Horace & Bunwinkle

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Horace & Bunwinkle Page 6

by PJ Gardner


  “Perhaps,” Bunwinkle cut in, “she’s a big jerk and likes to hide animals away for the fun of it.” Her eyes lit up. “Hey, I bet we could track her. I’m gonna do that right now.” She put her snout to the ground and started sniffing.

  Horace and the princess watched as Bunwinkle sniffed her way into the tall grass behind the barn.

  Sofaneesba was quiet for a moment before she asked, “Were they all pets from this neighborhood?”

  “Yes,” Horace answered.

  “Do you know if they’ve been hurt?”

  He shook his head slowly.

  “I don’t believe Smokey would do something like that. At least I hope she wouldn’t. But if she did, I might have an idea where she took them. I need to check something first. I’ll meet you here tomorrow morning to share what I find.”

  “Be careful. Don’t take any unnecessary chances,” Horace said, and was rewarded with a gracious smile from the princess as she took her leave.

  As soon as the cat rounded the corner of the barn, Bunwinkle emerged from the grass and announced, “Nothing in there.” She looked around. “Aw, I didn’t get to say goodbye to Princess Sopapilla.”

  “She’s going to investigate something for us.”

  Bunwinkle nodded. “So, hey, I was thinking while I was in the grass, and you know what, I’m totally gonna grow a mustache.”

  Horace tilted his head. Was that even possible?

  They woke bright and early the next morning so they could go down to the pond and wait for the princess. In truth, neither of them had slept well. Horace had worried that something would happen to their new friend, and Bunwinkle had checked her reflection every ten minutes to see if her mustache had grown in yet.

  Horace circled the pond while Bunwinkle searched the underbrush on the far side. She returned with something in her mouth.

  “What is that?” he asked, against his better judgment.

  “I don no, bu iss sicky.”

  He closed his eyes. “Bunwinkle, you can’t just put things in your mouth! Did you sniff it first? Test it with your tongue in case it’s poisonous? There’s a process you have to go through before you chew on something.”

  She shrugged and swallowed. “No worries, I’m totally fine.”

  What was he going to do? She clearly had no sense of self-preservation. He’d simply have to watch over her constantly.

  They waited a long time for Princess Sofaneesba, and the longer they waited, the more concerned they became.

  “Do you think something happened?” Bunwinkle asked.

  Horace looked up from his legs. “I don’t know.”

  He didn’t want to alarm the piglet, but he had a heavy feeling in his chest that said something was wrong. Please let Sofaneesba be safe.

  “Let’s check her house. Maybe she’s sick or she started a really good movie or something.”

  Before they could leave, Smokey stepped out of the shrubs, looking more ragged than ever. “You seen Princess What’s-Her-Face?” she asked.

  Bunwinkle glared at her. “Did you do something to her?”

  A deep, wheezy laugh was the only reply.

  Horace moved up beside Bunwinkle. “Did you harm her?” he asked.

  The gray cat narrowed her eyes at them. “I didn’t touch her. Besides, I’m looking for her too. She promised me some food.”

  “I don’t believe you!” Bunwinkle shouted. “What did you do to her?”

  Smokey hissed at her. “Nothing compared to what I’m going to do to you.”

  The cat jumped at Bunwinkle. Horace threw his body between them, so instead of Smokey’s claw colliding with Bunwinkle’s tender belly, it caught Horace in the neck.

  Blood dripped onto the ground. He spun around. That was it! He was through with this feline menace. He growled from deep inside his chest, and Smokey hissed back. He kept his eyes on hers, ready for her next attack. Then he heard the quacking.

  Blast it! Those rotten birds were back.

  “Horace, look out!”

  6

  Dr. Schwink

  What a fight! Winkie had never seen anything like it. Horace never backed down, even after Smokey scratched his neck. He growled, and the gray furball launched herself at him. He ducked, and she flew over his back, right into the pond. It was awesome!

  Smokey yowled and screeched, then scrambled out of the water.

  “I’ll get you for this!” she shouted.

