by Liz Schulte
I studied the profile of the woman I loved. Her beautiful eyes turned to me, but they were those of a stranger’s now, hollow and questioning.
“We have to leave for the demonstration,” she said as I opened my mouth to speak.
I welcomed the reprieve. I didn’t want to do this. I didn’t want to hurt Olivia further, whether or not she was an angel. It was easier to wait for her to come back, but the price was too high. I would do it, but it didn’t have to be this moment. “Ready when you are.”
She stared at me, her expression blank. “We should arrive together to show our united front.”
I nodded and offered her my arm, which she ignored. We walked to Xavier in silence. I glanced over at her, but her face was always the same: looking forward with a slight frown. I held the door open for her and she went through, then waited for me on the other side. She allowed me to lead her to Phoenix’s office. Already the crowd collecting in the club was loud. I glanced through the doorway as we passed. Every jinn there was excitedly discussing the prospects of being free. Olivia and I walked into my former office, my eyes lingering on where Phoenix had his scuffed shoes propped on my coffee table.
“About time,” he said, hopping up. “Let’s go.”
I didn’t move and Olivia stayed next to me, her jaw clenched. Repulsion painted her face at being near so many jinn. Her arms crossed over her chest as if not sure she could keep from killing them.
“Who is she freeing?” I asked.
“Me,” he said.
I shook my head. “Can’t. Too conspicuous. Pick someone Hell won’t miss right away.”
“No. No matter what you think, Hell knows. I want to be freed before they kill her.”
Olivia turned to him with an icy glare. “It doesn’t matter who I free so long as they follow me. We’re wasting time.”
Phoenix smiled and went out the door. Olivia started after him. “Don’t do this,” I said.
She paused. “You made a bargain for your soul, yes?”
So she knew about that. “Yes.”
She nodded and left me standing in the room with only my thoughts. She wasn’t doing this for me. She couldn’t be. Despite what she implied, the angel had no real attachment to me other than nostalgia from the time she witnessed Olivia and I together. Was she goading Hell? Trying to get them to take a bigger swipe at her? Femi’s instincts said something was off in the house they’d raided without me. Why did she go in tonight without a plan? I sighed and went downstairs to watch the show.
Phoenix stood in front of the crowd as I once had with Olivia standing next to him. Only this time she didn’t look nervous—more like she was standing in front of a heap of rotting flesh infested with maggots. I stood back and observed. They didn’t seek me or my approval in any way, too entranced with the hope of what she could do for them.
When it was time, her light grew around her and brightened until most of the jinn had to look away. I was used to it. Her eyes rolled back in her head and her entire body shook and strained as she reached toward Phoenix. Her hand didn’t stop at his skin, but went into him, through him. When she pulled back light exploded from his mouth, eyes, and ears, then washed over the room in a tidal wave. One by one all the jinn dropped to the ground. Phoenix was the last to crumble. Olivia blinked a few times, then scanned the room, a small smile etched on her face until she saw me, still standing. The smiled melted away.
She looked back at the motionless jinn bodies, then back to me then back to them one more time. Her forehead furrowed. . “Why were you not affected?”
I raised an eyebrow. “What did you do to them?”
“Returned his soul as I promised, but…”
But it knocked jinn out and she knew it. It had knocked them all out when she freed me too, but this time I withstood it. “Perhaps I’m immune because I’ve been through it before.”
She stepped over the bodies and walked out of the club. Once outside she transported to the warehouse, but I chose to walk. I needed to think about what I was going to say to her. I texted Baker and Femi to make sure neither of them came back right away. At the warehouse, I poured myself a drink and went to the very back cell where we kept all of our, mostly her, belongings. My eyes scanned the room until I found it, untouched since we moved here. I felt the weight of the camera bag more in my chest than I did in my hand as I carried it back out to the makeshift living room that did nothing to make this place feel like home.
I sat on the couch with the bag at my feet, the camera on the coffee table, hoping she would see it and connect, and then I took a long satisfying drink of whiskey.
“Why did it not affect you?” she asked from behind me.
I didn’t respond, letting her come to me. When she stood in front of me with her arms crossed over her chest I finally looked up. “I can’t keep doing this, Liv.”
She didn’t blink, merely stared.
Somewhere in there she had to understand what I was talking about, but there wasn’t even a flicker. “Baby, if you’re in there, you’ve got to let me know.” I went to her. She didn’t move nor did her expression change. I brushed the back of my fingers against her soft cheek and something flickered in her eyes before she took a step back. “I would’ve followed you anywhere, but—” My words failed as she looked up at me. I held my breath hoping to see another sign of recognition, or anything in her beautiful eyes, but she was still alien, sealing my resolve. “I won’t do this anymore.” I clenched my fingers into a fist as if I could hold on to the feel of her skin. I hadn’t planned on saying it but it slipped out. “I can’t stay and watch you go down this path without me, but I can’t follow you when I can barely recognize you.”
I waited, holding my breath, for her to say something, to acknowledge me in some familiar way. Anything at all would have kept me by her side. The seconds ticked into minutes and my heart broke. She was really gone.
