“How many criminals have you killed?” Cloak asked.
“Enough,” I answered. “I don’t keep score.”
“It was a senseless waste of life all around,” Galahad said, surprising me. “I believe anyone can be redeemed given enough time and care.”
“I don’t,” I said, not wanting to spend too much time indulging in my own hypocrisy. “My doppelgänger did this so he could make the world look like he wanted it to. That’s beyond forgiveness.”
I’d killed a lot of people over the years. My alternate universe brother would be only the third I’d taken pleasure in. He’d taken five years from my life, did the same to Mandy, and killed Gabrielle’s father. Everything else, including his part in World War 3, was secondary. I couldn’t believe I’d once considered letting him go for helping Mandy get her soul back. I should have found a cure for her condition myself.
“Gary, is that you?” I heard Kerri’s voice behind me.
I spun around and grabbed her into a bear hug. “My beloved sister! My twin!”
“We’re not twins,” Kerri said, struggling for air.
“I know, but it’s nice to think of you as such!” I said, continuing to hug her but loosening my grip.
My sister was dressed in a long black dress that complemented her white skin and ash-white hair. She looked like Christina Ricci if Ricci were a Targaryen. Her hair was done up in an elaborate bun, and she wore a pair of bat-wing earrings. In her right hand was a dustbuster, and I saw her left had a wedding ring on it.
“Oh my God, you’re married!” I said, so pleased. “Who is it? It’s not Galahad, is it? Because if it is, he’s cheating on you and I have to drown him in firewater. Unless you’re cool with that, in which case marriage as a whole is a concept that has been wrecked around here.”
“Gary—” Mandy started to say.
Kerri blinked. “No, no, I got married to Dave Johnson over in accounting. You know, at the Merciless Entertainment Group?”
“Oh, yeah, that guy,” I said, not having a single clue who he was.
“He’s dead,” Kerri said.
“Oh,” I said, blinking.
“Yeah, a giant robot blasted him for not having his papers,” Kerri said, blinking.
“Shit,” I said, staring in horror. “Kerri, I’m so sorry.”
“Want to meet his spook?” Kerri said cheerfully. “We’re working out some details, but all marriages are about adjustment.”
My sister could see ghosts. I mentioned that, right?
“Maybe later,” I said, remembering it was technically my job to send ghosts to the other side.
“Dad?” A soft but surprisingly mature-sounding little girl’s voice spoke. “Is that you?”
I froze in place, my mouth going dry. My hands shook, and I didn’t know if I could look up to the source of the voice. I couldn’t help but remember Death showing me a vision of my dead daughter. In that vision, her name had been Mandy, and she was my daughter with my wife—but was the future really changed? Could it be another horrible fate awaited this daughter if I continued the path I was on? Should I consider just scooping her up, leaving reality, and never looking back?
“Only you can make that decision,” Cloak said.
“Would you have taken your family away and never become a superhero if you could have?” I mentally asked.
“I don’t know,” Cloak said. “Millions of people would have died and the world would have been a worse place if I had chosen my loved ones over being a hero. However, I can’t help but say the temptation would be real. Duty and love are enemies.”
“Only if you’re in the Night’s Watch,” I mentally replied. “Which is kind of a stupid set of oaths anyway. They wouldn’t have personnel problems if they’d passed down the job from father to son and daughter.”
“You’re trying to avoid looking at your daughter because the thought of being a father petrifies you.”
“You’re absolutely correct.”
Reluctantly, I looked up from where I was still hugging Kerri and saw my daughter standing beside Cindy. Gizmo was an entirely normal-looking, white-haired four-year-old wearing a pair of jean overalls, a blue Frozen t-shirt, and her hair tied in pigtails the same way her mother preferred. There was an intelligence and presence to her eyes that belied her age, though, as if a dozen people were thinking inside her head.
“I’ve brought my child,” Cindy said. “Which came from my body.”
Gizmo looked up. “Actually, you had me tubed after your second month of pregnancy.”
“Thank God for Venusian medical technology,” Cindy said. “Those were the hardest two months of my life.”
