His Tormented Heart

by Katee Robert

  Staying on the island might keep her safe for a while longer, but eventually someone would get to her. Their defenses weren’t foolproof—Delilah was more than enough evidence of that. Eventually Nicholai would get to Amarante, and then he’d make an example of her just like he made examples of anyone who broke his rules.

  Another shrug. “Everything has its price.”

  “No.” He shot to his feet again. “Absolutely fucking not. You don’t get to play martyr. He doesn’t get to take you from us, too.”

  “Better me than any of you.”

  Now Kenzie was on her feet, too. “Fuck that and fuck you for even suggesting it. We can’t get to him immediately? Fine. We’ll figure out another way.” She ran her fingers through her long blond hair. “I can’t believe I have to keep talking you and Ryu off the fucking ledge. He is not a reflection of you, and you aren’t responsible for what he did. You don’t get to punish yourself for what happened in that place. Neither of you do.” She cursed long and hard, her hazel eyes snapping. “If I have to tie you down until further notice, I’ll damn well do it. You know I will.”

  Luca looked like he might be sick. “You really think I’d ask that of you? That I’d take my happiness at the expense of your life? What the hell, Te? Just … What the fucking hell?”

  Ryu could actually feel his family fracturing around him. Kenzie kept threatening to tie Amarante down, getting more and more creative with her methods the angrier she got. Luca looked like he couldn’t decide whether to throttle Amarante or throw his lot in with Kenzie and lock her up. Liam and Cami wisely kept out of it, though both them look concerned.

  “Enough!” He didn’t realize he intended to speak until his bellow silenced their fighting. Ryu met each of their gazes in turn and lowered his voice. “That is enough.”

  “Ryu—”

  He pointed at his sister. Of them all, he knew what drove her. She might not acknowledge the guilt their bloodline brought, but he felt it right down to his marrow. His sister was not fatalistic, and if they forced her to slow down long enough, she’d find a better way forward. He needed to give her reason to slow down. “I need a week.”

  She tossed up her hands. “You’ve had several and haven’t made any meaningful progress. What is one more week going to accomplish?”

  “A week, Te. I’ll find a better way forward, and you will respect that plan.” He gave the barest of pauses. “I want your word.”

  “Ryu, no.”

  “Your word, Te. Give it or I let Kenzie and Luca tie your ass up and lock you in a room until we figure out an alternative course.”

  “You wouldn’t dare,” she snarled.

  Kenzie took a step forward. “You know I damn well would dare.”

  “Fine! You get a week. Not a single hour more.” She shoved off the desk and stalked away.

  Silence reigned for several beats. Kenzie turned to Ryu and propped her hands on her hips. “Okay, we have a week. Now what?”

  “I’ll take care of it.” In the end, there was only one string to pull. Delilah. He didn’t even know beyond a shadow of a doubt that his father was behind her betrayal. The Horsemen had made quite a few enemies over the years, and it could easily be one of them who’d taken exception. Ryu didn’t believe that, though. The timing was too coincidental to be a coincidence. That said, he knew better than to tell his siblings about her. Even now.

  Especially now.

  With fear for Amarante driving them, they’d do whatever it took to ensure her safety. They’d hang Delilah for the information, and happily.

  No, Ryu had to find a balance that would find him answers and save his sister, which meant he was the only one who could do it. And it had to be now. If he had a week to get answers, he couldn’t afford to waffle for even an hour. He turned and strode for the exit.

  “Where are you going?” Luca called after him.

  “I said I’ll take care of it, and I will.”

  Even knowing time was of the essence, he still took a detour out to the low cliffs on the backside of Pleasure. They kept the guests to the inner island and the beach in the inlet, so very few people wandered out on this side of the building. He usually didn’t come out here during the day, preferring to sit against the outer wall and look at the stars on clear nights. But the soft shushing sound of the ocean usually soothed him and brought a kind of clarity that sitting in front of a computer for hours on end could fuzz.

