That doesn’t mean that acknowledging all of this is easy. No.
As I flick through all these thoughts in my mind, panic takes hold of me. I want to run. Boy, do I. But I don’t. Instead, I get out of the car and face my punishment head-on, which is definitely a first for me.
4
West
I have never been so turned on in my life than while I was making out with Alexis in my car. The way she tastes, the way she kept shivering every time I grazed my teeth along the side of her neck, I felt like I was about to explode. But, in the back of my mind, part of me whispered to stop, that Lex and I need to talk about what Ellis discovered about her blackmailer.
Then she rolled her hips against mine, and I damn near lost it.
I wanted her so much.
I want her so much.
I want to kiss her all the time.
I want to taste her lips until it’s all I can taste.
But it’s not just kissing her that gets me going. No, it’s the way that she talks to me and looks at me sometimes, like she cares. It’s part of the reason I fell for her—that beneath her trying-to-be-all-badass, I-don’t-give-a-shit-about-anything exterior, she has the sweetest heart. Not that she isn’t badass. She’s probably the most badass girl I’ve ever met. Strong as hell, too. I just hope that when I tell her what I found out about her blackmailer, she won’t put that wall up around herself again.
God, I hate Blaine, I think to myself as I sit in afterschool detention. But the person I hate the most? Jay.
I briefly saw him in the hallway earlier today, laughing with his friends like he doesn’t have a care in the world. It made rage simmer underneath my skin. After seeing that video, after finding out what he did to Lex, I want nothing more than to beat his fucking ass. And while Lex may have told me not to do anything, I fully plan on doing something. I just need a plan and a way not to get caught.
Lex is sitting in a desk toward the front of the classroom, due to the hall monitor’s request that we shouldn’t be allowed to sit together. We also have afterschool detention and lunch detention for the next week. While I’m not too worried about myself, considering I’ve basically cut ties with my parents, I am concerned Lex is going to get in a lot of trouble, especially since she just got busted for that whole spray painting thing. Not to mention the fact that somehow people have found out about our little make-out session in the car and rumors are floating around. Not that I give a shit. But Lex might. Though, she didn’t seem that freaked out when I kissed her in front of Masie, an impulsive decision I made when I saw Masie basically telling the entire school that Lex was in love with Blaine. And I know the bitch did it on purpose to humiliate Lex. She might not be able to see it, and I’m not about to tell her, but Masie is the kind of person who makes herself feel better by putting down the people around her. She’s been doing that shit to Lex for years now.
Anyway, I haven’t gotten a chance to talk to Lex since we were caught making out. The hall monitor made a point to escort us to class, and then we had lunch detention that lasted until the bell rang and she basically ran out of the classroom. I texted her during fifth period, but she never replied. And I didn’t see her again until she walked into afterschool detention. She didn’t even meet my gaze when she hurried in. I’ll admit that has me worried.
Sneaking a glance up at the teacher monitoring detention, I dig out my phone and send her a text, ignoring all the messages I’ve receive from Loraine and Eli. While I know I’ll probably have to read them eventually, I don’t want to deal with them just yet.
No, what I want to focus on right now is Lex.
Me: You doing okay up there?
She jolts a little as the message buzzes through. Then, holding her phone underneath the desk, she discreetly reads the message. She doesn’t answer right away, and my worry grows that maybe she isn’t going to. Then my phone vibrates in my hand.
Lex: Yeah. What about you?
I chew on my lip, deliberating how I want to reply. Should I be careful and just keep my answer simple? Or should I be open and flirty with her? Be who I am. Normally, I’d be cautious with her, not wanting to scare her off. But, after what happened in the car between us …
Me: I’m doing fucking great, actually. It’s amazing how detention isn’t as bad when you’ve got all these sexy as hell memories to play on repeat in your head.
I hit send and wait for her response. It takes her about a minute to do so, but it’s worth it.
Lex: Yeah, well, I’ve got more than just the memories to remind me. There are reminders all over my neck.
A smile curves at my lips.
Me: I gave you hickeys, huh?
I glance up at her and find her sweeping her hair across her shoulder, probably in an attempt to hide the hickeys.
Lex: Yeah. I tried to cover them up before I came here, but it’s a lost cause. Probably doesn’t really matter anyway, since everyone found out about what happened. Though I have no idea how.
Me: I didn’t tell anyone, I swear.
Lex: I didn’t think it was you.
The fact that she didn’t automatically accuse me makes my heart do weird things.
Me: I’m pretty sure someone saw us. Well, other than Cranky Pants Mcgee, the good old creepy hall monitor.
Lex: What’s really creepy is that who knows how long she stood there watching us before tapping on the window.
I smash my lips together, holding back a laugh.
Me: Wow, you’ve got quite the little perverted mind, Alexis Baker.
Lex: Probably because I’ve been hanging out with you so much lately.
Me: Hanging out? Is that what you wanna call our constant, hot make-out sessions?
When she doesn’t answer right away, I wonder if perhaps I pushed her too far. Then she replies, and a smile curves across my lips.
Lex: It’s not my fault you keep kissing me all the time. My lips must be really irresistible.
