by Janet Woods
A star streaked across the sky and disappeared beyond the horizon. Grace cried out at the fleeting miracle.
‘Creating a symphony, a new star …’ he said softly.
‘When are you going to give me this poem you’re composing, Dominic?’
‘I don’t know. There’s a time for everything, and my poem hasn’t quite settled into its style yet.’
She turned into his chest, held him tight and smiled into the darkness surrounding them. ‘You’re being a tease. Do you think that star we saw might have been your mother’s star?’
‘I expect she was showing her approval.’
‘I love you,’ she said.
He bore her hand to his mouth. ‘I love you too.’
‘How much?’
‘As much as all those stars above us, and they’re beyond counting.’ There was something in his voice, a reluctance that sent a chill through her. He hesitated for a moment and then he said quietly, ‘There’s something I must tell you.’
The stars in the sky spun around her, peppering her happiness with a worrisome spot of decay. ‘Do you not love me after all?’
‘Didn’t I just say I did love you, and always will.’
Dread gathered inside her. ‘Then if it isn’t that, perhaps you are married to another after all, or perhaps you have children and you didn’t want to tell me. I don’t mind. I will love your children as though they were my own – like Lady Eugenie loved you and your brother. And if you are married I will still adore you, and will do so until I die.’
He ran his knuckles gently down her face. ‘Such a lot you have endured, my Gracie. Now this.’
‘What is this? Tell me.’ Fear flamed in her again. ‘You’re not ill, are you?’
He chuckled, and then kissed her with great tenderness. ‘If I tell you I’ve deceived you, will you be so forgiving then.’
‘Have you deceived me then?’
‘Yes, I’m afraid I have … but it was for your own good.’
The moon went behind a cloud and stayed there.
Twenty-Three
Gracie couldn’t believe what she was hearing, and her vulnerability was suddenly very apparent to her.
First she’d been Miss Ellis, and then she’d become Mrs Dominic LéSayres. Now she was Grace Ellis again.
She fell silent, near to tears. So much for her pride in using his name, in repeating the marriage vows, when she had meant every word uttered – and he had not. She had trusted him, given herself to him and told him she loved him. How many other women had he treated like this, as a means to the end?
She had given him everything she had, while he’d given her nothing but a future that would never materialize. What about the land on which he’d build their home, the children they’d share? She no longer had a roof over her head so where would she go now. His promises had all been lies.
‘Gracie … talk to me.’
‘And say what? That your behaviour is reprehensible, that I cannot trust you and you’ve brought me down as far as I can go.’
‘There’s no need to be so melodramatic, my dear. We will be married properly as soon as I can arrange it. The licence will be obtained, the banns will be properly read, and, come the fourth Sunday, our vows will be exchanged and there will be a New Year’s Eve ball to introduce you to local society. This I promise you.’
‘I know most of them. They are the people who turned their backs on me when I had nowhere else to go.’
‘Can we not allow them that small slight, when none of us are perfect?’ He kissed her ear. ‘I thought you loved me … you said you’d love me unto death.’
Dominic was the very devil to deal with. He countered fantasy with logic and vice versa. When she was agitated he was calm. ‘That was before. Will you please stop kissing me. And stop being clever.’
Laughter huffed from him. ‘Oh Lord, I knew your pride would be pricked but I didn’t think you’d make such a fuss. It’s not that important.’
She pushed him away. ‘It might not be important for you, Mr LéSayres, but you’ve tricked me into believing we were married, and you’ve made a fool out of me.’
His voice cooled slightly. ‘Mr LéSayres is it now? May I point out that it’s you making a fool of yourself. If you’d done as I asked in the first place and stayed safely at King’s Acres instead of pursuing some hare-brained plan of your own, then there would have been no need for this conversation. Shall we drop the subject for now? If you allow time for your temper to cool you might be able to apply some reason to the subject.’
‘Reason … hare-brained …’ She mentally stamped her foot, and, feeling totally miserable, she turned away from him and began to walk down the hill, tears scalding her cheeks.
