply because they are human beings. You don't have to accept or even like them, but you acknowledge they are human and that means they have a right to love, no matter what they've done or do or will do." That was a very loose definition, but she wasn't about to give a dissertation.
Melanie nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, that's it exactly. So, when you said sir Sam is the one who noticed something was wrong… that makes sense to me, because someone with what the code defines as a traditional way of thinking is going to look at what they expect from 'normal' people and make judgements from that. Sometimes, that's not so great, because some abnormal things aren't so bad, but in other ways… penny candy people are the only ones who stop and say, 'Um, this shouldn't be happening because it just shouldn't.' And they don't need any other reason to justify their point of view."
Jade felt herself growing more excited as the talk continued. Not only was she getting information, but Melanie appeared to be opening up to her, and—to be perfectly honest—the communication technique was a fascinating way to get around such strict limitations on speech.
"So, what other—?"
"Melanie."
Both women turned to look at Eric, who had come up to the table rather suddenly. His arms were wrapped around himself, gripping the sleeves of the dark purple button down he had left hanging open, and his eyes were wide and glassy.
"Eric, what's wrong?" Melanie got to her feet so fast she almost knocked her chair over. "Eric? Hey, what's wrong?"
Eric stammered for a moment, lips wobbling as he fought not to cry. "Is it—is it true? Is Donny gone?"
Melanie froze, a look of shock and horror passing over her face. "Eric…" She shook her head a few times. "I mean, I haven't seen him, but no one—"
Eric choked out a sob and pressed a fist to his lips, hanging his head so his hair hid his face. "He's gone. He's gone, Melanie. I saw the papers."
Jade slowly got to her feet, watching as Melanie wrapped Eric in a tight hug, the latter dissolving into hysterics. She reached out and put a hand on each of their backs, ignoring the jumps she caused and gently rubbing in an attempt to offer comfort.
"Hey, what's wrong with Whiz Kid?"
Jade turned her head to see Denny leaving Sam's office, the majority of the team not far behind him; they had been trying to figure out their next move, but whether it was tears or time that adjourned the meeting, they were all coming toward the trio.
"I don't know," Jade replied. "Something about Donny?"
Summer frowned, coming around to standing on Eric's other side. "Yeah, they just sent the files, like, an hour before we landed. What's wrong with them?"
Eric gripped the sides of his head and suddenly shouted, "He's gone!" as if that explained everything.
Melanie hugged Eric tight, running a hand through his hair. "It's okay, Eric. Everything's gonna be okay."
Sam grabbed a chair and placed it behind Eric, urging him to sit down while Summer copied his move and pushed Melanie's chair closer to her.
"Melanie, do you know why Eric is so upset?" Sam prodded, his tone serious but not unkind. "Is there something we need to know?"
Melanie bit her lip as she sat, holding onto Eric's hands and watching him with pain in her eyes. "Donny… did his file say… did they retire him?"
Eric let out another sob at the question, already nodding.
Summer blinked. "Um, yes, we were told they took him out of the field."
Melanie looked at Summer for a moment, then at Sam, and finally at Jade. She stared with eyes screaming of vulnerability, her body practically shrinking as she peered up at the detective she had been so willing to talk to just moments earlier.
"Did you really mean what you said?" she whispered.
Jade frowned, confused. "I didn't lie about anything, if that's what you're asking."
"Are you really investigating North Forest Hospital because… you think they're… doing something bad? Maybe… maybe to patients?" Melanie's hands were shaking, and it was the sudden reappearance of halting sentences that triggered Jade's memory.
Sam said Eric's body language and speech patterns changed as soon as he was asked about secret assignments. Whatever is making them so upset, they're under strict orders not to talk about it.
So, Jade gave an encouraging smile and a nod. "Melanie, if it's something you're not supposed to talk about, it's still okay." She gestured to the space around them. "There's nobody here, just us." Meaning the mole was also out of the building, which was good because she had no idea how the next several minutes were going to play out.
Melanie continued to hold Eric's hands, toying with them and occasionally reaching up to stroke his hair or adjust his shirt, clearly needing something to fiddle with. "Retired… doesn't mean retired."
Jade didn't like the sound of that.
"Retired means… put down."
With that, Eric began sobbing, no longer able to keep himself together. He tore his hands away from Melanie and buried his face in them, doubling over in his chair and wailing loudly.
"Eric," Summer began, crouching on the floor beside him and giving his shoulder a shake. "Eric, talk to me."
