Burning With Desire

by Winters, Bella

  He sighed. “I believe that this is supposed to represent the inner turmoil so many people feel. There is a duality to being human. We all have it. There is a darkness and a light, a dark side, and a light side, but I believe inside this individual there is peace, otherwise the darkness would have elements of chaos interspersed within it. And it’s calm and peaceful instead.”

  I smiled. “Wow, that was a great answer. I like your insights.”

  Just then as our eyes met, I realized that we were now standing close together—very close. I could practically feel his warmth emanating over to me and our energies mingled together creating that spark. I’d first felt this sweet spark the moment that we met. And I’d felt it bubbling underneath the surface for so long since then, always ready to reemerge. I was just waiting for the moment that would call it forth. And there it was. It was happening now.

  I found myself smiling softly as he leaned in closer. I didn’t even realize what was actually happening until it was almost too late. His lips touched mine and the spark within me began to sizzle, burning my skin in a glorious glow that spread warmly over my body and encapsulated the two of us together in our very own little section of the world. His lips were soft but rugged, his stubble scraping slowly against my chin to remind me of his penetrating masculinity. I craved him almost all the time and now I had him. This kiss had been building for a few weeks now, each time we were together just stoking the fire.

  And now it was happening. For a moment, my thoughts shut themselves down. There was no world. There was no me, no him—only the kiss. His soft breath entered into me and I gladly accepted it as his energy shifted to my body and I inhaled his essence. Ricky’s big, strong hand rested gently on my back as he pulled me in a little bit closer and applied more pressure to the kiss. I loved the way he was leading me, drawing me into him and there was not the least little morsel of resistance anywhere inside of me. Why would there be? I’d found the man that I had been looking for all my life. Not just for sex, but for all else. I wasn’t sure how that thought popped into my head, or why it was there, but I knew that I whole-heartedly believed it. There was no wiggle room there. This was the way that I felt.

  When our lips parted, I found that I wanted the kiss to continue. I wanted it to go on and on, and I wanted it to build up to something where Ricky could just ravage me right then and there. Nobody else could see us. We were in our own little world together and we could do no wrong. We were essentially alone. We didn’t have to bother with finding a place to be physically intimate. No, we could really just drop ourselves down to the floor and do what we wanted to do.

  But this was just pure fantasy. We were in the middle of a great art gallery having a good time looking at the works around us, and we had to abide by the rules of civilized society. Yet, my body was boiling over with sexual desire. I wanted Ricky so badly it hurt inside and out. I was sure that he was going to be the first, if he wanted to be. I wasn’t sure how I’d come to this decision so quickly. It wasn’t really a decision; it was a feeling. And if I really searched myself, I would have realized that I started feeling this way soon after I met him. There was just that unbelievable attraction. And now I knew what that attraction meant. He was supposed to be my first.

  I wasn’t sure how to bring up the fact that I was a virgin. I didn’t know if I should have just told him, or maybe waited until things got to that point. How would he react? I was twenty-five. There were few people my age who were still virgins walking around. And Ricky was nine years my senior. Would he want to be my first? It might have freaked him out for all I knew. That was the last thing I wanted to do. He might be so shocked that he decided that he didn’t even want to pursue a romance with me.

  Cool it down. You need to relax. Nothing is happening yet. So far, it is just a kiss.

  “Well, that was quite amazing,” Ricky said. I was surprised that he commented on it, but I had to agree it was the single best kiss of my entire life. Wow, it felt so sweet. I wanted it to never end and just keep going. I wondered if we could just walk around making out for the duration of our time in the art gallery. I doubted it. They probably would have frowned on that and accused us of drinking too much champagne.

  “That it was,” I said. I smiled sweetly at Ricky and he reciprocated. He reached out and gently took my hand in his and we continued our journey.

  We looked at several more pieces of art. We saw a few more paintings—some expressionistic, some abstract, some landscapes, some portraits, and some that reminded me of what the most perfect looking tie dye might resemble. If I could put it on a t-shirt, I most definitely would have. After that we also looked at some clay sculptures.

  “This would be perfect for Zoe,” I said picking up one that was a picture of a father holding his child on a porch swing. Ricky smiled at it and nodded in agreement.

  “That it would be,” he said. “I’ll keep that in mind before I leave.”

  I saw several pieces of art during our walk through that I would have loved to purchase, but even with Ricky’s generous salary that he was paying me, most of them were still well outside of my price range. Thus was the sad existence of the struggling artist; I was obsessed with art and spent most of my time creating it, but I couldn’t afford to buy other people’s art.

  We eventually finished our tour through the gallery and Ricky ended up buying that sculpture after all. “I’ll put it in Zoe’s room and she can look at it when she gets back, maybe it will be one of the last things she sees when she goes to bed at night.”

  When we arrived back at Ricky’s place, I sat down on the couch while he poured us both a glass of merlot. I loved merlot. Of all the wines, it was the one that really tingled my senses. Ricky sat down beside me and we just looked at each other in comfortable silence for several seconds. The silence in the room should have been awkward, but it felt cozy and comfortable somehow.

