by Jontu'
“Yup, Jae, you right. Let me leave. I ain’t got to get a babysitter to go have a good time. I ain’t even got no kids,” he said as he got up and grabbed his hoodie and walked out the door.
“And yo ass never will have any with me, bitch!” I yelled after his disrespectful ass. I was sick and tired of his little slick comments regarding my child. Enough was enough and I was ready to cut ties with his mark ass. “Say bye-bye, loser. Wave at him, Tony,” I said to my son.
I heard my phone ringing but I couldn’t find it. I looked under the couch and didn’t see it. I kept searching and still couldn’t find it. I looked at Baby Tone and he was sitting on the floor giggling. “Where’s mommy phone at, silly boy?” I asked while picking him up and tickling him. I heard my phone beep, alerting me that I had a message and when I turned him around, I found it in his back pocket. This little boy was something else. He was quick to grab something and shove it in his pockets or in his pants. I laughed as I sat him down on my lap and then opened up my messages.
Loren: Umm… ‘scuse me chick open the door
Me: Sorry hun here I come
I had met this chick at school and she was real cool. I didn’t too much click with outside bitches but we had a couple classes together and she was real cool. She had invited me out one day to a fashion show that she was going to be in. I had taken Lexis and China with me and it was fun. Afterwards, we had gone out to grab some food and we really clicked.
Lo was super cute. She was black and Asian with toffee colored skin and thick, jet black hair that she mostly wore in a cute, curly fro’. Lo had a round face with a dimple in her left cheek and a cute little pug nose.
I got up and opened the door and turned around as I heard Baby Tone’s little footsteps behind me. I turned on my camera and recorded him as he walked to me, practically running and about to fall. I laughed at his little wobbly body as he lunged and grabbed on to my legs.
“Aww, shit! Look the little baby mobile now. Time to buy you a car now, huh, boo?” Loren said as she picked him up and kissed his cheek.
“Hey, hooch, what’s going on?” I asked as we walked towards the kitchen.
I had made some spaghetti for dinner and Loren had come over to bring me these shoes that I had ordered a couple of weeks ago from the designer that she worked for that had finally come in. I placed Baby Tone in his high chair and made him a bowl of spaghetti and then cut up his noodles with his spoon while Loren grabbed his sippy cup and poured him some white grape juice from out of the refrigerator. Loren was the second oldest out of eight kids so it was funny how she just tended to things automatically. After the baby was settled and beginning to feed himself, or should I say paint himself with the food, I turned around as Loren handed me the bag with the shoes in it.
“Ooooh, Lo, these are so bomb!” I squealed as I took a look at them and then opened the second box and looked at the second pair.
I had paid for Baby Tone and me to have matching shoes for his birthday. I wasn’t giving him a big party or anything but just a little get together among the family and close friends. I had decided that royal blue would be our color theme. I had a custom crown made for my prince and had bought him the cutest outfit. I had gotten him a cute ass Paul Smith color block cardigan with a white polo to go underneath and some Burberry pants to go with it. My son was about to be fly. Loren was a model for H&M’s Alexander Wang collection so she had a few connections. I had gotten her to put in a custom order and it had cost me a couple thousand but it all came together and we were going to be fly.
“Thanks, honey bunny!” I said as I hugged her and kissed her cheek. Loren held on a little longer than a normal hug so I pulled back and looked at her; she smiled and walked over to Baby Tone.
“No problem, Jae. You know you my girl and shit, you paid for it.” I didn’t know what that hug was all about but it had me kind of weirded out. “Hey, I thought Chris was staying in with you tonight?” Loren asked as she turned back towards me while feeding Baby Tone the rest of his food.
I grabbed two bowls and filled them with spaghetti before I grabbed the garlic bread out of the oven and placed a piece into each bowl. I sat the bowls down on the island and took a seat. “Lo, that nigga is dumb as fuck. He about done-done over here,” I said as I stuffed a forkful of food into my mouth. I would have made a salad for Lo but I wasn’t too fond of eating dressed up leaves with every meal, so she was going to have to deal.
