by Rue Volley
“Wow...okay,” I muttered. I pushed my chair out and headed for the door. I looked back, when I reached for the knob. “I'm waiting for Theodore on the porch… If I see the boogie man, I'll scream out k?”
I opened the door and slammed it behind me… I didn't care that I just acted my age. Not one bit. I sat down on the porch swing, my feet dangling over the side…not touching the floor. I looked out at the sunny day and pulled my black rock star shades out and put them on. I sighed…I should not have been so crappy about that…this was what my family consisted of now…this is all I have. I should be happy that I have anyone other than Kai who cares…I should, but I have my moments of suck, just like everyone.
******
I had my head lowered, and I heard a car pull up. I looked to see that black BMW…that I am so fond of. I got a grin on my face. It's Johnathan…thank god. He opened his door and stepped out looking amazing…to me anyway. His hair the right kind of messy, sunglasses...white shirt…torn jeans...pretty, and mine right? He grinned as he walked toward me, I guess I had a smile on my face too. He came up and sat on the swing next to me.
“Nice ears Rue,” he said.
228
“Thanks…evil teddy.”
“Mmmm…sounds like a bad movie,” he said, as he pushed his sunglasses up into his hair.
“Oh, I would say that an „evil teddy" movie, would be the best ever,” I said.
He put his hands out in front of him, to add to the theatrics… “Yea…okay lets see… „Evil Teddy" has been eating children and seducing teenage girls for years and when he became the town"s ice cream man he knew he finally had the vehicle, to lure them all…”
I laughed, interrupting his train of thought. “Of course he would be a pervert…
yea.”
“Well, of course…” He leaned over and got close to my face. I was still looking straight ahead. He whispered in my ear, “Do I need to dress up for you…? I don't mind fetishes, I mean…that's a little out there for me…but we could…”
I elbowed him and laughed. I looked at his face and he slid my sunglasses down to the tip of my nose, so he could see my eyes. My eyes told him to kiss me and he did.
“So Rue Volley, what"s the plan today...? Flashing through the woods, scaring all the woodland creatures, or maybe some, ya know, blade training...just normal stuff.” He had put his arm around me, I guess to reassure me that he was joking.
“Yea…no, I'm going to the library...nothing too exciting.”
He nodded. “Oh, Okay…sounds good.”
I looked over to him. “Really…? You"re cool with just hanging out at the library?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “Yea, why not?”
I had to think before I spoke. “Well…the library is just not a place I thought you'd want to go… Tell you the truth, I didn't know if I wanted to really go…but it's like riding a bike and wrecking. The longer I stay out of there, the more chance there will be, that I won't ever go.” I tried to muster up a convincing smile, but I know it was half assed, at best. “See the library was my first true love… We go way back.”
He took his arm off of me. “Oh, I see that I have some competition,” He said grinning.
I crossed my arms. “Maybe… There are a lot of romantic books stored there…or were, I guess Theodore has probably stocked it full, considering the other ones burned.” I stopped and thought about that...burned, in a fire...after my parents. I had to shake it off.
“Rue?”
I looked at him and he had a look of concern on his face. “Are you sure you"re ready to go there?”
“Yea…I am sure, I really am, it's like I have to. Truth is, I don't have the luxury of a cemetery.”
He cleared his throat, “Wow, Okay.”
I stood up and walked to the railing. “I know it sounds morbid Johnathan…No one has talked to me about it at all, but it lives here.” I pointed to my stomach. “I feel it everyday… I don't want too, but I do, and the only way I can even start to deal with it, is to go there, and stop acting like it doesn't exist.”
229
He pushed himself up, and I really didn't know how this thing I just dropped on him was going to effect him, but he said the most amazing thing he could have, all Johnathan style.
“I will be by your side no matter what you do, or don't want to do, always.”
I took my sunglasses off to look him in the eye. “I think you"re amazing Johnathan.”
He smiled...the smile you get for no other reason, but for the real reason, the happy one.
