"A dream?"
"You let out an awful scream," he said, pulling my hair from my wet face.
"I'm sorry," I gasped, sitting up. I rubbed my hands over my face, trying to calm down. My heart was still thumping a million miles an hour.
"What was it about?"
I pointed to my arm and he knew. Collapsing back into bed, I couldn't help it when the tears started to flow. The dream had been so vivid it was like an action replay. Dee slid into bed behind me and circled his arm around my waist as sob after sob burst out of me.
"What happened?" he whispered into my hair.
"He called me... My arm," I choked out between heavy breaths.
"Did he hurt you?" Dee said quietly, knowing I was talking about Will. "If he even..."
"He didn't hurt me."
He held me for a long time, waiting for me to calm down.
Finally he said, "What happened?"
"Nothing," I whispered. I couldn't say it.
"Something must have," he said. "It's you and me, Zo. Just you and me."
He forced me to turn around and look at him. The room was dark, but the muted light from the street outside filtered in and I could just make out the familiar features of his face. Tucking my hair behind my ear, he kissed my forehead and I breathed in his familiar smell of leather and musk.
"He kissed me," I whispered.
"That's not a bad thing, Zo."
"He called me baby. It… when he said it all these things came back. Memories. My arm…"
"Did he hurt your arm?"
"No. He didn't hurt me. He didn't. It was weird. It felt like that night. The pain."
"Shit, Zoe," Dee cursed, pulling me against his chest.
"I panicked. I'm sorry."
"God," he murmured into my hair. "I understand, Zo. I get it. After everything, I get it."
"I can't just wake up one day and decide that I'm over it. You know I haven't let anyone in. No one but you. It's not easy."
"I know, Zoe. I know."
"I can't."
"You can. When you're ready. I think you're ready."
"I don't want to get hurt again. I can't. I can't go through that again."
"He's not Jason," Dee said. "He's nothing like that prick. I was wrong about Will, Zo. He's alright. He's one of the good ones. That guy would go to hell and back for you."
I didn't know what to say to that, I was too afraid to believe. I just buried myself harder against my best friend.
"Remember when he almost beat up on that guy for just talking to you? He wants you bad and I think you should let him in. I mean, he'll protect you from sleazy guys like me. That's ten points right there. And he's got nice shoes. I know how you are with shoes."
I don't know where he heard about that night from, but everything else he said was right. The only one who had a problem with it was me.
"I know it's hard, but you've gotta face it."
"I know."
"I can only help you so much. The last bit you've gotta do on your own."
"Mmm," I murmured.
"Are you okay now?" I knew he meant the dream, so I nodded.
He went to let me go, but I grasped hold of him tighter. "Stay."
He let out a small laugh and pulled the cover up over my shoulders. "The day I get a girlfriend, Zo, she's going to be a jealous wreck."
"I want to see her resume first."
He ran a hand through my hair. "There's the Zoe I know and love. Don't let her get away again."
The way he said it made it sound easy. But, the conversation I would have to have with Will tomorrow would be one of the hardest things I would ever have to do. And I still didn't know which way it was going to go.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Will
Giving Zoe space was one of the hardest things I'd had to do. I just wanted to go and make it better, comfort her. I wanted to take her in my arms and never let go. But, Dee had said to give her some time. He knew her better than anyone and I had to trust him.
The show the other night had been gut wrenching. I mean, they sounded great as per usual, but something was missing from Zoe. The spark she had was all but gone and it broke my heart knowing that I might've had something to do with it. Afterwards, she'd just left and the whole day after, she'd didn't come out to dinner or anywhere.
This morning she'd even rode with Simone again. Something she hadn't done since I'd been such a jerk to her. Dee had just shrugged and pulled me onto the bus. He never said a word to me about what was going on and his devotion to her was admirable. I mean, they weren't related, but he was her family. Her brother. To anyone on the outside, they looked like they were together. I'd thought the same thing at first. I totally got them now.
Today's sound check was already turning into another muted affair and as the support did their thing, I sat in a corner and just watched everyone go too and fro, putting Tab A into Tab B. That's when Zoe wandered by, not noticing me in the shadows and my heart clenched.
I watched as she went into the band room, her shoulders hunched. She looked utterly defeated. I waited to see if she would reappear and after twenty minutes had gone by, no one had gone in or out. Dee had told me to give her some time, but I was out of patience. I had to do something. I was done feeling powerless while she was hurting.
Taking a deep breath, I strode over and opened the door.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
ZOE
I sat in the band room on a beat up couch as the support band did their sound check. They're muffled, but their music filtered into the room regardless of the soundproofing. Leaning forward, elbows on my knees I rubbed my tired eyes, glad for the short reprieve from the drama. Ever since the other day after the pool, I'd been strung so tight, it was no wonder I'd had such a violent dream. My life was spinning out of control and I had no idea how to reign it back in.
I still hadn't confronted Will to apologise. Dee had said that I'd scared the shit out of him and he was just as strung out as I was. Truth was, I just don't know how to say what I wanted to. I didn’t know how much I should say. I knew I should tell him the entire truth, but I wasn't ready to hear it myself.
