Sweet Hope

by Tillie Cole

  Everyone looked as helpless as I felt, when Austin suddenly asked, “Which piece was his first? The one that got him recognized? Which one is it?”

  Taking calm breath, I led them toward the angel, which was the study of many admirers. But I heard the moment the Carillo’s had seen it. Sobs and anguished cries ripped from their throats.

  “It’s Mamma…” Levi said, his voice breaking.

  “It’s called Ave Maria,” I explained. “It’s how he saw your mamma in this life…” I pointed to the other side of the sculpture, “and how he dreamed she would look meeting the next.”

  Reaching out, Austin crushed Levi to his chest as they both broke down at the feet of the marble depiction of their mother.

  It was heartbreaking, gut wrenching and I couldn’t take looking at it. Turning away, I tried to breathe despite my tightly coiled chest, when I noticed many of the guests looking my way and smiling as they exited a darkened, cornered-off display. A door separated it from the rest of the gallery. I suddenly remembered Vin putting something together here. Hell. I’d been so preoccupied with Axel’s disappearance that I had forgotten all about it.

  Walking toward the door, I heard Molly and Rome following behind me, but I didn’t turn around, couldn’t turn. Suddenly, I heard the melodic sound of my favorite piece of music drifting to me from behind the wall.

  My heart hammered in my chest as I slowly opened the door, the sound of Yiruma’s “Kiss the Rain” seeping into my every cell.

  Flashbacks of me playing this, my favorite piece of music, for Axel in his studio raced through my mind. With every memory, I felt my heart break just that little bit more. A sizeable crowd had gathered around the sculpture, lavender lights creating a soft glow from above and the scent of Jasmine permeating the air.

  As I moved closer through the crowd, many smiled at me as “Kiss the Rain” played on repeat. As if the visitors sensed I needed to be alone, they quietly dispersed. My feet abruptly ground to a halt…

  Staring back at me was… me…

  “Oh, Ally,” I heard Molly sigh from behind me, but I couldn’t look away. I was transfixed by the sculpture in front of my eyes.

  A Carrara sculpture, of my smiling face, my chin balanced on my fist and my long hair flowing to one side was staring back at me.

  Shivers ran down my spine and butterflies rattled around my stomach as I realized this must have been the piece he was working on this week, outside… this was what he so desperately wanted to carve… this beautifully crafted face… was how he viewed me….

  “Hope,” Molly’s said, in awe. My glistening eyes followed the sound of her voice and she looked at me, her eyes watering beneath her glasses as she added, “This piece is called ‘Hope’.”

  Choking back a sob, I noticed that the room had cleared apart from my friends, a pained and sullen Austin, Levi and Lexi entering the room.

  I watched as they saw the sculpture, and Austin had to turn away.

  “What have I done?” I heard him whisper to his wife. “What the fuck have I done? Look at what he’s created. Look at all this, what he’s achieved and I made him leave because I jumped to the wrong fucking conclusions… I never gave him the chance to explain!”

  Making my way over to the title, I ran my finger along the word ‘hope’, then noticed the text board…

  “Hope is a fervent, silent wish that everything will turn out just as you dream…”

  Unable to hold anything back, I cried as I read the words Axel had used to explain the inspiration for this piece.

  Two strong arms wrapped around me, and I knew it was Rome. “Shit, Al, I… I don’t know what to fucking say,” he said apologetically and I cried harder into his chest. “I was fucking wrong. I was so wrong about him.”

  The room was silent apart from tears being shed for all the wrongs thrust upon the love of my life.

  As I pushed away from Rome, I looked to Austin and Levi and said, “Axel, or Elpidio, is seen as one of the most talented and inspiring Contemporary Modern Artists in the world. But Axel doesn’t see it. He doesn’t see how anyone can think he’s worth anything. Doesn’t see that he deserves a second chance because he can’t move past all the wrongs he’s committed in his past.”

  Sniffing, I glanced back at my marble face and said, “It’s time to put the past to bed. Stop judging him on yesterday, and accept the man he is today… the most amazing man I’ve ever known, ever will know.”

  Austin and Levi lowered their heads, seemingly in regret. Suddenly, Vin rushed through the door. Seeing me beside my sculpture, he rushed over to me, flustered and breathless. The look on his face...