Josh opened the door and stepped out.
He immediately put his hands in the pockets of his jeans, which was a new habit of his. He looked at me and at the back of Johnathan's head.
“Hey,” he said, with no real emotion in his voice.
Johnathan turned to him… “Hey, Josh.”
“Theodore will be down in a minute… You guys doing this thing here, or what?”
Josh said.
Johnathan turned away from me. “I don't know… Whatever he wants to do, I don't really care.”
I know I looked confused and I definitely had no freakin idea what “it” was.
“Umm, what are we doing?” I asked.
Johnathan turned back to me and looked a little irritated.
Josh grunted, “Oh…you didn't tell Rue yet…? Sorry.” His words said “ I'm sorry”
but his tone said “I'm not sorry at all.”
Johnathan still had his eyes fixed on me. He had taken my hands in his.
Josh just had to keep going. “If you want me to explain it to her I'm down.”
Johnathan didn't move from his position. “No, thank you Josh…I am going to tell her myself, if you don't mind.”
Josh shrugged his shoulders and patted him on the back. “Good luck man,” he said as he opened the door and went back in.
I stood still for a moment, wondering what I was about to hear. I lasted about five seconds.
“Okay…so?” I asked him.
“Do you want to sit in the car?” he asked, very politely.
“I guess…here, the car…who cares?” I said, kind of concerned.
I am not used to seeing the nervous Johnathan, so the few steps I took to his car, seemed like they took forever. We both sat down and he started it up, so that classical music was playing quietly.
“Oh Okay…now I'm getting kinda freaked... Anytime there is a soundtrack to news, it's bad.”
He grinned. “No…I just thought, well, I don't know what I thought.” He shut the car off.
I looked up and Theodore, Kai, Sam, and Josh were staring out the window, they saw me and the curtain dropped.
I shifted my weight and turned to face him. “So?”
He shifted his weight and looked at me, with a weird expression on his face 230
“Rue…I know that... You know what...? Screw this. I asked Theodore to strip the memory of my family from my mind…and to do the same to them, concerning me.”
I sat there for a moment, trying to absorb it.
“You are going to do what?” I asked, pausing between every word.
He turned the music back on and turned it up a little.
“You can shut that crap off anytime Johnathan,” I said.
“Listen, I know you might think it's drastic, maybe even crazy…but I have given it a lot of thought and it's what I want to do.” He said it, not looking at me, so he couldn't see my expression of shock.
I sat there completely silent. A thousand things went through my mind in a flash. I opened the car door and slammed it and started walking, in a half sprint, towards the house. I heard him get out behind me and he hustled to catch up.
“I don't know how to explain this to you, in a way I think you could possibly understand,” he said a little breathless.
I opened the front door and everyone scrambled to their fake spots, obviously they had been spying on us from the window. He tried to touch me and I spun around.
“Please talk to me Rue!” he said with desperation in his voice.
“About what Johnathan…? How you are just throwing away a perfectly normal family…? For what exactly…? Not to mention, that you are talking to someone who would give anything to have their parents back…a normal family, something that resembles anything freakin close to it!”
He stammered which is so unlike him to do. “I…I don't, you shouldn't feel…”
I cut him off, “You are an ass for wanting this Johnathan…! And you…” I pointed to Theodore, “Are an evil witch for saying yes!”
Theodore laughed. “Well, at least you said „witch" and not „warlock".”
“Shut up!” I yelled at him, about two octaves higher than usual.
Josh was unusually silent.
“Nothing to say, huh Josh?” I asked, with as much sarcasm as I could muster up.
He shrugged his shoulders and made the biggest mistake he could of…he grinned.
“What…? What are you grinning about…? I bet you knew…! I bet you were the one who told him that Theodore could do it!”
He straightened up… “I did not… Johnathan will tell you that he asked Theodore, without any help from me.”
I turned back to Johnathan. “Is that true?” I asked him.
“Yes it is Rue… Listen I want you to know that I'm doing this for us.”
