“There’s something you need to know,” I say, taking a deep breath. “She tried to kiss me again.”
“When?”
“When you were gone.”
Harley wants to know the details and I tell her every last one. I don’t hold anything back. She listens patiently and pulls her hand away from mine.
“I stopped it right away. I didn’t even linger for a moment.”
“Why did she do that?”
“Because she needs someone to care about her. No matter how much someone loves her, it’s never enough. And the men she is choosing to be with don’t even give her a little bit of what she needs.”
Harley nods and walks around the room, wrapping her hands around her arms.
“Do you miss her?” she asks after a moment.
“No. Absolutely not.”
She nods in that way that isn’t entirely convincing.
I walk over to her and pull her toward me. At first, she resists, but then she lets me in.
“I love you, Harley. I love you so much and that’s why I told you. Because I didn’t want there to be any secrets between us.”
She nods. I don’t think she gets it. I lift up her chin toward mine, focusing my gaze on hers. For a moment, I lose myself in the beauty of her irises.
“I love you, too,” she whispers, pressing her lips onto mine.
As soon as our mouths collide, a powerful sensation courses through my entire body all at once.
I want her.
I crave her.
I’m going to scream if I don’t have her right this minute. I walk backward toward the bed and pull her on top of me.
She gives off a little moan and I quickly move her underneath me.
22
Jackson
When we get close…
Our mouths weld to each other’s and separate only briefly when we gasp for breath. My body feels strong and powerful against hers, while hers is small and soft in that good way.
The clothes that I’m wearing suddenly become an impediment and I can’t wait to get them off me.
Leaning to one side doesn’t do much good, so I jump up onto my knees, straddling her and pull off my shirt.
She runs her fingers down my abs, which I flex for her benefit. She smiles and licks her lips.
I stand up and pull her up to a sitting position. But when I tug at her shirt, she cowers away from me.
“What’s wrong?” I ask, putting my lips onto hers again.
“Nothing,” she mumbles.
I try to pull off her shirt again, but again she blocks me. I pull away slightly to take a look at her face. Her eyes refuse to meet mine.
“I’m sorry,” she says, pushing me out of the way and getting off the bed.
I give her some space.
After waiting a few minutes, I walk over to her slowly. She is standing in front of the floor-to-ceiling window, staring at the bright lights of Manhattan. This is a quiet residential street, but there’s nothing really peaceful about it.
“It’s too soon,” Harley says quietly.
I know what she means.
It’s too soon to do that after what happened at the hospital.
It’s too soon be intimate after losing so much. I was expecting that. The doctor told me that it can take six weeks or more for her to feel normal again.
But when the moment happened, all of that information flew out of my mind and I just lost myself in her body.
I nod, wrapping my arms around her. I am thankful that she doesn’t push me away.
We stand staring at the trees below us and watch as three teenage girls laugh and skip across the street.
I can’t hear what they’re saying, but I sense their carefree spirit and I hope that one day I will feel as free as they do in this moment.
“Thanks for telling me about Aurora trying to kiss you,” Harley finally says. “I believe you.”
“Thank you for trusting me,” I say, giving her a peck on the cheek.
We stand leaning against each other for a while.
“I’ve been thinking about something,” she says after a moment.
“What?” I ask, enjoying the feel of her head against my shoulder.
“I don’t know anything about Parker.”
I shrug, not really understanding why this matters one way or another.
“He knows so much about me, but I don’t know anything about him.”
“Why do you even want to?”
“I need to find him.”
Her words come out softly, but with determination. I pull away from her, not certain if I can trust my ears. Did I really just hear that? Did she really just say that?
I wait for her to explain, but she doesn’t. She just stares into space, lost somewhere in the lights below.
“What are you talking about?” I finally ask. Harley looks up at me. The expression on my face, contorted and tense, takes her by surprise.
“What?” she asks as if she hadn’t just dropped a bomb on me.
“What do you mean you need to find Parker?”
“When Aurora and I were talking, she asked me about Parker. Who he is, where he’s from. Just basic facts. And the thing is that I didn’t know the answers.”
“So what? Who cares?”
“How could I know so little about this person who knows everything about me? Who stalked me? Who kidnapped me?”
“What does it matter?” I ask, taking a step away from her, unsure how to react.
“Well, he knows everything about me. He watches. And my way of dealing with him this whole time was to just put him out of my mind. And that’s not right.”
Everything that she is saying is something that I’ve thought about before. We do know very little about him and that’s not the best way to deal with the enemy. Especially now that he has gone on the offensive again.
But I can’t allow her to put herself in danger in order to find him. He has hurt her enough already.