  “Vin? What’s wrong?” I rushed out.

  Vin’s face was flushed and his hand lay on his chest. “I’ve… I’ve just received a call from the hospital. It’s Elpi…”

  My hands instantly started shaking. “What… What’s happened?” I asked, breathlessly.

  Vin stilled. “Elpi’s been shot.”

  Staggering back at his words, I ran into Rome’s chest. His strong arms stopped me from falling to the floor.

  “What?” I whispered. Austin and Levi ran forward. Austin gripped Vin’s arms and said, “Axe? Axe has been shot?”

  Vin, clearly seeing the family resemblance, nodded his head. “Yesterday afternoon. He was shot in the stomach. He’s in the hospital now. He had no ID on him at the scene. They took his fingerprints and because he was here in Seattle under my guidance, they called me. It took a while to track me down, I’ve been here all day getting this piece ready for the exhibition.”

  All I could visualize was blood and guns, when suddenly a name entered my head. “Remo…” I called out in panic, “Remo must have found him.”

  Austin and Levi’s head’s whipped to mine. “Remo? What do you mean Remo? What’s Remo Marino got to do with anything?”

  My lips and voice quivered, but I was able to say, “He told Axel he was going to kill him. He got word to Axel in prison that he would kill him in revenge for Gio’s death.”

  “SHIT!” Austin bellowed, his deep voice breaking, echoing off the gallery's walls. “Why didn’t he tell us? Why the fuck did he keep this from us?”

  “He… he never wanted you to worry about him… he was trying to protect you… all he wanted to do was to keep you safe.”

  Snapping his head back to Vin, Austin demanded, “Which hospital?”

  In a fluster, Vin told him. In seconds we were all running out of the door.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Ally

  “Mr. Carillo took a gunshot straight to the stomach. He lost a lot of blood. When he was brought in we had to operate straight away. We managed to repair the wound and successfully remove the bullet. He’s been transfused with blood and is now stable.”

  The doctor had yet to let us see Axel. My nerves were shot. I felt sick to my stomach as the doctor explained the extent of his injuries and how it could have killed him if the police hadn’t found him when they did.

  “Give us a few minutes to get him into his new room and he'll be ready to receive visitors¸ but only two at a time.”

  The doctor left the room. As I tried to breathe, a police officer walked in. “You’re Axel Carillo’s family?” he asked and looked at Austin.

  “Yes, sir,” Austin said and got to his feet. “You know what happened to him?”

  The police officer closed his notebook and nodded his head. “You know a Mr. Remo Marino?”

  I closed my eyes feeling my world was falling apart. I was numb, totally numb knowing that I could have lost the love of my life. The love of my life who deserved this new life he had—literally—carved out for himself.

  Remo… Remo Marino. That bastard almost took my heart from me.

  “Yeah, I know Remo,” Austin said, the tone of his voice dropping to arctic temperatures.

  The officer raised his eyebrow. “Old crew member?”

  Austin stared at the officer, but didn’t say anything. The officer swallowed and n
odded his head. “Okay, I get it.”

  “What happened to Remo?” Levi asked, seeming to take himself by surprise.

  The officer ran his hand down his face. “Mr. Marino was wanted on five counts of drug related felonies as well as two homicides. He’s been on the run for years. He crossed state lines in a stolen vehicle and it was only a matter of time before we caught him… unfortunately he managed to attack Mr. Carillo before we discovered his whereabouts. Another car passing by saw the incident and called it in.”

  “And?” Rome asked. “Where’s the prick now?”

  “Mr. Marino open fired on the attending officers. He had no intention of going to prison. He was shot dead on the scene.”

  The silence that followed the officer’s news hung heavily in the room. But I couldn’t help but be thankful that Remo had died… that meant… that meant Axel was finally free.

  He was finally free of his past.

  The officer opened the door and said, “I’m sorry your brother was injured. It seems he’s turned his life around. I hope he pulls through.”

  As the door shut, Austin slumped against the wall, sliding down to floor. He covered his face with his hands. “Christ…” he said in a gutting voice that made fresh tears spring from my eyes. “That fucking Heighter cunt. If he wasn’t dead already, I’d kill him myself.”

