by Tara Lee
I release a soft breath as I take in the sight of his stomach. I have seen him without his shirt on countless times before, but it still heats my skin whenever I catch a glimpse. He has gotten tattoos now that covered his side, shoulders, and his back. He got his first one at eighteen. After that, he just keeps adding to his skin. I admire them now when he has his shirt off.
“Well I’m glad it wasn’t as shitty as you thought it would be.” He turns his head to glance at me. I tear my eyes away from his stomach and catch him smirking again. He knows I was ogling him.
Really Smooth, Charli.
I speak to Eli for what seemed like hours until he tells me he must leave. He and the guys are heading to a different party because Jensen weaselled his way back into Nana’s good graces. My heart catches. I know Eli will pick someone up there. It’s what Jensen, Eli, and their other friends do at parties. They’re all players—whichever women they chose to sleep with that night just become another notch in the bedpost. So, since I know that, why is my heart falling in love with Eli? He is the one guy I shouldn’t have feelings for.
Am I stupid to have those feelings?
I know Eli will never feel the same, but some part of me— even if it was the smallest part—hopes that maybe someday he will.
Chapter 2
CHARLI
Seventenyersold
THE MUSIC IS LOUD. I hear my brother and his friends shouting. I’m trying to read my book, but have had to reread the same paragraph at least four times.
Why do they feel the need to shout? I groan. I’ll have to see what all the commotion is about or it will never end. My Nana is out of town, so Jensen decided it would be fun to throw a party. It feels like he invited the entire school.
Not annoying… at all.
I get off my bed and place my book on my bedside table.
The Notebook will have to wait...
I close the door behind me out of hope that no drunk people will try to go into my room.
I’m surprised the house hasn’t burned down with all the parties Jensen throws. Nana has no idea about these parties because my brother is secretive about it. I’ll never rat out Jensen.
What’s that saying?
Snitches get stiches.
Yeah, my mouth is sealed shut.
I have no plans of opening it.
I pass a couple practically having sex on the staircase, and it makes me second guess my resolve to let Jensen have his way. I pull my nose up at them. They don’t even realize I’m here.
Can’t they do that somewhere else?
I make my way down to where I hear Jensen’s voice, booming through the house in the family room.
He tells someone to grab him another beer.
How many has he had?
He has a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other when I enter the family room.
This is his new rebellious stage.
He thinks that since our parents have passed away no one can tell him how to live his life. Nana has given up. I’m certain he’ll send her to an early grave if he keeps this up. Jensen isn’t the same. He had colleges lined up and was planning his future but now he doesn’t care. I often wonder if this is his way of hiding the pain over the loss of our parents. Is it a coping mechanism?
He blows out smoke as I get closer to him. He pulls some blonde chick into him and licks the side of her face. She giggles an annoying high-pitched squawk.
It makes me gag.
I frown at him.
Really?
“H-ey C-haarrrl-i.” Tyler slurs when he notices me.
I give him a small smile.
He is gorgeous, so he gets away with everything.
“Damn baby! When did you get so fucking exquisite?” Lucas says. He smirks and winks at me.
Jensen glares at him.
“Shut the fuck up.”
He punches Lucas in the arm. Lucas laughs and clutches his arm.
If my brother’s friends have one thing in common, it is they flirt shamelessly with anything female. Jensen’s friends especially flirt with me to rile him up. They find endless enjoyment out of it.
“What do you want, Charli?” Jensen asks.
There went my fun-loving big brother. He has traded that person in for a moody and grumpy jerk.
“The music is a little loud don’t you think? And do you guys have to shout so loud?” I ask.
Jensen shoots up from his spot on the couch.
He stumbles, but quickly steadies himself on Lucas, who sits next to him. Yeah, I think to myself, he’s drunk.
“You’re not Mom or Dad. You’re my kid sister. So, go back to that, because that’s what you are. You think I’m going to listen to you? Get the heck out of here, Charli.”
I cross my arms and take a step back as he loses his balance and falls onto the couch. I squint, and sure enough, he has bloodshot eyes. They are so red. How can he even see out of them?
“Wait a minute,” I say, not sure if I really want to know the answer to my question. “Are you high?”
“Get the fuck out… FUCK,” he roars.
He slams his fist down on the coffee table in front of him. It makes me and everyone else jump. My brother would never physically hurt me, but the look of anger on his face frightens me.
“You’re a fucking kid, stay out of my business,” he says. He runs his fingers through his thick hair. His deep breath tells me he’s starting to lose control.
That hurts. Considering how our lives turned out, I consider myself pretty grown up. I may not party crazy hard like my classmates did but that doesn’t make me a child. I thought keeping to myself in my bedroom to read during these types of parties made me more mature.
I hold back tears.
We have talked so much and he had been so strong for me since our parent’s accident. He has never raised his voice at me, not even when we were kids. He isn’t the same and I hope this phase will pass on. I want my fun-loving, carefree brother back.
I see Carter and Christian out of the corner of my eye going from Jensen then back to me. They must be wondering if a fight between us is about to break out. They know we used to be close. They also know he’s never raised his voice at me, well, until now.
