by Heldt,Dora
Of course, it wouldn’t be enough to go back to sharing a house in some isolated location again. She realized she had started romanticizing her memories of the past. Back then, Christine and she had supported, not saved, each other. No more so than Lars or Hanne or Ralf had been able to save her.
The train rolled into the Hamburg main station. Dani stood up and pulled her jacket on. As she retrieved her bag from the luggage compartment, the train came to a halt and Dani heard the station announcer’s voice: “Hamburg Central Station. Change here for connections to…”
Maybe I should pay more attention to working out my own connection and not always look for someone who can drive me home by car, thought Dani as she walked down the aisle to the doors. She climbed out and walked along the platform toward the metro.
It felt as though the knot in her stomach had eased.
Lübeck-Hamburg
Frauke looked at herself in the wardrobe mirror as she draped her new scarf around her just like Gudrun had shown her to. Her gaze fell on Gunnar, who was sitting on the steps and watching her. She smiled at him.
“And? How do I look?”
Instead of answering he asked: “Why are you guys leaving so early anyway? You’re not meeting the others until five. What are you going to do the whole day?”
He was in a bad mood, just like he had been for days now. Frauke had no intention of being drawn into an argument.
“We want to have a look around the harbor and have a coffee somewhere. If I’m going to be in Hamburg, I want to make the most of it.”
Gunnar’s expression didn’t change. “You’re acting as if I’ve locked you up in the house for the last fifteen years. As if we never go anywhere.”
Frauke turned around. “Oh, Gunnar, I didn’t say that. What’s all this about? Heavens, I’m just going away for the day for once, and I’ll be back by tomorrow at lunch, or the afternoon at the latest. So what’s wrong?”
She was getting drawn in after all. Frauke shook her head indignantly, turned back to the mirror, and painted her lips with her new lipstick, pressing them together firmly. She thought the color looked beautiful. Gunnar cleared his throat, and she tried again.
“And, how do I look now?”
“Strange.” Gunnar stood up and went into the kitchen. Frauke watched him go. As she contemplated whether or not to go after him, the doorbell rang. Frauke opened the front door and let Gudrun in.
“Good morning, beautiful. I think I’m a little early, aren’t I?”
Frauke looked at the clock. “A little, but I’m almost ready, so we can make a move in a minute.”
“OK,” answered Gudrun, “I’ll just say good morning to Gunnar and go to the bathroom. Where is your darling other half?”
“In the kitchen.” Before Frauke had the chance to mention his bad mood, Gudrun was already in the kitchen. Frauke followed her.
Gunnar was sitting at the table, the newspaper open in front of him, the coffee pot next to it. He nodded at Gudrun but didn’t get up, just kept on reading.
Gudrun looked at him, baffled. “What’s up with you? Did you get out of bed on the wrong side or something?”
Gunnar gave an embarrassed smile and stood up awkwardly. “Sorry, I’m not feeling great. Maybe I’m getting the flu.”
Frauke looked at him, amazed. Gudrun laughed. “The flu? You don’t get the flu just because you have to spend the weekend without your better half; that’s not how viruses are spread. Well, I hope you have a good morning; tell us to have a good time, too. And now I have to go to the bathroom.” She gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder and disappeared.
Frauke sank down on the chair and stared at Gunnar. First he tried to avoid her gaze; then he sighed resignedly. “I’m sorry, but you’re so different and you’re always thinking about the old days and you’re going shopping with Gudrun and cutting your hair off and…”
He looked at her uncertainly. Frauke stood up, stood in front of him, and pulled his head to her chest. “You dope,” she said, kissing him on the head. “It’s nothing against you. I have my cell with me, so call if you need me.”
“You’ll be in touch anyway though, won’t you?”
Gudrun was back in time to hear the last sentence. “Gunnar, it’s not like we’re not going to Bali for three weeks. I’ll deliver Frauke back here in one piece tomorrow afternoon. So, shall we make a move?”
Frauke nodded. “Yes. OK then, darling, see you tomorrow.”
