by Deb Caletti
As is generally true, it’s a very unquiet scream. And that’s when things go from bad to worse. A voice, that skin-crawling and terrifying voice, comes booming across the land.
“Needleman! Is that you? Where have you gone?” Vlad Luxor shouts. “I want to catch a big marlin! I want to put his body on a wall and his chewy flesh on a cracker! You know I like success at whatever I do!”
The children go still. They stop squirming and fighting and protesting, because true evil can halt you right in your tracks, like a boot smashing a bug.
Henry’s afraid to look. He knows Vlad Luxor is coming closer, though, because that voice gets louder. “A giant fish on a hook!” he shouts. “With bulging eyes and a huge, wriggling body, and a mouth gasping for breath!”
Henry can feel the other children trembling next to him. He feels the ribbed cave of Button’s chest go still. They’ve all turned cold with terror. He can’t imagine what horrible thing might happen next.
Henry peeks and sees the swoop of Vlad Luxor’s hair, and his hangy jowls, and the dull flash of his yellowed teeth. He strides toward them, slowed by a pair of high, rubbery hip waders, which make an unnerving squeak squeak sound as he walks. “Needleman! Where’s my hat! Don’t I need a lucky hat? Every fisherman has a lucky hat that makes you catch fish!”
A Lucky Hat That Makes You Catch Fish
The rope cinches tighter. Jo lets out a little moan of dread. In a moment there he is, Vlad Luxor, right in front of them. Henry can feel Vlad Luxor’s hot breath, which smells like canned mussels and yesterday’s coffee, and he sees the hard yellow shells of Vlad Luxor’s fingernails on his red fleshy hands. Henry’s sure he has only a few seconds left before he’s turned into something horrible, so he closes his eyes and hopes his grandfather knows how much he loves him.
“What’s this?” Vlad Luxor says, kicking Henry’s shoe with the toe of his fat rubber boot. “Who are you?”
Henry opens his mouth. He wishes and wishes he could use his voice in some strong way, but no sound comes out.
“A group of . . . workers,” Needleman says. “Loyal workers. Youth for Vlad! Here to serve.”
“Yes, yes, of course. Wonderful.” Vlad Luxor lifts his globby chin and angles his head to get a better look at them. “Wait.”
And then he reaches out. He grabs Henry’s narrow face and tilts it up so that Henry is oh so horribly staring straight at him. “They look familiar,” he says. He lowers his brows menacingly. “They look like particular children, Needleman. I can’t put my finger on it.” Vlad’s hard nails jab into Henry’s cheeks as he turns Henry’s head this way and that to study him.
“Oh, no, no, no! Not particular at all!” Needleman is speaking rapidly, and he’s gesturing like a windmill at top speed. “Just a few of your many young fans. Here to lend a helping hand at the magnificent festivities tonight.”
Vlad Luxor looks directly into Henry’s eyes, and Henry has no choice but to look back. And this is very difficult to explain, because you have likely never seen such a thing yourself, but Vlad Luxor’s eyes look dead, as if there is no true human being there at all, and even his voice seems flat and wrong and false, as if anyone real inside his body has gone missing. And yet, Vlad Luxor blinks, and Henry can feel the blop blop of Vlad Luxor’s pulse in his fingers, and his putrid breath puffs in and out. Henry shudders; a chill goes down to the center of his bones, because Vlad Luxor is like an empty ghost who is still very much alive.
“Well, then. Get happily to work for me!” he says. “And get me that hat, Needleman. I’ll be down at the river catching a marlin big enough to mount on my wall. Dead decorative animals show my glorious power.”
Vlad’s hip waders squeak squeak as he turns, and the ground shudders. Henry can still feel the pressed indentations of Vlad Luxor’s fingers in his face.
“Get them out of here!” Needleman hisses. “Lock them up. I’ll deal with them as soon as I can. And no funny business from you, brats. Every move you make, every breath, every blink, every burp—I’ll be watching you.”