Denny reached out, too, placing a hand on Eric's shoulder and giving it a squeeze. "Come on, whiz kid. You know
it's safe to tell us. Was it just unexpected? Kinda caught you off guard?"
Eric shook his head frantically. "No, no, no…"
"Melanie," Darren began, moving a little closer to where Jade was standing. "How often do consultants retire?"
Melanie thought about it for a moment, dashing her tears away and trying to look more put together than she was. "Um… I don't know, maybe… a couple times a year?"
Darren nodded grimly. "But this past month… there's been more. Right?"
Melanie squinted at him, swallowed hard, and then nodded. "Um, yeah."
"Was one of them named Cindy?" Sam spoke calmly, but Jade could tell from his body language that it took everything in him not to gather the two consultants into his arms and never let go. "We don't know her last name."
"Cindy, too?" Eric squeaked, another cry coming up his throat. "But—"
"She's alive," Sam quickly assured. "She was found in the back of the shipment truck still alive; right now, she's in the wind. We have no idea where she is, and we're going to let it stay that way for the foreseeable future."
Melanie heaved a sigh of relief, and while Eric appeared to stop crying for a brief moment, it didn't last. He was soon sobbing in full swing, as if there had never been a break at all, and they were still no closer to knowing the exact source of his distress.
"Did you have a fight with him before you left?" Summer asked softly. "Something you wanted to tell him, and you didn't get the chance?"
Eric shook himself violently. "It's my fault," he wailed. "It's my fault!"
Denny rubbed his shoulders. "Whiz kid, what are you talking about?"
"Donny's dead, and it's all my fault!" Eric repeated himself, as if that would make things clearer, and then he was sobbing again and mumbling under his breath.
"Eric…" Summer shook her head, speaking with as much sincerity as she could muster—and for Summer, that was a lot. "It was not your fault."
"Yes, it was!" Eric pulled his legs up onto the chair with him, trembling and shaking. "I was the one who—who told them, it was—it's my fault, oh God, please forgive me, I'm so sorry, it's all my fault…"
"Come on, man." Denny pulled on one of Eric's arms while Sam moved to get the other. "Come on, you've been doing really good. You haven't been acting like this at all lately."
"Take a deep breath, Eric," Sam ordered. "Take a deep breath, and after you're calm, tell us what you mean."
Eric only continued to shake his head, pulling against the hands keeping him from tearing at his own skin. He dropped his feet back to the floor and squirmed, but there wasn't a lot of fight behind the movements, and in less than ten seconds he was simply sitting there, hanging his head and crying quietly.
"Eric… it's okay." Summer rubbed his leg, squeezing his knee. "No matter what happened, no matter what you did, it's going to be okay."
Eric sucked air down and looked up at Sam, tears and snot smeared across his face. "I'm so sorry, Mr. Prichard."
Jade turned in a quick circle and grabbed the tissue box from the table, holding it out for Sam to take from, which he did.
"Shh, it's okay." Sam wiped Eric's face and leaned down, looking him in the eye. "Eric, it's okay. I promise."
Eric clenched his teeth, fresh tears welling up in his eyes, but he didn't let himself look away. "I—I did a bad thing, Mr. Prichard. I did a really bad thing."
"I believe you, but that doesn't mean things won't be okay." Sam grabbed another tissue and held it out, glancing at Denny to indicate he could let the other hand go.
Eric blew his nose and tossed the paper aside thoughtlessly. "I… I told them about Donny." He hiccupped, and as Sam opened his mouth to question further, Eric shrank in on himself and blurted out the rest. "I told North Forest Hospital you were investigating Donny."
TWENTY-THREE
Silence.
Jade looked around at her teammates, hoping someone would have a better handle on the situation than her, but they were all expressing equal levels of shock and confusion. Even Melanie's face was twisted up with bewilderment; she hadn't known about him reporting to North Forest Hospital, either.
Sam—God bless Sam, his patience, and his unnaturally large heart—moved so he was right in front of Eric and knelt down. He pushed away Summer's and Melanie's hands, albeit gently, and took Eric by the elbows. He kept Eric's arms at his sides, allowing the distraught kid to grab onto Sam's forearms in a similar fashion, and when he spoke, it was the perfect blend of concern, warmth, seriousness, and love.