Gunnar walked them out. “Make sure you behave.”
He watched them go with a pained expression.
Frauke and Gudrun stayed silent until they were on the motorway. Then Gudrun glanced at Frauke, who was grinning at the glove compartment.
“What are you thinking?”
Frauke looked first at Gudrun, then at the road. “I’m happy. About this afternoon, tonight, about my new haircut, about my dress, that I’ve realized some things about myself, and—you’re going to laugh, but about coming back tomorrow, too. Somehow everything feels brand new.”
Gudrun smiled at her. “This invitation really was a kiss of life to you, wasn’t it?”
“Yes.” Frauke nodded contentedly. “And it was about time.”
Kiel-Hamburg
Lena fastened her seat belt and waved to her daughter, who was standing next to her mother-in-law by the front door. Kathleen put her hands either side of her mouth and shouted:
“Have fun and bring me something!”
Jürgen beeped twice and drove slowly out of the driveway. As Lena turned around, they had already disappeared into the house. She looked at her husband. “No one could say Kathleen has separation anxiety.”
Jürgen laughed. “She can watch TV until she passes out, eat chips to her heart’s content, Grandma will read her fortune and tell her about her golden future, and then she’ll spend hours on the phone with her girlfriends without you there to interrupt her. What’s there for her to be upset about?”
He tried to find a channel on the radio. “Who’s been playing around with the tuning? I always have it on NDR 2; can’t people just leave the radio where it is?”
“I went shopping with your mother. She wanted to listen to something lively, not that foreign rubbish, as she called it. We listened to Hansi Hinterseer, Udo Jürgens, and Nana Mouskouri, all the golden oldies; it was wonderful.”
“Aha.” Jürgen laughed. “She doesn’t dare do it when she’s with me. I told her music like that makes me dizzy, and that it’s dangerous when I’m driving.”
He turned up the volume. Herbert Grönemeyer was singing “Airplanes in My Stomach.” Jürgen whistled along softly.
“This takes you back, doesn’t it?”
Lena nodded. “Dani used to sing along to it while she was scraping the wallpaper off. It’s a really sad song though. But she didn’t mind. Completely the opposite, in fact; it always got her going.”
“And you? Are you still feeling sad about Christine? Do you really think it’s the right decision for me to be coming with you?”
Lena laid her hand on Jürgen’s knee. “That was two questions. Firstly: no, I’m not feeling sad anymore. After all, I’ve spoken to Marleen and Ines already, so now I’m just curious as to how things will be with Christine. I’m looking forward to seeing Dani and Ines again, but above all to seeing Christine. I’m relaxed though. And secondly, I do think it’s the right thing that you’re coming. You always liked her. If you’d had your way, perhaps we would still be friends now. I’ve been thinking, and perhaps I really was too stubborn and bitter after the night at her housewarming party. After all, it takes two to end a friendship.”
Jürgen pressed her hand. “Well, you were pretty angry at the time. Perhaps you were both just more sensitive then. Women always take criticism from their friends much more personally than men do. It always seems like the end of the world to them.”
“Is that what the woman in you thinks?” asked Lena mockingly.
“Hey, I’ve got a mother, four aunts
, three sisters, a wife, and a daughter. Don’t try telling me I don’t understand women. You’ve all made me this way.”
Lena laughed. “That’s true. But you do it very well, sweetheart. Well, I’m curious about what it will be like. In any case, I’m sure it’ll be an exciting evening; we’ve got a lovely hotel and we’re going away by ourselves for a change. So it’s all worth it, right?”
Jürgen nodded. “Of course it is. And I’ll be paying close attention to whether two women who were once the best of friends will only take a matter of seconds to get over the nonsense they caused years ago in their youthful ignorance. You really were silly.”
Hopefully, thought Lena, hopefully it will be that easy.
Hamburg
Carefully, Marie hung her new dress on a hanger in the hotel wardrobe. She didn’t want to show up at that chic restaurant looking all wrinkled. She’d already been there at lunchtime to check it out. It truly was very stylish—trendy, as her niece would say. The waiter had come up to her immediately.