  “Like you got all those other animals? We know you did it, Smokey!” Winkie yelled back.

  She turned to Horace and her excitement died. His peaches had lost their pink, and his eyes were scrunched together.

  “We need to find Ellie,” she said.

  Horace nodded, then winced as blood oozed out of the scratches on his neck.

  Winkie’s stomach flip-flopped. They had to find their human quick, before Horace passed out or Winkie threw up.

  They found her feeding the chicks with the Hogland twins. She hurried out of the coop as soon as she saw them.

  “Oh, baby boy, what happened?” She dropped to her knees and checked Horace’s wounds.

  He whimpered when she touched his neck. Winkie pressed her side to his, wishing she could help.

  “Is he okay?” the freckled twin asked, her eyes as big as plates.

  “I’m sorry, girls, we’re not going to be able to feed the chicks together today. I’ve got to get Horace to the vet.”

  The girls left the coop with identical worried faces. “Can we help?”

  Ellie shook her head. “I don’t think so. You should probably head home.”

  They clasped hands and nodded.

  As they walked away, Ellie turned to Winkie. “What about you? Are you okay?” She gently ran her hands over Winkie’s body. When she was done, she sighed. “Thank heavens.”

  After that, Ellie went into super-speedy mode. She ran into the house and came back with her purse and a dish towel. She bandaged Horace’s neck and rushed him to the car. Winkie chased after her. No way was she staying home. Horace needed her.

  The vets’ office was busy when they walked in. The waiting room was packed. Humans sat in every seat, and animals sprawled all over the floor.

  They checked in and then sat down to wait. Ellie held Horace the whole time. He kept his eyes closed and his body curled up tight in her arms. There was nothing for Winkie to do except worry. And chew on the leg of the chair.

  What if something happened to Horace? Sure, he was snooty and a know-it-all, but he always took care of her. He’d even apologized after he’d chased the birds. She glanced over at him shaking in Ellie’s arms.

  Please let him be all right.

  She moved closer and pressed her cheek to his. That’s when she noticed the announcement board. The ads were all gone. Now it was completely covered in missing-animal posters. The old posters were still there, but four more had been added, including one for a goat. As she read over the new flyers, a woman walked in.

  “My cat’s gone missing. I checked with animal control and they haven’t seen her, but they thought you might have. She’s white and has a dark gray mustache.”

  Winkie whipped her head around to see if Horace had heard. His eyes were open and focused on the lady at the counter.

  “I’m sorry—we haven’t seen any cats like that. You’re welcome to put a flyer on our board, and I’ll let everyone here know to keep a lookout for her.”

  “Thank you.” The woman’s voice was soft and high, like the princess’s.

  At the door, the woman took off her glasses and wiped her eyes.

  So the princess really was missing. No matter what that rotten Smokey said, Winkie knew she had something to do with it.

  “We’ve got to stop Smokey,” Horace growled. “She’s out of control.”

  “Horace?” the tech called out. “Dr. Schwink will see you now.”

  Their exam room was at the far end of the building. And it was freezing. Winkie started shivering as soon as the tech opened the
door.

  “Sorry about the room. We don’t use it for examinations very often,” the tech said. “You usually see Dr. Schott, but he’s got his hands full with a bulldog at the moment, and we wanted to get you in right away.”

  Ellie set Horace down on the counter so the tech could check him out.

  “These don’t look too bad to me, but Dr. Schwink still needs to check them.” She picked up her tablet, typed a few things, and then left.

  Winkie moved next to Ellie to keep warm, but she didn’t stay there long. What was she doing sitting there when Princess Soap Opera was in danger?

  “It’ll be all right,” Horace said softly. “We’ll find her.”

  He was right. It was like the Case of the Missing Keys—they would find her, because no one else could.

  She leaned against Ellie’s leg again and waited for the vet to come. When the door finally opened, a tall, bald man walked in.

  “Meine Güte! It’s bitter in dis room.” He fiddled with something on the wall, and the cold air stopped blowing. “Dat should help, but also I vill leave de door open a bit. I don’t tink we have to worry about dese little pets running avay.”