I pressed my lips to her forehead. She flinched away. “Goodbye.” I forced one foot in front of the other toward the door.
“Why?” the angel asked. “Nothing has changed. I fulfilled your promise. I freed the jinni. We are eliminating the threat. Why leave now? I have only helped you.” I turned back toward her. “I do not look different. I am more powerful than ever before. You claim to love us yet you choose to abandon us. Why should I let you leave?”
I shook my head. “I don’t love Olivia for the way she looks or how strong she is.”
“Then why?”
I turned back to her. “Because of who she is. There isn’t just one reason. Every day I know her is another reason to love her. She makes me want to be a better person. She sees the best in everyone and as much as that drives me crazy, it’s one of the many reasons why I love her.” The angel was listening which spurred me on. “She helps people. Not to look good or to prove to people what a good person she is, but because she means it. I love her for a thousand reasons you won’t understand. Reasons I don’t fully understand, but I know I miss her and I know that none of us are going to make it through this without her. You are powerful, but you aren’t her.”
“Kindness does not win wars.”
I nodded. “Neither does blind vengeance—a lesson I’ve learned to well.”
Her head inclined slightly. “I will not allow you to leave me. You helped start this war. Had you stayed in your proper position, none of this would have happened and I wouldn’t have given up my life for the two of you. You will see this war through until the end.”
I shook my head. “Wouldn’t count on it. If there is no Olivia, there is no me, and as far as I can tell, she’s gone.”
A dangerous glint sparked in her eyes. “You will stay.”
“Give me a reason why.” I picked up the camera and snapped her picture.
The angel jerked at the flash. “What are you doing?”
I took the camera to her and held it up so she could see the picture of herself. She averted her eyes. “If you’re in there, Liv, look at it. This is who you ar
e now. Is this who you want to be?”
“You will not leave,” she said, still refusing to look at the camera.
“Look at the fucking picture.” I took her face in my hand and forced her to look at it.
Her eyes connected with the picture, and for a second my Olivia flashed in the angel’s face. Her features softened, the light retreating for just an instant, before she jerked away, hitting the camera out of my hands and smashing it against the wall. Anger coiled inside of me and I grabbed her shoulders. I fought myself for control and the angel’s knit brow suggested she was fighting her own internal battle, but she did not pull away this time.
“Is this who you want to be, Liv? Is this the life you want to live? Say the word and I’m with you all the way, but I have to know you’re still there.” I kept a tight hold on her, pulling her closer until my breath moved her hair.
“Please,” I whispered.
A finger brushed against my chest. Just one finger lightly, gently touching me. I didn’t want to look at her, afraid I might still see the angel, but I had to. I caught her face in my hands and tilted it up.
“Holden,” Olivia rasped in a strained voice, but it was hers. It was hers. A tear spilled over the edge of her eye and ran down her cheek.
I pressed my lips to hers. Kissing her hard and deep, forcing her to feel and take. Her lips were unmoving and hard beneath mine, but again she didn’t pull away. I kissed her even harder, willing everything I felt, everything I feared into her. Her lips parted slightly at the shock of it, and an instant later she softened, kissing me back. I eased back on the kiss changing the texture to gentle and slower, cherishing her the way I hadn’t been able to in far too long.
I ran my fingers through her hair and her hands pressed flat against my chest, her fingers digging into my shirt. The light that represented her in my mind began to grow and brighten. She was opening our communication connection again—
And then it slammed shut once more, and Olivia shoved me away, hard.
The angel stood in front of me, her shoulders heaving and her eyes bright and glaring daggers.
I advanced slowly. “She’s in there. You have to let her out.”
“Do not test me, jinni.”
My phone rang. There were too many wheels in motion to ignore it, but this was far from over. Olivia was alive and well. The angel wasn’t all-powerful after all. I could get her back.
Femi waited for me on the stoop—something she could do since most humans couldn’t see her. I, on the other hand, was a nosy old woman’s dream. I could practically feel the milky cataracts drilling into me as I ran up the steps and pretended to knock before going inside.
I whistled through my teeth. “Swanky joint.”
Femi rolled her eyes. “This place gives me the creeps.”
I looked around the mostly empty rooms. The house was older, probably built as a single family residence back in the day then later split into two apartments, like a lot of the older homes when the populations boomed and real estate went through the roof. I didn’t feel anything particularly strange here though. It was just an empty house with a lot of dead demon ash on the floor. “I’m not really sensing what you are, kitten.”
She perched her hands on her hips. “Down here isn’t as bad. Come upstairs.”
She took the narrow, steep stairs two at a time. Her long legs were hugged-tight by low slung, soft leather and a sexy top left most of her back exposed. Her bronze skin begged to be touched but also promised an elbow to the face.
“I can feel you staring at me,” she said.
“Sorry, doll.” I averted my eyes.
She turned around and winked. “I didn’t say you had to stop.”
Stepping into the room snapped me back to attention. She was right. Something did feel off. There was a lack of something here, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. “How did we find out about this place?” I asked her.