Marie had told him she was part of the group for the surprise party that evening. He was very friendly and showed her the room, which was already prepared. She drew his attention to the missing candles and gave him a few more suggestions for the table decoration. He seemed grateful for her input.
Marie was sometimes amazed at how little people seemed to think for themselves. She had been a teacher for almost twenty years. In her job you had to take on a great deal of responsibility, and she had gained a lot of experience in organization and, above all, how to motivate people. It made her nervous when things were done sloppily. Marie was surprised that neither Ines nor Ruth was at the restaurant already. The waiter had said some nonsense about six o’clock, but Marie knew the plan was to meet at five in the hotel bar. She wondered whether the two of them were at least in the restaurant by now. Personally, she would have stayed until everything was to her satisfaction. But she had offered Ruth her help, and she had turned it down.
Taking her cosmetic bag from her suitcase, she went into the bathroom to put the various tubes and bottles in the cabinet, everything in a particular order, of course. She moved everything around until she was content. Just as she always did. The way it had to be. Then she washed and moisturized her hands. As she put her ring back on her finger, she realized that Mischa hadn’t called yet. She looked at the clock; it was already two thirty. He’d said he was going to the weekend market that morning, and then to the mechanics. Why was it taking so long? Marie walked briskly across the room and picked up her phone from the windowsill. She selected Mischa’s number on the speed dial, then heard her husband’s voice as he picked up.
“Oh, Annemarie, I was just about to call you; I’ve literally just come through the door.”
“What have you been doing this whole time? I phoned the landline twice and your cell was off.”
The lie just tripped off her tongue. Mischa always had his cell turned off because he was paranoid about radiation, and at home he hardly ever heard the phone; it was in Marie’s office. His voice sounded immediately remorseful. “I’m sorry. I went for a coffee with Mrs. Hoffmann; we bumped into each other at the market.”
Marie had met Mrs. Hoffmann once; she was a redhead—from the bottle—and a colleague of Mischa’s. If you could call a teacher at a vocational school a colleague, that is. Marie felt herself getting angry.
“Why are you going for coffee? I thought you were going to take the car to the garage! Fine then, I’m not going in the car with you anymore.”
Mischa tried to calm her down. “I took the car in earlier. It’ll be ready on Monday afternoon. So, did you get there OK? Have you already met the others?”
Marie rolled her eyes. “Of course I got here OK; it’s not like it’s the first time I’ve been to Hamburg. And if you’d been listening to me you’d know we’re not meeting until five. I honestly don’t know why I bother telling you anything.”
“Marie, please, let’s not argue. Have a good time this evening.”
“I’m not arguing. What are you doing now?”
“I have to correct some class tests, and then I might go for a beer with Stefan later.”
“Well, don’t drink too much if you do. Remember we’re going to the theater tomorrow evening, so you don’t want to be tired for that. See you then.”
She hung up without waiting for his answer. Marie looked out of the window, which had a view of the harbor. She had no idea how her husband would ever survive without her. Sometimes she felt like she had had enough of her marriage; that’s what happens when you’re still married to the guy you met in dance class thirty years ago. Mischa had been so talented back then. Admittedly he would never have started studying to become a vocational school teacher after his training if it hadn’t been for her. As if Annemarie Erdmann could live with a car mechanic. But he’d been smart enough to realize that, too. Although, as a vocational teacher, Mischa wasn’t technically a proper academic. But she had been willing to compromise.
Marie thought back to their dance lessons. Back then Christine was head over heels for Mischa; everyone had noticed. Just imagine the expression on her face when she heard that Marie and Mischa celebrated their silver wedding anniversary two years ago. And in Schröder’s Hotel no less, the same venue as the graduation ball. It had been a great party, with around a hundred guests. Mischa had whined about the cost, of course, but she didn’t care. If Marie Erdmann did something, she did it right. And she had proved that to everyone yet again.
