Tossing his journal aside, she knew she’d come back to it later, if for no other reason than to feel the cadence of his thoughts. She moved to the case files and set them side by side, trying to tell which was the correct folder to start with. The final one she touched was marked “General Details,” which seemed like as good a place to start as any.
The paper had begun to discolor with age, although everything was still clearly legible and well-ordered. There were crime scene photos that included Post-its with his notes pointing out peculiarities that caught his eye. Ellie spent a couple of hours looking at his records in relation to the photos and then trying to figure out if her eyes would have caught the same things.
She read his typed notes about specific cases, wondering why arrests were not made, warrants were not approved, and then, in later examples, why agents seemed to leave duty after working on them—some by retiring, some with injuries, and some with a letter written to their widow explaining how the Bureau appreciated the years of service their loved one had given. Ellie couldn’t decide if the connections were as obvious in reality, or if it was just that she tended to believe everything that her father said, but it seemed clear to her now that someone high up in the Bureau was manipulating the outcome of certain cases.
Occasionally, it appeared as though it was to protect the accused, who was most likely guilty of the crime, but there were copies of partner reassignments and case redistributions that resolved in an agent being forced out of service. The manner in which things had been manipulated were similar enough that she was beginning to conclude her father was not only onto something, but was closing in on who was to blame and why.
Unfortunately, despite all the evidence he had compiled, the one thing he had not included was a tidy little memo summing up his thoughts. Ellie truly wished he had scribbled, “Director X is killing off agents or getting them pushed out whenever they get too close to seeing what he is doing.” Without that kind of clarity, she was forced to assume he didn’t know for certain, but had narrowed it down to three agents, two of which had worked in Virginia, and one who had led the west coast divisions.
The only folder she hadn’t reviewed yet was information on the final undercover assignment he’d gone on that had led to his death. Just as she was pulling the elastic band off the binder, the door creaked open and Janice appeared with a wooden tray in her hands.
“Don’t mind me,” she announced in a quiet voice. “I saw you hadn’t touched your tea and snack from earlier, so I thought I’d bring you something that was sure to tempt you into eating.”
There on the bamboo tray in her mother’s hands was a burger from the local dive she and Anne used to go to every chance they had. For the most part, Ellie ate healthy food, but a good, greasy burger was definitely a weakness, and nobody made them better than Freddy’s Drive-in. A quick glance at the tray showed that not only was there a bacon cheeseburger made just the way she liked it—with mayo, barbecue sauce, and grilled onions and mushrooms—but there was also an order of their curly fries with creamy horseradish sauce to dip them in and a tall Styrofoam cup, which Ellie suspected contained a dark chocolate malted milkshake. She felt like a child when the grin came over her face, but it had been a couple of years since she’d had a full treatment from Freddy’s Drive-in.
Janice brought the tray over and set it on an end table next to the sofa where Ellie had spread everything out. Ellie was still enjoying the general smell of the treat in front of her when her mother’s whole demeanor changed.
“What are you doing with these files?”
“Mom, you aren’t cleared to see these,” Ellie chastised, uncertain as to why Janice was acting so worried. “You know what my job entails. The fact that I’m looking at unsettling photos shouldn’t be surprising.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Janice chided her. “I know what you do, and even though I don’t think it’s suitable, I still have the good sense to know what’s involved. But these were your father’s files. Why do you have them?”
“How did you know these were Dad’s?” Ellie asked, unaware that Janice knew anything about her father’s work.
“He had a special way of notating things,” she answered, pointing to one of his Post-it notes. “And Elliot and I had a long conversation a couple of weeks before his death. He wanted me know there was a greater than likely chance he wouldn’t make it, and although he forbade me from trying to push you out of what you were doing, he wanted me to discourage you from trying to figure out exactly what happened to him. He said it could end with me having to bury you both.” She rested her left hand over her heart when she finished talking and then turned it back on Ellie to ask, “How did you get these, and what are you trying to do?”
Ellie grabbed the milkshake and took a long draw, realizing it was even better than she remembered. Finally, she looked back up at her mother and then pointed to a chair, indicating she should sit down. It took a while, but Ellie spelled out the details of the mysterious packages and the safety deposit box. Janice listened in silence, something Ellie couldn’t remember ever occurring when she tried to talk to her mother. When she finished catching her mom up on the occurrences that led up to her doorstep appearance, she pointed to the documents scattered on the tabletop and said, “So I’m just trying to figure out what Dad left and why he thought it was so important for me to have it now.”
“He wanted you to have it so you could protect yourself.” Janice had spoken as though she was certain of the truth of her words.
“Did he?” Ellie wasn’t so sure. “He brought me three-fourths of the way down a rabbit hole, only to tell me not to come down here?”
“When you put it like that, it sounds ridiculous,” Janice replied. “But he was adamant that you shouldn’t try to look into his death.”