  Austin raised his head to me. “Ally?”

  I met his gaze.

  “Alessio?” he questioned. I knew what he was asking. He wanted to know if he was a danger to his brothers.

  “Serving life. Three counts of Homocide,” I replied, and saw a ton of tension leave his muscles. “He’s never ever getting out.”

  Just then, the doctor walked in the door. “Mr. Carillo can have visitors now.”

  I immediately jumped to my feet, as did Levi and Austin. The doctor looked at the three of us and his shoulders sagged. “No more than you three, okay?”

  We followed him out of the door and with every step I took, my heart beat faster and faster. I wanted to see Axel so desperately that I almost broke into a sprint. Clearly feeling my anxiousness, Levi reached down and took my hand. Startled, I met his gray eyes and saw the fear and sadness in their depths. He was just as afraid of walking in that room as me.

  The doctor led us to a room at the corner of the hallway. Chest tight and feeling numb, I followed him through a door, when I immediately froze in my tracks, as did we all, Levi’s hand grasping mine like a vise.

  Axel…

  Like a dam breaking, water poured down my face as I looked to my broken love in a hospital bed. Wires were poking in and out of his skin, blood being transfused into his arms.

  His beaten eyes were closed, his lips were swollen and bruised and his long hair was brushed back off his face.

  Even like this he was beautiful… my dark and tortured anti-hero… the man I was always destined to adore.

  As Austin’s back bunched at seeing his older brother, I held his hand too. Austin’s eyes closed briefly at my touch, but they opened and kept focus on Axel. None of us could look away… we’d come too close to losing him.

  “He’s been waking up more and more, so you should be able to talk to him soon.”

  In some part of my brain, I registered the doctor leaving, leaving us alone, but my eyes were glued to the other half of my soul lying on that bed.

  “How’s he ever gonna forgive us, Aust?” Levi said through a tight throat. “We treated him like shit, never gave him a damn chance to explain anything… and look what he’s been doing… look what he did for us both and we never knew. He nearly died in that prison trying to protect us, and he’s done it again… he’s protected us again…”

  Levi’s voice cracked. “He’s always been protecting us, hasn’t he, Aust? From when we were kids, he’s always tried to keep us close… and we turned our backs on him when he needed us most…”

  In the aftermath of Levi’s confession, the drips from the IV sounded like clashes of thunder as they dropped down into the liquid gathering in the dispenser.

  I opened my mouth to tell him it would all be okay, when we heard, “Ain’t got… nothing… to be… sorry… for…”

  Time seemed to stand still as the gruff timbre of Axel’s hoarse voice cut through the sadness of the room. As one, we all leapt forward. Axel and Levi ran to one side of his bed, and I the other.

  Stroking my hand across Axel’s forehead, I watched him struggle to swallow and open his eyes. A tear from my eye splashed on his cheek, right on his crucifix tattoo. I used my thumb to brush it away.

  As I ran the damp pad of my thumb along his jaw line, I felt that delicious sensation of a pair of Italian dark eyes watching me. Inhaling a fortifying breath, I blinked and glanced up to meet those beautiful eyes full on.

  Top lip twitching into a hooked smirk, Axel opened his split lips and rasped, “Carina…” with a relieved sigh.

  The endearment sounded like an answered prayer to my soul as it met my ears. Sniffing back my emotions, I gave him a watery smile, “Welcome back, querido…”

  “What… What?” he tried to ask. I shushed him and shook my head.

  “Everything’s okay, you’re okay.” I looked up at Austin and Levi standing anxiously on the other side of the bed. And reassured, “We’re all okay.”

  Axel slowly followed my gaze, bringing him to Austin and Levi. “Fratelli…” he said quietly, slowly lifting up his hand.

  Austin was the first to reach for Axel’s hand, his head lowering until his forehead touched their clasped fingers. “Axel… I’m so fucking sorry…”

  “Vai bene,” Axel replied. He next looked at Levi. “Lev…” he said with feeling. I could see Axel’s eyes shining with unshed tears. He loved that kid to death.

