by Ariana Kenny
****
I sat, back at the apartment, in a spot that had my back to the wall. I eyed off the dark passageway to the main bedroom and the ensuite where I had that experience this morning. It had made me anxious, to say the least. I flicked through the book trying to latch on to anything that jolted a memory. There was a lot on symbology, links to Wiccan current practice, some information on the Asatru Sabian had mentioned, but nothing that seemed to spring out at me.
I flicked through a few more pages to see what lay ahead, and I saw a symbol that I did seem to recognize. A Triskele. A triple spiral from pre-Celtic times, representing three aspects of existence, land, sky or sea, or mental, manifest and other-worldly. There were lots of interpretations. It looked nothing like the triple triangle I had seen this morning, but it still drew my curiosity.
As I centered my thoughts on the particular design in front of me I heard the tap start to drip.
At first I held my breath and didn't even dare to look over. When I finally summoned up enough courage, I slowly turned to see where the offending sound was coming from. The kitchen. I felt relief that it wasn't the same room as this morning, but I was still hesitant. I cautiously left my safe space on the couch to venture into the kitchen. As I reached out tentatively to tighten the tap I anticipated something terrible. But there was nothing. I sighed in relief.
When I made my way back to the couch, I couldn't quite relax. I flicked through the book, but found I was staring into the black doorway of the main bedroom, peering at it out of the side of my eye. I shifted slightly to detract my view, then decided the TV might do the trick. I had barely switched it on when there came a creak in the floorboards behind me. I jumped up, but again, there was nothing there.
"Stupid" I said to myself, "Just floorboards, just a tap, just my imagination." I huffed and decided to go out anyway. Fresh air and something to eat might settle my overactive mind.
The fresh night air was exactly what I needed. I wandered around until I saw a night market near the river nearby. After exploring everything there was on offer, I bought noodles from one of the stands and walked further down the river. I loved the city lights reflecting on the dark river. I perched on a bench in a darker space towards the bridge and wrestled with the cheap chopsticks that came with the noodles. I actually felt like I had done this before, or something very close to it.
I had given up on the rest of my noodles, and was busy lost in thoughts when I heard Sam's voice behind me.
"Are you seriously sitting alone at night in the dark near a bridge? Are you wired for getting into trouble?" When he asked, my first instinct was to snap back,but I kept myself in check, and was glad, because the next thing he did was sit beside me.
"Well I'm not alone now, so it's all in the past really......."
"Hmm. This how you snare all your men then? Hang out by the river."
"You'd think they would be hanging off me hey."
"You are different Rachael, a huge contradiction, no fear, yet almost a shrinking Violet."
"Better an enigma than an open book." I decided to put the pressure back on him. "Are you supposed to be here, with me, I mean? You were freaking out this morning." I noticed in the corner of my vision a man crossing the bridge had stopped to stare at Sam and I.
"Work and downtime...need to be separate." Continued Sam. He had his back turned to the man on the bridge, so hadn't even noticed we were being watched. The man looked vaguely familiar but I couldn't quite place him.
"Downtime, I'm downtime. Happy to be me." I batted back.
"I think you know what I mean." Sam insisted before he stretched. "It's getting late. You headed home?"
"I didn't know you looked after curfews too Mr police man." Sam frowned at my comment and didn't budge.
"You want company walking home or not?"
"Definitely." I looked at the man on the bridge suspiciously. "Hey Sam, that guy standing on the bridge watching us - I recognise him from somewhere."
He looked away almost as soon as his eyes made contact with the figure "Shit. He's from work. The admin there."
"So this is bad?" I asked.
"Only if he makes a bigger deal of things than he needs to." Admitted Sam. "I should have been paying more attention."
I tossed my noodles in the nearby bin and walked with Sam back to the apartment. He walked close enough that I could smell him, feel his presence over me. We talked about nothing, and everything.... Anything that came up, and the half hour walk back felt like it took no time at all. Stands to reason, I would find myself falling for someone who wasn't technically allowed to spend time with me. Eventually we were back at my doorway.
There was a too awkward pause before Sam left. I opened the door to the apartment I was staying in as he leaned casually against the wall. I thought about inviting him in but I doubted he would accept. I turned to face him and I there was a moment where we caught each others gaze. He straightened up and shoved his hands into his pockets, diverting his eyes. My breath became shallow. Tonight had been so great, just to have someone to talk to. He was really an amazing guy. I felt so comfortable with him, except now....now was awkward. Tense.
Finally he spoke. "So, I'm going to head now...."
I nodded and moved in to the entranceway before stopping. I paused to look back and he did the same, but as we did, he just smiled, as did I. Then we both turned away, I entering the room, he walking down the hall.
I rested on the other side of the doorway before stepping away. My heart was hammering, I felt dizzy, but in a good way. This had been the first good night I could remember. Literally, ever.
I heard a knock on the door. Good night or not, I was still cautious. I peered through the peephole. He was back.
I threw open the door quickly, looking over him quizzically.
"I know I can't really be doing this." He said, and I smirked. I didn't say anything though, I wanted to see what he was going to say next. He gulped, and looked at me guiltily. "I guess, I just wanted to say maybe ....after this is all settled...maybe we could do this again. But formally...not formally. That's not what I mean."
"That sounds good." I jumped in saving him. "When it wouldn't be mixed up with work, right?"
"Right." He repeated.