  He held out his hand to Ellie. “I’m Dr. Schvink. I understand your little doggie got in a fight vith a kitty cat. Is dat so?”

  Ellie nodded.

  He typed something on his tablet, then peeked at Horace over the top of it and wrote some more.

  This guy was just as big a weirdo as Dr. Shot.

  Dr. Schwink finally finished making notes. “Good. Now I make my exam.” He washed his hands, twice, then put on a pair of gloves. “You vill be a good boy, ja?”

  Winkie moved to the other side of the room before he could peel back the towel. She did not want to see it again. Just thinking about the blood made her stomach flip-flop.

  “Not the tail! Not the tail!”

  Winkie’s head snapped around. “Horace?”

  It wasn’t him. But he’d heard the voice too. His ears had perked up, and he had a funny expression on his face.

  Where was it coming from?

  “My tail!” the voice cried out again.

  It got louder as Winkie moved closer to the open door. Maybe she should check it out. She looked over her shoulder. The humans weren’t paying her any attention. She could sneak out and be back before they knew she was gone.

  But it didn’t feel right to leave Horace.

  “Why? Why?”

  Winkie’s eyes met Horace’s. She jerked her head toward the door. He nodded and whispered, “Pet-tectives investigate.”

  Winkie stood up tall. Time to be brave like her brother.

  She gulped, then forced herself to follow the sound of crying. It led her down a dark hallway. Winkie didn’t have great eyesight, but she could smell a potato chip from a mile away and she could hear the can opener from the pond. So even though she couldn’t see her hoof in front of her snout, she knew she was close to a whole bunch of animals.

  Very close. She pressed her ear to the door next to her.

  “My tail.”

  “My eye.”

  “Nobody knows the troubles I’ve seen.”

  Yeah, this was definitely the place. Winkie look at the sign on the wall. It read RECOVERY.

  She pushed on the door with her hoof, and it swung open to show a large room filled with suitcases. The door swung shut before she could get a better look.

  Suitcases? That couldn’t be right.

  She hit the door again and raced into the room. As the door shut, the lights dimmed.

  Great.

  “My eye!” The shout came from the suitcase right in front of her.

  Winkie’s whole body started shaking. This had been a bad idea. Maybe she should go back to Horace and Ellie.

  She turned back to the door, then stopped. Wait, what would Suey do? Would she run back to Andie when she got scared? No, she would investigate, and that’s what Winkie would do too.

  Winkie crept closer to the suitcase to get a better look.

  It wasn’t a suitcase. It was a kennel. On the side was a heart-shaped sticker that read BE GENTLE WITH ME, I HAVE MEOWIES. She peeked into a cutout on the side. A cat paced back and forth, muttering something she couldn’t quite understand. Then, without warning, he turned and looked at her with his one eye.

  Where his other eye should have been there was a huge bandage.

  “They took my eye. Couldn’t see much out of it anymore and it oozed green goop, but it was still my eye.”

  Green goop? Agh.

  “Who took your eye?”

  But the cat wasn’t paying attention to her. He was too busy shredding the bandage covering the right half of his face. No way was she gonna hang out to see what was underneath. Winkie scurried away to the next kennel. There was a happy-face sticker on this one: DON’T TAKE MEOWT. I’M NOT WELL YET.

  The cat inside was passed out on her side, drool dribbling out of her mouth. Her leg was in a splint.

  Winkie moved on to the next and the next. Most of the animals were asleep. The few that weren’t stared at her with glazed eyes. All of them had bandages or braces. Someone had operated on them.

  She shivered. This place gave her the heebie-jeebies. And the little stickers with their cheery sayings only made it creepier.

  At the end of the first row she found the one who’d led her there. A black cat sat staring at a bandaged stub on her rear end.

  “My tail, my beautiful tail.” She turned her head and caught sight of Winkie. “Look what they did to me.”

  Winkie moved closer. “What happened?”

