Every instinct I had screamed at me to refuse. To tuck the dog under my arm and make a break for it. But I was shirtless in a crowd of six police officers ready to run me down, and what would happen to Jessie then? If they forced me to let her go by the side of the busy road? Or hit her with their batons when they were aiming for me?
Those batons hurt. I didn’t remember the officer who’d once arrested me, but the sting of a police baton hitting my ribs hadn’t gone anywhere. My subconscious was a bitch.
I handed the dog over, but I couldn’t watch as the police took her back to Keane. I turned away and lit a smoke with shaky hands. The buzz of adrenaline faded. Fight or flight became a slump that made me feel sick. I heard the slam of car doors and the gentle purr of the expensive Range Rover. It hummed past me, and I felt eyes on me as it left the car park. Odds were this wasn’t over.
“Billy.” Luke came up behind me. “You’re bleeding.”
“Hmm?”
Luke gripped my wrist. “Your hand. Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up.”
He pulled me out of the car park and back to where the van was parked beneath Rushmere’s tallest sycamore tree. Away from the blazing sun, perspective returned to me, and the reality that I’d just handed Keane’s dog back to face her fate punched me in the gut.
I fought Luke’s hold on me.
Stronger than me, in every sense of the word, he held me firm. “Don’t. Whatever you’re thinking, just don’t. You’ll only make things worse for everyone.”
“I don’t care about everyone.”
“I know you don’t. But I’m asking you not to go after that bastard right now, okay? I need you with me at least until Mia gets here.”
“She doesn’t care about everyone either.”
“I know that too, I’m just asking you to stay with me.”
I was missing something. Luke was a bad liar, and he wielded deflection better than anyone I’d ever known. But he had eyes that spoke only truth, and as he stared me down, something settled in my chest. I had no fucking clue what was going on, but trust bloomed like an errant thought did on my most anxious days. It pollinated and sprouted roots, and I found myself nodding, despite the fight still alive and well in my gut. “What are you, like, hypnotising me or something?”
Luke’s frown deepened. “What?”
“Never mind. I’ll stay, all right? But I still want to burn that prick’s house down.”
“Tell you what, if you feel that way by tonight, I’ll give you the fucking matches.”
Definitely missing something. But I let it go. I was out of practice at getting lairy with people, and the comedown was leaving me dizzy. Sharp edges felt blunt.
Luke sat me in the back of the van and disappeared. He came back with the T-shirt I’d used to wrap around my hand when I’d smashed the car window, and shook the glass from it. It was splattered with blood but otherwise had survived.
I claimed it and shrugged it on.
Luke shook his head. “How’d you manage that without smearing blood everywhere?”
“Blood?” I followed his gaze to my knuckles. They weren’t badly cut, but sticky blood was oozing from the scrapes and nicks. “Oh. I didn’t notice. That’s what you meant by cleaned up, huh?”
“No, that’s what I meant by ‘you’re bleeding.’” Luke climbed over me and rummaged around in the van. He turned up a first aid kit and returned to do his best Florence Nightingale impression.
He dabbed my knuckles with an antiseptic wipe, while I watched, morbidly fascinated by the sight of my own blood. I’d always been a weirdo like that. For years I’d told anyone close enough to listen that I enjoyed pain. Then I’d fallen off a garage roof and smashed my shoulder to bits, and spent the next six months eating my words.
A shudder passed through me. Out of habit, I looked for Gus to comfort me, but he wasn’t there. In fact, I hadn’t seen him since he’d pressed a bottle of water into my hands to put over Jessie’s back. “Where’d Gus go?”
Luke kept his steady gaze on my knuckles. “I don’t know. Back to work, maybe? Mia’s deliveries are stacked today.”
I knew that. It was why I was spending my Saturday up to my elbows in petals and grief, but it didn’t explain his fleeting appearance at the fair. I’d assumed he was done. Where the hell had he gone? “Maybe he went to get lunch. He seemed pretty hangry back there.”
“He does get emotional when he skips a snack.”
“What’s your excuse?”
“Same as yours, brother. I’m an arsehole.”
I’d called Luke worse many, many times, but I’d never meant it. Or at least, he was the sweetest, kindest arsehole I’d ever met.
I let him finish cleaning my hands, then I gave him a hug that seemed to take his breath away. I squeezed him hard. Cos that’s what you were supposed to do with people you loved. Hold them tight, and never let them go.
Gus
I eased Mia’s crappy hatchback into the northbound motorway traffic and called Luke from the ancient hands-free contraption she’d taped to the dashboard. “It’s done. My cousin will have her in Brittany by the morning.”
“She wasn’t chipped?”
“Nope. Just that fancy-pants collar.”
“What did you do with it?”
“Tossed it in the sea.”
“Good man.”
“Am I? I just stole someone’s dog.”
Luke snorted. “Nah. You just rescued a dog from people who would rather go shopping than take care of it. If they gave a crap, you wouldn’t have been able to lift her from the garden in the first place.”
“True that.”