  Levi slumped to a chair like his legs could no longer take his weight, then his head hit the mattress, back shaking with the force of his tears. “I’m sorry, Axe… I’m so sorry…” he cried. Austin released Axel’s hand. Axel laid it on Levi’s head.

  Levi looked up as he did so and wrapped it in both of his hands. “We should have trusted you.”

  Axel closed his eyes then opened them a second later. “Ain’t ever… given… you much of a reason… to trust me in your lives… I… get it.”

  Austin shook his head. “You’ve only ever protected us, Axe… I get that now…” Austin wiped his eyes with the heels of his hands and asked, “those sculptures, Axe… why didn’t you tell us…?”

  “Shame…” he replied in embarrassment, “I didn’t deserve it…” His head rolled on the pillow to me, his eyes wordlessly telling me how much he loved me, “none of this. I’ve been… unfairly blessed.”

  Feeling my heart swell, I leaned down and kissed his lips. “You’re wrong.”

  “I’m a sinner,” Axel said. I could hear how much he believed that statement. I could see it in his honest expression.

  “No,” I soothed, “A sinner is a man who doesn’t recognize his wrongs. You have, querido, you’ve recognized them and done everything in your power to fix them… you’re not a sinner. You’re redeemed.”

  “She’s right, Axe,” Levi said and his breath caught, “Mamma… she would be so proud of you.”

  “Lev,” Axel whispered. Austin sat beside Levi, adding his hand on top of theirs. “I’m so proud of you… I have pride that you’re my blood.”

  Those words seemed to resonate with Axel, they meant something to the two of them and tears escaped Axel’s eyes. The sight of the three Carillo's together was my undoing.

  After minutes of the Carillo boys mending fences, Levi suddenly said, “Only good things for us from this point on, yeah?”

  Axel exhaled and I could see the pride for Levi’s show of strength glittering in his dark eyes.

  Levi looked up and met the eyes of both Austin and Axel. “Swear it.”

  Austin wrapped an arm around Levi’s shoulder, pressing a kiss to his head and said, “Lo giuro.”

  They both then looked to Axel. Axel smi
led through his swollen cut lips, a full genuine smile that I’d not seen him display before and he whispered. “Lo giuro.”

  *****

  Several hours passed as the three of us kept vigil by Axel’s bedside. He was tired, slipping in and out of sleep, but we stayed. The three brothers talked about Axel’s time in prison, Austin unable to believe that Axel hadn’t told him how he’d suffered. But they managed to move past it. Levi spoke of his fears of losing them both, but admitted he had bottled up his feelings for far too long, wrongly blaming Axel for all his pain.

  They laughed, they cried, and when the night wound down, a peace had been found.

  When the doctor entered to tell us visiting hours were over, Austin and Levi reluctantly rose to their feet, but before I could join them, Axel gripped my hand. “Don’t go,” he asked sleepily, and my heart melted.

  I looked to the doctor and threw him my sweetest smile. “Can I stay the night? He needs me.”

  The doctor sighed and I begged, “Please? I… I almost lost him…”

  Seeing sympathy in his expression, he said, “Just you.” Austin and Levi both kissed him on the forehead and promised to see him tomorrow.

  As they reached the door, I asked, “Will you please tell Molly and Rome I’ll see them tomorrow?”

  Austin nodded and smiled at me. I staggered back at the power of that smile and, casting a last glance to his brother on his bed, he said only so I could hear, “Look after him, Al. Never thought I’d see the day, but that brother of mine fucking loves you to death. He may not show his feelings much, but he can’t hide how much he adores you.”

  Reaching up to my tiptoes, I pressed a kiss on Austin’s cheek and whispered, “Siempre.”

  Austin laughed. I kissed Levi too before shutting the door. Everyone but the two of us had left the room.

  As I moved to the bed, Axel was staring at my shoes and met my eyes with a smirk. “I love those fucking shoes,” he said sleepily. I moved to the bed and, just as I was about to sit down on the nearby chair, Axel firmly shook his head and weakly patted the bed.

  He began shuffling to the side to make room for me and I jumped forward at seeing the pain etched on his face. “Axel!” I hissed, as he winced in agony and held his stomach wound. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead as he relaxed back into the mattress… a space for me now at his left hand side.