“Ha!” I blurted out. “No...no, no, you are NOT doing this for US…because US did not come up with this crap… YOU did.”
He reached for my hand and I took it from him.
“I don't think so,” I muttered.
“Rue… Why are you so mad?” He asked.
“Because Johnathan...My PARENTS are dead...!” I looked around the room.
“Yea…that's right… I know it, just because no one wants to say it, doesn't 231
change the fact that it is what it is...and you” I turned, with my finger pointed at his chest. “Just throw away what you have, like it doesn't matter...”
I started towards the door and looked back at Sam. “Give me a blade.”
She blinked. “What?”
“Give me a damn blade Sam!” I held my hand out…dead serious expression on my face. She pulled the blade from her leg strap, under her pants, and handed it to me. I held it up and then pointed it at all of them, in turn.
“I'm going to the library, or maybe I'm not…my choice…! If I see anybody dressed in white or with glowing palms, I'm stabbing first and asking questions later. So I would suggest that you all back the hell off of me for a little while...Got Me?”
I got a room of nods and I slammed the door behind me.
“Okay, yea...she's really pissed,” Kai said.
******
I stood on the porch for a moment, looking out at the street. I slipped the blade in the front pouch of my hoodie, and put my shades back on…stomping off, ears up. I made it two blocks, before I actually started to cry. I had to sit down on the curb and I buried my face in my knees. I hit that “kid trying to catch his breath part” when I heard tires pull up in front of me and realized it was Sara's car. She jumped out and came around to me, kneeling down.
“Ohhh, whats going on girlie?” she asked, obviously concerned.
I looked up and saw her pink glittery shoes and had to smile. She pulled my sunglasses down, to reveal red eyes and she sat down next to me.
“Is it boy stuff girl?” she asked, with disgust in her voice.
I sniffled and she wiped a tear that was lingering on my cheek.
“Something like that, I guess,” I answered…so far from the truth.
“Ohh...lets go shopping!” she crooned.
“What…? No, I don't want to…”
She stood up, with me attached to her arm, dragging me up with her.
“I'll tell you…buying something is the best, when you got the cries,” she said grinning.
“I…I don't have any money on me Sara,” I said, trying to stop her plan.
“Ohhh…no worries.” She reached in to her car and pulled out a credit card, all shiny and new. “I got a new toy…! I guess my Dad feels guilty for being away so much. So...when he got home yesterday, he gave me this to play with… I won't lie, it's good to be out of the „baby doll" category! Honestly Rue, one more doll and I would of buried myself in them and just starved to death, I swear!”
I grinned, it was fake...but I had too, it was Sara.
“I told everyone I was going to the library Sara.” Really, I had left my options open.
“I'm not taking NO as an answer. You left me here all summer with nothing to do…now we go play.”
She had a huge grin on her face and waved the card like chocolate at me.
“What the hell…lets go,” I said, as I got into the car.
232
******
We drove to the only hot spot in town for shopping. It consisted of shop after shop, with fun names like “The Dollhouse” and “Tea Party”. Truth was, I avoided these places, I had always gone straight to “Lucy's Last Chance Thrift.” I love the idea of picking up clothing someone else thought was past it's importance…kinda like finding a stray kitty. Plus, it didn't hurt that Lucy always had a great story and cookies…lots of homemade ones, which I ate without protest every time I went in there.
Today is “Sara day” though, so I am letting her lead. We hit the
“Dollhouse” first. I stepped in and chimes went off at the door. I looked up and noticed the pink bells chiming. Sara sighed, like she was in heaven and started towards the dress section. I stood still, looking around. The walls were painted like we were in a house, fake windows had been neatly painted with blue sky and hills in them. The clothes were suedo trendy, but looked a little Easter eggish in color. I stopped when I heard a growl at my feet. I looked down to see a small poodle standing his ground. I went to lean down to pet it and it barked at me and trotted to it's owner, a petite woman, dressed in baby blue head to toe. I looked up and she had scooped him up, giving him kisses.
