by B. T. Narro
I stopped. I couldn’t ride at night. My horse could trip, and I didn’t have the capability to make light for long enough for it to matter.
And it wasn’t safe. Valinox could return with Endell if they spotted me alone.
Rage came over me. I slammed my fist into the bed over and over until I couldn’t anymore. I collapsed to the floor when I was done.
I saw that the red diamond had fallen during my fit. I picked it up.
“I don’t know if you can hear me, but I’m at the Yorn Manor in Livea. I’m leaving for the castle tomorrow morning. If you want a life filled with purpose, you will stop running and meet me here. Otherwise, you’d better prepare to go into hiding until you are forgotten. You can trust me so long as I can trust you. We need your help in this war. Rohaer must be defeated.”
I listened for any reply. I felt like Hadley had heard me. I could even feel when she replied back, but I couldn’t tell what she was saying.
No matter. I was ready to get out of here with or without her. Kataleya could spend the rest of her life away from the war, seeing to the needs of her husband, for all I cared.
Blaming me for the death of her father…I cursed her aloud. I thought she knew me better than that. I wouldn’t ever let someone die just because I didn’t like them.
Something within me was about to break. I felt tears coming that were far too strong for me to have any hope of stopping them.
I held it together for a little while longer, stripping off my blood-soaked clothes and crawling into bed. Then I pulled the covers over my head and let my tears break me.
I cried myself to sleep just like the night after Father had died. It was the only time I had felt more alone than I did now.
I awoke sometime later as I realized something with fear. Valinox had wanted me dead more than he did Kataleya’s father.
“The healer first.”
There had been malice in his eyes. He didn’t just want me dead so I couldn’t heal Whitley. He wanted me dead because I was a thorn in his side, because I had made things difficult for him and would continue to do so.
There was probably no one he wanted dead more than me.
I imagined Valinox had heard that I would be visiting Livea. He had most likely visited Endell, knowing he had a vengeance against his cousin. It was Valinox who’d devised this plan, I had to assume. It was he who had nothing to lose because he knew we wouldn’t be able to kill him before he escaped. If Endell failed and died, so what? Valinox had many more people at his disposal.
But then again, were any of them the kind of army commander that Endell was? Perhaps he wanted Endell alive after all. Perhaps he was taking him back to Rohaer right now.
No. They would come back for me. They were not done here.
I threw off the covers and faced myself in the mirror, but it was Valinox who I imagined in front of me.
“You’re not going to come for me again until there’s little risk, like you did today. For a demigod, you’re such a goddamn coward.”
But what could I do about that? Valinox could travel across the continent like a bird. I couldn’t catch a bird.
I sat on my bed, dejected.
What was stopping Valinox from bringing Endell upon me while I rode my horse back to the castle? I couldn’t beat Valinox and Endell without assistance. I could only hope Souriff would come to my rescue. She’d notified us that she had been following her brother, trying to put a stop to everything he hoped to accomplish. But where had she been tonight?
I shuddered to think that there was something more important than saving my life and Whitley’s, but I assumed that had to be the case.
CHAPTER EIGHT
I didn’t speak to Hadley in my dreams like I had before. I got up early, made sure I had everything packed, and was about to risk a lone trip to the castle when there was a knock at the door.
“Jon, I, um. Can we talk?” It was Kataleya.
“Come in,” I said bitterly.
Her eyes were red and puffy, her hair disheveled. But she was dressed for the day, with a tunic and a hood.
She closed the door after her and came a little closer. “I’ve been thinking about what happened. I can’t stop thinking about it,” she corrected herself. “I know you must’ve feared I would die, and that’s the only reason you didn’t heal my father more before you came to my aid. It wasn’t because you wanted him to die. You would never let him die on purpose.”
I nodded. “I saw Endell stab you in your heart.”
“I think I was in too much shock to realize it at the time, but now I understand you saved my life. I’m sorry for what both my mother and I said to you. We were angry and looking for someone to blame. I spoke to her, and we both want to apologize.”
“I appreciate you coming here and telling me that. I forgive you and your mother.”
“Thank you.” She opened her mouth as if to say something else but didn’t speak as she looked down.
“I understand what you’re feeling right now,” I said. “It’s normal to blame yourself and even your father. It’s normal to be angry. I went through the same thing. For a long time, I was angry with my father when I wasn’t furious at myself for not doing more.”
She nodded, her eyes glistening.
“Can I give you some advice about it?”
“Please,” she said.
“You’re going to forgive him and yourself eventually. It might be a few days, weeks, or even years, but it’s going to happen. This wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t his fault. It was because of Valinox and Endell that this happened. They are the ones to blame.”
“You’re right,” she said, but there was nothing in her tone that suggested she agreed.
“Right now, there’s no reason for you to make any big decisions. You can figure out how you feel later.” She was nodding as I continued. “I think you should come back to the castle with me. I know your father had a lot of business with the king. Someone needs to pick up the slack that your father’s death has created. There isn’t time to let things fall through the cracks.”