Gizmo rolled her eyes.
“Hey,” Cindy said, staring down at her. “Wait until you’re a teenager to be disrespectful.”
“No,” Gizmo said.
“That’s my girl,” Cindy said, smiling and rubbing Gizmo’s hair.
“Stop that,” Gizmo said, grimacing. “I can turn you to stone with my inventions.”
I broke away from hugging Kerri to hug her instead.
“You’re just how I always imagined my daughter to be,” I whispered.
Chapter Ten
BEING A FATHER IS MY GREATEST CHANCE FOR VILLAINY YET
I stared into my beautiful daughter’s eyes, soaking up her appearance and trying to burn it into my memory. There was little chance she wasn’t my daughter, since her features looked like a perfect combination of Cindy’s and my own. I could “feel” her magical aura, and it was tinged with the same supernatural inclination to death and destruction that affected both me and my sister. Plus, she had Targaryen hair like mine, and that was difficult to replicate.
Gizmo reached up then and placed her hand on my head. In that moment, I felt her presence in my mind, shuffling around my memories. I’d dealt with telepaths before, and they tended to dislike entering my mind due to Cloak’s presence. This time, though, I let down all my defenses and allowed my daughter to rummage through my mind. The only parts I blocked off were those inappropriate for children.
Which, OK, was a lot of my mind.
After several moments, Gizmo pulled away her hand. “Wow, you have watched a lot of cartoons.”
I shrugged. “Well, I wouldn’t say a lot. Average, I’d say.”
“What’s an Evangelion?” Gizmo asked.
“No one knows,” I said. “So, you’re psychic, huh?”
“Mmm-hmm,” Gizmo said. “I’m also super smart like Mister Inventor. Except my super intelligence is an actual superpower because I’m four and know how to build a spaceship.”
“I knew how to build a spaceship at your age too,” I said, smiling. “It was made of four cardboard boxes and packing tape.”
“I doubt that would achieve orbital velocity,” Gizmo said. “Not to mention go past lightspeed.”
“Clearly, you didn’t take into account my reactor core powered by imagination. Cindy hasn’t been keeping up with your education. More Sesame Street for you!”
“Sesame Street depresses me,” Gizmo said, sighing. “That poor homeless green man.”
I shook my head. “You noticed that too, huh?”
“He has a home! It’s in the garbage can! Which leads to a magical place!” Kerri piped in, appalled.
I sighed. “That’s just what he tells people to preserve his dignity.”
Mandy stared at us, then shook her head. “This is almost too adorable.”
Cindy shrugged. “Eh, she does that. She likes to be all cute so you want to love and protect her.”
Mandy gave Cindy a stare.
“What?” Cindy said.
“Who’s the Eurasian goth lady?” Gizmo said, referring to Mandy. “I mean, obviously I know, but I want to make introductions before I lead you to my superhero lair.”
“Superhero lair?” I asked.
“Her room,” Kerri said. “She says it’s unfair that supervillains are the only ones who get elaborate underground bases. It’s one of t
he things she intends to fix when she takes over the world.”
“World conquest is her goal as a superhero?” I asked.
“That’s another thing she intends to fix as a superhero,” Kerri said. “I had her checked for malign hypercognition disorder, but the doctors say that’s only in Soon I Will Be Invincible.”
“Well, I’m afraid superheroes are already starting to take over the world, so there won’t be a need for reform by the time she’s an adult.” I set down my daughter. “Gizmo, this is Mandy. Mandy, Gizmo. Mandy is my vampire superhero wife.”
“Cool!” Gizmo said. “Do you know the Count? He’s the only part of that show that uplifts me. I mean, yes, he has a serious neurological condition, but he’s not killing anyone.”
Mandy stared at her. “Yes, yes I know him quite well.”
“Did you know the whole counting thing is a real vampire weakness?” I said to Cindy. “I once spilled salt on the table and Mandy was angry at me for a week.”
“You’re lucky I’m good at math or I would have done a lot more than be angry,” Mandy said. “In any case, it’s lovely to meet you, Gizmo.”