  As I sipped the wine, I found myself inching closer to Ricky. I wanted him badly. He was the sexiest man I’d ever met and the only man who had ever made me feel this hot and bothered just being around him. And I felt this way all the time.

  “So, did you have a good time at the gallery?” Ricky asked.

  “I did,” I said. “You seemed to be enjoying yourself and you have an excellent eye for art. You have a strong attention to detail.”

  “It goes with the territory of firefighting,” Ricky said. “Noticing what others may not is crucial in those situations.”

  “Yeah, but I think it’s something else. I know you have the soul of an artist inside of you. There seems to be something there that for whatever reason was never really nurtured and fostered.”

  “I don’t know,” Ricky said. “I guess I never really gave it much thought. I grew up in a very practical household. My dad was a bit of a hard ass. He worked the same job he hated for so many years and he always came home feeling the same way. He was miserable and he wasn’t able to enjoy the times when he wasn’t there. But he said you go to work every day and do your job because it is called being responsible. But he didn’t believe that one should waste their time on dreams or on doing anything you really wanted to do. He always said that if you are having fun, it’s not work, and you could never make a living that way. And for a long time I believed him. So, I kept my artistic ambitions to the side. When I graduated from high school, I went to work.”

  “You went to college, later?” I asked.

  “I did,” Ricky replied. “But I never really knew why I was there. I got a communications degree which I’ve never done anything with. It seemed to be something interesting and it kept me invested enough to slug through and graduate, but I had no idea what I wanted to do with it. With a college degree you can get an entry level job just about anywhere, so I moved from job to job for a while until I found my calling in firefighting.”

  “What led to that?” I asked.

  “Well, I was going to apply at the police academy. I’d heard that it was a good job, good pay, and great benefits.
But on the way there, I drove past a house that was on fire. I saw firemen rescuing people from a burning building. And the day before that I’d gotten a speeding ticket from a cop who did not seem to be enjoying life. One job seemed dull and the other seemed that it really made the most difference. So, I decided to give it a shot. I’d had a dream of being a firefighter as a kid, but that’s one of those dreams all kids have. It’s like wanting to be a football or baseball player. Most of those dreams never come true for most kids.”

  I was sitting right beside Ricky now and he suddenly put his arm around me and pulled me closer as he talked. I loved being right there beside him. His warmth wrapped me up and held me close. I felt so safe, so secure with him. I’d never felt so safe with any man before this.

  “That’s a beautiful story,” I said. I was staring up into his big, beautiful eyes. He was so immaculate. I wanted to just reach out and hold him tightly to me, to lean into him and let our bodies become one together.

  He leaned down feeling the moment and kissed me softly on the mouth. His touch was like fire jolting through my body filling me full of little shocks of pure bliss. The lips encompassed mine, wrapping around them, and then slipping past them slowly as he released the kiss and dove in for another. This happened repeatedly back and forth. Our bodies were warming up, the passion growing stronger, greater between us.

  His tongue entered my mouth and massaged mine, sliding, twisting around me, past me, and through me to catapult my own lust to new heights. I loved the way his mouth felt against mine, as if it had always belonged there.

  His tongue slid out and waved gently against my lips, and then again as I held my mouth open waiting for his sweet return. He did not keep me waiting long as his parted my lips with his sensuality and I allowed his tongue to slither back inside my verbal center.

  His hands moved through my hair, brushing it back at first before getting entangled in the long, wavy strands as he waved his hand through me. It felt so good. He was nurturing me, taking care of me, and initiating me into a new world. I’d been kissed plenty of times before, but never anything like this. No, this was a whole new world of wonder that had been opened up for me. It was perfect, like the best of all parts of my catalogue of fantasies that I’d put together over time. And now they were all coming together to create a fusion of bliss that I was only touching the iceberg of.

  His lips brushed against my mouth, moving down my neck, and then pausing at the nape, lingering where it met the collar bone. Then he moved a little lower and kissed me in that little groove against the bone. His kisses were soft and warm. His mouth was so hot against my skin. Every other kiss was given the added bonus of his tongue sliding against my neck.

  I was getting so turned on. I was wetter than I’d ever been. I could feel myself practically bursting with lust, gushing between my legs. I was calling out for him, whipping my pheromones into a frenzy that was bound to titillate every sense he had. I could already smell my own scent rising up and mixing with his. He smelled so good. There was something nurturing and caring about his scent, but it was infused with a dominant sensation as well.

  Ricky’s hand moved under my shirt and I felt his fingers gliding so gently against my skin as he moved closer to my bra strap. He found the strap, paused a moment and expertly with one hand unsnapped the bra. My straps loosened and the bra began to fall down under my shirt, where it was quickly assisted by Ricky’s hand gently pulling it away. He dropped it to the ground and I could feel his kisses intensifying as he found my lips once again with his and pressed his mouth firmly against mine this time. My tongue became aggressive and pushed hard into his mouth. He allowed me to dominate a little bit before rallying back with his own lust.

