She stood hesitantly near the bed. "I need to change the bandage on your side if you're up to it."
Jacob let the blanket drop, revealing his bare chest and the bandaged wound. He didn't trust himself to say anything. Chloe perched at his right side on the edge of the bed, and with a delicate touch, peeled back the dressing over the gunshot wound. It was torture and heaven at the same time. Her fingers against his skin were soothing, but the pain from his wound almost negated the pleasurable feeling. She completed the cleaning process and gently ran her hands across his side. Jacob kept his eyes turned away from her, so she couldn't see what she did to him. When she reached for his face, he jerked away.
"Sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to startle you. I need to check that cut over your eye."
Jacob turned his head to the other side then closed his eyes. It certainly didn't feel like she was checking a cut, more like she was caressing him.
He sat as long as he could stand it. "Chloe, stop." He commanded in a choked voice. "That's enough."
"Almost done."
She smoothed an ointment across the cut and covered it with a bandage. The instant the bandage was in place, she kissed the side of his face.
Jacob opened his eyes, and his hands would have come up to stop her, but her lips found his mouth. He kissed her back, enjoying the sensation for a few seconds, until he remembered the look on her face when she'd talked about how the Colonel used her. He pulled away. Why was she inviting the physical contact she hated?
"Why did you do that?"
She didn't get angry or flee like she usually did. In fact, she remained hovering over him. "Isn't that what you want?"
It was pity. "Not like that. Please, don't do that again."
She pulled away. Was that pain and rejection he saw in her eyes? Father, what do I do?
"Chloe, I love you. I don't want your pity. When you love me, when it's what you want, then it will be all right."
Chloe considered that. Did she love him? No. Did she want him to touch her? No, but it hadn't made her feel used either. She didn't know how to explain what was going on inside her. Perhaps it would be best if she said nothing at all. Jacob had said he still loved her. That's what she'd been afraid of…that he wouldn't want her at all.
She tried smiling at him. "I understand. As long as you think it's worth the wait. I…can't make you any promises."
"You're worth it. I'm sure of it. And Chloe…" She moved back to the bed, and he reached for her hand. "Nothing will ever make me change my mind." He kissed her palm then let it go.
"Why did you choose to name me Dove?" she asked, referring to the codename he'd used in front of Lanky.
"The dove mates for life."
That evening was different from any they'd had. Chloe talked and talked. She talked about Jean-Pierre, about growing up in the shadow of the chateau. She told Jacob stories about Madame that had him laughing until his side hurt. It had been so long since she'd remembered her brother or the chateau with anything other than pain.
When Chloe saw Jacob holding his side, she reached for the pain pills. "It's time for this." She sat beside him and held out a glass of water.
"If I take that, I'll probably fall asleep."
"Sleep is still the best thing when a body is trying to heal itself."
He was about make a fool of himself. "I'm not sure I want this day to end."
Quite naturally, Chloe leaned forward and kissed his forehead. "Tomorrow will be more of the same. I promise."
"I love you, Chloe. Thank you." He let everything he felt for her show on his face, but she didn't turn away.
"For what?"
"Giving me a chance."
"Yes, well…tomorrow I'd like to hear something about your life."
Foreboding settled in his chest. Would she hate him when she knew about Geli and Adolph Hitler? Would she hate his child, a distant relative of the monster that had caused all her family's suffering? He felt Chloe's eyes watching him. Could she see the emotions that passed through his mind?
"You know," she began, "if you expect me to trust you, then you'll have to tell me who you are someday. Do you really think it would make a difference?"
Trust Chloe to come right to the point. "If I knew you loved me…no. I'm afraid I'll lose what I don't even have. But I'll pray about it. I know I can trust God, even when I can't trust myself."
"That sounds more like you." She smiled, reaching behind her. "Here's your Bible."
Jacob read out of Psalms because it always got his focus back on praise for the Father and away from the toils of the day. Chloe listened without comment. When he was done, she took the Bible from him and turned out the light.
Sound of her rustling to get comfortable in the chair filled him with longing. "Come back to bed, Chloe. I miss you."
"What if I have a nightmare and start fighting you? I could hurt you…even make you bleed."
"I'll pray for you. Get in the bed."
Chloe slept through the night without any nightmares, curled against Jacob's side. The next morning, pain woke him. Chloe was still sleeping, so he reached for the glass of water by the bed and downed the pill she'd left out. He waited a few minutes for the pain to subside then crawled off the side of the bed. His head swam from taking the pain pill on an empty stomach, but he wanted to make it to the bathroom. Steadily, he groped along the wall until he got there.
One look in the mirror convinced him that no woman would want to see him over the breakfast table. He hadn't shaved for three days, and he had a dark bruise above his left eye. He also needed a bath. He decided to shave first. With one hand gripping the counter, he was able to shave with the other. It took longer than usual, having to move that slowly. Gravity also did a number on his side. A growing, throbbing pain took hold that not even the pain pill affected. He felt relieved when he could drop on the side of the tub and turn on the water. He wasn't sure how he'd get in the tub, but he was determined to do it. It would be safe as long as he kept the bandage dry. That created another problem, washing his hair.