He caught her up. ‘Where are you going, my Gracie?’
She was shivering now, and it wasn’t all due to the cold. The dark void of the sky scape with its uncountable number of stars served only to remind her of her loneliness. Her life was falling apart, all her dreams scattering like seeds in the wind. ‘I don’t know.’
The fob watch he wore under his jacket offered him five muffled chimes and sounded like a death knell. ‘Can you forgive me for being such a fool, Gracie?’
‘I don’t know … I can’t think and I don’t want to talk about it now.’
She didn’t want to talk about it ever.
‘Will you ride with me? I’ll take you to King’s Acres.’
Where else could she go? When she nodded he lifted her on to Argus and mounted behind her. She stiffened when her body touched against his.
It was a romantic night. There was enough moonlight to illuminate their way as it sailed out of one cloud and into another, appearing again like a cutter carving up the sea and wind. It painted the foliage with a brittle icy crystal.
Argus thundered along, his feet drumming on the hard-packed earth, faster than Dominic usually allowed. There was something wild and exhilarating about the ride, and dangerous but it was more about horsemanship than temperament. Dominic knew how fast he could go and still keep control. He and his horse were a perfect fit. Steam clouded the air around them. Grace clung on to Dominic, tighter than she wanted to, and when they could smell the animal’s perspiration he gradually reduced his stride.
Soon they reached King’s Acres. He handed the reins to the stable hand on duty and slid her from Argus’s back. When she wouldn’t meet his eyes he lifted her chin with his forefinger, so she had no choice. ‘Gracie, trust me. I do love you.’
Even those words couldn’t warm her, since she no longer believed them.
Vivienne came from the drawing room, pulling a shawl round her shoulders. ‘Alex wasn’t sure if you’d be home in time for dinner, so I told the kitchen to cook for you both anyway. It will be lovely to have a full table again.’ She kissed Dominic’s cheek. ‘Welcome home, Dom, you look done in. Is your business over and done with now?’
‘It seems so. I’ll be returning to my rooms after dinner.’
‘What a pity, I was looking forward to hearing of your adventures.’
He managed a grin that made Grace’s stomach flutter with guilt at the twisted pain of it. ‘I’ll be home for the weekend, as usual.’
‘Alex is in the library. Go and talk to him.’
There was so much love in this family, and Grace wanted to be part of it. She owed Vivienne an apology. ‘I’m sorry, my Lady … leaving as I did was rude of me.’
‘I admit I was a little piqued at the time, but nothing is unforgiveable. We worried before your maid found your note, but we knew Dominic would look after you.’ Vivienne kissed her cheek, and then said, ‘You’ve been crying, Gracie dear. Is there something wrong?’
‘I’m, tired, that’s all. The cold air has caused my eyes to water.’
Dominic removed his hat, gloves and topcoat, and handed them to the waiting footman who carried them away. ‘Grace is tired and hungry. Unfortunately she has overtaxed herself these past few days, and it’s been a long ride. Would you l
ike me to carry her to her room?’
‘I’m capable of managing by myself.’
‘As you wish.’ He gave her a short bow, and then he turned on his heel and strode off.
Vivienne looked bewildered. ‘I’ve never seen Dominic so put about. He is not his usual self.’
Grace admitted, ‘We have argued.’
‘May I ask what about?’
‘I’d rather not say, it all seems so stupid now.’
‘Did Dominic start the argument? He has a tendency to withdraw into himself, and then let fly. He wouldn’t have liked you placing yourself in danger on his behalf.’
‘I see.’ They walked together up to her room, and she was only a little out of breath, though it felt as if her energy was draining away.
Jancy was bustling about, unpacking her bag. She was wearing the King’s Acres house colours of dark blue with white collars and cuffs, and with a white apron over the top.
When Grace lived in the house on the hill with Dominic she must buy her servants their own colours. Pale blue perhaps, since it was such a clean and neat colour.