“Damn, what he do now?” she asked as she pulled Antonio’s high chair close to us and sat down to eat.
“Just those little fake ass remarks, bitch ass shots he be taking towards my son. Like bitch, you how old and every time I turn around you hating on an eleven month old?” I said, getting up to grab two bottles of Snapple out the refrigerator. “Like nigga, get yo’ mothafuckin’ life, for real. I swear, Lo, the next time this nigga get slick, I’m going to leg check his ass,” I said, pointing my fork at her.
She laughed “Girl, don’t kill that nigga, just let his ass go. That fag ass nigga way too insecure to be that sexy.” We both laughed because Chris was fine as hell but his attitude made all that nice beard, sexy body and good dick irrelevant.
I liked asshole niggas but he was proving to be a bitch ass nigga. “Yeah, you right, Lo. I’m cool off blood. I’m calling his ass up in the morning and telling him I just want to chill out.”
I sat and thought about everything. Chris and I had been exclusive for about four months and at the end of the day, I wasn’t gaining anything from the relationship but some cool company when he wasn’t tripping out and some amazing sex. Lately, he had been trying to get me pregnant, insisting that we have unprotected sex, hinting around a baby and stupid shit like that. The nigga didn’t even fuck with my son; what the hell did I look like carrying his whack ass seed? I knew I wouldn’t be losing much by calling it quits with him, we had no ties and no money invested together. All he had was a few belongings over here that he could either come get or chalk.
I cleaned Baby Tone up while Loren and I talked for a little while longer before she got a phone call and said that she had to run. I thanked her for coming over to drop off the shoes then picked up my sleepy baby and walked her to the door before locking up and heading to bed.
I woke up the next morning and grabbed my phone. It was so horrible that the first things we do when we wake up is grab our phones. So I laid my phone on my chest and closed my eyes. I thanked God for waking me up this morning and said a short prayer of protection, peace and forgiveness and then picked my phone back up. I would handle my hygiene soon as I checked my notifications. I looked at the time and saw it was 9 a.m. so my son would be waking up shortly needing a diaper change and expecting breakfast. I saw that I had a few messages so I checked them first.
Chris had texted me a few times and I even had a few missed calls from him. Same old shit about he was sorry about his attitude and promised to do better. Blah, blah, blah. I was just tired of the back and forth. It was crazy that he felt like he could do and say whatever and then come over to fuck and sleep in bed after. I swear, niggas were a trip. I logged into my Instagram and saw that I had a couple of direct messages. I laughed at one that Lex had sent me clowning Jizz’s whack ass best friend. Jizz had this best friend that was always around trying to be Lex and my friend but she was whack as hell. She was from out the way and she just wasn’t our cup of tea. They had gone out last night and the bitch was looking hurt.
I came across another D.M. from some bitch I didn’t even know. Her screen name was WhoIzK but I didn’t know who it was. I looked at the picture of a sonogram with the words, “Christian Xavier Marbry Jr.” I laughed at the whole situation. I didn’t have any feeling invested in Chris so I messaged the bitch back and said, “Congrats! I hope that you and Chris make a beautiful family together. Next time bother somebody who has two fucks to give #ZeroFucksGiven.”
I placed my phone on the dresser and got my ass up. I walked into my bathroom and handled my hygiene before hea
ding downstairs to go make Baby Tone and me some eggs, grits and sausage. I thought about Chris having a baby with somebody else. Niggas weren’t worth shit these days and I didn’t have time to play games with a nigga that wasn’t even touching me financially.
I sent Chris a quick text and told him to come over for breakfast. Soon as the food was done, I ran upstairs and grabbed a duffle bag and grabbed up whatever things Chris had and threw them inside. Once I was sure I had packed up everything, I set the bag by the door in my room and went down the hall to Baby Tone’s room. As I walked in, he was just sitting up and rubbing his eyes. His face was scrunched up like he was ready to cry.