  It didn’t work today.

  He looked out over the sun glinting off the water and all he could think about was the fact that Delilah couldn’t swim. A few reckless mental steps would put him right back in the pool with her. Had she intended her betrayal even then? She must have.

  Surprising how much that hurt. The jagged pain in his chest only increased with time. He’d been intent to let this play out until he could find a way to talk to her, but that wasn’t an option any longer. Seven days. He exhaled slowly. Seven days was a small eternity or a blink of the eye. He already knew how this would go.

  Blink of the eye.

  He had to move now. Ryu scrubbed his hands over his face. He could use a shower and six hours of sleep, but both would have to wait. The conversation with Delilah happened now.

  Whether they were ready for it or not.

  Delilah couldn’t sleep. She’d thought succeeding in her task would bring a sense of relief, but all that remained was an impending feeling of doom. She’d assumed it couldn’t get worse. It almost made her laugh in the here and now. Couldn’t get worse? She knew better. Every time she’d let herself fall into that lie while she was a child, tucking it around herself like a threadbare blanket, her father had gone and proved her wrong.

  Every. Time.

  She’d been on her own too long; she was out of practice. Instead of focusing on survival at any cost, she’d let herself fall into the belief that this threat would pass. She had no exit strategy in place. It didn’t matter that they probably would have reacted the same way if she tried to leave the island before now. What mattered was that she hadn’t even thought to try. Not really. She’d been too busy trading off cowering in fear and tripping over her own feet with lust.

  The irony wasn’t lost on her.

  She’d spent eight years dealing in the very lust her father accused her of cultivating. Maybe it started off out of desperation and the need to give him the middle finger in the only way she knew how. Defiance. Eight years of cultivating lust in others and only allowing herself little sips to keep the dragon at bay. She should have known that it’d bite her in the ass at the most inopportune of times.

  A knock on her door stopped her runaway thoughts in their tracks.

  She crossed to it, but stopped before she touched the lock, silently debating with herself. Letting anyone in at this point was just adding to the potential clusterfuck. She was tired and sore and emotionally bruised. She didn’t have the wherewithal to put on a mask and play to expectations.

  “Delilah.”

  Ryu.

  She closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against the cool wood of the door. “It’s seven in the morning. Dinner isn’t for another twelve hours.”

  “Let me in, Delilah.”

  Something in his voice had red flags waving inside her. She opened her eyes. “I’m really tired. Can we raincheck?”

  “No.” The lock flashed green and clicked open, which was the only warning she got to scramble out of the way before Ryu pushed the door open and stepped into the room. She opened her mouth to tell him off, but the words stalled somewhere south of her throat.

  In the two hours since she’d seen him last, something had changed. This wasn’t the intense man she’d spent so much time with over the last couple days. This wasn’t even the sexy partner who’d dominated their bed games.

  No, this was Pestilence.

  Delilah took a step back before she could stop herself, and something like pain flared in his dark eyes. Ryu shook his head and locked her door. “Don’t look at me like that.”


  “You just came into my apartment uninvited and now you’re locking yourself in here with me. I don’t think you get to tell me how I should or shouldn’t look at you.”

  He stopped short, some of his coldness ebbing away. “That’s fair.”

  “Thank you, Ryu, for telling me something I already know.” She could hear the strident tone in her voice, could hear the anger covering up the fear, but she couldn’t stop it. “I’d like an explanation.”

  “That makes two of us.” He motioned at the kitchen. “You have coffee?”

  “Not for you.” She bit her bottom lip. Hard. Get a hold of yourself. Delilah propped her hands on her hips. “I’ll put a pot on. You talk.”

  He nodded. “Okay.”

  She didn’t trust this agreeable Ryu any more than she trusted the man who’d walked through her door with all sorts of retribution written across his face. Something was going one, and she couldn’t pretend it had nothing to do with her. He obviously had found something out, whether it was on his phone or by other means. He’d just as obviously decided to come talk to her himself, rather than hauling her in for questioning or however the Horsemen usually handled this sort of thing.