I sink my teeth into my bottom lip as images of kissing those irresistible lips of hers replay through my mind.
Me: Oh, they fucking are.
Lex: I was just kidding.
Me: And I was definitely not kidding. Your lips are the most irresistible thing I’ve ever tasted. Like ever.
Lex: You’re such a freak.
Me: And you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.
I wait for her to respond, but a message doesn’t pop up right away. I can see the dots on the screen, though, so I know she read the message. Eventually, she texts me again, and honestly, I don’t know what to make of it.
Lex: We need to talk after detention is over. Meet me out in the hallway?
Like I was just going to take off.
Still, the way her message seemed to shift to formal has me concerned.
What if she wants us to just be friends?
What if she tries to put an end to …?
I shake my head at myself. Put an end to what? None of this was ever supposed to be real to her. We were supposed to be fake dating, though I had hoped it’d lead to more. But that doesn’t mean she wants it to. Honestly, I’m not sure what she wants. For all I know, she could just pity me.
Great, this awesome plan of mine is turning into a real disaster.
Just like my life.
But I am going to do one thing right.
Taking out my phone, I send a text I’ve been meaning to send all day before Loraine and Eli distracted me.
Me: We need to talk.
Blaine: I’ve got nothing to say to you, asshole.
Me: You may not have anything to say right now, but you might after I tell you why we need to talk.
Blaine: Go fuck yourself. The moment you sucker-punched me, you lost your privilege to talk to me.
I roll my eyes. Privilege. Like it’s some sort of honor to talk to him.
Me: How about this then? We’re gonna talk about why Lex has been getting texts from an unknown number that’s registered in your name.
Wh
en he doesn’t answer right away, I know. Know that he’s somehow involved with this. Deep down, I think I’d been hoping Ellis was somehow wrong. Not because I want to stay friends with Blaine—our friendship ended the moment he broke Lex’s heart. No, I’m worried how Lex is going to handle this. Worry that her heart is going to get broken all over again.
Blaise: Meet me at my house at six.
That’s all he says, but it’s enough for me to be certain.
Certain that he’s part of this.
5
Alexis
I’m a nervous wreck during the rest of detention, for a few reasons, one being that I know Loki is going to be super upset with me when I get home. And two being that, after detention, I’m going to force myself to talk to West about what the blackmailer told me. Because, if I don’t, then I’m basically playing their game. And while I may have never said I wasn’t going to play their game, I know I can’t. At least, not for reals. If I talk to West, maybe we can come up with our own plan to play with the blackmailer.
I also need to talk to him about our fake relationship, because the line between what’s real and just pretend is starting to get blurry.
As detention comes to an end, I make my way out of the classroom then linger in the hallway, waiting for West to come out.
While I’m standing there, going over what I should say to him, my phone goes off. I immediately tense, wondering if it’s the blackmailer. Nope. It’s Loki
Loki: Don’t forget that you’re supposed to go straight to the store to paint it after you get out of detention. And then, when you get home, we’re going to sit down and have a little talk about what happened today.
Which means he’s going to chew my butt out for getting detention. Or maybe he’s just going to tell me it’s time to move out, that he is officially done with me. He kind of made it clear the day I got hauled to the police station that he was tired of my crap. Maybe this was the final straw. I am going to be turning eighteen soon, so he could tell me to move out.
I don’t know, though. Loki isn’t that hardcore, no matter how much he pretends to be.
Me: I figured as much. And I’m heading to the store in just a few. I didn’t forget.
Sighing quietly at that thought, I put my phone away and wait for West, who’s gotten trapped in a conversation with the teacher monitoring the classroom today, who also happens to be the PE teacher and coach. West used to play a lot of sports before he just up and quit, so he knows the coach pretty well.
The hallways are fairly vacant as I wait, something I’m relieved about since everyone has been gawking and whispering about me all day. Some were discussing the fight that went down between Masie and me, while others were gossiping about my and West’s heavy make-out session in the car. It’s annoying. Not that I care that anyone saw us making out. I mean, that was sort of the point of us fake dating in the first place. However, I’m not a fan of gossip. Masie used to do it all the time, and it was annoying.
“Hey,” West says as he exits the classroom with a few books in his hand. He offers me a small, somewhat nervous smile as he stops in front of me. “Sorry I got us detention. I know you were already in trouble. I hope this doesn’t make it worse.”
I give a dismissive wave of my hand. “It’s not your fault. I chose to be part of … what happened in the car.”
What did even happen in the car? Was that all pretend? Or did West really want to kiss me?
Do I really want to kiss West?
I sort of do, and that scares the crap out of me.
Hesitancy is written all over his face as he assesses me. “You’re okay with what happened?”
“You mean with getting detention?” I shrug. “I’ve gotten detention before.”
He slowly shakes his head, his gaze welded to mine. “No, with what happened in the car between us.”
“Oh.” My fingers unconsciously drift to where a hickey is branding my skin, memories of how it got there floating dizzily through my mind. Then I sink my teeth into my bottom lip. “I’m fine with that … I just …” I grimace. “I just don’t get exactly what happened between us.”