“Oh nah, Prince Tone. You are royalty, not a crybaby. You hear me?” I asked as I picked him up and felt his diaper. “Ready to eat-eat?” I asked as I changed his diaper. He stared at me, repeating my words. I smiled at my son. No matter how much money I had or what I did in life, he would always be my greatest accomplishment. I just hoped that he would be proud of me one day. That’s why I planned to finish school and build a name for myself. I had already put up a college fund for him right after he was born, so education was something he would never have to worry about.
I talked to my son as we walked downstairs to the kitchen. Soon as we hit the last step, the doorbell rang. “That was fast,” I said, surprised that Chris had gotten here so fast. I opened the door and Chris looked as if he had just woken up. I frowned. “Ugh, nigga, what you do, sleep in ya car?” I asked in regards to his disheveled appearance.
“Hell yeah. I was drunk as fuck and had drove out here last night after the party but you didn’t answer and I was too loaded to try and drive back.”
I moved to the side and let him in. he leaned down and tried to kiss my lips and I turned my head so his kiss kind of landed in the corner of my eye. I laughed as Baby Tone slapped his face and told him to no. He was starting to say small words and ‘no,’ ‘stop’ and ‘mama’ were at the top of his list. I set him down on the floor so that he could walk to the kitchen. I had plans of babyproofing the house while he was gone to Gio’s for the weekend. Now that he was fully mobile, I knew he would be into everything.
Baby Tone and I had walked into the kitchen and I turned around to find Chris on my heels. “Uh uh, nigga. Take yo stankin’ ass in the bathroom and go clean up,” I said, frowning at him. He smelled like alcohol and bad breath and he wasn’t about to funk up my kitchen. He smirked and turned around heading for the stairs.
I sat Baby Tone in his high chair and started to feed him as I talked to him about life and how much his daddy and auntie loved him and would have loved to been there with him. I showed him pictures of them on my phone constantly and he knew his father’s face to where he said “Da-Da” whenever I showed him. My son was super smart and I always insured him that he was loved. I finished feeding him and then sat him in his playpen so that he could play and watch Sprout.
“Jae, why the hell all my shit packed up into a duffle bag?” Chris asked, visibly pissed as he walked into the kitchen.
I sat down with my plate and pushed his toward him. I didn’t want to end on a bad note so I was trying to remain calm. I wasn’t mad at him but I was just ready to move on. Chris stared at me as I continued to eat my food as if he hadn’t just asked me a question. We sat and ate for a minute without saying a word.
“So you cleaning house or are you trying to get some space from me? What?” Chris asked as he sat his fork down on his plate and picked up his glass of orange juice and gulped it down.
“No, I just decided to give you your things so that you could go and be with your family. You know, be a father or something to your child so that you don’t have to keep trying not to be one to mine,” I said as I took a bite of my sausage.
Chris began to cough as he choked on his food. “Man, what you talking about?” he managed to push out in between coughs.
I grabbed my phone and pulled up the direct message that I had received this morning. “I’m not even mad, Chris. I wish you the best but I’m over trying to make this anything,” I said as I scraped the last bit of grits and eggs onto my fork.
Chris just stared at the phone for a moment before looking up and opening his mouth. I didn’t really care what he had to say but I would satisfy his ego by listening as if I did care. I stared at him, admiring his sexy ass beard and wished I could just take his face and body and put it with somebody else’s personality. You had to build a nigga nowadays in order to be happy. I was cool on relationships for a minute. I would rather just have a few friends because it seemed like one nigga just couldn’t be everything you needed. They needed too many hoes, so shit, if you can’t beat them, join them.
“Jae, it ain’t what it seems. I don’t be fucking that bitch and I don’t even want that baby. I told her to get an abortion a week ago when I found out,” he said like that was the magical key to make me suddenly feel differently.
I laughed because obviously he was lost and needed a reality check. “That’s the issue, Christian. You want to run around like a man controlling everybody’s lives and not seeing that there are things called priorities that you must get in order. If you don’t want babies then take precautions to avoid them,” I said as I stood up and cleared the dishes. I turned towards Chris and continued, “You wanted me to get pregnant but clearly wanted nothing to do with the child I have already. Now you have a bitch pregnant and want nothing to do with that child. That’s not the kind of man I want in my life and it’s definitely not the kind of man that I want my son to turn into.”