  The cat sighed dramatically. “It was terrible. I’d followed my human into the room where she cleans herself and uses the human litter box. I wanted to stare at my beautiful face in the mirror. But my human wouldn’t allow it. She closed the door to keep me out. Pain shot through my tail and straight up my back. Everything is a blur after that. I don’t even know how I got here.”

  Winkie’s heart beat faster. Boy, she needed to chew on something in the worst way.

  “What am I to do? How will I keep my balance? How will I express the full range of my emotions?” The cat put her head in her paws and sobbed.

  “Can I ask you one question?”

  She lifted her head. “It’s midnight.”

  “What?”

  “You wanted to know the name of this tragic creature you see before you. Well, it’s Midnight.”

  Winkie rolled her eyes. What a drama queen!

  “Midnight. Got it. So, Midnight, who removed your tail?”

  The sobbing started up again. “Those monsters in the white coats.”

  Aha! Smokey wasn’t behind the petnappings. It was these no-good, shot-giving, weird-sounding fiends. And Winkie was going to stop them.

  “Hey. Hey, piggy.”

  The deep voice came from a kennel closer to the door. It belonged to a yellow Lab. His kennel was bigger than the others, giving the big dog room to stretch his legs out, which was good since he had splints on two of them.

  “Hi, I’m Winkie.”

  “Name’s Samuel Adams.”

  “Samuel Adams? Hey, is your human John Adams?”

  The dog tilted his head, his forehead wrinkled. “No, Trevor is my human.”

  “Oh.” Winkie stared at the hip-to-paw casts on Sam’s hind legs. “What happened to you?”

  “No idea. One minute I was playing, and the next minute I was rolling on the ground in pain. Next thing I knew, I was here.”

  “That’s terrible.”

  He nodded. “Yeah. I mean, Trev and I were on our way to becoming the top frizball team in the state! You’ve heard of frizball, right?”

  She shook her head.

  “It’s the number one canine-human competitive field sport.”

  Winkie stared at him. None of that meant anything to her.

  He shrugged. “It’s kind of a big deal.”

  “If you say so.”

  They stared at each other for a moment. T
hen Winkie asked, “Do you have any idea what’s going on here?”

  Sam shook his head. “Not really. But it’s not a safe place, that’s for sure. Animals come and go at all hours, and we never see them again. Body parts disappear. Look at that cat you were just talking to.”

  They both looked over at Midnight, who kept staring at what was left of her tail.

  “Who knows what these doctors are up to? I don’t trust them one bit. And neither should you. You need to get out of here before they come back.”

  Winkie’s tummy flip-flopped. “Thank you, Samuel Adams.” She turned and ran for the door. What would those evil vets do to her if they caught her in there? She smacked the door with her hoof, and there stood Kissy Face Lady. She narrowed her eyes at Winkie.

  “What are you doing in here?” All trace of the fun, friendly lady from earlier had disappeared. She came toward Winkie, a mean look in her eyes.

  Uh-oh. The tech was in on it.

  Winkie took off, diving between the lady’s legs and escaping through the door before it closed.

  Angry Face Lady chased her down the hall and into the exam room.

  Dr. Schwink was washing his hands at the sink as Ellie cradled Horace in her arms when Winkie burst into the room, the tech right on her tail.

  “You’ll never believe where I found this one.” She grabbed for Winkie.

  “Hey, be careful!” Ellie snapped.

  “Your pig was in the postsurgery center. We try to keep it sterile to minimize the risk of infection. Now I’ll have to go through and clean everything again.” Winkie hid behind Ellie’s leg, her body shaking.

  “I’m so sorry. We’re all a little out of sorts because of this.”

  Dr. Schwink stepped forward. He stared down at Winkie with cold eyes. “You have been a naughty girl. If you vere my piggy, I’d keep you on a leash so you’d never get avay from me.”

  Oh no. She had to get out of there. Winkie’s body tensed.

  “Okay.” Ellie jumped in. “Well, we’re leaving now, so you won’t have to worry about us anymore.”

  She picked up Horace and nodded her head at Winkie. “You stay with me, do you hear?”

 

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