But Dominic’s word had proved to be false and her house on the hill would probably never eventuate.
Her grievances burst out of her. ‘We were wed … and it was all lies, for we had no licence or permissions. All we did was to exchange vows. I didn’t know it was an illegal marriage until an hour or so ago. I didn’t expect him to be so casual about it, I suppose. He had it all planned out. Now I don’t know how I feel.’
‘About him?’
‘About anything. Dominic made me feel so secure, yet there is something about him that’s so precious and vulnerable, and … needful of me.’
‘And now you don’t love him … doesn’t that tell you something?’
‘I do love him, Vivienne. He’s so unexpected … but I’ve never known him to be as curt as he was this evening. He promised we would take our vows again, and with all the legalities intact and he even showed me the land where our home was to be built. He had everything planned, but it was a diversion from what he really wanted to tell me.’
‘Which was?’
‘That he’d deceived me. That we were not married after all.’
‘That was clumsy of him.’
‘I told him I no longer trusted him, and I still don’t.’
‘Oh, my dear, that would have wounded him. No doubt he will think it through and reach the same conclusion. He will try to put things right between you, and he might even make a grand gesture with an ultimatum. If you want my advice, make him work a little for your favour, but don’t put him in a position where his back’s to the wall. Now … you have to sleep and regain your strength.’ Vivienne turned to Jancy. ‘Fetch your mistress some mutton stew and dumplings while I ready her for bed.’
‘Yes … my Lady.’
‘I’m not hungry, Vivienne.’
‘You will be when you taste the stew. It’s just the thing for a warm winter’s evening. Cook has had it on a slow heat all day and the meat falls from the bone.’
Vivienne was right, the tasty hotpot filled Grace up and made her sleepy.
The whisper of a man’s voice only just penetrated the darkening barrier of her exhaustion.
‘How is she?’
‘She ate most of her dinner, has warmed up and is now fast asleep. She is upset, but as far as I can see the pair of you have blown things up out of all proportion. Grace does have a legitimate grievance, but so do you. Leave her for a while, my dear.’
‘How long is a while?’
‘A month … you can see her in church on Sundays.’
‘A whole month, and with the congregation commenting on everything we do and say. That will be torture. Can I see her now.’
‘Just for a moment, but don’t wake her.’ Vivienne chuckled. ‘You know, Dom, if you truly love Grace then you will easily survive a short parting.’
The recumbent Grace could picture the expression on Dominic’s face, that endearing little frown of his, and she wanted to giggle.
He picked up her hand, kissed her palm and folded her fingers over the kiss. ‘So be it, Gracie girl … Vivienne has just lit the fuse and we will see who will win this little skirmish. I know you better than you know yourself, and if I’m going to be made an ass of I’m going to do it in grand style, and do it my way.’
‘How exciting,’ Vivienne said. ‘I knew you’d come up with an ingenious plan. Do tell me what it is.’
‘Certainly not, it’s none of your business.’
‘It will be everyone’s business by tomorrow. I know you went through with that form of marriage to protect her, dearest brother-in-law but now you must take time to court her. Surely you can think of something romantic to make her feel loved.’
‘Grace does feel loved, she just won’t admit it.’
Grace fell into sleep feeling somewhat annoyed … even if there was a grain of truth in his words.
It was not such an easy night for Dominic. He tossed and turned like a frog in a frying pan as he went over the details in his mind.
Tomorrow he would see the reverend. Over the next three weeks Dominic could post the first bann, and if nobody objected they could wed on the fourth Sunday. He had his work to do as well, and he remembered he’d offered Gracie the clerk’s position and sat up in bed.
That same day he sent a pile of documents with Vivienne for her to copy. They were connected to her small legacy. She ran her finger over his signature, murmuring, ‘LéSayres.’ She still wore the gold ring he’d placed on her finger.
Vivienne smiled at her. ‘Dominic said he’d wait for the small bundle, since he’s in a hurry. You will have to sign them and he’ll countersign them. The other papers are to be copied over the coming week.’