And with that, in a tangle of feet and a huddle of bodies, the spy shoves them toward that lodge, where the smoke curls like a dark question mark toward the sky.
CHAPTER 24
The Surprise in the Trophy Room
The spy pushes and wrangles the bundle of children through the tall doors of the lodge. Inside, a huge wood hall leads to an even more immense room with an enormous fireplace crackling with a warm fire, which leads to another immense room with the largest and longest table you can imagine. There are delicious smells, too, and workers are bustling about, and it’s all somewhat wonderful even though it’s an awful place, because the children have been out in the cold for two days and one long night and haven’t eaten anything since they had the last of Apollo’s Luscious Lime Pockets. Beside him, Henry hears Pirate Girl’s stomach growl.
The spy shoves them through each room, grumbling and muttering, Not here, not here, because there are people everywhere, polishing and tidying, gathering platters and trays, and setting the table with large iron plates and tall iron goblets. He heads to a pantry and opens the double doors, and Henry silently hopes they’ll be hidden there. Inside, Henry spots food beyond his wildest imagination: Oyster Jams and Jells. Beef Valentinos and Pork Valentinos and even Tofurkey Valentinos. Choco-Blintz Nuggets, cans of Peach Romblé and Brown Sugar Radish, and every other splendid thing you can think of, along with a yucky something or two (a large jar of Black Licorice Guzzles, ick). He sees four entire rows of canned vegetables. What extravagance!
What Extravagance
Unfortunately for the hungry children, one of Vlad’s workers is inside the pantry, perusing a shelf of boxed mixes for Vanilla Mond-du-fait. So, the spy shuts the doors quickly and shuttles them forward, past a large kitchen, where Henry can hear the sounds of sizzling butter and things frying. He sees one of the chefs open the oven and slide in a very familiar-looking platter. And this is difficult to say, and even harder for the children to witness, but those tiny, creepy feet are familiar, too. Jo lets out a sob.
“Mr. Reese!” Pirate Girl whispers.
“Oh no!” Henry whispers back. His heart breaks. The chef cranks the dial to the highest heat.
Now the children and Button, still tied together in their awful huddle, are thrust and jostled down another great wood hall. The spy opens a set of doors into a magnificent bedroom with high ceilings, where—ah, Henry can’t get a good look in. Someone’s there, too, so the spy moves on. Finally, he pokes his head into another magnificent, high-ceilinged room with no one in it. The spy shoves them inside and locks the door behind him.
They’re alone again. At least, they think so.
“It’s . . . a library,” Apollo says. “Or at least it was.” All the shelves have been emptied of books and are filled with trophies instead, decorated with golden Vlad Luxors in every size, and Henry can see the words FIRST, and CHAMPION, and WINNER, and BEST engraved on their plaques. There’s another fireplace in here, too, and it’s lit and warm, but hanging above the orange, crackling fire in the stone hearth, there’s a chilling sight.
A Chilling Sight
Jo’s noticed it, too. “Don’t look above the fireplace,” she says.
“Oh, that’s awful,” says Pirate Girl, looking above the fireplace.
“Don’t look on the wall across from it, either,” Henry says, which of course makes everyone turn and crane their necks in that direction. A deer head on one wall, and an elk head on another—Henry could cry for a million reasons.
“As if this day couldn’t get worse,” Apollo says.
But then something astonishing happens.
“Those poor children,” the elk on the wall says.
“All roped up like cattle,” the deer on the other wall says.
Henry is so shocked that he nearly steps on Jo
’s foot, and Button is so startled that she begins to growl, and then Pirate Girl says, “They speak!”
“Talking heads! How awful,” Jo says. “How did this happen to you?” It’s just like Jo to think of others even when she’s in dreadful trouble herself.
“We have no idea!” the talking elk head says. “The last thing I remember, I was standing in the lovely shade of my forest home. Suddenly, I found myself in another part of the world, in a beautiful house, and I said to myself, ‘This is not my beautiful house!’ I looked over and saw that deer on the wall, and I said, ‘That is not my beautiful wife!’ I asked myself, ‘How did I get here?’”
