The seconds ticked past one-by-one until I almost started biting my nails. Might as well make them match the chipped polish on my toes. I stood to start cleaning the kitchen, anything to pass the time and keep me out of my own head. Then Jayce appeared at the end of the staircase with something clenched in his fist.
“Hold out your arm,” he told me once he got close enough.
“Are you going to shock me with something?”
Jayce heaved a long breath and held his gaze steady. “Could you just trust me?” His voice was calm. Determined.
The thing was, I did trust him. Even after all the reasons I’d told myself over the years that I shouldn’t. After all the pain and the heartbreak. I trusted him. Completely.
I extended my arm to him and he wrapped his fingers around my wrist. His skin was smooth and cool against mine. My pulse pounded against his thumb, and an anxious current raced through my veins.
He moved his hand—like there was a fire burning between us, and he felt it too. Then he took the object from his clenched fist and wrapped it around my wrist.
“A bracelet?”
Jayce took a deep, unsteady breath and stepped back. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and leaned against the stair rail. “Do you remember the field behind the playground? The one with all the clover flowers?”
Of course I remembered. That’s where he made his promise, the one he broke when he left.
Sometimes at recess, we’d walked to the back of the playground and sat by the trees. I picked the little white flowers, tying the stems together to make bracelets for Avery and me. Jayce read books. Some days, he would tell me about what he read, and I’d tell him about what happened on The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Some days we just made fun of Mr. Langston. But one day, a day forever burned into my memory and etched in my heart, something changed. One day Jayce reached over and grabbed the flowers from my fingers. For a second, I’d thought he was gonna try to hold my hand. He started twisting the stems together until he made a little flower ring. He reached over and grabbed my hand, and my stomach flopped. I’d started to pull my hand away, but he stopped me. He smiled and slid the flower ring on the fourth finger of my left hand.
“So, does this mean I’m your girlfriend now?”
“This means you’re my girlfriend always.”
“Promise?” I’d asked, giving him the death stare.
“Promise.”
Pain squeezed at my heart as memory after memory tore through my mind. I didn’t even notice that Jayce had moved. He stood right in front of me, reaching for my hand.
“Look at the bracelet, Claire,” he said. His voice was firm, yet gentle.
I looked at my wrist and swallowed the sob that rose in my throat. Jayce took my hand in his and lifted it between us.
Tiny flowers. Clovers. Tied together and covered in a coat of silver.
“You made this? For me?”
“Yes.” His voice was barely above a whisper now. He cleared his throat and met my eyes. “Everything I’ve ever done has been for you.”
“So, your company, it makes flower jewelry?”
He breathed a quiet chuckle. “It started off that way, yes. It’s a little bit bigger now, but… Yeah. That bracelet is the first piece of jewelry I ever made. I carry it with me to remind me of where I started. Of why I started.” Jayce ran his thumb across the front of my hand. “Everything I have… everything I am… began in a field behind a playground in the back of an elementary school. With you.”
None of it made sense. I wanted to believe him. I wanted to soak up every word and let it live in my heart forever. But he left. Without as much as a proper goodbye. A note and a clover bracelet. Those were the weapons he used to break his promise. He fucking left. How was that for me? It was too much. I couldn’t process it all. So I did what I did best.
I ran.
Straight out the front door, off the porch, and onto the sidewalk, where I stopped still. A flash of lightning tore across the sky followed by a peal of thunder. The smell of rain lingered in the air, but I didn’t care.
My breath was ragged. I threw my head back and let my eyes fall closed in defeat. I repeated his words in my mind. “Everything I’ve ever done has been for you.” The silver bracelet felt heavy on my wrist. Then, the first raindrop fell. Followed by another flash of lightning so bright that I could see it with my eyes closed.
“Claire, come inside. We need to talk about this. About us,” Jayce said, startling my eyes open.
He was close. So close. The rain fell harder now. Tiny droplets turned into a heavy curtain drumming against the roof of the B&B, but neither of us moved. There was a silent sadness in his face when I looked at him. He moved closer. My heart pounded. I felt his hand reach out and brush a strand of wet hair from my face.