He swung his legs over the side and slid down the back wall of the tub using his arms for support. Since he couldn't move around a lot to wash off, he loaded the water with bubbles. He'd been sitting there a few minutes, waiting for the pain to subside, when Chloe burst through the door.
He raised a brow at her. "Don't you ever knock?"
"I thought I heard the water running."
She looked like a raging mother after a recalcitrant child. She peered over the side of the tub, and Jacob was thankful for the bubbles. They afforded him a modicum of modesty.
"Chloe, do you mind?"
"I was looking at your bandages. It's very dangerous to get them wet."
"As you can see, it's quite dry, and there's hardly any water in the tub."
Maybe she'd leave now. She didn't. She perched on the corner of the tub.
Jacob rolled his eyes. "What can I do for you, Chloe?"
"What are you doing here?"
"I feel that's obvious. If you'll allow me to proceed…" He pointed at the door.
"Let me wash your hair. It will be safer."
Jacob frowned, but it was obvious she wouldn't give up. "Fine."
"Lean your head back."
Chloe reached for a cup off the sink. She wet his hair then added soap, scrubbing his scalp with her fingers.
"Ouch! Don't take off the skin."
"Men are such babies."
Her fingers softened to a rhythmic massage, and Jacob closed his eyes. How nice it would be to pull Chloe into the tub with him. Someday, they would have that type of relationship. For now, she seemed happy taking care of him. He'd have to be thankful for what he had.
"Time to rinse. Tip your head way back."
She finished, but she didn't leave.
"You can go now, Chloe. I can manage the rest."
She leaned down and kissed him on the mouth. Jacob thought his heart would pound out of his chest. Her eyes remained on his as
she straightened, but she said nothing.
"What was that for?" he asked.
"You said I could whenever I wanted." Then she whirled out of the bathroom.
She wanted to kiss him? Jacob pulled the plug and turned on the cold water. He needed to rinse.
When he got out of the tub, he saw Chloe had left clean pajama bottoms. He dried with careful movements and returned to the bedroom.
Chloe was changing the sheets on the bed, but she looked up at him and smiled. "Are you all right? I'll just be a minute."
Jacob leaned against the wall while she finished the bed. Though he had enjoyed their new accord, it occurred to him that the house had been awfully quiet all morning.
"Has everyone else gone out to work?"
"I think so. Ferdinand said something about mucking out stalls." She made a face. "You're lucky you can't move. If you keep walking around, they'll think you're faking that injury." She straightened. "There. Climb in."
Jacob moved closer to the bed, and as he slid by Chloe, he reached out and pulled her against him. "I love you."
He brushed a kiss on each side of her mouth, giving her time to pull away if she objected to the contact. When she didn't, he kissed her on the mouth. Her lips were soft and pliant against his, and he wished the moment would go on forever, but he ended it quickly. She had been too agreeable lately to risk scaring her away. Jacob moved to the side and lowered himself to the bed. He avoided making eye contact, not sure he wanted to see how she felt. When he lay back on the pillows, weariness overwhelmed him and he couldn't help the sigh that escaped his lips.
"Are you all right?" she asked.
"Just tired. I probably overdid it."
"Can I get you some breakfast before you fall asleep?"
"I don't want to be any trouble."
"From what I've heard, all men are trouble." She disappeared down the hall.
In the kitchen, Chloe ran into Antoinette. "If you don't mind, I'm going to get Jacques something to eat before he passes out again. He's already taken a pain pill."
"Go ahead. How is he feeling this morning?"
"A lot better. He even took a bubble bath, and I washed his hair."
Antoinette grinned. "You're looking awfully happy. Did something happen you'd like to talk about?"
Chloe blushed. "I…I kissed him."
"How did he react?"
"He kissed me again when he got out of the bath."
Antoinette giggled. "With or without clothes?"
Chloe felt her face flame, but she grinned. "Very funny. He was wearing pajamas."
"You know, Chloe, Jacques is a very handsome man, and he's faithful. That says a lot these days."
"Mmm," Chloe mumbled, thinking about how she'd felt when Jacob kissed her. There had been a distinct butterfly effect in her stomach. Could that be attraction?
She carried the tray up the stairs and found Jacob reading his Bible again. He marked his place and set it aside to take the tray from her.
"Thank you. That looks good. And you look very pretty today."
Something about Jacob's dark eyes drew Chloe. She remembered the first time she'd seen him, standing with the villagers outside the castle. When she'd looked into his eyes, she'd noticed how alive and dark they were.
"Have I ever told you that you have the most lively, beautiful brown eyes?"
She almost laughed when Jacob dropped his fork.
"No," he said, after he'd recovered it. "If you keep flirting with me, I'll have an appetite for something besides breakfast."
Chloe could feel another blush heating her cheeks and neck. Was Jacob helping her forget the past so quickly?
"I…Then I better go down and help Antoinette with the chores. Just leave the tray. I'll be back for it later." And she was gone.
Jacob smiled. His wife thought he was attractive. God was good!
Chapter 16
That night Jacob read to Chloe from John chapter four, another story about a woman that had been with many men. Out of her entire town, Jesus chose to speak about salvation to her first. He purposely sought her out, and the rest of the town received salvation because of her. If only Chloe could recognize God's love for those in sin, His divine ability to forgive.