"Eric, I want you to tell me what you've been doing. Start at the beginning and walk me through; help me understand why you did what you did." Sam squeezed Eric's arms. "I'm not angry with you, Eric." He looked around. "Is anyone on this team angry with him?"
"No way." Summer was the first to reply.
She was partly overlapped by Denny, who said, "Just worried, whiz kid; you're scaring me."
Jade added, "No, not at all."
Darren said, "Not a chance."
Sam squeezed Eric's arms again. "No one is angry."
Eric bit his lip hard. "You should be." He whimpered. "You're gonna hate me."
"I swear to you, Eric, we will not hate you. Even if what you have to say does make us angry, we will not hate you. Look at me." Sam let go of Eric's arm long enough to gently turn his head. "I could never hate you. Do you understand? Never."
Eric shuddered through a quiet sob and screwed his eyes shut. "I told you I didn't want to be alone." It took everyone a moment to return to Eric's first night at Windlass. "I knew this was gonna happen."
"We shouldn't have done that," Sam said softly. "What happened while we were gone?"
"Got a letter. One of the people who dropped me off left it under the desk over there." Eric pointed without looking up, face awash with shame and fear. "North Forest Hospital said if you showed any interest in investigating them, I had to keep them updated." He sniffed hard, scratching Sam's sleeve but clearly not getting the relief he did from scratching himself. "It didn't look like it would be a problem at first, but then… but then you kept me, and… I didn't want to go back, and even if I did, I wasn't allowed—not until you lost interest—and I…"
Darren cleared his throat softly. "Is that why your fear of being left alone dropped off after those first couple days?"
Eric nodded miserably. "Once I got the orders… it didn't matter anymore. I knew what I had to do, and nobody else saw me get the orders… so that night, at Summer’s house, I called them to confirm I got the letter. It took less than thirty seconds… and Summer was sound asleep." He looked at Summer for a brief moment, and then he looked at Sam and hung his head again. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, please forgive me. I'm so, so sorry."
"Shh." Sam squeezed his arms and began rubbing the limbs, applying pressure in what Jade assumed was an attempt to offer the same comfort of scratching without all the damage. "I forgive you, Eric. I just want to know what happened, that's all."
Summer managed a smile. "I couldn't hold a grudge against you even if I wanted to, Eric."
Eric hiccupped, shrinking into himself a bit as if to hide from their words—anger was something he was familiar with, but forgiveness was a strange and foreign idea to him.
He was afraid, Jade realized. More than anything else, he was afraid.
"Um, a-after… after I fought with you—uh, with Mr. Prichard about Lee Ramey… I walked to the house to… to work with Summer." He sniffed.
"I remember," Sam encouraged, still rubbing his arms.
"Well, I—I stole some money from an officer's wallet before I left…" He drooped under the weight of another rush of guilt. "…I went to a store and got change, found a payphone… and I called them to update."
Jade kept her outer expression masked, but inside, she was caught somewhere between cursing and wincing sympathetically. Eric was raw and upset, they needled information out of him, and found out his behavior was poor. They thought setting him off in the field would keep causing proble
ms until we got sick of him and gave up, so they pushed the Landsdown suicide case into our path. They traded one trigger for another, trying to press every button Eric had so he would burn out and the team would understand how necessary the medications and strict behavior control was.
"Is that why you were panicking when you got there, Eric?" Denny asked softly, rubbing Eric's shoulders again. "You didn't want to talk to them?"
Eric looked up at him, bottom lip wobbling. "It was both. I—I was upset because of the call, but I didn't want you to send me back. I didn't want to go back, and I…" He choked out a few more sobs and dropped his head. "I'm sorry."
Denny squeezed his shoulders again. "Don't, kid. Not to me, okay?"
Eric nodded weakly, and Sam waited a moment before gently instigating the talk again. "So, you called them during the Ramey case. What happened next?"
"I… I couldn't call them again until I was waiting in your office the morning after we got back from the case. I told them… I told them I was pretty sure you were going to send me back."
Sam nodded understandingly. "Is that why they were so upset when I tried to get files from them instead?"
Eric offered a faint nod.
"Did they hurt you because of that?"
Eric shook his head. "I got yelled at. That's all." He sniffed, gripped Sam's arms, and sniffed again. "It wasn't… wasn't hard to figure out you and Detective Darren were taking a close look at my files. I got left alone enough that I could update them on that. I got kept back for the next case… and they were happy about that. I… I didn't tell them that you said I could stay permanently. I… I still haven't. I'm too scared."