“And you stopped Billy from doing something really fucking stupid. I know he seemed pretty reasonable earlier, but it won’t last. I give it till midnight before he’s hatching a plan to do what you’ve just done, but without the cousin in Kent willing to forge a pet passport, and definitely with more violence.”
“That’s not fair. Billy’s not violent.”
Luke sighed. “Look, I appreciate you trying to believe that, but it’s not true. He kicked someone in the head the day before he got here—”
“He had good reason.”
“Agreed. But that’s my point. There’s always a reason, good or otherwise. That kid doesn’t know how to solve a problem without making it a hundred times worse.”
“Maybe he needs his big brother to teach him.”
“Doubt it. I’m a hundred times worse than he’ll ever be.”
“Because you’re a reticent motherfucker?”
“Given that you don’t swear unless you’re plastered, and you’ve never used the word reticent in your entire life, I’m gonna assume you’re throwing Billy’s words at me.”
“Okay, you got me.”
Luke huffed out a laugh. It was hard to tell if he meant it. “Whatever. Just keep him close tonight, or closer than you already do. There’s gonna be some blowback on this for sure, so he’s gonna need an alibi.”
“What about me? Don’t I need an alibi too?”
“Nah. You’re the nicest guy in the world, mate. No one’s going to think you stole a man’s dog.”
Luke hung up, leaving me to ponder the closer than you already do. Though it didn’t take a genius to figure out that Mia had probably discussed her suspicions with him at great length over dinner, or whatever they did when they weren’t fighting or making up. My sister was the only person on earth who could make being deliriously happy look like hard work.
Grumbling, I changed lanes, gazing longingly at KFC as I passed the service station. I’d long ago accepted that I’d do anything for Billy—Luke too—but missing lunch and dinner was about my limit. Screw it. I’m getting a pizza on the way home. But as hungry as I was, I couldn’t go another minute without seeing Billy.
I ditched Mia’s car in Luke’
s garage and jogged home, searching for any reason I could give for bursting in the front door and scooping Billy up in the kind of bear hug he deserved. The cul-de-sac I lived on was quiet. Only the neighbourhood cats raised hell. Billy occupied my mind so entirely, I didn’t notice the blue lights until I was almost on top of the riot van.
For the second time that day, the police were waiting for me, and this time they were outside my house.
Chapter Nineteen
Gus
The police tossed my house. They even looked in the loft. For a dog. As if we’d rolled her up in cavity insulation and tucked her behind the hot water tank. I’d never been on the hate-the-police bandwagon, but these representatives of the county’s finest were absolute clowns.
They pinned Billy to the side of the riot van and searched him but found nothing in his pockets at all, not even a handful of change.
I laughed. “What are you even looking for?”
An officer spared me a glance. “We’ve had reports of a dog stolen from Linwood Drive. It belongs to someone Mr. Daley had an altercation with this afternoon.”
“At the fair,” Billy supplied helpfully, like I didn’t know. “I smashed his car window to let the dog out because it was dying of heat exhaustion, and now they reckon I went back to his house and nicked it.”
“When?”
“Sometime around six.”
“You were still at the fair, though. Surely the whole town can vouch for you?”
“The fucking mayor can vouch for me. I was stood next to the boring bastard for an hour while he leered at your sister.”
I cringed. “Nice. Was Luke there too?”
“Yeah. But Mia made him stand at the back so he didn’t deck anyone.”
I kind of wished Luke had punched the lecherous old mayor, but right then it was more important that he’d been seen. I’d already messaged an old flame from Grindr who’d give me reason to be seen in Kent if I needed it. As far as I could see, all bases were covered, though, to be honest, I hadn’t imagined the police taking the case of the missing dog as seriously as they seemed to be.
The search teams moved onto the garage. I rolled my eyes and approached the officer in charge. “Can I see your warrant?”
“We don’t need a warrant if we’re granted entry.”
“Billy let you in?”
“Yes. Are you the owner of the property?”
“I am.”
“And are you refusing us access?”
“No, you can look anywhere you want. I was just curious as to how you’d officially worded your reasons, because as far as I can see, you don’t have any, and that’s harassment.”
“Do you want to make a complaint?”
“Not yet. But you need to let Billy go. He hasn’t done anything wrong.”
“The dog is still missing.”
“Yeah. The same dog who was left in a boiling hot car all morning. Don’t you think it’s more likely they left the front door open or something?”
The officer ignored me, and it was probably the most pointless conversation I’d ever had, but a few minutes later Billy was released, and the search was called off. By then, my neighbours were making popcorn. I waved to them, locked the garage door, and dragged Billy inside to watch the police drive away from the living room window.
I blew out a breath. “Well, that was fun.”
Billy chewed on his lip. “I’m really sorry. I had no idea it’d go this far when I broke the window. I didn’t think of the impact it would have on you.”
“What impact? They opened a few cupboards. It wasn’t like it was a full drugs bust.”