  Questioning. Torture. Murder.

  You’re spinning out.

  Stop.

  Breathe.

  Focus.

  She carefully measured out her scoops into the filter and then filled the coffee pot with water. The focus didn’t stop her hands from shaking, but it helped calm her thoughts. A little. “Why are you here, Ryu? Why like this?”

  “Why did you take my phone?”

  “What?” Her fingers went slack and she dropped the coffee pot.

  Ryu caught it before it hit the floor. He set it on the counter and turned her to face him. She had the vague notion to resist his hand on her shoulder, but Delilah couldn’t seem to form coherent thought. They stood there, close enough to kiss, and she might as well have been looking at a stranger. Ryu hid his feelings more effectively than she ever had. “Why did you take my phone, Delilah?”

  To lie or not to lie? She didn’t know. She just didn’t know.

  “Ryu …”

  “The truth.” No forgiveness there for her in his dark eyes.

  If she gave him the truth, what would he do with it? Delilah didn’t know. She wanted to see his presence in her apartment as a good sign, as some indication that she could trust him. If it was just her life in the mix, maybe she could. It wasn’t just her, though. Esther’s safety hung in the balance.

  Her life was on the line.

  She took a ragged breath and lowered her eyes. She couldn’t guarantee what they’d show him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Damn it, Delilah.” He touched her chin with a single finger, lifting her face up. “Don’t make me do this.”

  If he killed her, what would happen to Esther? The Horsemen wouldn’t hurt her. She believed that with her entire being. The man on the other end of the phone, though? She couldn’t be sure, but he’d have no reason to. Esther was leverage. If Delilah died, she wouldn’t serve as leverage anymore and they’d have no reason to hurt her.

  The thought of death shouldn’t bring her so much peace.

  She met his gaze directly. Some of the steel bled back into her spine. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she repeated. If it was just her … No point in thinking like that. It wasn’t just her. It hadn’t ever been just her.

  Ryu closed his eyes for a long moment. When he opened them, there was no mercy to be found. “So be it.” He took one step back and then another. “Get your things.”

  Alarm flared despite her determination to meet her fate calmly. “What?”

  “Until you tell me the truth, you are no longer an employee of the Island of Ys.” His tone was bored and distant. So, so cold. “You’re also not a guest.”

  She stood there, feeling very small and vulnerable. “You’re kicking me off the island?”

  “And let an unknown threat loose?” He shook his head sharply. “No.” Ryu motioned at the room. “Get the things you can’t bear to part with, Delilah. You have five minutes.”

  She didn’t ask for clarification again. If he planned on killing her, would he have her gather her things? Delilah didn’t know. Because she didn’t know, she didn’t question the order. She simply walked to her closet and pulled out the bag tucked into the back that she’d stashed there for emergencies. A holdover from her and Esther’s initial days on the run. They never knew when they’d have to bolt in the middle of the night. Their father didn’t pursue them for long, but the threat of him was enough to keep their instincts sharp. Later, there were other dangers, other reasons when it paid for them to have an exit strategy in place.

  Eight years later, and she was still prepared to flee from danger instead of fight.

  She tried not to think about that too hard.

  Delilah didn’t spare a glance at the spot where she’d hidden the phone beneath the mattress. Either they’d find it or they wouldn’t. If they did, she’d just claim ignorance. It wouldn’t work any more than her denying messing with Ryu’s phone, but she had to hold firm.

  Esther’s life depended on it.

  Ryu’s expression didn’t change when she stopped in front of him. He just gave a short nod. “Don’t do anything stupid.”

  Too late.

