by L C Kincaide
Emma’s gaze lowered, and a weight dropped to the pit of his stomach.
“There is someone.” He said, just now realizing what should have occurred to him much earlier. Why had he assumed she was single? Because she had arrived at a family wedding in a different country with her mother? Did he really believe she had no one waiting for her at home? Had he misread that kiss?
“Forgive me. Sometimes I am astonishingly daft.”
“It’s complicated.” Emma said meeting his eyes. “Feels like everything is these days.”
He considered her words. “You have so much on your plate right now, but it doesn’t have to be always.”
“Probably not,” she smirked, “but my life seems to turn out that way.”
“If there is anything I can do to uncomplicate your life, you will let me know?” He grinned giving his best to appear undaunted.
Oh, how he would complicate it, he had no idea! “Yes, I will.”
“I have a confession to make.” He gazed into her questioning eyes. “Since the night we went to the Abbey and our chat, I’ve been thinking about what brought me to the manor in the first place. And it wasn’t a passion for the hospitality industry.”
“Sounds like you’ve been doing a lot of thinking. Could be serious.”
“Actually, it was probably puttering somewhere in the back of my mind for a while and I just haven’t had time to properly deal with it.”
“You miss the renovation, don’t you?”
“Yes, the challenge and the possibilities. I have you to thank for it.”
Emma’s eyes widened. “Me?”
“Yes, you, Miss Emma. Talking about it with you and then not being able to talk to you because of distractions. I almost didn’t find you in time.”
“Maybe now you can get back to it. Make the changes you planned on.”
“I think I will after I have everything else sorted out. It seems we both have a bit of that in our immediate future.”
“That much is true.” Emma agreed.
“But I still wish you weren’t leaving straight away.” As if to mock him, the announcement to board Emma’s flight echoed from a loudspeaker.
“That’s me.” She said rising to her feet, suddenly not wanting to go. Since he found her, his eyes seemed to be searching hers for something, she wasn’t sure what. The intensity of his gaze should have unnerved her, but she was used to it, having seen it before many times in a painting and then in a vision in the ballroom. In fact, seeing it on a real man thrilled her which was why she had to push him out of her mind. She could not fall for him, regardless of what happened between her and John. Adam was too far away for her to entertain romantic fantasies, however spectacular they promised to be. No, she could not, would not put herself through that. If she had to remind herself daily, then she was prepared to do it. This would have to be goodbye.
He accompanied her to the security screening. They stopped, and she raised her head to say goodbye and found herself lost in a deep and tender kiss. Her carry-on toppled over when she dropped the handle to hold him. When her eyes opened, he held her gaze in that intense way.
“Have a good flight, Miss Emma.” He whispered softly.
Oh my God! Her tongue flicked over her lips and her hand searched the emptiness beside her where the bag’s handle should be. Flushed, she scooted down and yanked it upright. Was one of the perennially stone-faced security guards smirking?
“Thanks.” She said flustered still under the effects of that kiss as if a flashbulb had popped before her eyes leaving spots.
Adam took a step back and jammed his hands into his pockets to prevent himself from reaching for her.
“I better get going. Mum’s already on board and she always hated to be kept waiting.” She tossed the bag onto the belt and stepped through the security gate.
Adam watched knowing in his bones this was wrong, but what could he do? She turned once to wave before hurrying to the departure gate.
~*~
“Emma, thank God you’re home!” Rachel rushed toward her as soon as Matthew opened the door and threw her arms around Emma.
She was glad to be back in a familiar place, what used to be her childhood home and with the people she loved.
“It’s so good to be home, you have no idea!” She hugged Rachel.
“Come on in, sit down. Can I get you anything?”
“No, thanks.”
“Poor you. You look beat! It must be really late for you.”
“About three am. I’ll be going to bed pretty soon.”
“We have it all ready and waiting for you. How was your flight? Were you able to sleep at all?”
“It was okay. Only a little turbulence. I couldn’t sleep. I thought I would, but…”
“Hmmm.” Rachel nodded sympathetically. “You have a lot on your mind.”
“Yeah, no kidding. But I brought you a surprise.” She grinned. “It’s in my carry-on. Right on top.”
Rachel tottered over and pulled out a box of chocolates. ”Oohhh! Just what I don’t need! Thanks!” She returned with the box and hungrily eyed the contents.
“They give them out on the plane with honey-roasted nuts and champagne.”
“Did you hear that Matt? We’re switching airlines!”
Matthew grinned. “Are you sure you won’t have anything? Cold water?” He watched her with concern.
“I know you have a million questions.”
“They can wait.” Matthew squeezed her shoulder. “Let’s all go to bed.”
“We went to your apartment and brought you fresh clothes. I figured you’d like something clean that isn’t wrinkled.”
“Oh, thanks! That’s so sweet.” Emma was on the verge of tears.
“Go on, you two. I’ll turn off the lights.”
