The only thing that could be more perfect was if this was his child. His and Lauren’s. The longing for Lauren had not diminished, no matter how many times James prayed. And this experience, holding his newborn niece in his arms? This made the hole in his life the most painful, the most poignant.
James was almost thirty years old. Life was passing him by, but no more. He’d make one last ditch effort to let Lauren know how much he loved her. He wouldn’t stop until all the words had poured out, until he’d touched her, held her in his arms and, yes, kissed her. If she walked away for good, it would be because she didn’t love him back. He’d make sure she knew exactly what she was turning down.
The thought of his dreams shut down forever clogged his throat and brought tears to his eyes. He clutched the precious bundle more tightly, and she whimpered.
“Sorry, princess,” he whispered.
“Look, James is so overcome he’s going to cry,” teased Tori. “Don’t get weepy all over the baby, big brother. Here, let me take her to Mom.”
He shifted Sophia to Tori’s arms and turned aside to blink away his emotions.
Eli gave him a lopsided grin. “A baby does that to a guy.”
“Yeah. She’s really something else. You take care of her, you hear me?”
“I think you’re talking about Sophia, not Meg.”
“Well, both of them, I guess.” James shook his head then watched his sisters stroll up the steps to the ranch house together.
Eli scooped Aiden onto his shoulders, still focused on James. “So, what’re you going to do?”
James grimaced. “I want what you’ve got, man. A wife. A monkey like this one.” He chucked Aiden under the chin then twitched his head to indicate the group on the porch. “A princess like that one.”
“I’m thankful,” Eli said simply. “God has given me far more than I deserve.”
“More than Meg deserves, too.” How had the rebel of the family gotten so lucky? She mightn’t have been married when Aiden was born, but there was no denying what a blessing the little boy was to his mommy and everyone around them.
“Yeah, God reminds me He doesn’t look at us like that. None of it is about what we deserve. We haven’t earned any of it. God looks at us and sees Jesus. Simple as that.”
“Simple, but kinda profound.”
Eli grinned. “I have my moments.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Denae perched on the edge of Lauren’s bed, holding Felix. “You look amazing, girlfriend. You’re going all out here.”
Was that a good thing or not? Lauren twirled in front of the mirror, the chiffon over-skirt swishing against her knees.
“If you’re trying to make James notice, I believe you’ll succeed. Even I’m not completely sure what you’re up to, and I’m in on it. I think.” Denae squeezed the cat until he squirmed and grumbled.
“I’m not doing this to make James jealous. I’m doing it because I made a deal with my mom that I thought would never happen. She hasn’t dated since my dad died fifteen years ago, so I thought I was safe.”
“Ooh, that’s one of my favorite things to find in a romance novel. An ill-advised pact.”
Lauren glared at her friend. “Stuff it. I’m not in the mood. Tonight is not going to be romantic. Not even a tiny bit. I’m enduring it because I gave my word to my mom.”
“I’m just saying...”
“Don’t.”
“All right then. Tell me all about it when you get home, okay?”
“Aren’t you coming to the festivities in the park? It’s the Fourth.”
Denae shrugged. “I have a deadline, and no one to go with.”
“You can meet me there.”
“Right. You’re on a hot date with Mr. Manhattan, and you want a third wheel? I’m thinking not.”
“Please don’t sit home alone while the town is celebrating. That’s just un-American.”
“Oh, there’ll be fireworks in the story I’m editing.” Denae grinned, waggling her eyebrows. “I’ll have a great time by proxy.”
The doorbell rang, and Lauren whirled back to the mirror. She didn’t wear a lot of makeup — had she even put it on right? She scrunched her curls. They were as good as they were going to get. Now, where were her shoes? Why wasn’t she ready before Luke got here?
She grabbed the straps of her sandals and jogged to the front of the duplex, took two seconds to compose herself, and opened the door.