“Oh dear,” Jo says.
“Exactly,” the deer head says. “The same thing happened to me.”
“And now you have arrived,” the elk head says. “And I am guessing, although I don’t know for sure, that you are the spell brea—”
“Shh!” the deer head commands, causing the elk to shut his lips, pronto.
“Quite right,” the elk head says. “With only a head, I should be thinking much more clearly! You are, I assume, the children we’ve heard . . . whispers about?”
Even as that tight rope digs into Henry’s skin, and even as they are held captive in a madman’s lodge near the edge of the Wilds at the far side of Rulers Mountain, it’s quite remarkable to think that even the animals of the Timeless Province know about them.
“We are.” Apollo nods solemnly.
“We’re here to help a bully gerenuk,” Jo says.
“A bully, truly? Well, I’m assuming you have your reasons and it’s important business, or you wouldn’t have put yourself into the great danger you’re in now,” the elk says.
“We have to get out of here. Needleman will be back any minute, and there’s no telling what trouble the gerenuk will be getting into, especially with those hunters all around! And we’ve got to hurry because it’s getting quite late and tomorrow is Jo’s mother’s celebration of love,” Henry explains in a rush. For a moment, it’s like he read that book that’s advertised in the back of Amazing Stories magazine.
That Book That’s Advertised in the Back of Amazing Stories Magazine
“We can’t miss the celebration!” Jo cries. “My mom and Becky will cancel the whole thing if I’m not home soon.”
“And we’ll certainly miss it if Needleman . . .” Pirate Girl’s hands are bound, so she makes a face like she’s being strangled, her tongue lolling out the side of her mouth.
“We have to, um, put our heads together and think about what to do. With apologies to you both,” Jo says to the heads.
“No apology necessary,” the deer says. “The first order of business seems to be to get you free from that rope.”
“That seems completely and utterly impossible,” the elk says.
“It’s not. I’m already working on it.” Pirate Girl has somehow wiggled her fingers into her pocket, and she’s clutching her pocketknife. “The saw blade is really small, and it’s hard to cut anything at this angle . . . ,” she says, grunting with effort.
“You’re amazing, Pirate Girl,” Henry says.
“If anyone can do it, you can,” Jo encourages.
“If we manage to get free, what then?” Apollo says. “I’m sure that door is locked, and there’s only that one small window up there, with bars across it. How will we get out?”
“We have to find a way,” Pirate Girl says, sawing with all her might.
“Why is our HRM so intent on keeping others out and inners in?” the elk moans. “No one can get through those bars.”
“We’ll find some way out. But this place is crawling with workers,” Jo says.
“And as soon as the party begins, there’ll be even more.” Henry can’t imagine how they’ll escape, let alone escape without being seen.
“The party must be starting soon. It’s gotten noisier and noisier out there. And just before you arrived, that was delivered. We have no idea what it is. It took three workers to muscle it in.” The deer rolls her eyes toward an enormous wardrobe shoved against the wall.
“This is a very thick rope,” Pirate Girl moans. “But I think I almost—wait! It’s just about throu—”
“Needleman!” Vlad Luxor shouts, rattling the knob of the door at the exact moment that the rope slides from their bodies onto the ground. “I need you! I’m bored of fishing and I need a marlin NOW. The guests are beginning to arrive! Needleman, are you in here?”
CHAPTER 25
The Children Use Their Skills
Oh, it is the worst possible thing to happen, because the rope clatters down, and then there’s Vlad, popping into the room, causing a terrible commotion of fear and panic in their bodies. The talking heads go silent.
“Who are you? What are you doing in here?” Vlad booms as his chest expands to terrifying proportions. “My most special room is always locked! No one is allowed. And what is that nasty, messy rope doing in my beautiful, precious trophy room right before my magnificent party?”
“We’re Youth for Vlad,” Apollo squeaks.
Every spongy, magical, useful corner of Henry’s brain seems to have dried up and gone dark. He opens his mouth, and at first, nothing comes out. But then: a miracle. An idea. An idea plus bravery.
