by Kate Stewart
I sat up when he turned to leave me and felt the emotion come back tenfold. I covered my face with my hands and sobbed as I sat in the chair, terrified of what he would think, but at the same time not giving a damn. It hit me so suddenly; I had no choice but to let go. Rhys picked me up, sat me on his lap, and held me closely to his chest, stroking my back as I cried. I don’t know how long it took for me to get it out, a minute or an hour, but he held me, pressing his lips to my forehead repeatedly. When I pulled away from him, I caught his eyes and saw the man I once had a chance with. He was still in there. He wiped the sides of my face and brought his lips to mine briefly.
We got dressed by candlelight, neither of us saying a word. I could tell he wanted to talk, that he had something he wanted to say, and I gave him an earnest look, hoping it was welcoming. The sex was incredible, we were amazing together, and this distance just felt…wrong. He watched me walk to the door and I turned back to him to give him one last chance, but he stayed silent. I walked out more sated and freed than I’d ever felt in my life. The only sadness left in the room was held in the gray eyes of the man who had truly freed me through pleasure and pain.
I stayed busy working and finishing the honey-do list around my house that Alex never bothered to get to. I hung shelves, raked leaves. Things that other people dreaded, I now looked forward to. I was completely independent. My mother would be proud. She always told me men weren’t a necessity for any woman. When Alex and I had moved into this house and found the movers had left the couch in the center of the room and Alex was nowhere to be found, she picked up one end, gesturing for me to get the other.
“Leave it, Mom. We need a man to take care of that.”
She walked over to me and firmly gripped my shoulders, pinning me with a seriousness I’d never seen.
“You don’t need a man for anything. Especially for something you can do yourself, do you hear me, Violet?” I nodded, not arguing with her, and picked up the end of the couch.
I painted my soon to be ex-husband’s old office and made it my own. It was progress.
I had found a small amount of normalcy and saw that I was losing the extra weight I had put on over the last year. My arms were leaner, firmer, and the small amount of pudge around my middle was disappearing.
I wouldn’t change a fucking thing.
Remembering Rhys’s words about my body made my chest heavy.
Rhys.
My heart squeezed. No matter how busy I kept myself, he was always in the back of my mind. Then thoughts of our last encounter would come flashing back. The room lit in a soft glow of orange, the feel of the leather chair, the scent of the oil, the sound of our moans mixed, all stayed with me.
He had raised my level of sexual awareness to the top in just over a month. I thought I would need a year to find out what I did and didn’t want, but in a short amount of time he had shown me a little of both.
But nothing was off limits when it came to him. I would do whatever he wanted. His pleasure was my aphrodisiac. It was him that I craved most.
I didn’t need a man. I wanted one. I wanted Rhys.
He doesn’t want you anymore, Vi.
I needed to accept it, I just couldn’t. And there was no way I could give him up. Not yet. Maybe our time was short. Maybe his intention was to end things. He said he was a relationship type of guy; maybe he would meet someone and end our sessions. That thought alone had me working longer hours, running in circles in my mind while I kept busy with my body. I would wait and endure his distance until I couldn’t do it anymore.
I just couldn’t give him up.
Brunch with my mother that Sunday proved to be a difficult task. I was anxious about the outcome of my divorce. I should have just taken the money. Being free of Alex would be the best part of it. Brunch with my mother had sounded like a good idea at the time. She had driven me to The Carmine House, a beautiful three-story mansion nestled in the heart of Carmine Plantation. It was my favorite place to dine, and on that particular day, I had no desire to appreciate it. I sighed looking over my menu.
“What is it, Vi? You haven’t said three words since I picked you up.” My mother leaned over the table, concern in her eyes.
“Nothing, really, Mom. Don’t worry,” I said, motioning for the waiter. I wanted a Bloody Mary and fast. I just wanted to enjoy this day with my mother, but for some reason, I couldn’t stop thinking about the gray-eyed man who had been punishing both my heart and body. I had two men fucking up my mojo. This was unacceptable.