A crooked, amused smile touches his lips as he brushes the pad of his thumb along my bottom lip. “Well, first we kissed, and then I bit your neck.” His gaze briefly strays to the spot marking the moment. Then he leans in and lowers his voice. “And then you grinded against me over and over again.” He kisses me then, just a light brush of lips. And once again, all thoughts vacate my mind as I reach up and hold his shoulders as I kiss him back.
Yesterday, when I drew a sketch of him, I wanted to erase the pain that haunted his eyes. Apparently, my dumb ass thought that meant kissing him. A lot. So much so that I forget about everything else. Like the fact that I’m supposed to be at a store, painting over my art.
Thankfully, my phone goes off inside my pocket and yanks me away from lust land.
I move back, breaking the kiss, my breathing coming out in heavy pants as I dig my phone out.
I honestly thought it’d be Loki again, but nope. It’s from the blackmailer. And his words, they bitch smack me back into reality.
Unknown: Look at you, doing such a damn good job at playing this game. Although, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were enjoying yourself. But we both know that you’re in love with Blaine.
“What’s wrong?” A crease forms between West’s brows as his gaze bounces back and forth between my face and my phone.
“Um …” I swallow hard, highly aware that the blackmailer is more than likely watching me from somewhere, but I have no clue where since no one appears to be around. That doesn’t mean someone isn’t spying on us from one of the many classrooms nearby. After everything they’ve done to me, I’m not surprised. It still makes me anxious, though.
“It’s nothing. I just need to get going.” I stuff my phone into my pocket and move to leave, but he captures my arm and pulls me back to him.
“Baby, just talk to me,” he pleads.
Normally, I’d chew out his ass for calling me baby, but now really isn’t the time to worry about that.
I subtly shake my head then mutter under my breath, “Not now. Can you meet me at my house later?” Then, more loudly, I ask, “You know, so we can work on that project for Biology.”
Tension pours off him as he nods. “Yeah, I’ll stop by around seven?”
I nod, giving him a grateful look, glad he caught on. He doesn’t let me go, though. Instead, he threads his fingers through mine.
When I give him a puzzled look, he explains, “I’ll walk you to your car.”
“Oh. Okay.” I clutch his hand, my gaze sweeping the hallway as we walk down it and push out the doors, stepping into the warm, spring air.
Despite the warmth, I feel chilly inside. Unsettled. Nervous. It makes me realize how distracted I was with West today. Makes me want to go back to that moment in the car with him. Unfortunately, I still don’t know where we stand, especially when I climb into my car and he lowers his head to kiss me goodbye.
“I’ll see you at seven,” he whispers, his lips hovering close to mine. “Drive safe. And if you need anything at all, call me.”
I bob my head up and down, my heart a mess inside my chest. “Okay.”
He steps back, and I shut the door then drive out of the parking lot.
As I’m nearing the exit, I glance in the rearview mirror and find him watching me drive away, his eyes crammed with worry. I can’t decide if that’s any better than the sadness that I saw haunt them yesterday.
6
West
When I arrive at Blaine’s house, I’m completely on edge, feeling like I’m about to crawl out of my skin with restlessness, with irritation, with a lot of things.
As I’m climbing out of the car, I receive a text that amplifies that uneasiness.
Holden: We have a job to do tonight. Be at the house by ten.
My jaw ticks as I type a reply.
Me: I can’t go out that late. It�
��s a school night.
Holden: I don’t really give a shit what night it is. You’re gonna go or else.
That’s all he says. He doesn’t even bother with giving a list of what will happen if I don’t show. But he doesn’t have to. He already made it pretty damn clear what’ll happen if I back out of working for him.
“You don’t just get to quit this, man,” he had told me when I tried to quit. “I brought you into this; vouched for you. And you don’t get to quit until I say you do. And if you try, there will be consequences. Not just from me, but from my boss. When you agreed to my job offer, you agreed to stay in this until we let you go. Well, unless you don’t mind being thrown into the lake with bricks tied to your feet.”
While I’m not positive if he was just trying to scare me or was telling the truth, it was enough to terrify me into continuing this shitshow of dealing at night. That doesn’t mean I’m not plotting my way out of this mess. I just need to get ahold of this money, and then I can take off and start a new life, away from Honeyton, away from drug dealing, and away from the people I thought were my parents. Although, that means being away from Lex.
For a brief moment, my thoughts wander to the idea of what it’d be like if she came with me, but then I pull my head out of dreamland and focus on reality. And the reality is that, until I have the money, I’m stuck here.
So, I text Holden back.
Me: Okay.
Then I hop out of the car, tuck my phone into my back pocket, and start toward Blaine’s house. His father’s patrol car isn’t parked in the driveway, something I’m grateful for, since the last time I saw him was right after I punched Blaine and he drove me home instead of arresting me.
About halfway up the pathway, the front door swings open and out walks someone with a hoodie pulled over their head. I slow down, unsure what the hell is going on, when I hear the person mutter, “Get in your car.”
A Truthful Kiss: (Signed with a Kiss, Book 3) Page 4