When I heard the door open, my head snapped up and caught sight of Will closing it behind him, his back firmly against the door. My breathing instantly picked up and my heart thudded painfully inside my chest. His eyes were on me and they were full of fire. Anger, lust, I don't know.
"Zoe." His voice was so low and husky and I instantly felt my body respond. Damn it.
I didn't say anything. I just watched him stare at me with a fierce look that seemed a lot like hunger.
"What happened?" he asked.
I struggled with what to say. Either I didn't want to, or I was that mesmerised by his presence. I didn't count on this conversation going the way it was headed.
His brows knitted together in a frown and he crossed the room, slowly and deliberately, sitting on the couch next to me. He was careful not to touch me, though I was aware that he'd lowered his lips a mere inch from my ear. My heart thumped so hard in my chest, I was positive he could hear it.
"I meant it," he murmured. "When I said I'd wanted you for a long time."
My breathing hitched as his hot breath tickled my neck.
"I will never do anything to hurt you. Ever."
Somehow, I managed to speak. "Will…"
"Zoe." His hand was on my face, making me look up at him. "How do you go up to a beautiful woman and not have her think you're only in it for the sex? I didn't want you to think you were like those other women," he said. "I want to know you. I want to know everything about you. I've never not had the guts to talk to anyone before. I still don't know what it was about you that night. But, I saw you in that crowd and you were different. I can't describe it."
I closed my eyes for a moment, just giving into the feeling of it. The fact that he might feel the exact same longing I felt for him almost undid me. At first I thought I might have been imagining it, but I felt the
back of his fingers trailing down the skin of my cheek and every place he's touched burned. Despite all the things I had gone over in my mind to try and convince myself I wasn't ready, I wanted him. I wanted him so much it hurt.
"Zoe," he said again. "I can't live another day and not know you."
Opening my eyes, I found his stormy grey staring back and it's a look so intense I can't not do something about it. So, for the first time since I'd laid eyes on him, I gave in. I slid my palm up his face, over the stubble that I found so irresistible and into his hair. His mouth fell open slightly, lips parting. His breathing picked up as he leant into my hand.
"Zoe?" It was hardly audible.
"Yeah?" I whispered back.
"If you don't stop touching me, I won't be able to stop myself from kissing you."
I dragged my nails lightly down the back of his head, through his hair and down his neck, pulling him towards me. "Then do it," I murmured against his lips.
This time, his kiss was slow and deliberate. He teased me with the tip of his tongue, lightly grazing it across my bottom lip, before claiming me completely. My entire body came alive at the slightest touch and it felt just as consuming as before.
His hand hooked under my knee, tugging me towards him. Following his lead, I straddled him, my hair falling around us like a curtain, shutting out the world. Grinding against him, he let out a deep moan into my mouth and I could feel how hard he was already. I felt the effect I had on him echo deep inside me and it took all of my strength not to guide his hands under my shirt.
"God," he rumbled against my lips. "What have you done to me?"
I ran a hand along his jaw, delighting in the rasp of the stubble that always coated it, knowing I was done. That kiss had just blown whatever strangled excuse I had tried to formulate right out of the water. I couldn't stay away now. If this ended badly, then it would be a billion times worse than the last time, but I didn't care. It was too late. Will had wormed his way inside my heart, through all the walls I had built around it and I wanted him to stay there. He had done it without me even knowing.
"I'm sorry," he gasped through heavy breaths. "For trying to make you jealous. I'm such a jerk."
"You are." My lips curved into a small smile and the ghost of that lopsided grin I'd come to fantasise over tugged at his.
"I like you, Zoe. So much. I didn't know how to handle it. I still don't know."
"Neither do I." His hands squeezed my hips gently, making me squirm against him.
"What happened?" he asked again, the concern in his voice tugging at my heart. "Did I do something to hurt you?"
"No," I whispered, winding my hands in his hair. "When you called me baby, it brought back something I'd rather forget."
"What?"
I hesitated, not wanting to give all the details. I wasn't sure if I remembered them all anyway. I dragged my teeth over my bottom lip, eyes downcast.
Will brought a thumb up and caressed it across my lips, making me let go.
"I went through a bad break up."
"Does it have something to do with your scar?"
I stiffened at his words and there was no way he could have missed it. "It had a bad effect on me," I said, blatantly ignoring him. "I lost all my friends and my home. Dee saved me."
"Zoe..." I could see the pity in his eyes and I didn't like it. I didn't want it.
"Don't."
"I would never hurt you," he said fiercely, his hands leaving my hips and winding through my hair.
"I know."
He pressed his lips against mine again and after everything we'd just confided in each other, it was the most intense kiss I'd ever had. Will's entire body shuddered beneath me and he only had to shift his pelvis against mine and I would have came then and there.
"While we're on the confession thing," I said carefully, "I do remember you that night. You know, at that gig."
"But, you said you didn't."
I shrugged.
"Zo," he scolded me with a chuckle.
"You raised your eyebrows at me," I smiled. "Very hot."
"You think I'm hot," he declared and the intensity of a moment ago shifted into something lighter.