He brought his other hand to cradle my cheek and every ounce of my resolve washed away with the summer rain. He lifted my chin with a fingertip and his breath whispered across my face. His eyes were so dark, so serious. We stood like that letting the rain fall over our bodies and breathing each other in. The tip of his nose grazed mine. I wanted to stay like this forever. Raindrops clung to our skin, but we didn’t care. It was just us, Claire and Jayce, like it used to be. My chest heaved in anticipation. All I could think about, all I wanted to do, was taste him. I pressed up on my tiptoes and softly kissed the corner of his mouth. His lips were so soft, so full, better than I remembered. He closed his eyes and a deep groan rumbled in the back of his throat. I swear it was the sexiest sound I’d ever heard. He brushed his lips across mine, gently at first. Then he parted them and pulled me into a kiss. I drank in the tenderness of the moment, memorized every second of it. His hand fell to the small of my back then down to my ass. His other hand gripped my thigh, sliding my dress up as his fingers dug into my flesh when he lifted my leg to his waist.
He raised his mouth from mine and held my gaze. His erection dug deep into my stomach when he pressed my body against his. “See what you do to me? What you’ve always done to me?”
I wanted all of this. All of him. His soft lips. His skillful tongue. His hands. I wanted all of him over all of me. “Yes,” I breathed against his lips.
Jayce lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He carried me inside where the cool air hit my wet skin and made me shiver. He never moved his eyes from mine as he walked through the front room to the staircase. His wet shoes lost their grip on the wooden stairs. It happened in slow motion. My butt landed on the hard step with a thump. That’s gonna leave a bruise. Jayce grabbed the stair rail with one hand and held onto me with the other. I squealed. He cursed through clenched teeth.
Then he brought his finger to my lips and leaned his forehead against mine. “Sssshh,” he whispered.
His body settled between my legs. His still hard cock rubbed delicious friction against my aching core. My body didn’t care that we were on a staircase in the middle of a nosy old woman’s bed-and-breakfast. It wanted him. Now.
It turned out my brain was a serious prude dead set against letting us take this any further.
“We should get out of these clothes,” I told him.
A devilish grin spread across his face. “I was thinking the exact same thing.”
I smacked his chest. “So we don’t get sick.”
“Not where I was going with it, but okay.” He chuckled as he stood. Then he held out a hand to help me up.
When we got to my room, Jayce headed straight into the bathroom to grab two towels. I could hardly hear myself think over the sound of my teeth chattering.
He wrapped one of the towels around my shoulders and pulled it tight. “Better?” he asked.
I settled into the warm cotton and smiled. “Getting there.”
“You know what they say about body heat…”
Yes. Rub two naked bodies together and you’ll start a fire that Niagara Falls couldn’t put out.
“No, but I’m sure you’ll tell me.”
Ja
yce pulled the wet T-shirt over his head and tossed it aside. The soaked fabric hit the wood floor with a thud. “How ‘bout I show you instead?”
God, this man. Every inch of him was perfection. Every line. Every plane. Every dip and curve. And that smile… That smile was a recipe for heartache.
This couldn’t happen. I had to stop it before we did something we’d both regret. We’d already taken it way too far. It would’ve been so easy to get lost in him. But I couldn’t lose myself by finding Jayce. Not again. He’d built a life away from me. We’d have our moment, then he’d go back to that life, and I would go back to...To what? A job I didn’t love and a house that reminded me of a man who didn’t love me. The goodbye was inevitable. And I wouldn’t survive it a second time. I was still picking up the pieces from the first.
“Jayce.” I looked at him and his smile disappeared. “We can’t do this.”
“No, you can’t do this.” He took a step forward then cradled my face in his hands. “Me? I’ve been waiting thirteen years for this. You are a craving that will never be satisfied. No matter where I go or what I do. It’s always you.” He brought his mouth to mine. “There are days when all I swear all I can think about is the way you taste.”