Throughout Jacob's recitation, her brow remained furrowed with concentration. When he finished, she only made one comment. "I don't think the priest from my town was reading the same Bible. His God didn't want me."
"There's only one God, Chloe, and He loves you more than you can understand. Your priest was wrong."
She turned out the lamp and crawled into the bed beside him. She curled into his side and laid her head in the crook of his shoulder. When Jacob kissed the top of her head, he could have sworn he heard a little sigh of contentment.
Sleep didn't come so easily for him. How could a man of God reject one of God's children when they came to him for help? How could a man whose life had been saved by Chloe's sacrifice turn his back on her? Time with Chloe was showing Jacob how deep her scars went. If God hadn't already shown him encouragement, would they have a chance together?
Jacob continued to improve, spending more time sitting up in the chair. The others wouldn't let him do any hard labor, yet, but he was tired of the bed.
Many times during the day, Chloe would find him reading his Bible before the window, or head bent, praying. In the evenings, they listened hopefully to the radio for the BBC announcement giving them the go ahead for their parachute drop.
One day, Ferdinand returned from town more excited than usual. Opossum's radio operator, Sibelius, had radioed London and gotten a date for the parachute drop.
It went off without a hitch. Though Jacob wasn't able to go, Chloe accompanied Ferdinand and Joshua to the drop site and helped them bury the parachutes and crates after they removed the supplies.
Amongst the supplies, they found questionnaires that indicated what type of information the Allies most needed. Marie-Madeleine also sent new codes and instructions for each group. She particularly wanted France d'Abord to search for the traitor, Lanky. Only one day remained before the Nazis would invade the Unoccupied Zone.
When the Nazis took over, there wasn't a huge change. At least, not at first. They demanded all the arms from the small military force in the Vichy regime, and they disbanded the meager French army.
London was desperate for intel during this time, so spying escalated, as did the number of Resistance fighters arrested and killed. Nazi justice against them was simple. Most often they received a bullet to the back of the head without so much as a trial or burial. Jacob became anxious to get back in the thick of things. He no longer felt it was safe to stay in one place for too long.
No matter what information they sent to London now, they were asked to check and double-check. The intelligence war was ruthless. Stronghold gained knowledge of long-range bomber planes in the Lyon region and requested information on aerodromes in Lyon, Bron, Dijon, Clermont-Ferrand, Avord, and Bourges. Could anyone find specific numbers, identification types of new squadrons, and the preparations in the cities listed? As usual, all requests for intel were urgent.
Jacob, Joshua, and Ferdinand spent days away from the farm, searching out the truth. They made radio transmissions from a different location every time to prevent the Gestapo scouts from locating their radio. On nights they stayed at home, they were so exhausted that romance was the last thing on Jacob's mind.
On a beautiful spring day, Jacob stood in front of the window in his bedroom. In the months that had gone by, he'd never pushed his relationship with Chloe. She seemed content to let things be. When a man was gone off and on for weeks, it was difficult to court a woman.
Perhaps he should take Chloe out in the field with him. They'd stayed with the Darnells long enough. Though he would miss the support of Joshua and Ferdinand, there were places he needed to go, and he didn't want to leave Chloe behind. If the Gestapo ever apprehended her, he wanted to be nearby. Otherwise, he wouldn't know where she was taken. Th
ey had to stay together.
He stared out the window. What if she didn't want to go with him? She acted happy when they were together, but that wasn't love. Did she trust him enough to leave the Darnells? They had become like second parents to her. But the constant flow of Resistance personnel through their home didn't make it a safe place for Chloe to live, especially with Jacob gone so much. As they had experienced before, it only took one traitor to ruin all their lives.
When Jacob turned away from the window, he saw Chloe standing at the doorway, watching him. "How long have you been there?"
"Long enough to know something is troubling you."
He wrinkled his face in a wry smile. "How can you tell?"
"A wife just knows these things. Want to talk about it?" She flitted through the door then shut it to settle on the end of the bed.
"I think it's time to go."
"When are you leaving?"
Jacob searched her face for some sign that she cared.
"I meant the both of us. I need to go farther away, too far to use this place as a base. Will you go with me?"
Chloe felt elation. He wanted her with him, and he trusted her to go out in the field. "Will we be coming back?"
"I have no idea. It's not in the plan right now. Marie- Madeleine could come back any time and…I just don't know."
Chloe had become very jealous of that name. She'd learned from Antoinette that Marie-Madeleine was beautiful and everyone loved her. When Jacob referred to her, it was with a great deal of respect, perhaps something more.
"Chloe? Will you come?"
"If that's what you want, of course." If only he would tell her that's what he wanted.
Jacob decided he would have to be satisfied with that. They were on good terms. Perhaps when she had no one but him to rely on, they would become closer. He gathered his supplies and got his weapons in order.
When he told Joshua and Ferdinand he was leaving, they weren't surprised. This was the longest the Lion had ever stayed in one place. Jacob was known for his reconnaissance abilities, and he was needed further afield.
All Things New Page 19