"Does that work on all the girls?"
"Eventually." The smile fell from his face and he let his gaze rake over my features, to my lips and back into my eyes. "You're beautiful, Zoe Granger. You know that?"
He said it with such determination and raw hunger, that I believed him. I hadn't thought I was remotely pretty or worth knowing for a long time and now? "I'm beginning to believe it when you say it like that."
"I'm going to tell you every day." He captured my mouth again, sucking on my bottom lip, dragging his teeth against the skin. Gasping, I clutched the back of his head, pulling him closer. The feeling of his tongue against mine was consuming as our kiss deepened. My skin began to prickle in excitement as his fingertips brushed over my back, creeping underneath my shirt and his fingers hovered just below the waistband of my jeans.
I had to move then, grinding myself forward over his erection and pushing against my clit. We both let out a tortured moan, breathing hard. It felt so overwhelming and we were both still fully clothed.
"Don't move," he murmured against my lips.
I didn't have to ask why.
"Not here," he whispered, kissing the corner of my jaw, right underneath my ear.
"Later," I said, and it came out as a low gasp as I felt his tongue tease against my neck.
"We'll see."
I went to move off him, but he grabbed my hips, holding me in place.
"Are you trying to drive me mad?" I asked with a small smile.
"I don't want to let you go," he kissed my forehead. "We've got a minute. Give me this minute."
We sat together for a moment, and previously it would have been awkward as hell, but now it was the most natural thing in the world. We fit together. I knew it and so did he.
Suddenly, a thought crossed my mind. The day we were told about the tour, Simone and Dee had both said The Stabs had asked for us. Did Will…? "When we were asked on this tour, we were told you guys asked for us."
"Yes."
"Did you know it was me?"
"I went to your first gig," he said carefully. "I saw you on that stage and I almost died. You were the last person I was expecting to see."
"I wasn't expecting it either."
"You stood next to me at the bar and said, hey."
"Dee yanked me away."
"I'll never forget the look on your face," he smiled, tracing my bottom lip with a thumb. "Until that moment, I thought you were a ghost."
"I can assure you I'm totally solid."
Will groaned at my joke. "We heard your song on the radio and we were told that you'd signed with our label. Then I saw your video." He licked his lips, almost sending my body into overdrive. "I'd hoped I'd see you again, but I never did."
"You asked for us."
He nodded, slowly. "I drove Pete nuts with my pining over a mystery woman. With him, Louie and Sticks, we had enough sway to get you guys on tour. The fact that you're beyond brilliant helped, of course."
"You really are a class A jerk, Will Strickland."
His eyes snapped up to meet mine and fear flashed through them. Trailing my fingers across his lips, I smirked and he let out a sigh of relief.
"Zoe," he scolded me. "You'll give me a heart attack."
"I think my heart does that every time I see you."
"Well," he said wickedly, "let me start it again for you."
This was getting dangerously close to something else and I was suddenly aware of where we were, but I didn't care one bit. Will's hands were back in my hair, holding my mouth firmly to his.
We both jumped as the door banged open and Dee walked in. When his eyes landed on us and our position, he stifled a surprised laugh.
"Oh, shit," he exclaimed. "Didn't realise."
"It's okay, Dee," I said, reluctantly getting up. I really needed to co
ol off.
"We need to sound check."
"Okay, I'll be there in a sec."
He looked at us with a sly smile and closed the door behind him.
"I get it now," Will said, pulling my back flush with his chest. "You and Dee."
"He means well."
"He loves you." When I tensed, he said, "Not like that. He's your family. They all are. I mean I know, I have my own."
"What did he say to you?"
"When?"
"After… what did he tell you?"
Will was quiet for a moment and I wasn't sure if that churning in my stomach was dread. "Nothing. He told me it wasn't his place."
"And it's not." It came out a little harsher than I intended.
"I'd go to hell and back for you. Anything you want from me, it's yours." His hands settled on my hips and I pressed my backside into his hard on and couldn't help but smile as he let out a low moan. "God, Zoe."
"You better stay in here a while," I said, hoping that he really meant every word. "You need to calm down."
As I walked out of the room, I looked back and gave him a sly smile. The tension that had weighed itself on my shoulders had all but disappeared. If one kiss from Will could do that, then what else could he do? Just thinking about it made that place between my legs throb.
"You're wicked, Zoe Granger," he grimaced as I closed the door behind me.
Out on stage, Chris was helping Frank set up the drum kit and Dee was fiddling with the leads that ran into his effects pedals. When his eye caught mine, I steeled myself for one of his trademark witty comments.
As I plugged the lead into my guitar Dee asked, "You guys good?"
"Yeah," I said, thankful that he was serious for once.
"So, are you like together now?"
I shrugged.
"Sure looked like it."
"I guess."
He knelt down and began tuning his Gibson, his E string all out of whack. "Did you tell him what you told me?"
"The short version."
He eyed me with suspicion. "How short?"
"Bare minimum."
"Zoe, things like this have a tendency to rear their ugly heads when you least expect it. Keeping secrets isn't a good thing."
The Devil's Tattoo Page 14