“We can chat all day tomorrow.” Rachel said walking Emma up the stairs. “I’m so glad you’re back. It must have been horrible for you when… you don’t still think it’s your fault, I hope.”
“I don’t know what to think.” She said weary from the tiring day. “I’m just glad to be surrounded by people and things that are familiar.”
“This is your home too and you’re going to stay as long as you want to. You’re not alone, okay?” She said pointedly opening the door to Emma’s childhood bedroom.
“I know and thank you.” She took Rachel in a fierce hug. “Hey, did you put on weight?”
Rachel shot her a warning glance. “We don’t talk about that here.” Then she grinned.
“Oh, sorry.” She put a finger to her lips.
“Goodnight, Emma.”
“Goodnight.”
Showered and dressed in her favorite cotton sleep shirt, Emma burrowed under the blankets. The bedroom was dark and silent. Set near the top of a quiet cul-de-sac and backing onto parkland, there were no traffic noises from the street to disturb the neighborhood.
Emma’s head pulsed with images and memories generated in the past few days. In her room, she found it hard to believe the wedding and meeting Adam at the reception, discovering John’s unexpected plans and her subsequent escape to Everdon Manor had all happened. Was that real? Then discovering the truth about Adam and her mother’s underhanded schemes. Of all that transpired, it was that which caused her the most distress — that and her sudden death. Her mother was many things, but unethical was not a quality she had ever considered. She would tell Matthew what happened, but not every detail. It would not benefit him to know that about the only mother he remembered.
Why had she resorted to such tactics to be rid of the manor? Why the rush? Would she forever blame herself and her defiance for causing her death or was it a coincidence? A new idea occurred to her — with her actions hadn’t Elinor defied Mason too? He had been capable of manipu
lating to get what he wanted, they all knew it. Was he equally able to prevent something from happening, even now? Emma had been convinced since his reuniting with Amelia months ago that he was gone from their lives. Now she wasn’t so sure.
And Adam. Where to start? It didn’t matter — it was over before it could. Nevertheless, when she fell asleep, it was to thoughts of him.
BOSTON
~*~
“So this is the original manor?” Rachel asked setting the book down.
Emma had brought Rachel’s copy downstairs, disappointed she had forgotten to give him the books to autograph. Too late for that now.
“It’s hard to believe isn’t it?”
“And this Adam Kinsley did all this?”
“He did. He really has a feeling for it.”
“It shows.” Rachel agreed. “There isn’t a picture of him in the book or online. Does he really look like our favorite Bond?”
Emma nodded. “Better.”
Rachel sighed dreamily. “I wish I could see for myself.”
“You know where to find him. You can always go for a visit.”
“I’d love to, but not anytime soon.” She patted her belly. “How did you sleep? You look better.”
“Pretty well, actually. The pill the doctor gave me helped.”
“The timing.” Rachel shook her head. “Please tell me you don’t feel responsible for what happened to Elinor.”
Emma shrugged. “I’m trying not to, but we really got into it. I found out things I probably shouldn’t have, not like that anyway.” She said and once started, couldn’t stop until it was all laid bare, including her odd conversation with the ghost of Clara Massie.
Rachel watched her amazed. “That’s unbelievable.” She whispered. “After all this time with no one knowing. How did he take it?”
“Shocked. I didn’t get a chance to warn him and by the time he found out, I was headed for the airport. He just caught me before the flight.” She tried not to remember his kiss.
“Mason sure had a knack for stirring up trouble. At least he tried to make it right.”
“Like I said, too little too late.”
“So what’s Adam like?”
Emma described his exceptionally good looks and his charming personality, then went on to talk about his talent, dedication and passion for his work. Despite all those qualities, he was also thoughtful and humble; always considerate of her thoughts and not the least conceited. He sounded amazing, and it didn’t escape Rachel that Emma smiled during this assessment of the long lost Everdon, whom she fervently hoped to meet one day.
“He sounds wonderful. I can’t believe he’s single.”
“He’s divorced. That could be why. A person can only be burned that many times.” She included herself in that as well.
They spent the day curled up on the couch in their comfy sweats like a couple of girls at a sleep-over, munching on popcorn and pretzels and drinking herbal tea. Emma filled her in on the more fun details of the trip and her communion with the different ghosts.
“If nothing else, I could be Emma, the ghost whisperer.” She said wryly.
“And give Mabel the Medium a run for her money!”
They gave themselves permission to laugh and be silly before the funeral. None of that would be easy. It looked like it would also be the first time she’d see John since their argument.
~*~
She supposed this day would come though it had always seemed hypothetical. Children were meant to outlive their parents yet somehow, she had expected Elinor would live forever. There had never been a time she had not been part of Emma’s life, whether through good times or the more turbulent as they had been recently. A future without her mum had never really crossed her mind as a real possibility, yet here she was struggling with the reality. How would life go on now? Maybe she shouldn’t think about it today. Similar thoughts had crossed her mind when her father died all those years ago. That day too had passed in a daze.