I fought back tears as I breathed him in. “Jayce, don’t.”
He ran his tongue along the seam of my lips. “Let me taste you again.”
It took every ounce of strength I’d spent most of my life building up, but I pulled myself away from him. I ran my thumb across the bracelet on my wrist. You can do this, Claire. You have to. “You should go. We both know how good you are at leaving. The only difference is, this time, I’m leaving too.”
I didn’t want to say it. I hated reliving it as much as he did. But I had to hit him where it hurt. Otherwise, we’d both cave. I had to remind him that Clover Creek was nothing more than a memory we shared. It wasn’t our future. Not anymore.
He jolted back as though someone had shot him. Right in the heart. “I guess I deserved that.”
I pulled the towel closer to my body as some sort of shield. As though covering the outside would protect me from the feelings inside.
Jayce raked his fingers through his damp hair. The muscles in his stomach flexed with his heavy breaths. I clenched my fists in the towel to keep myself from touching him. God, I wanted to touch him.
A frustrated breath left his lips. “I want this, Claire. I want you. And you can threaten me all you want. It doesn’t matter where you go or how far apart we are. I don’t want anyone else. And I don’t want anyone else to have you. Or taste your lips. Or touch your skin. Or feel the warmth of being inside of you. I don’t care how fucked up we are. This... Us… no amount of time or distance can stop this from happening.” His hands fell to his sides and his eyes locked mine in a pain-filled gaze. “It’s as simple… and as complicated… as that.”
He sounded so sure of himself, so sure of us.
I just wished it could be that easy.
I wiped a bead of sweat from my brow. The Texas sun was already beating down on me and it wasn’t even ten o’clock in the morning yet. I’d finished repairing the broken fence yesterday. All that was left to do was paint. This handyman thing wasn’t so bad. Fixing white picket fences was a nice change of scenery from looking out of the window of a high-rise condo every day and night.
I knew Claire was here. I saw her gram’s car parked in the driveway. I wanted to talk to her, even though I had no idea what to expect from her after last night. She asked me to leave, so I did, but not before owning her sweet fucking mouth one more time. Being with her like that was everything I’d thought it would be and more than I remembered it ever being before. The forgiveness I’d hoped for was right there on her soft lips. Why would she run from that? I still had so much to tell her, so much to explain. I just hoped she wouldn’t hate me when I did.
I pulled a bottle of water from the ice chest I’d picked up on the way to her Gram’s this morning. Tiny droplets of cold water fell on my chest when I gulped it down. I was about to dip my brush in the bucket of paint when I spotted Claire coming down the driveway. Her bare feet and tan legs got my dick hard. Even in tiny striped shorts and a simple T-shirt, she was beautiful.
“Does this mean it’s a no on the sprinklers today?” She nodded her head toward the plastic cooler.
“I don’t know. Are you offering to run through them with me?”
She laughed, and it lit up her whole face. “Oh, I’ve felt what water does to you. I’m not sure it’s safe. The neighbors might see.” She gasped and brought her hand to her chest. “Or worse. My mother could show up again.”
She was right. The neighbors… or her mother, didn’t want to witness the filthy things I wanted to do to her. “Baby, I’d fuck you right here and let the neighbors take notes. Your mother too, if she didn’t pass out first.” I threw her a wink. “And FYI, it wasn’t the rain that made me kiss you last night.”
A rosy blush colored her cheeks, and she parted her lips as if she were remembering the way it had felt—the way I felt. “No?”
I shook my head and held her gaze. “No.” I took a step forward. Maybe if I was lucky, she’d let me kiss her again.
A loud crash sounded inside the house. Claire bolted toward the front door. I ran in behind her.
“Gram!” Claire yelled as soon as she threw open the door.
I followed Claire into the kitchen where we were met with more crashing and language more colorful than any proper Southern woman should ever spew. Pots and pans were scattered across the white ceramic tile and cooking utensils strewn on top of the black granite countertops. Every cabinet door was open, and Claire’s gram had started rummaging through a stack of canned goods, looking at one then tossing it to the floor.