“Mom, I’ll be honest. I’ve been seeing a man who is absolutely beautiful. He’s smart, funny, sexy as hell, and seems to have a good heart, but I’ve ruined my chances with him.” I closed my menu, my appetite gone, and took an olive from the Bloody Mary just set before me and popped it into my mouth.
“Well, what happened?” My mother was on the edge of her seat. I never gave her dirty details, but I had a feeling all through high school and college and even after, she lived vicariously through me. Having found my father at such a young age, she didn’t have the chance to really date around. Although she seemed content, she stayed curious. And she never pushed me for details, either.
“I lied about living with Alex.” I saw her about to comment and waved my hand quickly to interrupt her. “In my defense, we had only been dating a few weeks and Alex got really sick, delaying me ending it and making him leave. I should’ve done it sooner, but I screwed up.” I shook my head back and forth slightly and closed my eyes briefly. “He found out and was not happy.”
“Can’t start a relationship based on a lie, Violet.” I nodded, wondering why I told her in the first place. I’d condemned myself enough.
“The thing is, we didn’t know each other that well.” Only he’d had his fingers, lips, and mouth on every inch of my flesh.
“Well, did you apologize?” she asked as I noticed a familiar movement from the corner of my eye. I straightened in my chair when my eyes caught a glimpse of the rest of him. There was no mistaking my lover. He had an air of confidence about him. I could feel his presence. I took a long sip of my drink and watched him.
Rhys was being seated in the corner facing away from me. He was with an older couple. I sucked in a breath and my mother noticed my sudden intake of air.
“What is it, Violet?” I quickly averted my eyes, not wanting to give anything away. “Nothing, Mother. Yes, I apologized profusely and he wouldn’t accept.”
“Well, then,” she said, eyeing her menu, “his loss.”
“Yes, I guess so,” I replied, letting my eyes wander again as I held my menu high, covering my face. The couple smiled with apparent adoration on their faces at Rhys. These were his parents. My eyes widened when a very pregnant woman joined them, and I felt my chest fall as Rhys embraced her. I pulled out the straw and swallowed my drink in a few gulps, my face on fire.
Of course he had a wife. Why would he bring me to his home? She must have been out of town or something. We fucked in practically every room, where she lived, in her bed! He’d probably hid all of her clothes somewhere in the house. What an absolute piece of—
“Violet, if you are going to burn the man’s head off with your stare and murder him secretly with your assumptions, at least go over there and introduce yourself to his wife to be sure.” My mother, the absolute she-devil and epitome of an intuitive woman, could not only read me, but could read anyone. This is why I trusted her whole-heartedly with advice and…well, everything else.
She raised a brow at me. “I’m assuming that is the man you were speaking of?”
“He’s married. This can’t be happening.” I looked over to see Rhys putting his head to his wife’s full belly, sweetly rubbing his hand back and forth, the gesture of a man in love.
He’d just humiliated me for lying to him, given me the silent treatment, and made sure I’d paid with my body, though I really couldn’t argue that point.
I couldn’t stop the heat surging through my body.
Tempe
r, temper.
I would kill him, of that I was sure. I stood quickly, pointing to my empty Bloody Mary, and my mother nodded. I walked over as casually as I could, thankful for the vodka coursing through me.
You have the upper hand, Vi. You can do this!
“Hello, SIR!” I spouted in a melody, placed my hands on Rhys’s shoulders and squeezed quickly before removing them. Rhys stiffened in his chair, his head snapping to. I walked around so I was wedged between his parents’ seat and his so I had a full view of the table. He got his eyes from his mother, his build from his father. Both of them smiled at me with a small look of confusion. I looked to the devastatingly beautiful woman on Rhys’s right and smiled.
“Rhys, aren’t you going to introduce us?” his mother asked, shaking her head at her son. “I’m Irene and this is my husband, Hugh.” She held out her hand and I shook it with a smile as the Bloody Mary made its way back up to my chest and lingered.