“It’s nice to meet you as well, Mandy,” Gizmo said. “My mom thinks all sorts of interesting things about you!”
“I deny everything!” Cindy said. “Who are you going to believe, me or this innocent child?”
Kerri felt her face. “In any case, it’s great to see you again, Gary. Please tell me you’re not going to try to fight a rebellion against your evil clone from an alternate dimension.”
“Doppelgänger from a past universe,” Gizmo corrected.
“What she said,” I replied. “Sorry, Kerri, but someone has to make sure the world is safe from benevolent tyrants.”
Amanda glared at me.
“I said tyrant.” I shrugged. “I would love to see your room, Gizmo.”
Honestly, I should have been working on a way to defeat Other Gary, but I didn’t want to. I wanted to focus on meeting this special, wonderful person who had just entered my life. Some people might have thought it strange to have such a wealth of feelings for someone they’d just met, but I treasured Gizmo, Leia Buffy Ripley Wakowski-Karkofsky, more than anyone on the Earth save Mandy now.
More than myself.
“On the contrary, this is you at your least strange,” Cloak said.
“Are you going to marry my mother?” Gizmo asked, her voice echoing in my mind alongside Cloak’s.
“Uh,” I responded, surprised at her presence. I could have made up a lie or spoken to her condescendingly, but I decided to tell the truth. “I don’t think that’s going to happen, Leia.”
“Gizmo, please,” Gizmo said. “It’s okay, I know you feel differently about her than you do about your wife.”
“Can you hear Cloak?” I asked.
“Oh, yeah, why wouldn’t I?” Gizmo said. “Our entire family is like directly descended from Death through Cain.”
That was the first I’d heard of that. It also made a lot of the times Death seemed to hit on me even weirder. “OK.”
“Nice to meet you,” Cloak said. “I’ve been trying to encourage Gary to be more accommodating to your mother. In my day, we had morals. You took care of your mistress when she had your illegitimate child.”
Gizmo giggled at that description, thankfully not taking Lancel Warren’s decidedly 1930s view of the world too seriously.
“Shut up, Cloak,” I muttered. “Really.”
I’d had a lot of time to think about how I felt about Cindy while trapped in Undertown. At least, when I wasn’t drugged and brainwashed out of my skull. I was attracted to her, considered her to be my best friend, and would die as well as kill for her. The thing was, that was a different sort of feeling than what I’d felt for Mandy and even Gabrielle before her. Close enough that I might have once confused the two kinds of love, but distinct nevertheless. Maybe it could have been more once, but that time had passed long ago.
“Do you regret being with her?” Gizmo asked me mentally. “My mom?”
I closed my eyes. “No, because you were born from it. Also, this is a way, way too mature conversation for you at your age. You shouldn’t know where babies come from. Ask about it when you’re fifty.”
“Of course I know where babies come from! I’m psychic. I mean, it’s weird and gross, but most people think about the process all the time. At least the making of them.”
“They come from Kamino cloning tanks,” I mentally interjected. “Anything you’ve seen in other people’s minds is mistaken. Just forget it. Forget it all.”
Gizmo rolled her eyes. “Oh, Dad.”
“Don’t do that either,” I said aloud. “Your eyes will get stuck that way.”
Cindy laughed. “See what Kerri has to deal with as a mother?”
Kerri glared at her. “I’d complain about raising my brother’s children, but Gary paid me one point five billion dollars, so I can’t complain too much.”
“You ever get that money back from the government?” I asked.
Kerri nodded. “Oh yes, I gave it away to feed the starving and cure the sick.”
I stared at her, then choked and cocked my head to one side before strangling the air in front of her. Thankfully, I couldn’t do the Darth Vader force choke.
Kerri grinned. “I knew you’d approve of what I did with the money you stole!”
I tried to speak for several more seconds, but it came out sounding like the Black Speech of Mordor. “Wh—whah . . . why?”
Kerri smiled. “Oh, it just wouldn’t be proper to keep it.”
Gizmo proceeded to take my hand and drag me along to her room. I could feel her telekinesis assisting her otherwise easy-to resist-grip. Either that or she was the world’s strongest four-year-old.