“Could’ve been, though. It’s only cos you’ve got me all clean living that I didn’t have an ounce of weed stuffed in my sock.”
“But you didn’t have an ounce of weed stuffed anywhere...did you?”
“No.”
“Then there’s no problem here. They’re harassing you because Keane’s a middle-class white man who can cause them more grief than you. That’s all. Remember when Luke left the handbrake off the van and it rolled into that Mercedes—no, of course you don’t. You weren’t here. But it was the same thing. Three police cars for a fender bender, all because some rich idiot was jumping up and down.”
Billy shot me a strange look. “Why are you rambling?”
“I’m not rambling.”
“You’re totally rambling. Are you drunk?”
“Drunk? Why would you think that?”
“I just told you. Because you’re rambling about shit I don’t care about.”
“Charming.”
“I try.” A ghost of a grin warmed Billy’s face before he fell serious again. “I’m worried about Jessie, though. What if they dumped her? Or she really did escape and she’s out there somewhere?”
“They’d have found her if she was running loose. There were enough coppers out looking for her.”
“I’m gonna go out and look.”
“And get yourself caught lurking around Keane’s house? Billy, no. That’s ridiculous. Let the police deal with it.”
“They’re not dealing with it. They rocked up here because they thought they’d find something more exciting than a cocker spaniel. Why do you think they looked in the loft?”
“Um...for the dog?”
Billy rolled his eyes. “No, because they once found a giant cheese plant at my mum’s place. I got away with it because she said it was hers and she had no idea what it was, but they were after me for years after that.”
“And even more years have passed since. Jesus, how many of them even remember you?”
“At least one. David Keane. Surname sound familiar? You probably know his brother.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh. I’m sorry I let them into your house, though. I just figured if they went away and got a warrant, they’d come back and mess it up even worse.”
“I don’t mind that you let them in.”
“Seriously?”
I turned to face Billy. “Seriously. You’ve done nothing wrong. They can search the place every day, for all I care. Where’s Grey?”
“In the bathroom sink.”
“Again?”
“Yep.”
“Your cat is weird.”
“So are you.”
“How so?”
Billy shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Good answer.”
“It’s all I’ve got.”
I reached out and took his hand, twining our fingers together. “You’ve said that before, and the next day my fridge was full of food, so I’m not complaining.”
Billy stared at our joined hands. For a heart-stopping moment I wondered if he’d pull away, but he didn’t. He squeezed my fingers tight and raised our hands to knock my knuckles against his forehead.
His were cut and bloodied, and my heart couldn’t cope. He’d done the right thing for the right reasons, and he was still the one who’d got hurt.
I pulled him close, released his hand, and wrapped my arms around him. He fit against me like we’d been cut from the same mould, his sharp edges against my broader frame. It was so perfect, I couldn’t cope with that either. I shivered and buried my face in his neck, breathing him in, as if his scent could ground me.
It couldn’t. At least, not in the way I was asking it to. One lungful made my heart race. Two sent heat to my groin.
I started to back up, but Billy growled and held me tighter.
“Don’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Run away. I love that you want me. It makes me feel safe.”
“Safe?”
“Yeah.” It was Billy’s turn to shiver. “Don’t take it away from me because you’re scared of it.”
“I’m not scared of it.”
“L
iar.”
I didn’t want to argue with him. I wanted to kiss him and throw him over my shoulder as if he wasn’t barely a few inches shorter than me. I wanted to carry him upstairs.
I wanted everything.
Billy pulled back enough to look at me. He gripped my chin, and his gaze pierced holes in what little armour I had left. “I want to go upstairs with you and not go to sleep, but before I ask you to fuck me, will you tell me what you did with the dog?”
“What dog?”
“Gus.”
“Saying my name like that isn’t going make me answer that question.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’ve got nothing to worry about.”
“Promise?”
I gave in to the urge to kiss him, a sweet brush of lips that ignited the moment our mouths met. He stumbled back from the force of it, and I pressed him against the wall, kissing him until the need for air forced me to stop.
Breathless, I pressed my forehead to his, brain spinning, but with little conscious thought. I’d tried a hundred times to forget how my body craved him, but it was as impossible as forgetting how my heart cried out for him too, and he remained, as he had all the years since our first kiss, unforgotten. If that was even a word. Maybe I’d ask him later, when I could think straight.
He’d know.
He always did.
I found his hand again, and tangled my fingers with his. “Jessie’s safe, I promise. Don’t ask me any more than that. Just ask me to fuck you before I lose my goddamn mind.”
Billy
I had no idea what he’d done with that damn fucking dog, but as he took me by the hand and led me upstairs, it didn’t matter. His promise meant everything, and the slam of his bedroom door as he kicked it shut quieted the nerves rolling in my belly, shocking them into silence.
He stripped my clothes, and then his own, and it felt like the first time we’d been naked together all over again, except now I saw him with brand-new eyes. His strong body enchanted me, his forearms, biceps, and shoulders. His chest, and cut abdomen.
Unforgotten (Forgiven) Page 16