  The hysterical thought had a laugh bubbling up her throat. She managed to smother it at last moment, but it was a close thing. Don’t do anything stupid? Like get pulled into some plot against four of the most dangerous people on the planet? Like sleep with Ryu even though she knew she’d have to betray him? Like still wanting to tell him the truth even though she knew it was the worst mistake she could make?

  She kept her lips pressed together as she follow him down the hallway to a side door. It led out to a patio and short dock that employees used to smoke and sun themselves, depending on the time of day and season. She stopped short at the sight of a boat bobbing next to the dock. “You lied.”

  “I didn’t.” He pressed a hand to the small of her back, moving her forward despite the way she dug in her heels. “We’re not leaving the island.”

  “That’s a boat.”

  “Yes, that’s a boat.”

  Realization washed over her and her knees went weak. “You’re going to take me out on the water and throw me in.”

  “What?”

  She pressed a hand to her mouth, the world going hazy. “Just an accident, right? It’s not your fault that I couldn’t swim.”

  “Jesus, Delilah.” Ryu grabbed her shoulders and turned her to face him. He didn’t look cold right then. He looked furious. “I’m not going to murder you.”

  “Why not? You think I’m a traitor.”

  “You are a traitor.” He said it with such surety, she thought she might be sick. “That doesn’t mean I’m going to murder you in cold blood.”

  “Just a little hot-blooded murder, then.” A hysterical giggle escaped. She couldn’t seem to stop talking. All these years of learning to control herself and faced with the very real possibility of her death at the hands of Ryu and she’d completely lost her shit. “Fine. Go ahead. It’s not like I don’t deserve it, right?”

  Chapter 12

  There was no point in continuing this conversation. The longer they stood there, the greater the chance someone would see it and wonder why Ryu was having an argument with a clearly upset Delilah. Employees wouldn’t interfere, but they’d contact Amarante, and she wouldn’t hesitate to get involved. He had to get Delilah away from here before that happened.

  Ryu wouldn’t take her out and toss her to a watery death. He couldn’t promise the same when it came to his sister.

  With nothing left to do, he grabbed Delilah and tossed her over his shoulder. The only way this would work was if he got her out of here. Now. He took the trail down to the boat at a reckless pace and dumped them both into the little craft. It wasn’t meant for the open s
ea, which was fine because he’d been telling the truth—he had no intention of taking Delilah from the island.

  He just needed to get her away from this part of it.

  Delilah stopped sputtering the second he got the engine going. He hated how she watched him, her dark eyes wide and terrified. She truly thought he’d drown her, and damn if that realization didn’t make him sick to his stomach.

  If she was anyone else, it wasn’t out of the realm of possibilities.

  His hands weren’t clean. They hadn’t had a chance to be clean, not when he grew up in Camp Bueller, not when they escaped and had to fight tooth and nail for every little thing for years. Not when they’d set out on this path to bring down their own personal bogeyman. He wished he could blame all those actions on the person who put him down the path in the first place, but Ryu had worked too hard for freedom to do anything but take responsibility for his actions.

  He’d killed people.

  He would kill more before this was out.

  That wasn’t what kept him up at night. No, his nightmares went back a lot further, and he had always held close the knowledge that he and his siblings didn’t go after anyone who didn’t deserve it. Ryu made sure of that with his research and hacking and compiling evidence.

  He’d never seen Delilah coming.

  Even now, even knowing she’d stolen his phone long enough to allow someone to hack it, he still wasn’t convinced she deserved punishment. He simply wanted to know why.

  Ryu guided the boat out of the bay and around the north side of the island. The west coastline faced the larger uninhabited island that they owned and used for various purposes. It also housed a handful of large villas for the clientele who wanted more privacy. Every one of those villas was outfitted with cameras and mics to ensure that privacy was only an illusion, but it wasn’t something the Horsemen advertised.

  People should know what they signed up for when they came to the Island of Ys. Having their every fantasy played out came with a price. If they weren’t smart enough to realize that … Well, it wasn’t the Horsemen’s fault.