I shook my head as Chris put his head in his hands, shaking his head. I stood there trying to think about what all I needed to buy from Target in order to babyproof the house. Chris looked back up at me with tears in his eyes and I had to turn away because I had to keep myself from laughing in his face.
“Jaeda, you got to let me show you that I can be the man you want; even be that father figure for your son,” he begged and I shook my head.
“Chris, I’m done. Congrats on the baby but it’s time for you to go. I have things to do.” I got up and walked upstairs, grabbed his bag and walked back down to hand it to him.
As I walked him to the front door, Baby Tone looked up and smiled. “Bye, bye,” he said, waving. I laughed at his innocence and let Chris out.
Once he stepped onto the porch he turned around and kissed my cheek. “I’m not just giving up, Jaeda. I love you,” he said and I closed the door without responding.
I walked back into the living room and picked up my son, hugging him tight and kissing his cheek as he kissed me back. “I love you, my adorable prince,” I said and we headed upstairs to bathe and get dressed.
I pulled up to Gio’s house and grabbed Baby Tone out of his car seat. His fat ass was getting to heavy to be still trying to carry him in that infant car seat. I wanted to switch him into the next seat up but I said I was going to wait until he actually was a year old before I did so. As I grabbed his small hand as we walked up the driveway, I admired the all-white CLA45 AMG in the driveway. It was nice as hell. I was about to get on Gio’s head for going car shopping and buying new Benzes without taking me with him.
I pulled the keys out of my purse and unlocked the door. Gio had said that China was upstairs with a migraine and to just let myself in and he would be back shortly but by the look of things, he had made it back. I decided to still use my key, I didn’t want to wake China up by ringing the doorbell. I walked into the kitchen and my jaw dropped. I turned around swiftly to walk right back out.
“Damn, girl. Yo scary ass going to just walk out without speaking. You ain’t got no manners?”
I turned back around and faced Quentin. “Hello, Quentin. How are you?” I asked with a small smile on my face.
“Now was that so hard?” he asked as he walked towards me.
My heart started to race as I stared at him. I wanted to turn around and run the hell out of there. I was frozen in place as he leaned down and his cool breath brushed my cheek as h
e reached down and picked up Baby Tone and threw him in the air. I let out a sharp breath that I had been holding in for the past few seconds.
“What’s up, big boy? You walking now? You hanging with the big dogs now?” I watched as Q walked off with Baby Tone in his arms. “Let’s go talk about how we can get your mommy to stop being so scary.” I mugged Q behind his back but changed my expression as he turned back around and told Baby Tone to wave bye. I blew him a kiss and he blew me one right back.
I walked out the kitchen and took the stairs up to Charlie’s bedroom. I walked in and China was standing in there changing her diaper. “Hey, I thought you were taking a nap?” I asked as I picked up Charlie and finished dressing her as China discarded the dirty diaper. “Hey, Char Char. How’s auntie’s baby? I missed you, mamas,” I said as I began to play with her tiny toes.
She was a gorgeous baby and I couldn’t help but to want to have a little sister for Baby Tone one day but I honestly didn’t want another child if it wasn’t Tone’s. Dating somebody was one thing but I just felt like falling in love and having another nigga’s kids was like erasing the love and legacy that we’d created. “What’s up wit Q being here?” I asked China, and her ass started laughing like I told a joke.
“You must be really feeling his ass because he really got you flustered,” she said, highly amused.
“Girl, whatever. That nigga arrogant as shit. I just got rid of one headache. I don’t need another,” I said. I grabbed Charlie’s pacifier and stuck it in her mouth and placed her on my hip as we left out the room.
“Bitch, really? You finally cut Chris whack ass off?” China asked, looking at me with disbelief.
I shook my head. “I don’t know why you and Lexis act like I was in love with this nigga or something. No. He was just a sexy ass nigga with dope dick and a fire ass tongue. Other than that, I’m glad to be done with him,” I said, following China down the stairs and into the family room.