“I don’t think it’s a very good idea for you to try to find out all of these things,” I say as calmly as possible. But her eyes still flare up at me.
“I don’t really care,” she snaps.
“It’s not safe, Harley.”
“It’s not safe doing what I’m doing now.”
“So…what is your plan?”
“I’m going to try to research him. He’s an enemy and the way to fight him is to understand him the best that I can.”
I clench my jaw, shaking my head.
“Don’t you understand? I don’t know anything about him besides that he used to read my blog. I mean, don’t you find that a bit strange?”
I shrug.
“I used to think that he was going to stop. One of these days he will find another hobby and just stop, but I don’t think that’s going to happen anymore.”
I don’t want to say it out loud, but I agree with her. I know she’s right. Parker Huntington is obsessive and he won’t let up until he gets what he wants. What he wants is Harley.
“It’s not that I don’t agree with you,” I say slowly. “It’s just that I don’t want you to get hurt.”
She rolls her eyes at first, but then adds, “I know.”
“Do you understand?” I ask, taking a step closer to her and putting my hands on her shoulders. “I love you. I nearly lost you twice. I can’t let you do this.”
“You can’t let me? Who the hell do you think you are?” Harley says, pulling away from me.
23
Jackson
When we fight…
I immediately regret my choice of words, but not the meaning. I will do everything in my power to protect her.
Even though, at this point, it doesn’t feel like there is much that I can do.
“You know what I mean,” I say.
“No, I don’t. I really don’t, Jackson. I mean, he kidnapped me, almost killing me. He killed Martin. He made me lose our child. What more do you need him to do?”
Her words make my b
lood curl. Does she really think that I don’t care? Does she really think that I would just let him do all of these things without repercussion?
“I don’t know where he is, Harley. I want nothing more than to wrap my hands around his throat and hold on tightly until I vanquish every bit of life in him.”
“So do I,” she says, narrowing her eyes.
We stand staring at each other, knowing one another’s grief. Within a moment, my grief turns to anger, roiling around in the pit of my stomach. I look down at my hands and I realize that they are balled up into fists.
“I don’t want you getting involved with this,” I say after a moment.
“I don’t know what kind of bubble you are living in, but I am already involved. This is all because of me. Martin is dead because of me.”
“No, he’s dead because he was a bodyguard.”
“Yeah, hired to protect me.”
“So, if anything, he is dead because of me,” I say. “I was the one who hired him.”
She glares at me. I stare back at her.
“And what about our baby?” she asks. “He or she is dead because of me.”
Tears start to roll down her face. I pull her close to me. She pushes away at first, but then her body goes limp, falling into my arms.
I don’t know where to go from here. I know that we are both angry, but I am also scared. I am petrified of what will happen if I can’t protect her. And I know that I can’t.
“I am just really afraid of losing you,” I whisper over and over again.
The following morning, things between Harley and me are not much improved. We are cordial and polite but there’s a tension that I never felt before.
I know that we should talk about what happened more and what she plans on doing, if anything, but I have an important meeting this morning and I don’t have time to start an in-depth conversation.
Nor do I have the energy.
Besides Parker Huntington, there’s another pressing issue on my mind. Andrew Lindell.
He is the asshole who forced me to sell Minetta.
I thought that selling my shares would be the end of our involvement but he is pressing me into service.
I have no interest in running a company as a CEO for hire, but if I don’t then he will fire every employee there just to spite me.
I used to love my job.
I used to look forward to getting up each day and trying to figure out how to make the company bigger and into what content areas we should expand.
But now that I am no longer a part of it, now that I am forced to work there, I dread it.
Every email that I get from Avery Phillips feels like an anchor that’s pulling me further and further down to the bottom of the ocean.
I am doing my best to try to make things right there, to make the best decisions for Minetta, but it all just seems to pull me closer and closer to drowning. Minetta isn’t doing well and Lindell knows it.
Now, I have to meet with him and explain.
I arrive at the meeting at the most expensive steakhouse in Manhattan right on time, and not a moment early.
I expect Andrew to make me wait, in some sort of power move, but am surprised to see that he is already here.
The look on his face is so pleasant that he actually appears to be happy to see me.
After a firm handshake and a few pleasantries, I take my seat right across from him and open the wine menu.
He recommends a red that I’ve never tried before and the sommelier brings it out for me to taste.
“I’ll take a glass of that, thank you,” I say, turning my attention to the menu.
“The filet mignon is delicious here,” he says.
“I don’t know if you know, but I don’t eat meat,” I say. This takes him by surprise and that surprises me.
“Oh, I had no idea.”
I don’t know if he’s lying, but I get the sense that he isn’t. When he invited me here, I thought that he just didn’t care.