Jensen wraps his arm around the girl he was licking before she starts rubbing her hand over his thigh slowly bringing it to rest on his groin.
I know that’s my cue, and I leave. I make my way to the bathroom to wash up and get ready for bed. I will have to lock my door again so no drunk people try to find my bed in the middle of the night. I refuse to make that mistake again. At the last party Jensen threw, I found a couple in the middle of—well—you know.
I turn the handle of the bathroom door. It opens, so I assumed it is empty.
I stop in my tracks as my eyes find Eli.
My eyes take in the scene before me, Eli is leaning against the sink and a girl is on her knees in front of him. His head is thrown back, his eyes closed. His hand is tangled in her hair. I may not have had sex yet but I know she is giving him a blowjob, her head is moving back and forth as Eli’s hand keep hold of her head. He throws his head back as he moans.
“Fuck, Amber.”
I freeze like a statue, captivated by what was happening in front of me.
I should turn and walk away. It is like a horrible scene in a movie where you can’t take your eyes off it. They are both fully dressed, but the image of Eli’s penis in her mouth is impossible to ignore.
I swallow the lump in my throat and hope my racing heartbeat can’t be heard by Eli and his companion.
Eli’s head falls forward and his piercing eyes meet mine. He doesn’t tell me to get out, he doesn’t stop the girl, if anything his grip on her head tightens and he doesn’t take his eyes off mine. Her head bobs up and down as she swallows him, his teeth grip his lip as his breath gets heavy.
“Fuck, baby, take it,” he says to the girl. He pushes himself deeper and holds my gaze. I stand there and watch as Eli’s grip on the girl’
s head tightens even more, as he pushes himself in and out of her mouth.
Doesn’t that hurt her hair? Does it feel good wrapping her lips around him? I want to know these things. She doesn’t stop; she just lets him shove his penis down her throat. Doesn’t that hurt? I mean, I can only see some of Eli’s penis now as most of it is buried in this girl’s mouth but I’ve seen the outline My imagination has gone wild with thoughts of what it looks like. I can tell he’s very well equipped. He throws his head back again.
“Fuck,” he breathes.
I’m not sure why I’m watching this I can’t stop.
His arm muscles flex as he grips the girl’s head. I don’t know her, but I already know I hate her. Eli is everything I want and more.
His hips push forward faster as her head goes back and forth and then he grunts. He stops, holding still as his growl tells me he’s cumming in this girl’s mouth.
My first thought is, what does he taste like? My second thought, I want to do that to him. I want make him feel like that.
She pulls back and Eli fixes himself. I make a quick exit. I don’t want to listen to what they talk about and I certainly don’t want to be there when she realizes they were putting on a show. I’m so embarrassed for watching.
My cheeks are flushed I don’t have to check in a mirror to know that. Even though I wish that was me on my knees in front of Eli giving him that pleasure, it was still hot to watch. I have never had a crush before but with Eli I fell hard and fast. It all started when he stopped treating me like a little girl. He’d wink at me, flirt constantly, and I’d catch him looking at me. His eyes would travel over my body sending goosebumps over my skin.
I head to my room to get away from what I just watched in there. I can’t explain it to myself let alone to Eli if he asked. Why did I watch? I’m not sure because it should have been the last thing I wanted to do.
I should be embarrassed, but I’m not. I mean, I just watched the guy I have a crush on get a BJ from another girl. I should be heartbroken that he stood there and let me watch the whole time as another girl savoured him.
I sit down on my bed and cross my legs. A soft knock interrupts me, and I look up, hoping I’m not about to tell someone to go away, my room isn’t a place they can get off in.
Eli walks in not waiting for my answer and closes the door behind him he clicks the latch it’s so loud in my quiet room. He stands there his hands in his pockets and looks at me. His eyes travel up the full length of my body before he meets my eyes. His eyes bore into mine as he doesn’t say anything just watches me. I swallow as my nerves creep up, my heart is beating so fast I can’t breathe. Is he mad I walked in? Is he mad that I stayed?
“You liked that, Charli.”
It’s not a question. He slowly makes his way to my bed. He sits down next to me raising his eyebrows as if waiting for my answer.
“You like watching me get my dick sucked?”
I nod slowly before I even have time to tell my brain to say something intelligent.
He smirks.
“Charli, Charli, Charli.” He says shaking his head, making a tsking sound
His finger brushes my cheek as he reaches for a piece of hair that’s fallen from my hair tie.
His touch ignites my body and I feel like I’m soaring across the sky.
He leans into me his lips inches from mine.
He’s going to kiss me, please let this be real.
He pulls back just before our lips touch, his mouth widens into a devastating smile his hand rest on my arm like he’s holding me in place, it makes me feel safe. His smile turns to a hardened frown his forehead creases.
“You’re a naughty girl, Charli. You want to suck my dick, don’t you?”
His lips so close to mine that if I just inch forward a little, they’d be touching. I nod, answering his question. He pulls back, frowning at me.