“Yes, I know. But there’s the matter of Trevor. He will be arriving later today.” She spoke of this as if it was a great inconvenience.
“Can’t you tell him to come back another time?”
“I need to speak to him.”
“Kat, you don’t need to do anything like that. He would understand. Your father was just killed. And if he doesn’t get that, then Trevor is not someone who cares enough about you to marry you.”
I was surprised when she started to weep and sat on my bed next to me. I put my arm around her.
For a while, she just cried as I embraced her. Nothing needed to be said.
There was one thing that might make her feel better if she knew, though.
“I’m going to kill him, Kat.”
She stopped crying. “Who, Endell?”
I took my arm back. “Maybe him as well, but I was talking about Valinox. I’m furious about this, and it makes me even angrier to know that this can’t be over until Valinox is dead.”
She looked at the floor. “But there’s no way without a trap.”
“That’s exactly my line of thinking. A trap will have to be set. He must die, Kat. The sooner the better.”
She put her hand on top of mine. “I fear you are only going to get yourself killed when you think like this. You cannot trap a demigod like Valinox. I talked this through with my father, who also had discussions with the king. If a trap could’ve been set, it would’ve been done already.” Her face held anger as she looked at me. “Nobody wants revenge more than I do, but the last thing I want is you getting yourself killed because of this.”
“Does that mean you will come back to the castle with me?” I asked.
She had a breath. “Yes. I have just now decided. My mother has assured me that Father had prepared her for his passing. She can handle his affairs on her own, at least for a time.”
My heart lifted. “So you will conti
nue to fight with me?”
“I will, unless my mother needs me. But she might, Jon. I have to warn you as I will the king when I speak with him about this. I might be needed in more ways than just my sorcery. I’m a Yorn with a certain understanding about how things work. Do you know what I mean? It’s important to me that not only you do, but the rest of the sorcerers do as well.”
“Of course, Kat. I and the others will understand if you have to return here, I’m sure. But I want you to remember that many of us have lost a parent. It was what led us to be recruited in the first place. The king needed sorcerers for cheap, people without lives that will take them away from the castle. If you must leave, everyone will understand so long as it’s for the betterment of all of Lycast. If not, I can’t speak for others, but I know how I would feel.”
She wiped what seemed to be the last tear and looked at me. “I can live with that.”
I stood up, and soon she did as well. I started toward the door, thinking we would be leaving soon. I would have to figure out what to do about Hadley later. It didn’t seem like she would be coming, though I would try to speak to her one last time before I rode out of Livea.
However, Kataleya wasn’t moving toward the door. In fact, she wasn’t moving at all.
“What is it?” I asked.
“The worst part about this is that it could’ve been stopped. We never had to let Endell in the house. That’s what makes me the angriest. I feel so stupid!” It sounded like she was about to start crying again.
“That doesn’t help anyone,” I explained. “Just remember who did this. It wasn’t you.”
I was impressed as I watched her fight down the tears, and a fiery look took hold in her eyes. “Yes,” was all she said.
Someone threw open the door. It was Kataleya’s mother, her eyes red just like her daughter’s.
“We have two visitors, Kataleya,” she said in an all-business tone. “Trevor is one. I expect you will be your best self you can be right now as you greet him.”
“I will try, Mother. Who is the other guest?”
“A young woman who has not given her name. She looks like she’s been on the road for a while.”
I started toward the doorway. “That must be the witch.”
“What?” Mora said, not moving out of my way.
“She won’t be staying long,” I reassured her. “Just after something to eat and possibly a bath.” I figured she needed both, having been on the run for so long. “Could you have the cook muster up something for us for breakfast?”
I wasn’t sure if Mora still blamed me for the death of her husband, and if Kataleya had given an insincere apology on her behalf. Considering how she glanced at Kataleya in that moment, perhaps she was still wondering herself.
“Lady,” I said, taking her gaze back. “I was hurt from the things you and Kataleya claimed yesterday. Kataleya can confirm that I would do anything to win this war, and I know Whitley was helping us. I would never let him die if I could help it, but I will admit that I prioritized Kataleya over him. When I thought she might perish, I did leave Whitley. Until that moment, however, I was doing everything I could for him. If you think of that choice as a mistake, then I will not argue against it, but that is the choice I would’ve made every time.”
I was surprised when Mora started to cry. I reminded myself that this was still new to them, the loss of their family member. Perhaps I shouldn’t speak so callously. It was just difficult not to when I myself was still so angry about the whole ordeal.
Kataleya was absolutely right. This could’ve been avoided.
Kataleya embraced her mother. “Jon would do anything for victory, like he says.” She spoke gently. “He would never let Father die if it could be helped.”
Mora quickly stopped her crying and apologized to me.
“I’m sorry,” she told me again after wiping her eyes. “Nothing of what happened was your fault. It was wrong of me to say so.”
“I forgive you,” I said.
Mora seemed to be stifling more tears, but she quickly composed herself. “Breakfast and baths are already prepared. Just find any servant and let them know you wish to eat or bathe, and they will see to it.”