“Gram,” Claire said as she placed a hand on each one of her gram’s shoulders. “You seem worried. Can I help you find something?”
Justine Cunningham immediately calmed at the sound of Claire’s voice. I knew the feeling. It had the same effect on me. She turned, and Claire wrapped her in a hug. The older woman’s eyes were glazed with tears.
“It’s okay, Gram. We’ll find it. Just tell me what you’re looking for,” Claire coaxed.
I probably should have left, but I couldn’t stop watching. Claire was so patient, so calm. It was remarkable. Even though I knew on the inside her mind must have been reeling. Mine sure was. Justine Cunningham had always been the voice of reason. She’d never raised her voice. She’d never lost her temper. She’d always had a smile, and she’d certainly never used the words I’d heard coming out of her mouth now.
“My sewing kit. The one your gramps bought me. It’s not in here. I know I left it right here.” Gram’s voice was frantic. Her shoulders started to shake but Claire just pulled her closer.
“I thought you kept that in the bathroom, Gram, but we’ll keep looking. Okay? Jayce and I will help you.” She shot me a look, and I nodded in response.
I wasn’t sure what to do or how much help I would be. Memories of a time I’d rather forget threatened to surface, but I shoved them to the back of my mind. I’d deal with them later. I’d have to if this thing with Claire was ever going to work.
Claire draped her arm around her gram’s shoulder and led her through the maze of scattered cookware and into the living room. “Here. Why don’t you sit and relax while we check the bathroom?” She guided her gram to the chair by the fireplace and pulled a blue and white blanket across her lap.
Gram ran her hand over the top of the blanket and began to sob. “It’s ruined!” she shouted. “The blanket is ruined, and I don’t have my sewing kit.” She threw the blanket off her legs and her shoulders started to shake again.
I saw the panic flash in Claire’s eyes. If she felt anything like I did, she had no idea what to do. But she stayed calm. The panic quickly disappeared, and as if she knew exactly what to do, she grabbed a quilt from the back of the couch and laid it on her gram’s lap.
“It’
s not ruined. We’ll fix it. Okay?”
Gram exhaled a deep breath and nodded. I took it all in, speechless. Claire was an angel. Sent straight from heaven. She took the blanket from the floor. Then she placed a light kiss on her gram’s cheek and brushed a stray hair from her forehead.
Claire folded the blanket across her arm and walked over to where I stood. She stopped in front of me with tears welled up in her eyes.
“I lied,” she said. Her voice cracked, and it broke my heart. I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear what came next. “When I said I was leaving.” My heart started beating again when Claire continued. “I’m not. I can’t. I have to stay.”
Day after day, I stood at the head of a boardroom and led a worldwide company to success. I’d attended conferences and seminars all around the globe. But I’d never witnessed strength and control like I had in that moment.
Love didn’t even begin to describe what I felt for Claire Cunningham.
Nothing could have prepared me for what just happened. No amount of research or reading could have ever told me what I would feel when I witnessed someone I loved fall to pieces in front of my eyes. My whole world shattered then came back together. Like I was watching my life through a blurry lens that suddenly came into focus.
Gram was fine the day before. We’d danced and made snacks in the kitchen. We talked and laughed. Then one day later, Gram was lost. Broken. Afraid. One day. It all changed in one day. I couldn’t imagine what a difference of months would make. Or years, even.
How was I supposed to leave knowing my gram was like this? Who would take care of her? Surely my parents didn’t expect Annie to do it? Gram thought she was the housekeeper for fuck’s sake. Something had to give. I had to stay. I wanted to stay.
Jayce waited patiently in the doorway as I collected my thoughts. I couldn’t let Gram see me upset. That was the last thing she needed. We couldn’t both be a hot mess. One of us had to keep it together.
“She needs her sewing kit,” I said as I headed toward the staircase.
Sterling Page 8