“I’m not,” Ellie argued, correcting her mother’s assumption. “I know he died because one of these three men basically put him in a situation where he couldn’t survive. They blew his cover, and as a result, he was killed. I’m just trying to figure out how this knowledge impacts me.”
“How do you think it impacts you?” Janice almost sounded worried.
Ellie thought about the question for a few minutes before answering. “I’m pretty sure the two guys on the east coast have retired in the last couple of years, so I don’t think it matters. Now, this guy might still be active in California. I don’t think I’ve ever been in contact with him, so I don’t see how it could affect me, even if he was still with the Bureau.”
“So you aren’t trying to go after anybody to avenge your father?” Janice asked.
That idea made Ellie laugh out loud. “Mom, on my best day, I’d admit to being an FBI agent, but I’m not some kind of mercenary gun-for-hire willing to take out the people who have done some kind of injustice. I’m a geek in the basement. I don’t work in the field, and even though the idea of someone intentionally hurting Dad makes me want to shoot someone, he raised me better than that.” When Ellie said the last bit, she saw the brief look of hurt on her mother’s face, causing her to quickly add, “You both raised me better than that.”
Janice huffed, “You always were your father’s daughter more than you were mine. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have my uses.”
Feeling the need to offer an olive branch, she picked up the journal she’d tossed aside earlier, opened it to the next to last page, and pointed to a note.
Janice shook her head and explained, “I don’t have my glasses on. What does it say?”
Ellie smiled, remembering that her mother needed to wear corrective lenses to read, but was too vain to keep them on her all the time. “It’s a reminder to pick up an anniversary gift for you when he got back into town.”
Janice smiled softly and glanced to the windows at the back of the room, which were dark and threatening-looking now that the sun had set. “He never forgot an anniversary.”
“Why?” Ellie couldn’t stop herself from asking.
“We were
married, Ellie. Why do you think?” Janice challenged.
“Am I the only one who realized you two could barely stand to be in the same room together and rarely saw each other, even when I was being passed between you?”
“Those are the daily details,” Janice said, blowing off her limited explanation of their situation. “There was a time when your father and I loved each other very much. Just because we couldn’t get along anymore didn’t mean those feelings went away.”
“Did you get him anniversary gifts?” Ellie asked, trying to point out the ridiculousness of what Janice was saying.
Unexpectedly, her mother stood up and brushed some non-existent lint off her dress slacks before replying, “Every year, Ellie. I gave him a present without fail every single year when we met at the same restaurant to celebrate. I don’t expect you to understand, but your father and I had an arrangement we both appreciated. It wasn’t traditional, and I suppose it was difficult for you on a certain level, but it made us happy.”
“I might understand if you explained it to me,” Ellie said in an attempt to get some more information.
A brief smile passed over Janice’s face before it faded and she shook her head. “No, you wouldn’t understand it any better if I explained it, because I hardly understood it myself.” Then she looked back over the sofa and the table, completely covered with papers. “You are so much like your father. Promise me you’ll be careful so you don’t end up like him as well.”
She couldn’t explain what made her say it, but before she could approve the disclosure, her mouth blurted out, “There’s a guy who’s interested in dating me. He knows about my job and a lot of my crazy habits, and he still seems to think I’m worth getting to know better.”
“Where does he work?” Janice asked, slipping back into the persona Ellie more identified with her mother.
“He owns a successful coffee shop,” Ellie said, wondering if she was just shooting herself in the foot by offering this information.
“And he understands what it is that you do?” Janice seemed skeptical.
“He should... It was his cousin that introduced us, and his cousin works at the Bureau and lives across the hall from me,” Ellie explained.
“You know...” Janice seemed happier than Ellie could remember seeing her in some time. “I think if you’ve gotten most of your work done tonight, then tomorrow, I can have Jose get to work on you. If we get your hair and maybe your makeup touched up, then you can stop by to see this young man on your way home. If he thought he was interested in asking you out before, once he gets a look at you all fixed up, he won’t know what hit him.”
“I’m not sure he’s someone I’d want to hit,” Ellie warily offered.
Janice wasn’t put off by Ellie’s lack of enthusiasm. “Trust me. Every man wants to be hit by a woman. They prefer being slightly dazed and confused, even if they won’t admit it.”
Ellie couldn’t figure out how that could possibly be true, but she also recognized she didn’t have enough dating experience to fully dispute it, either. She opted for a bite of cheeseburger and decided for whatever reason, she and her mom were getting along at the moment, and it wasn’t worth ruining the best meal she’d had in a long time to question her mother’s advice.
Chapter Eleven
Ellie stood and stretched, amazed at how full she felt. “I’m pretty sure I’m going to regret eating all that cake,” she admitted to Anne, who didn’t appear to have the energy to get up from her chair, but was managing to lick the last bit of frosting off her fork.
“Me, too,” Anne agreed, “but at the moment, I’m too fat and well-fed to care.”