I smiled. “Sorry, I think I scared your dog,” I said to her.
“NO…oh no...my boo boo here does not get frightened, he just loves his mama.”
She kissed him again and then “boo boo” started to kiss her lips. I had to look away, because it just…well, you know. Gross.
Sara called out to me, “OMG…lookie Rue!” I turned, as she held up a short light gray skirt that looked like it had strips on, it in an eclectic pattern. It had a tiny ruffle at the bottom. Obviously a mini skirt…not so much my style.
I grinned. “Yea…it's cute, you should try it on.”
“No…I think it would look so awesome on you Rue!”
“Ohh…” I knew I wouldn't win.
She came over and grabbed my arm, herding me towards the fitting room.
“Boo Boo” growled at me as I passed him. “I know,” I muttered, just letting him know I didn't think that I had any business being here either. Sara gave me the skirt and piled in five or six more things that she had found for me. She pulled the curtain and I stood there. I looked into the mirror and started to laugh. No matter why boo boo growled at me, I look like a child's nightmare with these ears up. I took my hoodie off and my sunglasses and I started to pull things on, one at a time. Sara wanted a fashion show…so I kept getting pulled out to model. I got mostly “Ahhhs.” One “Oh…maybe not” and then of course…the “must have”
when I stepped out with the gray skirt on. I looked down at my red chucks.
“I like it with the shoes,” I said as I looked back up, just in time to receive the look of disgust from boo boo's mama, but Sara agreed with me... I think she did, just so I would accept it from her.
“Alright, the skirt it is,” I said.
Sara grinned big time.
233
We paid…well, Sara's card paid at the counter and we headed out to our next stop. Sara turned to me. “Okay Rue…this is the most amazing store in the entire world.”
I had to respond, “The „entire" world?”
She nodded and we headed into “Tea Party”.
I don't know what I expected...well, yes I did. I thought it would be some crazy, over girlie store, with tea tables and stuff. It actually was pretty cool. I think the owner must be a huge Alice fan or does some type of drugs. The walls have black and white spirals on them, painted over purple. The counter is a huge hat and a very large, not so friendly looking, rabbit sits right in the middle of the store. I walked up to it and had to look up…it's eyes glowed red and it almost looked as if it had fangs. I started to flash to the memory of a blade being slammed into…and Sara knocked me out of my memory.
“OMG...RUE…come here!”
Sara said it low…so that the other two customers in the store would not hear her. I guess she was afraid she'd be forced to fight. I gave one last look at monster bunny and headed her way. She turned around, holding up the coolest dress I think I have ever seen. I tried not to stare at it too girl like, but it was hard.
It was black and white striped with a big red belt on it. You could barely see outlines of bunnies adorning the stripes of black, they were just a bit lighter. It just hung on the hanger all loose, and the neck looked as if it was cut too big. I had to try it on…had too. I took it and headed for the fitting room. Sara skipped behind me.
I slipped this dress on and adjusted the belt. It hung off one shoulder. I stood there staring at it on me, just shocked that I looked so cute. I stepped up to the mirror and noticed that every rabbit had a top hat on. Sweet.
Sara called out to me, “Well?” I stepped out and her jaw hit the floor.
“Holy crap Rue…! It looks like it was made for you,” she said with way too much excitement.
Truth was, I agreed…I loved it. I had no idea that a dress would seduce me, but it did. I looked at the price tag. It was expensive. I looked back up at Sara.
“This is way too much Sara,” I whispered.
“Get out!” She grinned. “You are getting that dress, period.”
I almost said no…but something in me said just do it. This dress cost more than I had ever spent at Lucy's. I turned to go back in to change and Sara stopped me. “Just pull your clothes out Rue, keep the dress on.” I reached in and grabbed my stuff. I had to wrap my borrowed blade in my hoodie. We paid at the counter and we got a bag to put my previous choice in it. I walked out, a believer in how cool this place was…first time ever.