Can two carriers be together?
Julian didn’t expect to have a second chance at life. Then his son dragged him out of the forest, and he met Kaspar.
Kaspar thought he’d eventually go home now that the carriers in the forest are free, but Julian walked into his life and made him rethink everything.
Julian and Kaspar want to be together, but even with the new laws and the majority of the council on their side, it doesn’t mean that people will look kindly at two carriers who want to be together, even if one of them thinks he can’t have any more children.
That’s only one of their problems. Kaspar is much younger than Julian, who already has an adult son. Julian doesn’t know how to live with people after spending the past twenty-five years in the forest.
And the humans are coming, something that could cause more problems than anything they are prepared for.
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In Spite of Everything
Copyright © 2020 Catherine Lievens
ISBN: 978-1-4874-2869-3
Cover art by Angela Waters
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher.
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In Spite of Everything
Allegheny Shifters Book 6
By
Catherine Lievens
Chapter One
“I can’t believe you said that!” Chris yelled.
Julian sighed and closed his eyes. He hated that Jacob and Chris were fighting—again.
“What do you want me to say? We already talked about this.” Jacob sounded angry, but also weary, as if he couldn’t do this anymore. If Julian were in his place, he’d probably feel the same way.
Julian knew why Chris and Jacob were fighting. Everyone did. Even though he’d been the last to arrive at the Bishop House, he’d been informed that Chris would one day become the next bobcat alpha. Jacob, on the other hand, was a badger, and a guard. To make things even more complicated, Chris was a carrier. It meant he could get pregnant by Jacob, something his father was bound to be unhappy with. Chris didn’t care about that, though. He was strong-willed, and he knew exactly what he wanted in life.
And he wanted Jacob.
The two of them had been fighting over that ever since things had started to get better for the carriers in the forest. Chris’s father would eventually come back to get Chris and his twin brother, Nico. He would take them home, and Chris would be without Jacob. Chris had been trying to convince Jacob to move with him to bobcat territory, but Jacob had said no every time.
Julian didn’t blame him.
One would think that since Julian had spent most of his life hiding in the forest, he wouldn’t understand human beings. Some days he still had a hard time. But the Bishop House was perfect for him. He was surrounded by people who were like him—shifters, carriers, men who were more vulnerable than most people in the forest. They shared the house with the guards, too, but all of them were good people, like Jacob.
Chris and Jacob should be free to be together. Julian didn’t know if they were in love, but he suspected they were It was obvious from the way they looked at each other. But Chris had big things waiting for him in the future. He would become the bobcat alpha, and he would rule over a wide territory and numerous people. Jacob, on the other hand, was only a guard. There was nothing wrong with that, but traditionally, alpha marriages were arranged. The different shifter groups did that to create alliances and gain allies. That wouldn’t happen in this case, because Jacob was only a guard, not part of the badger alpha’s family.
Julian didn’t think it mattered. As far as Thomas, the badger alpha, was concerned, he already had an alliance with the bobcats. He’d taken in the twin sons of the bobcat alpha when carriers had been hunted, and he hadn’t asked for anything in return. He was a good man, and it showed in the way he treated his sons. Two of them were carriers, yet he hadn’t sold them out. He’d allowed them to choose who they wanted to marry, and they had. They were both happy now, and Thomas wanted the same for all the cete members. He wouldn’t have anything to say if Jacob decided to leave. Hell, he’d probably help him, and he would make sure Jacob had everything he needed to start a new chapter of his life.
But Jacob was resistant. Leaving the cete would mean leaving everything he knew behind to become a future alpha mate. He didn’t want that, and Julian didn’t blame him. The thought of being in a position of responsibility was terrifying, and Julian was more than happy to hide out in the Bishop House. This was where he belonged anyway. He no longer had a place in his gang. He’d left a long time ago, and even though the alpha had since died, he already knew he couldn’t go back, not after everything that had happened.
The cete had become his new family, his and the carriers’. He was happy that he and his son had found a family they hadn’t known they could have, but he wished that family would stop yelling.
“Why won’t you even try?” Chris cried out, pain tingeing his words.
He and Jacob were fighting in the kitchen, which meant none of the other carriers or the guards could go there. It was almost time for dinner, though, and that made things awkward.
Every fight Chris and Jacob had made things awkward. Julian wished he could do more for them, but he’d tried talking to both, and nothing had changed. He knew he wasn’t the only one who’d tried. Everyone in the house wanted to see Chris and Jacob happy, but Julian was starting to wonder if they wouldn’t be happier separated rather than together. They might be in love, but sometimes, love wasn’t enough. No matter how much people tried or how much they felt, it didn’t mean they would succeed.