“Violet Hale,” I said, extending my hand, noting Rhys’s jaw twitch in reaction to my maiden name, “it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
His mother shook it sweetly and I accepted Hugh’s hand as well before moving it toward the woman next to him, smiling as my heart beat in my throat.
“Heidi Volz,” she said, reaching out her hand.
Oh God, he is married!
“Nice to meet you, Heidi! Rhys never told me he was married, but we’d just met in passing, anyway.” I was leaving and fast. I didn’t care that violence wasn’t the answer. I couldn’t take it, not from Rhys. I could just picture the massacre now.
“No—” she laughed “—not his wife. His unwed, knocked up sister. I’m the black sheep. Thankfully, he has two of us. At least she made the family proud.” She caught her mother’s glare and I laughed a little too harshly at the exchange, letting the ten tons of relief fall away from me.
I’d not bothered to look at Rhys fully until that moment, and what I saw was surprise and anger.
“Rhys, a quick word?” I didn’t give him time to answer before addressing his parents and sister. “I know how rude this seems, but do you mind if I steal him for a minute? I’ll be quick.”
“Of course.” His sister beamed and his parents agreed easily.
The nervous laughter that bubbled in my chest was almost too much, but I maintained. Rhys got up from his seat and started walking toward the French doors that led to a wraparound porch. He only hesitated when he realized he looked absurd leaving me in the dust and turned and smiled, waiting. His sister winked at me as if to say “Go get him.” I had a feeling they were close. I winked back, taking Rhys’s offered arm. We walked out onto the porch to a beautiful but chilly fall day. He pulled his arm away, walking toward the railing. The Spanish moss covered trees swayed in the cool breeze. There was a green field ahead with a butterfly garden. It was absolutely beautiful. Rhys stood looking at the view in front of the porch rail, his back to me. I stayed silent as long as I could. He gave me nothing.
“Rhys, come on, just talk to me—”
“You think this is funny?” He was beyond angry. I had just poked the bear, and at this point, I didn’t give a shit.
“Yes, I do,” I said defiantly, a smirk on my lips.
“This is over, as of now.” I stopped my walk toward him and had to fight to keep my wits. The feeling of rejection was so familiar now, I couldn’t escape the pain of it. Instead of filling me with despair, it angered me.
“Fine, throw me away just like my husband did. Fuck you both.” He turned slowly, pinning me with his stare. I stopped with my hand on the door behind me. He was angry but he wanted me, just as much as I wanted him. I was sure of it.
“You want me. I can see it. You can hide behind your words and turn your back on me all you want, but you want me.” I crossed my arms. Still, he gave me nothing. “He was my damn husband, Rhys. I’d given up a long time ago. What you saw wasn’t what it looked like. But I lied. I get that. So if you are going to end it, end it. But don’t look at me like that and tell me you don’t want me and that this is over. Clearly there is something here.” I gestured between us.
“That’s my family you introduced yourself to, Violet,” he snapped, holding a finger up in the direction of his table.
I took a step forward, narrowing my eyes. “And what? I’m not good enough to meet your mother? Besides, it was the only way to get you alone. I’ve never met a man so relentless in his pursuit to turn away from someone so quickly.”
“I have a bad history with liars,” he said, holding his hands up, frustration on his face.
“I lied, and you’ve crucified me for it.” I took a deep breath. “Fine, we are no longer more than fucking, you’ve made that clear. I’ll accept that now, but can we at least be civil or are you going to act like a damn child much longer? Because if not, I can’t deal with this animosity. If it doesn’t bother you that we won’t be together more intimately, you shouldn’t be holding such a grudge.”
“What do you want, Violet? And just what do you consider civil?” He took a step toward me. “You see I can’t be civil around you because all I want to do is fuck your mouth, lick your pussy, and pound my dick into you so hard that you forget to fucking breathe.” He made quick strides toward me. My legs trembled knowing what he was capable of. I couldn’t hide my arousal. He watched my resolve crumble as he stood a foot away.