“That shit isn’t for you, stay away from it.”
I frown at him, unsure of what he means.
“I’m no good for you, sweetheart. And I can’t give you what you deserve, that back there.” He says, nodding his head towards my door.
“That’s all I do, I fuck, and don’t give back. My heart isn’t available; it never will be. Not for little miss perfect, anyway.”
His eyes fall from mine, and then he moves away from me as if I’m a disease he has to stay flee from.
My heart hurts. Eli has always been blunt. He says what he thinks, and means what he says. He doesn’t hold anything back. Sometimes what he says really hurts me emotionally and physically I feel like he’s just torn my beating heart from my chest at those simple words. He will never be available. Not even for me. What does that mean?
Does he know about my crush on him? So much for the kiss I thought we were about to share. I’m so stupid to think anything would ever happen between us
Chapter 3
ELI
Twent-one yersold
I‘M SUPPOSED TO BE hanging out with Jensen, watching the game for a pizza and beer night. Until he got called into work; the perks of being an intern I guess.
But instead, I sit next to an angel.
She is fucking perfection.
As if she can hear my thoughts, Charli looks my way and
smiles in her beautiful, angelic way. My heart twists like someone is digging a knife into me.
Yeah, I’m fucked.
Charli came over just as Jensen was leaving. I told him I’d sit with her for a while. That was a mistake. A huge mistake. How did I think I could just sit here and not be tempted to stare at her? How could I not want to run my hands over that glorious body of hers—every sweet inch of it?
She has on a tiny pair of shorts and a tank top that hugs her breasts.
My eyes travel up her legs and land on her perfect tits. Her nipples poking through the fabric. My cock jumps in my pants, eager for a taste.
She doesn’t have a bra on.
My cock aches to be inside her sweet pussy.
Charli really needs to put on a damn bra.
I have had this internal battle since Charli turned eighteen. It’s like my dick has a radar on her, and he has been permanently hard ever since.
It doesn’t help when she wears clothes that show off her body. The struggle to keep my hands to myself was difficult, but I’ve been good. I’ve kept my hands to myself even though all I want to do is run them all over her body, touch every inch of her, caress her perfect body and bury my head between her legs. To make her scream out my name repeatedly as I take what’s mine…
Her pleasure.
She releases a sigh and I break eye contact with her body.
Fucking smooth, Eli.
My tongue darts out, wetting my lips. I can see her out of the corner of my eye, the way her chest moves her tits with every rise and fall of every breath. Her feet are tucked under her as her eyes stay on the television.
I wonder if she knows how I feel.
She is off limits, dip shit.
She is my best friend’s little sister. I have zero right to act on my feelings.
I swallow hard and stretch my hands above my head so I have something to do. My hands need to stay busy so they won’t grab Charli. My shirt rides up and bares my stomach. I don’t miss the intake of breath she inhales. I know my body is in good shape. I’ve had numerous women tell me over the years how ripped my stomach is.
Honestly, I enjoy staying in shape because I enjoy being fit. The way Charli has looked at me over the years is just a bonus.
“Eli…” Charli says softly.
My insides curl in excitement.
I turn to her. She seems pained, somehow.
I swallow again.
Her tank top has moved slightly, giving me a view of her stomach. I swear she has no panties on under her shorts. She should put on under garments. Damn it.
“Are you mad Jensen isn’t here and it’s me you’re hanging out with?” she asks me, as if she’s disappointing me.
I snap
my head up to meet her gaze with mine.
Keeping my eyes off her body long enough to have talk to her without ogling her is damn near impossible.
I shake my head.
“What? No Charli, it’s not you.”
I shifted in my spot, my cock twitches in my pants.
I could see her struggling with what I just said. Does she really think I’m annoyed that I’m hanging out with her? My eyes go to my cock, telling him to calm the fuck down.
“What’s wrong with me?” She asks, and twists her hands in her lap.
I shoot my eyes to her, frowning at what she had just said.
“Nothing is wrong with you, Mad.”
She bits her lip. My erection jumps.
“Then why won’t you look at me?”
She makes this real hard. I can’t stop staring at her.
She thinks I can’t look at her but it’s the opposite.
I smirk at her.
She frowns.
“This isn’t funny.”
My lips turn up again. I love that she can make me smile.
“Charli, I can’t stop fucking looking at you, that’s what’s funny. You think I can’t look at you? I can’t take my fucking eyes off you, sweetheart.”
Her mouth opens in a big ‘O’ and makes me smile again.
She is clueless. She is gorgeous always, has been but she doesn’t see how beautiful she really is. Jensen has had to keep guys at school off her for years. He’d warn them and his friends that she was off limits and if any of us touched her he’d break every bone in our bodies.
Jensen can be a little overprotective, but if I had a little sister and she looked like Charli, I’d be over protective, too.
She moves closer to me and her hand slides up my leg.
Not a good idea.
I swallow hard. My throat is suddenly dry as a desert.
My heart starts beating so fast. I’m sure it is about to beat through my chest and land in her lap.