“I can’t come with you,” Jacob said. His tone was quieter now, but just as torn.
“Because you don’t care about me,” Chris snapped.
“Of course I care about you.”
“Not enough.”
Julian had heard enough. He rose from the couch and strode toward the kitchen, ignoring the alarmed glances he got from a few of the carriers who were waiting for the kitchen to be empty. He stepped into the kitchen, and both Chris and Jacob turned to look at him.
Chris was smaller than Jacob, but he seemed to tower over him. Jacob was sitting at the counter with his face in his hands. Chris’s cheeks were flushed, and his hair looked like he’d raked his hands through it more than once. He was breathing heavily, but he shut his mouth as soon as Julian walked in.
“It’s almost time for dinner,” Julian said.
Chris shook his head. “And you can’t wait?” He turned his attention back to Jacob without waiting for an answer. “This isn’t over. We’re not done talking.”
He stomped out, and Jacob apparently couldn�
��t resist having the last word. “We’re not talking about this again, Chris,” he yelled after Chris. “It won’t change anything.”
Julian arched a brow at him, and Jacob shook his head and buried his face in his hands again.
Julian decided to leave him to it and headed for the fridge, wondering what he could put together for everyone. It would have to be something quick, since they didn’t have time to cook.
“I’m sorry,” Jacob said.
Julian should stay out of it. It would be best for everyone, but especially for himself. He’d already tried, and he hadn’t made a difference. He wasn’t sure he could ignore the pain in Jacob’s voice, though.
“When will he leave?” he asked.
“I don’t know. We don’t know. His father wanted to take him and Nico home when the cete was attacked, but thanks to Kari, he allowed them to stay for a little while longer. It won’t last forever, though.”
“And he’s still trying to convince you to go with him.”
“I’m pretty sure everyone here knows that’s what’s happening. He hasn’t been discreet about it.”
Julian chuckled and reached for a bag of lettuce. If he added stuff to it like cheese and tomatoes, it would make a nice salad. “He’s not even trying to be discreet. I’m pretty sure even Thomas heard him, and the Bishop House is a long way from the rest of the cete.”
“I don’t know what to do anymore,” Jacob said with a groan.
“What can you do? As far as I can see, there are only two options, and it looks to me like you’ve already decided.”
“What options?”
Julian dumped the lettuce into the sink so he could wash it and turned to look at Jacob. “Either you go with him, or you break up with him and stay here.”
Jacob scowled. “Why can’t I stay here and still be with him?”
Julian smiled sadly. “Because it’s not that easy. Because he’s not just a guy. He’s a carrier, and a future alpha to boot. He will have a lot of responsibilities, and as the alpha, he cannot have a boyfriend who lives in another shifter group. Besides, if things evolve between the two of you, one of you is going to have to move eventually. Will you ask him to give up his future position to live with you here?”
Jacob pulled on a strand of his short hair. “Why not? Why should I have to be the one to move?”
“I’ve never said it was fair. But life isn’t fair most of the time, Jacob. No one said you should move, but you’re going to have to make a decision... and fast. This can’t go on. You’re disrupting the peace, and God knows most of the people who live here need it.”
Jacob rubbed his face. “I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”
Julian smiled at him. They both knew that was a lie, but he didn’t point that out.
* * * *
Kaspar almost collided with Chris outside the kitchen. He managed to step to the side before Chris could mow him over, and he watched Chris as he stomped his way upstairs.
He’d heard the fight. He was pretty sure everyone in the house and even a few people outside had heard it. Fights between Jacob and Chris were almost routine by now, and Kaspar wasn’t sure anyone could do anything about them. Things would change once Chris moved back home, but no one knew when that would be, and Kaspar couldn’t help but wonder what would happen then.
He looked toward the kitchen, then at the stairs again. Kaspar didn’t know where Nico, Chris’s brother, was, but it wasn’t upstairs. Maybe Chris shouldn’t be alone. He might not want to see anyone right now, but Kaspar wanted him to know that he wasn’t alone. He had friends who would listen to him if he needed them to. Kaspar wasn’t about to take a side because he didn’t think anyone was wrong in this situation, but he could support Chris.
He followed Chris upstairs.
Chris’s bedroom door was closed, of course, but Kaspar quietly knocked. He was surprised when Chris called for him to enter, then realized Chris had probably thought he was Jacob when Chris’s eyes widened and his expression crumbled. He flopped back onto his bed and looked away.
Kaspar stepped in and closed the door behind himself. “I’m sorry if I’m bothering you,” he said.
“You’re not bothering me. Did you need something?”