Her eyes met mine. “We didn’t. Olivia did—then she showed up out of the blue and killed everyone. There wasn’t even the full group here.”
Definitely strange. As if on cue the boss texted me. “Holden says we shouldn’t come back for a while.”
She nodded. “You think he’s confronting her?”
“Probably. Let’s get this stuff and take it somewhere else.”
“You feel it too, though, right? It’s hollow here.”
I nodded. “Yeah. You’re on to somethin’, but hell if I know what. Some things are best left untouched. Let’s get out of here.”
We made short work of shoving all the papers, maps and anything else we came across into Femi’s messenger bag. I followed her toward the much larger and safer car I’d liberated for her. The roadster was an egg, but this boat could take down a brick wall. I smiled a little. Despite what she said and the attitude she projected, maybe Femi did recognize the need for caution, at least every now and then, because she was still driving it.
“Want to grab dinner?” I asked.
“Like you even need to ask.”
We decided on a nearby restaurant that was open 24 hours. At this time of night it wasn’t crowded and the few people scattered around were three sheets to the wind. I ordered for both of us after Femi told me what she wanted. It wasn’t a dominating thing, the waitress never even glanced in Femi’s direction nor did she blink an eye at me ordering two meals and picking the most secluded booth. Must have looked hungry.
Femi stretched her arms across the back of her booth. “I don’t know if we should trust anything that comes out of that house.”
I nodded. “It’s hard to say. I don’t want to get in a lather about this until we get the angel’s perspective on it.”
Femi frowned. “I gotta be honest with you, Baker. I’m trusting her and her judgment less and less.”
I shrugged. “She’s an angel. You can’t expect her to react like Olivia. She’s old, really old, like a total face stretcher. Dollars to donuts she has her own motive here that she isn’t sharing with us, but I don’t think it’s nefarious. Angels tend to be good eggs. Whatever her plan is, you can trust that she thinks it’s for the best.”
“She pointed us toward that house. Why did she attack it without Holden? What’s she looking for and what does she want? I don’t believe for a second that it is to help Holden.”
Femi was sure in a twist about the angel. Me? I wasn’t so sure. Yeah, it might be involved in some conspiracy, but it also might not be. The house felt strange and hollow, as she said, but it was a place demons had been living and scheming. Who knows what they’d done between those four brick walls. If I was pointing fingers, it would be at them and not the angel. “We’ll run it by Holden and see what he wants to do. But I stand by the fact that I trust the angel not to do anything evil.”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “You’re the one who wanted to do the intervention. You obviously can’t trust her that much.”
“That’s different, kitten. I trust the angel is probably on our side. She probably isn’t conspiring with Lucifer or anything, but I don’t want to see Olivia go away forever. I like the angel, but I like Olivia more. The boss needs her. Hell, the world probably needs her in it. The angel doesn’t belong here. I’m just setting things right before someone else gets a mind to.”
The waitress dropped off the plates, not making eye contact, then went back behind the counter and resumed watching television. Femi already had a chicken finger in her claws and was munching on it by the time I looked back to her.
My phone rang. It was Maggie. The urge to screen her was strong. I liked the girl, but she was wearing me out. “Hey, baby,” I answered.
“Hey.” Her voice was low, a little sad.
I held back a sigh. I was an asshole, I knew it, but Maggie and I weren’t a good fit. Back when she didn’t know about the Abyss, she was an escape for me. I had lived as a human for a long time and it was nice to revisit that. It was like losing myself in nostalgia, but still having the thrill of danger an
d secrecy. Now that she knew everything, the problems were too clear. She couldn’t be with me. I put her life in danger and she couldn’t take care of herself; instead of being an escape, she was a burden. As I said, I was the asshole here. “What’s shaking?”
“It sounds like you’re out.”
“What do you need, Maggie?”
She hemmed and hawed for a while before she came out with it. “You ruined my life. I see things now. Walking down the street I see stuff, creatures that scare me, but I can’t react to them. And you never want to talk about any of this, though you’re the only person I know who can see this stuff too. I don’t even know what you guys are doing now. If you would just let me help…”
“You get used to things. The more I tell you, the more dangerous it is for you. You got to trust me on this, doll. Just pretend it isn’t there and eventually you’ll stop seeing it.” I didn’t know if that was true or not, but it sounded good.
She sighed. “Why can’t I help? I helped before.”
“We’re in a different place right now. You need to lay low.”
She blew her nose. “Why did you tell me any of this, if you were just going to break up with me as soon as I knew?”
“I’m sorry,” I said for about the hundredth time. When I told her, I was dumb. I wanted to be in love. I thought it could work, but every day, every minute, it became clearer that it couldn’t. Not really.
“Whatever.” She hung up.
Femi flashed me a grin. “So what’s the deal with you and the human? You still a thing?” she asked between bites.
Femi never called Maggie by her name, always “the human” pointing out our mismatch that I should have seen coming. The thing was I liked humans. I was used to humans. Over the last hundred or so years I had mainly lived with and worked with humans. Yes, they had short lives and a limited worldview, but they also had passion. They embraced their lives and accomplished amazing things in the short amount of productive time they had.