Elinor had opted for a closed casket service, perhaps not trusting anyone to pencil in her eyebrows to her satisfaction and — heaven forbid! — choose the wrong shade of lipstick; she had always been particular about such things. Rather, a lovely framed portrait that must have been taken recently leaned against an easel surrounded by white roses and sprays of bright green lily grass. She looked peaceful though not quite smiling, her eyes soft in a distant gaze. The last time she had seen her mother… well, it was not how she’d like to remember her, nor the time immediately preceding that with Elinor raging, tight lipped and flushed. Oh, mum.
Voices droned around her and her heart skipped a beat when she noticed the back of the dark-haired man in a black suit. He turned to face her.
Robert. Of course it was he — who else was she expecting? Adam? It wouldn’t be like him to crash a funeral. For a moment though, she had hoped…
“Emma.” He strode toward her and took her in a brief embrace dropping a light kiss on her cheek.
Not so long ago, she would have done anything for him to hold her, but that was an old worn out fantasy. Since then, she’d added one more.
“I’m so glad you’re here. Thank you for coming. How was your honeymoon?” Besides being cut short to attend this funeral? He looked fit and tanned.
“Wonderful, in fact.” His smile faded. “Please accept our deepest condolences. Your mum’s passing came as a shock. I can hardly believe she’s gone.”
“I know what you mean.” She said wryly.
Beside him, Chloe eyed her coolly, not happy about her condensed trip and probably resenting her axing the Realestate deal on her parents’ behalf on top.
“My sympathies.” She affected a nasal tone that seemed more pronounced since they’d last met, or maybe she had a cold. She offered a limp hand and Emma took it gingerly. If the new Lady Langstone expected her to curtsy, she’d be waiting until after the apocalypse for that to happen.
“Chloe. How nice to see you again.” Emma said politely. “Excuse me, I have to greet the others.” She shrugged helplessly.
“Of course.” Robert said. “If you need anything…”
“Thank you, Robert. It means so much of you to offer.” She said meaning it and walked away without giving his wife another glance.
She took turns saying hello to the rest of the family; Sir Theo who greeted her warmly as before and Grace who looked amazing in a form-fitting black wool crepe dress in a demure length that barely skimmed her knees. She towered over them in conservative three inch heels.
“How are you holding up?”
“So far, so good.”
“That was a wonderful eulogy Matthew gave. He has a knack for public speaking. I was quite moved by his words.” She admitted, which was a revelation for Emma. Grace seldom showed her true feelings and for her to admit to having them was profound. “It would seem I never really knew Elinor, the way he spoke about her.”
“Yes, it was good. They had a close relationship.”
Grace’s eyes swept around taking in the solemn looks and murmurs of conversations. “This rather marks the end of an era.” She said with finality.
“I was thinking the same thing.” The Weekends over, their next gathering would be for a wedding or a funeral. Emma wondered which, and who would be next. She scanned the room.
The Ruskins were across the way, speaking with Matthew. They had offered their sympathies to her early on, but everything was a blur already. Frances was in conversation with Rachel and Carrie stood by her father’s side, her bright eyes dulled by the somber occasion.
Where was John? Their eyes had met briefly when he entered the chapel with his parents. To her horror, her eyes had filled with tears and she had hastily looked away. Given the circumstances, no one would question her crying — it was expected at a fun
eral. After that, she didn’t see him again though he had to be somewhere close.
“It was a lovely service.” Grace continued.
The funeral home had done a fine job of artfully arranging white lilies, roses, chrysanthemums and combinations of the blooms in vases and wreathes around the white coffin. Elinor would have approved of the tasteful monochromatic display. While pretty, sitting so close to the front, the blend of their sweet scents had soon become cloying and Emma’s head felt light. She hoped Rachel was okay with it.
Seated beside her, Rachel had held her hand throughout the service and Emma took comfort in that. She stared ahead as the priest spoke, determined not to turn around, though she had sensed John nearby. Only when Matthew stepped up to the podium did she pay attention and was glad she had kept their mother’s antics in London to herself. He deserved better than to have his memories of her sullied. It was enough that she knew.
Then they wheeled out the casket with the spray of white lilies on top to the waiting hearse. The family being so small, the men didn’t make up the number of pall bearers required to carry it out themselves.
John had been seated behind her and again, she had refused to search for him. Maybe he would leave and she wouldn’t speak to him at all. Following the brief internment service, they gathered in Elinor’s condo. It seemed strange to see Esther out of her maid’s uniform and in a black dress. Her hair scraped back from an ashen face, her eyes and nose were red, and she wiped at them repeatedly at a loss for something to do. The caterers had taken over her duties. Emma didn’t realize her mum and Esther were close though it shouldn’t surprise her. Elinor likely provided for her loyal, long-time maid in her Will though she would have to find a new place to live. She felt sorry for the woman having lost so much.