“Thank you.”
First, however, I was going to finally meet this witch. I sorely wanted to trust her, so much so that I was ready to excuse any past crimes. We needed a witch. Hell, we needed any kind of sorcerer.
However, I told myself to be cautious with her. Remi had vouched for her, but I couldn’t be sure Remi had gotten to know her very well. It wasn’t as if Remi had gotten very close with any of us. I imagined it could be the same with Hadley.
Kataleya hurried down first as if to distance herself from me. I had a sense she wouldn’t want Trevor to know she had spent very much time with me during my stay, and I understood. Even if she was to refuse his proposal, as I expected after everything that had happened, Kataleya was someone who tried to avoid conflict unless necessary. I tried to as well…sometimes.
It was for this reason that I would be polite to Hadley. Kataleya and her mother headed off to a different section of the mansion as I waited in the dining room for the servants to bring Hadley in for me, as well as our breakfast.
Eventually they came in with her. I felt like I had seen her before, that we were even familiar with each other. She had long, black hair. It was thick and covered her shoulders. Dirt seemed to be caked into her skin and clothes from head to toe. Her trousers were loose, baggy, as if they had belonged to someone bigger.
She had probably stolen them.
She wore a loose coat held together with a few buttons. I didn’t know what had happened to her original clothing. She hadn’t been on the run for more than a month, but that could be a long time for someone who was not well-prepared. Or perhaps she was like Remi and just dressed in loose clothing by choice, and this was what she had on when she fled her home.
The longer I looked at her doll-like face, the more I realized that it was the one I had seen in the dream where we’d first communicated. So I really had seen her before now. I almost couldn’t believe it was possible.
I swallowed a lump in my throat as I remembered the feeling she’d evoked from me, the same feeling clutching at my heart now. It wasn’t that she was very beautiful right now—she looked like a cute girl who was in over her head—so I figured it might be part of some spell or trick with mana.
She had a sweet, round face, with large eyes, pouty lips, and the kinds of cheeks grandmas were known to squeeze. Her eyes and eyebrows were dark, like her hair. I never would’ve guessed she was a witch capable of harm.
I gestured at the seat across from me. Her gaze never left me as she cautiously climbed in and sat down, but not before she set her dirty bag next to her chair. I had no idea what she was thinking as she looked at me. She didn’t say a word.
The servants brought in our breakfast, porridge and bread, with a dark juice to sip on.
I hadn’t slept very well. I was a bit tired and very hungry. I expected her to say something soon, at least ask a question, but she simply stared.
I took a spoonful of the porridge and held it up to my mouth. She did the same as she continued to watch me.
It was too hot, so I blew on it. I heard her do the same.
Her eyes still never left me.
I took a bite of the porridge. She did the same.
Then she seemed to forget all about me, looking down at her porridge as if noticing it for the first time. A small smile found its way onto her lips.
She ate quicker and quicker, no doubt burning her mouth as she used her hand to fan her open mouth here and there, but she didn’t seem to mind. She went straight for the bread as soon as she was done with the porridge.
I watched her consume all of it, her gaze never meeting mine again. Then she chugged down the juice.
Finally, when she was done, she looked at me.
I had thought of my first question by then. “Can I see your papers?�
��
She reached into her bag and pulled out some wrinkly parchments. She seemed hesitant as she held her hand back while I reached out.
“You’re going to have to trust me,” I said. “Unless you want to spend the rest of your life running.”
She sighed, then handed her papers to me.
The first thing I noticed was that the seal at the bottom was not a symbol I had seen on anyone’s papers before. It was an “R” of fancy calligraphy. It took me a moment to realize what it meant.
“You’re from Rohaer?” I asked.
She nodded.
It wasn’t that she looked nervous as much as it seemed that she was holding in, well, possibly everything.
Like most identification papers, there wasn’t much on them. They just listed her name, the year she was born, her place of birth, and the names of her parents.
Hadley Eshell. She was eighteen years old, a little younger than me given the month of her birthday.
I wondered if she was capable of killing me in my sleep. She didn’t look like it. Comparing her to Endell, I had no fears about this girl. I knew that was wrong, however. Just because she was desperate to stop running didn’t mean she would cooperate. There were many people who valued safety above all else. If she thought I was leading her to her death, she would escape at any cost.
With Kataleya coming with us, though, I wouldn’t have to be as vigilant. It should be easy to get Hadley back to the castle. It was just a one-day trip if we rode hard. Then I could let the king decide what to do about her. I usually trusted the decisions he made.
“What do you want from us?” I asked Hadley.
“By ‘us,’ do you mean sorcerers of the king?”
“Yes.”
She scrunched her mouth. “My things back, to start with.”
I had her bag next to mine, beside my chair. She eyed it.
I put it on my lap to give her a better view. “These are ingredients for curses, right?”
She had an unamused expression. “You said you want my help.” It was posed like a question.
“I do.”
“And you know I’m a witch.”