Gone was the tall, gangly, slightly awkward teen she remembered. Today’s Luke Torrington was tanned, muscular, and glasses-free. He smiled at her — a gorgeous smile — and held out a bouquet of bright, happy gerbera daisies. “Lauren? Good to see you again. It’s been a while.”
“Hi, Luke. Come on in for a minute, and I’ll put these in water. They’re exquisite.” She’d read that line in a few novels, but never imagined she’d be the one saying them. She also had never thought she’d be thankful for the kind of mother who thought every woman should own a few pieces of crystal, but at least there was a cut-glass vase in her cabinet.
Lauren pulled out the vase, filled it with water, and arranged the blooms with shaking fingers. At least the act gave her something to focus on, something that didn’t include her stammering and staring at the unlikely man who leaned casually against her kitchen doorjamb, hands in the pockets of gray slacks. When was the last time she’d seen a guy who wasn’t in jeans?
Cheri and Kade’s wedding.
She pushed the thought of James in a tailored black suit out of her mind. Tomorrow she’d be free of her obligations and could focus on him, on trying to build a relationship on a solid foundation, if one could be had. Today, she needed to be nice to Luke. Thankfully, it didn’t look like it would be much of a hardship.
Lauren centered the bouquet on her table and smiled at Luke. “Thank you. I wasn’t expecting flowers.”
He tilted his head and smiled back before rolling back a white sleeve and glancing at his gold watch. “Ready? I told Dad we’d meet them at The Branding Iron.”
She slipped the sandals on her feet. “Ready.”
He offered his elbow, and she took it, thankful for the assistance as she navigated with unfamiliar heels. The sight of a sleek red convertible at the curb nearly did her in. Obviously, the Luke Torrington who’d left Saddle Springs a nerdy teen had met with some success in the intervening years. Only question was, why hadn’t some girl snatched him up already?
Luke helped her into the car, rounded it, and got in. As he pulled away from the curb, he asked, “Is it just me, or is the thought of our parents dating kind of awkward?”
She chuckled. “My dad died when I was fifteen. To the best of my knowledge, this is the first time my mom’s gone out since.”
“Your father was one of the good ones.”
Of course, he’d known Dad. Lauren had forgotten their shared background for a few minutes. “I take it you didn’t follow in your father’s footsteps.”
Luke shook his head. “No, I went into investment banking. A lot different than being in smelly barns at any time of day or night, regardless of the weather.”
“I love it,” she said softly. “I never wanted to do anything else.”
“Good for you.” Luke shot her a look. “I know my father appreciates having you for his partner. Thanks for that — it makes up for how much I’ve disappointed him.”
Lauren turned and looked at him. “I can’t imagine he’s disappointed in you.”
He parked the convertible in front of The Branding Iron. “He doesn’t understand my choices. Thinks my mother had a bad influence on me.” Luke offered a wry grin. “Did your mom ever hassle you for following in your dad’s footsteps?”
Lauren thought back, slowly shaking her head. “No. My mom has a lot of opinions — brace yourself for them — but, really, all she wanted for me was to follow God’s will for my life.”
Luke’s eyebrows rose. “It’s been a while since I heard that term. Sounds a bit like a cop-out. Sorry
if that offends you.”
“No, I understand that it sounds weird. The thing is... you went to church when you lived here, didn’t you?” Sounded like that no longer held true.
He grimaced. “Fourth row on the far right, every Sunday.”
“Right. It’s taken me a long time to think deeply on God’s plan and how it relates to my own will. Like, what happens if I willfully disobey what I know God wants me to do? Or what if I didn’t ask and go the wrong way? Can I ever get back in His good graces?”
Any hint of a smile had long since fled Luke’s face. “Too deep for me.”
“Important questions.”
“No, what’s important is making the world a better place than you found it. Honesty, compassion, and loyalty.”
“Those are good things, for sure.” Lauren chose her words carefully, becoming more sure of them with every word uttered. “But what God really wants of us is a relationship with Him. Everything else is secondary.”
Luke shook his head and pointed toward the restaurant. “I suggest we table this discussion before our parents decide we’ve stood them up. Ready?”