“Almost five!” Gizmo corrected me, apparently listening to my thoughts.
Mandy burst out laughing before covering her face. “Gary, I’m genuinely impressed. She’s definitely your daughter.”
“Who else’s would she be?” Cindy said, putting her hands on her hips.
Mandy stared at her, then raised an eyebrow.
Cindy looked away. “Touché.”
Gizmo’s room was just down the hall, and I had to say it wasn’t at all what I expected. Well, that wasn’t true, as I was expecting anything but a normal little girl’s room, which this was most certainly not. In truth, it looked a lot more like a garage, with countless shelves full of junk and machinery ranging from Venusian spare parts to old television sets.
The walls were covered in cartoon posters and there was a staggering amount of My Little Pony dolls about—except she’d apparently made the majority into cyborgs. I also saw she was a Star Wars fan, but apparently of a cartoon I hadn’t watched yet called Rebels. The bed had little Death Star sheets on it, which I found to be vaguely worrying.
I shook my head, staring at the massive pile of junk. “Cindy lets you play with all this?”
“Cindy is all about something she calls free-range parenting,” Gizmo said, dragging me into the center of the room. “I don’t actually think that’s a thing, or if it is, she understands it very well.”
I smiled. “Probably not. How did you learn all of this?”
“Oh. Well, when I was born I downloaded all of my mother’s memories and Mister Inventor’s memories and some of Kerri’s. Then I started sorting through them. Mostly, I ditched the stuff that wasn’t relevant to a newborn but kept the technical data as well as language skills.”
I stared at her, figuring that out. “Uh-huh. So, you’re less an adorable baby genius girl and more like Saint Alia of the Knife.”
“That’s a Dune reference, right?”
“Yep.”
“Didn’t bother to remember it. No ponies.”
I smirked at that. “Every piece of media can be improved by the addition of ponies.”
“I agree,” Gizmo said, going over to a pile of junk and starting to sort through it. “Except Inspector Gadget. That
show is fine the way it is. I strongly identify with the main character.”
I looked at my daughter. “You mean his eight-year-old super genius niece, don’t you?”
“Who else?” Gizmo giggled.
I was thinking of other cool things to say to my daughter when I heard a rumbling noise behind me. Turning around, I saw an eight-foot-tall golden-metal android that looked like an armored giant’s skeleton. On the chest plate, I could see a red M in a circle with a sideways bar over it.
“Target Located: Merciful: The Superhero With Mercy™,” a deep and threatening voice spoke. “Murderbot-1 commencing elimination.”
“Meep,” I said, moving to freeze it before it grabbed me by the cape and slammed me against the floor. It then continued to spin me around in a way that made me incredibly dizzy. I barely managed to turn intangible and pass through it. I almost blasted it with fire before realizing my daughter was in the room.
Murderbot-1 then spun its entire torso around and swung at my head. I barely ducked under it. I turned intangible and jammed my fist inside it, conjuring white-hot flame that melted much of its torso’s insides.
Murderbot-1 let out a creepy metallic laugh. “Engaging strange-dimensional energy death-ray eyes.”
Its eyes began to glow as I pulled my hands out and levitated under the ground to pull it down with me into the floor.
“STOP!” my daughter shouted.
Murderbot-1 and I both did.
“For shame, Murderbot! This is Merciless, not Merciful!” Gizmo said, walking up. “Dad, did you melt his interior circuits? Those are needed to power his crowd control attacks! It’s going to take months to fix! Wait, unless I build something to fix it for me. Hmm.”
“Sorry, mistress,” Murderbot said, sounding less than pleased.
“Switch to lovable cockney accent!” Gizmo said.
“Eh, sorry mistress,” Murderbot said, sounding less like an actual person from London and more like Dick Van Dyke. “Poppin’ good time, what?”
“My London gangster friends would shiv him for that,” I muttered. “As soon as they figured out how.”
Cindy, Mandy, and Kerri arrived seconds later, having apparently been caught up talking in the hallway.
The Supervillainy Saga (Book 4): The Science of Supervillainy Page 9