“We were just putting up this wall, sir.”
“Wall?” Vlad cocks his head, the way a bird does when he’s suddenly caught sight of you.
Henry lifts the rope. “This powerful wall. To keep others out. Out of your trophy room. A lock didn’t seem like enough for such a magnificent and marvelous place of tribute to you, sir.”
“Ah yes,” Vlad says. His big chest relaxes. “The more barriers, the merriers, I always say. Carry on.”
With that, he exits, and all the children exhale in relief, and even Button sighs through her nose, but then the door opens again.
“Wait! Is that what I think it is? The wardrobe of splendid, stylish costumes has arrived!” Vlad says. The children suck in their breath again. “I told them to lock it away in my most special room, since tonight, I myself will be the most glorious, shining trophy!”
No one dares make a move. Just when they thought they could breathe a sigh of relief, they’re unsafe again—a situation Henry is already familiar with. He knows that you sometimes have to make bravery last, the way you suck on a candy rather than crunching down. Vlad strides over to the wardrobe, flings open the doors, and removes hanger after hanger and trunk after trunk of elegant and somewhat flashy clothing—velvety vests and lacy leggings and satiny suits. He hmms and hahs his approval as many furs and minks and leathers begin to pile up. The deer and the elk heads blink with fear, as if the worst hasn’t already happened.
With a great weight of clothes over his arms, Vlad exits. The lock clicks into place again.
“Whew,” Jo says.
“It’s times like this that I am glad to be an other and not an inner, even if we are locked out,” Henry says.
Pirate Girl nods. “I know what you mean.”
“We have to get out of here, and fast,” Apollo whispers.
“We have a chance, now that Pirate Girl freed us with her wonderful pocketknife,” Henry says, and Pirate Girl beams.
“But how?” Jo asks. “I just wish Brenda and Eddie knew where we were. We need someone out there to help us in here.”
“It sounds like we have a window of opportunity, since Needleman has to catch a marlin. After all, marlin live far out at sea, not in rivers, and they’re fast, too, sometimes swimming sixty-eight miles per—”
“Window of opportunity!” Pirate Girl interrupts Apollo. “It’s our only way. Maybe we can wave our arms to show Brenda and Eddie where we are.”
“That window is high,” Apollo says. “And there isn’t even a chair in this room to stand on.”
“What about
those trunks and suitcases in that wardrobe?” the elk says. “You could stack them! They’re practically a ladder.”
Practically a Ladder
“You’re right!” Jo says, hurrying toward it. “Let’s see. Each of these trunks is about ten inches, and that window is about seven feet high, and . . . Seven times twelve, eighty-four inches, divided by ten equals eight and a bit less than a half, minus the head and shoulders of our climber . . . So that’s . . . seven trunks!”
The children run back and forth, stacking the suitcases, and Button runs back and forth, too, in encouragement and excitement. The trunks rise up, up, up, reaching as high as the children can manage on their toes and with their outstretched fingers.
As they stand back to look at it now, their ladder seems quite high and exceedingly wobbly.
“I’ll go,” Henry says.
“Are you sure?” Pirate Girl asks.
“I’m the smallest.” Henry carefully climbs from trunk to trunk. The higher he goes, the more rickety and swaying the suitcases get.
“Hold on to them!” Pirate Girl barks. “The trunks are slipping this way and that!”
“We’re trying!” Apollo says.
When he glances up, Henry worries that there aren’t enough trunks for him to reach the ledge, but of course, Jo has calculated perfectly.
“Whew!” he says. “I made it.”
“Yay, Henry!” Pirate Girl says. “Great job, Jo! Your math skills are the best!”
“Thanks, Pirate Girl!” Jo says, pleased. “What do you see out there, Henry?”
Well, he sees the last rays of afternoon light shining toward him, turning the tips of the evergreens golden and the edges of the sky a glowing orange. Even more important, though: “I see tower workers in fancy costumes, hurrying around.”