At her nod, he came around the car, opened the door, then ushered her into The Branding Iron.
* * *
James settled on a quilt between Kade and Tori, listening to Cheri and Carmen chat while their little daughters played nearby. He couldn’t remember a time when getting the gang together didn’t include Lauren. He hadn’t dared phone her to make sure she was coming, hoping against hope that tradition would win out.
Tori’s phone chimed with an incoming text as he took a quick scan around the fairgrounds while pretending not to be hunting for Lauren. His gaze froze on a couple entering the gate in the distance. Lauren. It had to be, with her short dark curls and that gorgeous turquoise dress he’d never been able to get out of his mind, but with whom? How could she be laughing up at a tall stranger who looked like a city businessman compared to any cowboy in Saddle Springs?
“Uh oh,” whispered Tori, nudging him.
“Who is that?” he asked under his breath, careful not to move his mouth. If only he could stop staring.
“Denae just texted. She was there when he picked Lauren up. That’s Luke Torrington, back for the weekend visiting his dad. Look, there’s Lauren’s mom and Doc behind them.”
Did that make it better or worse? Lauren turned to say something to her mother. Luke’s hand rested on the small of her back.
Red blood pulsed through James’s vision.
“Denae’s drooling,” whispered Tori. “She says Luke’s the hunkiest hunk she ever did see.”
“Looks like he’s taken,” growled James.
Tori pressed against his arm. “Don’t believe everything you see.”
“Right.” Because that made a ton of sense. Lauren had been pushing James away for a year or two. Was it because she’d been in a long-distance relationship with Luke Torrington all this time? He didn’t want to think that of her, but it only made sense. She was a stunning, vibrant woman. She was plenty good enough to catch the eye of a Manhattan millionaire. James had heard rumors of the small-town boy making it big.
“She’s not in love with Luke.”
James leaned away from his sister, finally managing to look toward the bandstand instead of the gate. “You can’t know that.”
“I do know.”
“I think... whatever we thought we knew, wasn’t all the truth.” The realization bashed him like a sledgehammer. He’d thought he knew Lauren. Obviously, he hadn’t. At all. If she had her sights set on a guy like Luke, there was no hope for James. He was a cowboy, for heaven’s sake. He hadn’t made a fortune in finance or in anything else. He all but lived with his parents and hadn’t ventured out of western Montana in years. Whatever else was true, he wasn’t in Luke Torrington’s league. If Lauren wasn’t on the guy’s arm, James would totally be fine with his own choices. But glitz had won the girl. James’s girl.
The furious jealousy plummeted into depressing, mind-numbing reality. The thought of sitting here with his friends listening to some stupid bluegrass band and pretending to celebrate his nation’s birthday repelled him.
He rose to his feet. “I’m sorry. I’m going back home.”
His friends stared up at him, eyes wide, mouths open. Maybe they said something. He didn’t know. Couldn’t hear over the pounding in his skull.
Tori hopped up. “I’m coming, too.”
“No need.”
“What’s going on?” asked Cheri.
James strode away, thankful for other exits from the fairgrounds, even though it meant going the long way around to get to his truck. Didn’t matter. All that mattered was getting out of here, saddling Jigsaw, and going for a run. Yeah, it would be dark soon. Who cared? The mare knew her way, and the moon would rise eventually.
He had some thinking to do. Maybe some yelling at God. Maybe even a few tears.
* * *
After seeing James stride out of the fairgrounds at the farthest gate from the parking area, Tori jogging behind him, Lauren knew she’d blown it, but what was she supposed to do now? Desert Luke, run after James, and make a scene? She might’ve done just that if her mother hadn’t spoken right then, pulling her attention. When she next looked, James and Tori had disappeared.
Luke guided her to a quilt his dad had spread for the four of them, thankfully a long distance from where Carmen and Cheri watched with curious expressions. Kade’s arms were crossed below a scowling face. The others stared.