“You are a lot of talk, baby.” He lifted his hand and wrapped his fingers around my wrist to test my pulse point. “But you aren’t in charge here, are you? Your heart is beating so fucking fast for me. I bet that pussy is pulsing with my every word. Don’t corner me, sweetheart, and demand anything. You get what I give. It’s my cock that fills you, my lips and tongue that make you scream, not your husband’s. I already own your body. I don’t need anything else.”
His words stung. I was his toy. He was supposed to be mine. I just had to accept it.
“I told you he’s gone, Rhys. My husband is gone. HE. IS. GONE. And screw you for thinking I’m not good enough to be introduced to your family.” I turned away from him but he held my wrist.
“Stop it, you know damn well I don’t think that of you. I was bombarded. You are married, Violet. It isn’t right. Do you think they buy the fact that we are friends? You are so fucking beautiful—” He stopped himself, his emotion taking hold as he looked down at the porch between us.
“I miss you,” I said. “I’ve spent so much time thinking about you, I don’t even know if I was beginning to fall for you or who I thought you might be. I just wanted another chance. And now I’ve embarrassed myself...again.” He hadn’t let go of my wrist, his eyes reaching mine the moment I said I missed him.
“Violet, this isn’t just about me and what I want. My family—”
I yanked my wrist away and glared at him, my resolve coming back in waves. “You know what, Rhys? You want to punish me, go right the fuck ahead. I love every single punishment you deal out. That was the purpose of all of this, anyway. You’re right. I am dripping and I’m dying for a shot at that cock, but I don’t need to be judged and dismissed. You keep that shit to yourself. I’ll be your sub when I’m supposed to. But out here, in the world of people like Alex, this bitch will dish it out as much as she takes it. Good day, sir. Have your cock text me. If not, it’s not the only cock in the world.”
Fury, fire, possessiveness, all of those things flooded his eyes instantly. He wasn’t done with me. If I didn’t have his heart’s attention, I had his dick’s.
With that, I walked into the restaurant. Seconds later, he grabbed my arm in a friendly gesture as he walked with me. “Who are you here with, Violet?” I looked to see amusement in his face as my face paled. “My mother,” I said completely confused.
“Well then, let’s meet Mommy and tell her what her little girl has been up to.” I studied his face, but he gave nothing away. I began to panic. “Rhys, you wouldn’t,” I said, terrified.
“Of course I wouldn’t,” he whispered deviously.
/> “Mother, this is Rhys Volz, a friend of mine,” I said quickly and loudly before Rhys could introduce himself. Terror crept up my spine as I thought of the thousand things he could say or insinuate in front of a woman who knew everything about me intuitively. Like the day I started my period, the first time I snuck out, even the first time I had sex. I used to think she had a camera in my room and a tracking device in my car. The fact was the woman could have been a spy, and a damn good one.
My mother spit out a small amount of her drink but recovered quickly. She stood slowly and grabbed his hand. “I can see why my daughter fancies you.” I turned bright red and looked at Rhys who shook her hand and smiled, releasing it slowly.
“Your beautiful daughter was just telling me about her husband, Alex.” He snickered and my mother caught it.
“Oh dear, Mr. Volz, I sure hope she did tell you the truth on how she kicked that piece of shit out of their home for cheating a few weeks back.” I stiffened as Rhys stood there in shock before laughing loudly, drawing attention to us. He gave me a wondering glance and I could tell then he forgave me just a little. I sat down, red faced, and grabbed my watered down Bloody Mary.
“Come to think of it, Mrs...?”
“Hale, darlin’,” she said smartly.
“Mrs. Hale, she did mention it.” He looked over to his table. “Ladies, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get back to my family. Enjoy your brunch. You should try the buttered lobster. I’m told it’s quite good.” He winked at my mother, kissed my wrist, and was gone.
Touché, Rhys.
“Holy hell, Violet, he makes Alex look like the garbage man.”
“I know, Mom,” I said with a sigh.
“Good Lord, I need another drink.” She fanned herself with her hand and I just shook my head. If she only knew what the man could do with ten minutes and his tongue—okay, five...hell, three.
“That’s the kind of man that would make you happy, Vi.”