Marie checked to see if she had all the photos with her. Christine would want to see them for sure. She flicked through them slowly. Her parents’ renovated house, the holiday home in Föhr, Marie playing tennis, her school, some photos from the last school trip with her in the middle, beaming away, and the good-looking math teacher next to her. Marie smiled. It was worth teaching sports, too; her figure was still like it had been back then. She’d only put in an old photo of Mischa. Christine didn’t have to know that his optician’s prescription now stated five diopters, that he couldn’t see anything without glasses and hardly had any hair left. But back then he had been a really handsome guy.
Marie put the photos back in her purse and decided to go for a coffee. Once again, it seemed she had everything under control.
The Countdown
Hamburg
Marleen knocked on the hotel room door.
“Coming.”
Dani opened the door and hugged Marleen. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re staying here, too.”
Marleen was wearing a red dress, and her dark locks were piled high. She was carrying a black jacket and had a small purse with her. Dani looked her up and down.
“Wow, you look great. Although, I have to say the kitchen uniform suited you, too.”
Marleen took a bow. “Thank you. You’ve got to make an effort. You know, when the cook comes to the big city.” She looked around the room. “This is a really nice hotel; I can even see the harbor from my bed. I normally stay at Christine’s, but I told her that I have a birthday party to cater at the pub today. For forty-four people; unfortunately she didn’t get the pun.”
Dani laughed. “I never thought we’d all be able to keep it a secret for so long.” She looked for her lipstick in her purse and stood in front of the mirror to finish her makeup. Her blond hair was falling loosely down over her back, and she had a brown pantsuit on that matched the color of her eyes. She turned around to Marleen.
“OK, I’m ready. Let’s get the party started.”
“Good, you look great by the way. Come on, let’s go.”
Luise walked into the hotel bar and looked around for the others. In a corner two small tables had been pushed together: two women were sitting next to each other, one of whom was looking at Luise questioningly. With long strides, she walked over to them.
“Code word ‘Christine’?” she asked.
Both laughed and stood up. The taller one had short dark hair, was slim, and wore black pants and a green velvet
jacket. Her handshake was firm and her voice, deep.
“Hi, I’m Gudrun.”
Luise nodded her hand. “Gudrun with the horse. Lovely to meet you, I’m Luise. So that means this must be Frauke?”
Frauke was impressed by Luise’s model figure, her black locks and close-fitting black and white dress. Discreetly, she pulled her neckline up a little, feeling plump. She gave Luise her hand. Her voice sounded a little faint.
“Yes, that’s right, I’m Frauke. Hello.”
Luise looked her over. “That’s a wonderful dress you’ve got on. I’m always a little jealous when I see women with such beautiful cleavage.”
Frauke went red. She smiled at Gudrun.
At that moment they heard loud laughter coming from the entrance. Ines, Ruth, and Gabi came in together and veered over toward the table. Ines, casual as always in black jeans and a black jacket, introduced herself first; then Ruth, dressed in a pink outfit with a mass of colorful jewelry; and then Gabi in a blue suit with a white T-shirt. Ruth beckoned the waiter right away and ordered two bottles of champagne with eight glasses. They sat down and started to talk excitedly.
Once Dani and Marleen arrived, Ruth interrupted the chatter and raised her glass. “So, I’d like to say something; are we all here?”
“Not yet.” The voice that came from the door belonged to a tall woman with a dark pageboy haircut and a loud voice. She was wearing a cream-colored dress, a black silk scarf, and lots of gold jewelry.
“Good evening, everyone. It’s not even five yet though.”
Ines stood up. “Marie?”
“Who else?” Marie shook Ines’s hand and gave the others a brief nod. Luise was sitting next to Frauke, so noticed when she briefly groaned. Luise looked at her questioningly. Frauke leaned over to her.
“That’s Annemarie Erdmann, right?” she whispered.
Luise nodded. Gudrun had overheard and was coughing into her hands so as not to laugh out loud. Luise looked at them both. Frauke bit her lip and tried to keep a straight face.