Trying to swallow the lump in her throat, Lauren sat angled away from them. She’d make it up to them — everyone — later. At least, if they let her. Most important was James. Only a few hours before, she’d spouted talk of God’s will at Luke. Now she had to wonder if she’d blindly obeyed her mother when her heart said otherwise. Had she asked the Lord for guidance? Her heart sank. Not really.
She’d blown it. Again. Maybe this time for good.
The band struck up. Guitars, fiddles, banjos. Guys with long hair and tight jeans who didn’t have half the voice James did. Couldn’t play as well.
Lauren longed for the evening to be over. She felt trapped. Maybe James had, too. Maybe that’s why he escaped. She could take a break at intermission and visit her friends, but she wasn’t ready for all the accusations they’d fling her way, all the explanations they’d refuse to hear. She could excuse herself to the restroom and keep walking, but not in these heels. Not the mile or two back to the condo. Although maybe Denae would come get her if she asked.
Instead, she smiled at something Luke said and tried not to notice Wyatt’s arm braced behind her mother as they laughed together.
Survival. That was tonight’s only goal. Tomorrow things would look better. They had to.
* * *
These weren’t the fireworks James had planned to view tonight. Pain shot through him and hammered his head as he lay on his back staring up into the darkness. What kind of an idiot galloped his horse at night, when neither could see where they were going?
He’d taken Jigsaw out on Creighton Road. The smooth blacktop should have been safe enough. Definitely a better choice than a mountain trail with roots and rocks. All had been well until... what had spooked the mare?
It hurt to think, but a vague memory of a full spread of owl wings whooshing right over his head presented itself. Jigsaw had reared in panic. James had been too shocked, too distracted to keep his seat.
He hurt everywhere.
Where was his horse? He rolled over and pushed himself to sitting. His head swam, and the fireworks crescendoed. “Jigsaw?”
Silence and darkness. Great. How was he going to get home? He flexed one arm slowly, then the other. Rotated his shoulders. So far, so good. Gingerly, he stretched his left leg and caught his breath. Wow, that ankle hurt. He traced the joint with his hands. It seemed at the correct angle. The right leg was okay.
Fine. He needed to get upright and figure out where he was. He’d turned around a fe
w miles up the road. Was he anywhere near the new building site or Meg and Eli’s? If so, he might have coverage. He patted his shirt pocket, thankful he kept it snapped over his phone.
One bar. Who to call? Tori would scold him like a mother hen. His brother-in-law was likely the closest and least judgmental. James tapped Eli’s number.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Lauren hurried into the clinic the next morning, juggling her purse and her coffee. Finally, the horrible holiday weekend was over, and life would get back to normal, or at least as close as possible with her partner dating her mother. She gave her head a quick shake, trying to dislodge last night’s images. A full round of calls would keep her mind off James until evening, and then she’d figure out what to do and how to do it.
If he were talking to her at all.
No. She pushed the thought out of her mind as the phone rang and Milly answered it.
“Saddle Springs Veterinary. Milly speaking.” The receptionist mouthed good morning at Lauren. “Oh, no! I’m sorry to hear that. I can send one of the vets out right away. I believe Doctor Yanovich is most familiar with Jigsaw.”
Jigsaw? James’s horse? Lauren set the coffee cup down on the divider with a thud. No matter how tightly she tuned in, she couldn’t make out the caller’s voice. Her mind buzzed as Milly finished up the call and set the receiver down.
“That was Amanda Carmichael out at the Flying Horseshoe. I didn’t catch exactly what happened, but Jigsaw got out somehow and came back this morning limping. Do you mind checking her out?”
“I’m on my way.” Her coveralls and medical bag lived in the back of the Wrangler. All that was needed was her. She grabbed her coffee and jogged out to the Jeep.
The Flying Horseshoe yard was quiet for the day after a major holiday. Maybe everyone was out on a trail ride or something. A quick scan didn’t reveal James or Tori, so she headed to the stable.
The Cowboy’s Mixed-Up Matchmaker Page 16