The last two hours had given Anne and Ellie a chance to catch up and polish off a double chocolate layer cake from Pepperidge Farm. Anne’s boys had gone out with their father to a local football game, which gave the women a chance to reminisce without interruption.
“Are you going to be okay?” Anne asked, switching the mood back to a more serious one.
“Of course,” Ellie assured her. “Besides, I’ve got some work to do to be sure that if you get the call to describe me one day, you can make me sound like the life of the party.”
“Are you in a position that makes you think I’ll get a call like that?” Anne asked, concerned.
“No,” Ellie quickly promised. “Maybe I’ll get some kind of award and the local paper will want to do a personal interest story on me, so you’ll get hit up for some background information on that.”
“Maybe...” Anne twirled strands of her light hair around her finger, not appearing to believe what her old friend was saying.
“You know, when you do that, I can see some gray beginning to appear,” Ellie teased, needing to keep Anne from worrying about her and hoping she could distract her. Despite the fact that her job required her to deal with death on a regular basis, Ellie considered Anne to have by far the more stressful life and wasn’t surprised that her friend was beginning to have a few well-earned gray hairs.
“Don’t think that just because we’ve been friends for more than twenty years that I won’t mark you off my Christmas card list with a Sharpie,” Anne replied, pretending to be insulted by her comment.
Ellie laughed and then glanced at the clock on the wall, announcing it was time for her to hit the road. She only had a twenty-minute drive ahead of her, but after working through the files for Agent Peters yesterday morning, talking through her work and the files from her father with Janice last night, and now examining her life at length with Anne, she felt like she’d gotten a handle on some things and was ready to get home and start trying to live a little more.
She decided that she didn’t need to look into what happened with her father any further. When she got home, she was going to hide the files for safekeeping, but she would no longer pore over them. His personal journals she would probably look through some more, just because it felt like spending time with him and she missed her dad enough that any kind of contact with the man who’d loved her unconditionally was welcome.
After letting Janice talk her into seeing Jose at the salon early that morning, Ellie was sporting some subtle layers in her newly highlighted hair, which Janice seemed to think totally transformed her face and brought out her eyes. Ellie wasn’t sure what her hair had to do with her eyes, but with it down and styled so well by Jose, she did have to admit it looked nice.
The time with Anne had helped her to relax and remember what it was like to laugh and joke with a friend. Over the last few years, Ellie had begun to stay home more often, and it felt like she’d been living for work alone recently. Being reminded that there were people who enjoyed hanging out with her was a welcome revelation.
She said goodbye to Anne and got back on the highway to drive home. Janice had promised that Joe would appreciate the new hairstyle, and it was time to see if her mother knew what she was talking about.
When she walked in, there were three young boys sitting at the bar along the window who all gave her a quick once-over. She’d be lying if she didn’t admit that being noticed gave her the courage to walk straight over to Joe’s office and knock three times before putting her hands in her back jeans pockets to keep her from knocking again or fidgeting.
The door to the office pulled open, and the Goth girl that seemed to be a fixture here walked past her, looking slightly upset. Before Ellie could ask if everything was all right, the coffee girl disappeared, and Joe cleared his throat behind her, causing Ellie to turn quickly and almost elbow him in the stomach. He caught her nearly weaponized funny bone and was sporting a smile by the time Ellie’s eyes worked up to his face.
“What brings you here?” he asked, not looking the least bit upset to have her appear at his shop.
“Would you believe I was in the neighborhood?” Ellie joked, wondering why she was teasing him in return instead of telling him the truth.
“I would if I hadn’t known you were on vacation,” Joe replied, letting her know she’d been the topic of c
onversation at some point while she’d been out of town.
Usually, the idea of being discussed behind her back irritated her, but even with the thought that it could just be the influence of the chocolate cake, she felt warm. “I literally just got back. I had a big dinner, so I was thinking how nice it would be to have a hot drink before heading home, and before I knew it, I was here.”
“A big dinner?” Joe repeated, raising an eyebrow, as though he doubted something.
Once she’d nodded to confirm that was what she’d said, he reached out slowly and pinched something off her shirt near her collarbone. He grinned after he looked at it closely and then explained his amusement. “I’m assuming chocolate is considered a food group all its own, then.”
“I said I had a big dinner. I never said it was healthy,” she clarified, realizing she’d been busted and not feeling the least bit guilty about it. She’d loved every bite of that cake, and since she knew she’d be running most of it off in the morning, now that the slight feeling of nausea was gone, she had nothing to regret.
“Come on. I’ll get you something to be sure you stay settled.”
As was his custom, Joe pushed the door to, but didn’t completely close it, and then moved to his big machine, where Ellie studied him carefully to see what kind of concoction he’d whip up for her this time.
She was confused and a little disappointed when he put a tea bag in a mug and added some hot water to it. “Do you take a half sugar in your tea as well?” he asked, letting her know just how much he knew about her already.
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