She’d just started to sign them when Eugenie came in for a chat. ‘My goodness, aren’t you dressed for church yet, what are you doing?’
‘I’ve got to sign these papers.’
‘Well, do hurry.’
Grace abandoned the reading of them and quickly signed the remaining papers. Eugenie took them from her and headed for the door. ‘I’ll give these to Dominic, you get yourself ready for church.’
Jancy came in, slightly out of breath. ‘I’ll fashion your hair.’
Dominic’s plan regarding Grace was related to his brother, and was overheard by a passing footman. The words spread like ice melting on a pond. Servants passed the news on. Ladies began to trim their hats and men left visiting cards. Conjecture ran rife.
The following Sunday saw the homely little church packed to the rafters.
There was also a sizeable crowd waiting in the churchyard. Introductions were made. They took their places inside, squashing in where they could.
The reverend moved into the pulpit, beaming happily.
Dominic arrived, his pale trousers tucked into his boots. A ruby in a gold setting secured his snowy cravat. His jacket was a blush of dark rose that matched the gown Grace wore with the velvet bodice.
It had been one of the garments from Lady Florence’s wardrobe. With an unerring eye Dominic had packed the prettiest and newest garments, along with accessories and bonnets.
‘I can’t afford all those gowns,’ she’d protested.
‘You’ve already paid for them with some interest from your mother’s legacy. They look as though they were made for you and will do for a start. Don’t worry, I’ll give you a receipt.’
She blushed when all eyes turned her way. So this was his method of bringing her around to his way of thinking. Her calf muscles tensed as she prepared to take flight.
‘Miss Ellis, may I?’
She nodded, her forefinger smoothing over the ring she wore.
Sweeping her a bow Dominic grinned and slid into the empty space beside her. It was a tight fit. ‘Your pardon for being late, you may proceed, Reverend.’
There was a sprinkle of clapping as her heart exploded in all directions, and she tried not to smile. Sometimes she felt as i
f she could eat Dominic LéSayres, and this was one of those moments, with his thigh pressed warmly against hers and laughter in his usually austere face.
He kissed her hand.
Grace closed her eyes and allowed her imagination to run riot until the reverend said, and quite unexpectedly, ‘I publish the Banns of Marriage between Dominic LéSayres of this parish, and Grace Elizabeth Ellis. If any of you know cause, or just impediment, why these two persons not be joined together in holy matrimony, ye are to declare it. This is the first time of asking …’
There was a breathless silence. She shot upright in her seat and half turned her head, to be confronted by a sea of faces full of eyes. They were curious, amused, assessing and brimming with good wishes, and if anyone objected she would kill them! She opened her mouth to protest but couldn’t get the words out. She felt like an exhibit, a goldfish swimming in circles in a glass bowl. Next time she would publish her impediment and put an end to it … she just had to think of one.
After a few moments the reverend nodded in satisfaction. ‘We will now say the Lord’s prayer together.’
There was a collective exhale as she bowed her head.
She whispered, so only he could hear it, ‘Not me … you’re past redemption.’
‘I thought you liked wicked men. Don’t you love me any more, my angel?’
‘No … yes … sometimes.’
He smiled. ‘That’s encouraging.’
Grace sat through the rest of the service, her eyes closed, marvelling at the lusty country voices that thrust the words of the hymns out of their mouths with a joyous sincerity that rang to the rafters.
When she arrived back to King’s Acres she found a wicker basket on the chair.
‘Mr LéSayres left it for you before you went to church,’ Jancy said.
‘Oh, how lovely of him … I must thank him.’
She’d barely lifted the lid when there was a hiss. A bundle of striped fur leapt at her. She managed to catch it, lifting it by the scruff of the neck like its mother would have. ‘You don’t have to be so fierce. Nobody will hurt you.’ She cradled him against her chest and stroked his chin until he relaxed and began to purr. ‘There now, Jancy will go and fetch you some milk and then you’ll feel like one of us.’