Kaspar hesitated. Chris was strong. Everyone knew that, including Chris. But sometimes Chris thought being strong meant he couldn’t show vulnerability. He was already fighting against the fact that he was a carrier and that carriers never became alphas. It had never been a law, but carriers had been considered weak until recently. Some people still thought that. The last thing Chris needed was for people to think he was weak because he had emotions.
All of that was bullshit.
“You had a fight with Jacob,” Kaspar said.
Chris rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure everyone knows about that. We’re not exactly quiet when we fight.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Chris shrugged, and for one moment, he looked like the young man he was. He was younger than Kaspar by six years, way too young to become alpha. Luckily for him, that wouldn’t happen anytime soon. It didn’t mean he didn’t have responsibilities, though.
“My father wants me and Nico to go home,” Chris said.
“You already knew that would happen.”
“I knew it would happen from the time I got here. That’s not the problem.”
“Jacob is.”
Chris laughed darkly. “He definitely is. I never expected to fall in love when I got here. Hell, I thought I would hate it here. I didn’t want to leave home. I didn’t want to hide, and I thought I was strong enough to face the council and everyone else.”
“Hiding doesn’t mean you’re not strong.”
“I know. But I thought I couldn’t show people that I was afraid.”
Kaspar wasn’t sure if Chris had ever shown anyone he was afraid, but he didn’t point that out. Chris was talking to him, and that was the important thing. “You didn’t expect Jacob.”
“I didn’t. I thought once the carriers were safe, Nico and I would go home and go back to our lives. That’s what my father wants me to do. He wants me to go home so he can continue teaching me how to be the next alpha.”
“And that’s what you want, too.”
Chris bit his lower lip. “I’ve always known I couldn’t stay here forever. I’m not a badger shifter.”
“You know Thomas doesn’t care about that.” If anything, the badger alpha had been collecting shifter species. Two of his sons were married to bear shifters, while another was married to a weasel shifter. That wasn’t all. The carriers in the house all belonged to different shifter species who shared the forest with the badgers.
“Can you imagine my father’s face if I told him I want to stay?” Chris snorted. “I don’t think so. Besides, I always expected to go home. I didn’t think I would fall in love with Jacob, though.” He raked a hand through his hair. “Or for Jacob to be this stubborn.”
“You’re stubborn, too,” Kaspar pointed out.
Chris smiled at him. “You’re right. I am. I know I am. But I don’t want to leave him. I know I have to go home. My father won’t take no for an answer. He expects me to take my rightful place one day. And to do that, I have to know how to lead the pride. I have to learn what he has to teach me. I just don’t understand why Jacob won’t come with me.”
Kaspar took a risk and sat on the edge of Chris’s mattress. “Well, the cete needs him more than ever now.”
“Why? The carriers are safe.”
“For now, sure. But you know there’s a human team coming. They’re going to look at all of us, including the cete. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the shifters against us try something with the humans to get rid of Thomas. Besides, not all carriers have a home to go back to. Some of us are staying, and we’ll need people to protect us.”
“Everyone is safe here, though. The Bishop House is far away from the edge of badger terr
itory. I know Thomas is thinking about lowering the number of guards here. The carriers won’t be attacked. We have rights now, and everyone knows it.”
“There might be new laws in place, but it doesn’t mean everyone is going to follow them. Come on, Chris. You know better than that.”
“But it’s not fair. Why is the cete more important than me?”
Kaspar knew he had to be very careful about what he said. “This is his home, his family. It’s the place where he grew up, and where he thought he would live for the rest of his life.”
“And I get that. I do. But can’t he see that being the next alpha is more important?”
“Not to him. You said you want him to go with you?”
“Of course I do.”
“And he doesn’t want to. Why?”
“Because he doesn’t want to be the alpha mate. He doesn’t want to leave the cete. I should be more important than that, but I’m not.”
“So you’re going to break up?”
Chris’s eyes widened, and he shook his head. “Of course not. I’m sure we can find a compromise.”
“Can you, though? Because it looks to me like neither of you is ready to compromise. And the thing is, I understand where both of you are coming from. Being the next alpha is important to you. It’s something you’ve been groomed to be ever since you were born, and something everyone expects from you. You don’t want to disappoint your father. That’s noble. But I also understand why Jacob doesn’t want to go with you. He never expected to be an alpha mate, and it’s not an easy role to slip into. Besides, the two of you aren’t married, and we both know that your father won’t be happy if he ever finds out about your relationship.”
“That’s exactly why Jacob should come with me now. He could get used to being my husband and his role by my side. My father will see that Jacob is the right man for me once he gets to know him.”
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