“Would you like to go somewhere else?” he asks. From what I know about him, he isn’t the most accommodating person in the world. So, I’m not quite sure where this is all coming from. I scan the menu quickly.
“No, it’s fine,” I say. “I’ll get the salmon. I eat fish, eggs, and vegetables, of course. Just not meat.”
24
Jackson
At lunch…
“Is there any particular reason you don’t eat meat?” Andrew asks.
“Welfare of animals,” I say without missing a beat. “I’m planning on cutting out dairy as well.”
I expect him to ask me more about it, but he doesn’t. Instead, he gives me his condolences for what happened to Martin and Harley.
“Thank you. I appreciate you saying that.”
“So, how is Harley doing now?”
“As well as can be expected.”
I know that we are not here to talk about Harley and I want to get to the point as quickly as possible, but I also don’t want to be unnecessarily rude. I do technically work for him and it’s in my best interest to keep things pleasant.
He asks me more questions about the attack and I answer them as succinctly as I can without providing too much of an explanation. I keep trying to pivot the conversation to something else but he keeps bringing it back to this.
Finally, when our food arrives, I say, “I appreciate you asking about Harley and everything that we have gone through, but I am certain that’s not why you invited me here.”
“Well, then you would be wrong,” Andrew says, leaning back in his chair. I narrow my eyes. What does he mean by this?
“The thing is that Minetta isn’t doing well, as you know.”
I shrug, nodding. “I am doing my best to turn things around.”
“Yes, actually, I am aware of that. Thank you.”
He cuts into his steak and takes a bite. I wait for him to continue.
“We’ve been in contact with a public relations firm that will allow us to raise the profile of the company in general. Build more sympathy and public awareness of what it is that we do here.”
“Plenty of people listen to our podcasts and read our articles,” I say.
“Yes, plenty of people do, but most don’t. There was a recent poll about that. Outside of those who are highly educated and politically inclined individuals, few are even aware of what a podcast is.”
I know the article that he is citing and I know that this is a big problem.
The reason why most podcasts are about politics is that that’s who the listeners are.
And that’s precisely why most people who aren’t interested in politics don’t have any podcasts to listen to that would be of interest.
“Anyway, it was the PR people’s idea that we use what happened to you as a way to raise Minetta’s profile in the media.”
I furrow my brows.
“So, that’s why all of those articles came out about the shooting right afterward?”
He nods.
“I am sorry about that, but I hope that the media spotlight will do some good as well. From what I hear, Parker Huntington, Harley’s kidnapper, is still at large. Perhaps all of this media coverage can help capture him.”
I’ll give Andrew Lindell one thing. He certainly does his homework.
“Why do I get the feeling that you are about to ask me a favor?” I ask, taking a bite of my salad.
“Well, it’s not so much a favor as a request,” Andrew says, smiling out of the corner of his mouth.
I sit back and wait.
“Now that we have established interest in you as the CEO of Minetta and this horrible thing that has happened to your girlfriend and unborn child, we need to give the public something to root for.”
I drop my fork to the floor.
When it hits the tile, it makes a loud dinging sound, startling him for a moment. Did he just say what I think he said? I stare at him waiting for him to continue but he doesn’t.
“What do you mean
‘you established interest in Minetta?’ Did you tell them about Harley being pregnant?”
“Well, not me personally,” he says with a satisfied expression on his face.
I shake my head.
“What are you telling me exactly?” I ask.
He tilts his head and smiles. “Jackson, I think you know.”
“How did they even know about her pregnancy?”
“You work for us and we have very good people in charge of our investigations.”
“But why were you even investigating us?”
“Jackson, it is our job to know what is going on in our employees’ lives. Especially those as powerful and high up as you are.”
“So…you followed her?”
“Yes, we followed her,” he says as if he hadn’t done anything wrong. “Of course. And when the investigator reported that she was going to an OB-GYN then we did a further investigation and discovered that she was indeed pregnant with your child.”
I clench my fists in anger. Who does this guy think he is? But when my eyes meet his, I realize that he is not cowering at this news at all. He doesn’t even think that he did anything wrong.
“You can’t do that,” I say. “You can’t just invade my girlfriend’s privacy like this.”
“Well, maybe not, but I did,” he says smugly. I want to punch him in his arrogant face, and I grab the table to stop myself from actually doing it.
25
Jackson
Later at lunch…
Harley thinks that it was Parker who followed her to the doctor’s office and then leaked her pregnancy to the press, but it was actually Lindell this whole time.
Why is he so paranoid?
Why is he involved in my personal life?
I am angry and I am tempted to storm off but doing that isn’t going to get me the answers I need.
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