  His other hand was suddenly somewhere else. He was moving it up under my skirt until he was now touching my underwear and starting to slip inside of them. He was about to find my center and I knew that now was the time to have that conversation with him.

  I pulled back suddenly and touched his hand with mine. Ricky’s eyes were confused and he blinked a few times as if trying to snap himself out of some kind of a daze. “What’s wrong?” He asked.

  I took a deep breath and stared him straight in the eye. “There is something I should tell you before we go any farther.”

  His face got serious and concerned. Ricky looked into my eyes and leaned forward in such a caring manner. “Ok. What is it?”

  “I’ve never done this before,” I said.

  He was still a little bit confused. “What do you mean, exactly?” I was pretty sure he was starting to get the picture.

  “I’m a virgin.”

  He nodded as he understood and he sighed. “Ah, ok. I understand.”

  “No, you probably don’t,” I said. “But I’ll explain. I’ve always wanted my first time to be with someone special, someone I would never forget and always hold special in my heart as being my first. I’ve always heard stories of how many women regret the way their first time happened. I just never wanted that for myself. So, I swore that I would never want my first time to be with someone that I knew I wouldn’t feel special with.”

  Ricky smiled. “I understand.” He scooted back on the couch and ran his hands through his hair. Then he took a sip of wine.

  “I want this to be with you,” I said.

  He looked at me a bit shocked. “Are you sure? We don’t know each other that well.”

  “Yes, I know. And I’m sure. I feel something with you, that I’ve never felt before. I can’t explain it, but I know it’s real.”

  Ricky leaned back to me and put his hand on mine. “I feel the same way. Ever since the moment I met you, I knew that there was something different about this, about us. I… I haven’t felt this in so long. I want this with you, too. And I’m honored if you feel the same way.”

  “I do,” I said. A tear was grazing the corner of my eye. Ricky quickly reached up and wiped it away with his thumb.

  He moved in closer and kissed me softly, sweetly. “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of everything. I will teach you everything you want to know. I want to show you this beautiful world. I want you to know that you can always trust me, sweetie.”

  Hearing those words melted my heart and sent a surge of desire pulsating through my body. Knowing that I was this safe and with someone who really cared about me made all the difference in the world. This was really going to happen. I was about to experience physical love for the first time.

  And I was ready. I knew I was ready. Before anything actually happened, I knew that I was glad that I had waited for Ricky. He was amazing and sweet. He was going to take care of me. He would be patient and show me the ropes. He would care about me and make sweet love to me.

  I felt the tension inside of me erase itself. I had been feeling it all evening waiting for this moment, which I knew would happen. But there was so much I did not know. I wasn’t sure how Ricky would respond to this news. But he did it perfectly. He was going to take such good care of me and as he led me to the bedroom, I was certain that this night would change my life in so many profound ways.

  And I was ready for all of it.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Ricky

  I sat Julie down on the edge of the bed and gently brushed her beautiful hair back from her forehead. She looked so peaceful. The woman was the epitome of beauty and she picked me as the man that she would want to give her ‘V’ card. I felt so blessed and honored to be chosen for this role and I wanted to make sure that everything went perfectly for her. She was such a sweet, wonderful person inside and out that I needed to know that I was giving her an experience she would carry with her for the rest of her life. She would always remember this as something beautiful and special whether we stayed together or not. But at that moment, it felt like to me at least, that we had a good shot.

  I had nothing to really base this feeling on, other than it being the continuation of the feeling that Julie felt when she said she wanted to have this experience with me. She di
dn’t know why after all the years of saving herself it suddenly felt right to make love for the first time with me, but it was the right moment. She knew it. I knew it.

  I stared into her eyes and watched as she smiled that perfect smile warmly at me. I loved to watch the hint of light dancing around inside her perfect gaze, and the way it drew even more beauty to her smile. That was priceless, something that I would never get tired of looking at.

  I kissed her softly, allowing my lips to linger on hers for a few seconds before moving my mouth slightly to dig a bit deeper into the sweetness. I heard a slight moan escape from her mouth and I pursued it a little deeper still. There it was. I could feel her body getting turned on as she surrendered to the kiss, and surrendered to the moment. There was no tension within her that I could feel. She was happy to be there with me and I was thrilled to be there with her.

  My lips moved even harder as I breathed into the kiss and parted her lips slightly to allow some of her own breath to flow into me. Then my tongue followed as I slipped it between those rubies and into her warm, wet mouth where I let it languish for a moment. She could do with it as she wished. Her tongue came in to meet mine and the two sweet appendages danced together, like the most gorgeous snakes entwined in a mating fight. It felt incredible. Every single cell in my body was receiving pulse after pulse of what felt like illicit pleasure. I was already hard as a rock. My package was twisting up inside of my tight jeans begging to be ripped free.

  The kiss went farther and deeper. I turned my head more to facilitate this and I was sucking up her mouth now into mine and our tongues were still wrestling together as our bodies undulated back and forth against each other in this warm embrace of passion. My hand was moving through the beautiful forest of her hair as I continued to brush it back and away in a comforting gesture that was as much comforting for me as it was for her. I could tell she enjoyed having her hair played with.