"Ok then." I clarified. I put my hand on the door, ready to close it, not that I wanted to.
"Yeah." He responded before another awkward pause. I smiled back and nodded my head.
"Yeah," he repeated again and walked away once more, looking back briefly over his shoulder. I watched him until he was halfway down the hallway, then closed the door behind me. I paused to take a deep breath, and shed the shirt I was wearing over my dress. My skin felt suddenly flushed. I went to the kitchen, got myself a glass of water and sipped it gratefully. My heart was still skipping and my breathing slightly erratic as I walked back to the door to leave my shoes there. The high heels clunked against the wooden floorboards. Maybe I should have tried to kiss him. I now had this leftover feeling like I was missing the taste of his skin on my lips. I paused as I walked, to lean against the couch to remove one of my shoes.
Just as I did, the doorbell rang. It was him, he had come back again. I hobbled the last step to the door.
"I'm coming." I laughed swinging the door open. Maybe I'd get that kiss I needed after all, I thought.
I had barely drawn in a breath when the man on the other side of the door took me by the throat. Propelling me backwards, in to the apartment, the man who had me by the throat gave way to a second man who closed the door behind him.
"Why do you look so surprised sweetheart? Think you wouldn't ever see us again?" He shook me roughly. "Did you think killing Uther was going to set you free." The man slammed me against the wall. "Where is the boy?"
I tried to answer but barely made a choking sound. He released me barely enough to choke out a few words.
"Who? You have the wrong person." I managed to sputter. I knew they wanted Jonah. But what
could they want him for.
Another violent shove rocked me. "You know who-Jonah..."
Maybe they think I took him, I thought to myself. Maybe they were bounty hunters or something hired by the parents, who forgot to call them off. "His parents have him. He's safe."
"His parents!?" There was a stunned pause. "You let him go back?." I wasn't sure if he actually wanted an answer from me, but he looked at his friend inquiringly.
"New to me. I thought she still had him." was all the man could reply.
"Can we trust them to follow through?" was the response from the man that had me pinned by the throat. I scratched at his hands. Follow through on what I worried. That pit in my stomach I had felt all along ground in my gut. This was why I had still worried so about him. Home wasn't safe. These people didn't want to help him. These weren't bounty hunters. Something in my basic being screamed out to me.
"They seemed pretty committed." Continued the friend of the man whose grasp had lessened slightly.
"What do you want with him? Do you know who I am?" I asked, even if they were going to kill me, I might get some answers. The man holding me let me go.
"You really don't know, you don't remember do you? Uther really managed to lock you up in there. I didn't think it was possible." He moved closer to me and I took an automatic step back. "Then this is going to be sweeter than I thought." He breathed into my ear, taking my arm and forcing me face first into the wall behind me.
"Something of you has to be left." He continued. "We couldn't find you until you took out those guys the other night. We tried to take their bodies before you killed them all, but we were too late. Then the poor homeless woman. I told Martin that was a mistake, but then she had seen you arrive with Sabian, which let us track him, and then find you, so it all worked out...and now we can finish things up. No more removing your memory, just plain killing you off, sending you back where you came from."
In my frozen state I saw the second man put a wooden box on the floor a few feet away, then the one holding me pull something out that looked like an ice pick. Pressing me to the wall with a knee, he swiped away the hair from the back of my neck and drew back the ice pick shaped tool. He was going to stab me in the neck. On automatic response, I twisted out and hit the man square in the jaw. Wincing from the strike, he retaliated by punching me in the face. The blow sent my head into the wall and I heard the drywall crack.
It hurt, but only really seemed to make me more angry.
I launched myself at him, grabbing him by the shirt with one hand and pants with the other. With that I threw him upwards and he bounced off the ceiling. Almost immediately there was a knocking on the ceiling from the floor above, a neighbor trying to draw attention to the noise. I was astounded as to how I had managed to toss him so high. But the chance to figure out what was happening was fleeting. The second man grabbed me from behind , pinning my arms to my side, as the one I threw into the ceiling struggled to stand.
"There you are. I knew it was just an act." The man at my back muttered. Without a second thought, I felt an enormous surge run through me. I kicked out the foot that still wore my high heeled shoe and caught the man in front, my heel cutting through his lower jaw. Blood spurted, and I twisted my foot so I left the shoe behind in his head.
Planting both my feet back to the ground, I reached back and grasped the jacket of the man behind me, flipping him over me and on to his back. I crouched as I felt the power build and felt blackness creep over me...
There was an urgent knock on the door. I brushed my hair over the side of my face that held the bruises and a cut across my swollen jaw. Steadying my breath, I tried to smile pleasantly and opened the door. An old lady carrying her fluffy white excuse for a dog stood in her dressing gown.
"I don't know what sort of place you think this is, but we don't put up with antics all through the night..." her shrill voice grated against my nerves. "Like I told the last man who was here.."
"I am truly sorry. No more noise, I promise" I uttered softly as I closed the door on her nattering.
"I am serious, believe me, I will call the owners!" There came a defeated huff from behind the door.
I sank to the floor behind the door, finally weeping into my hands. I felt like screaming, but I knew I couldn't risk anyone else knocking on my door. Not while the bodies were still here.
I did the only thing I thought I could, I took the phone off the counter beside me, pulled it to the floor and breathed through my tears. I dialed his number and sobbed again when he answered.
"Help me. Sabian please help me. Don’t tell anyone, just come over."