“What about you?” she tossed back. “What if I want to go to college? Are you committed to me enough to follow me to whichever school I get accepted?”
“That’s not the same thing,” I argued. “I have no problem following you around until you finish school and have chosen your career of choice. I’m talking about my permanent position in Rýkr. I’m the fucking crown prince. It’s all I’ve ever known.”
“You’re asking me to cement myself to people who I might come to hate, Easton,” she replied. “What about my happiness?” Then she shook her hear. “I thought you didn’t even like your parents,” she added. “Suddenly, you want to take your rightful place by their side.”
“You’re missing the fucking point.”
“And you’re making this harder than it needs to be,” she accused. “We have no idea what’s going to happen tomorrow. Plus, we still have months to decide anything since it’s been agreed upon that me and Avalon will finish school. Why are you pushing this now?”
“Because I fucking love you!” I thundered. “Because I fucking love you and you seem to not give a fuck. It’s fucking killing me, but you couldn’t seem to muster up enough fucks to give about it.”
“But do you?” she asked too calmly for my liking.
“Do I what?”
“Do you love me?” she asked. “How do you know it’s love and not just the bond, Easton? Because I don’t know the difference. You want me to return the sentiment, but how in the hell do I know what I’m feeling?” Neve stepped to me. “Your father did more than just mess with our childhoods, Easton. He damaged our futures. Maybe not detrimentally, but because I was raised to believe relationships developed differently than how you were raised to believe they developed, I’ll never know if you love me because I captivate you or if you love me because you’ve been conditioned to believe that you have to.” She let out a sad laugh. “I know that I want you, Easton. I know that I need you, too. However, I have no idea if I love you. None at all.”
She was right.
She was right, and I was going to kill my father because I didn’t know how else to erase the fury that I felt inside at hearing this girl tell me she wasn’t sure if she could ever love me. At the rage of hearing her tell me that she didn’t believe that I loved her.
I knew it was love, though.
Didn’t I?
I took a deep, steady breath and took a step back. I needed air. I needed…something.
Finally, I gave her a terse nod. “Well, I did say I didn’t care if you didn’t love me back, right?”
“Easton-”
“Don’t sweat it, Neve,” I said, anger shaking me to my core. “I won’t ever mention it again.” I turned and left her standing alone in the classroom because I didn’t know what else to do.
I was going to fucking kill Astra.
Chapter 20
Neve~
We had taken two cars; me, Avalon, Mom, and Dad in one car with Severus, Easton, and Griffin in the other, and I was thanking God for small favors. It was a four-hour drive, and I did not need to be trapped in a car with an icy Easton sitting next to me. After he left me standing in Mr. Mallory’s class yesterday, he had gone back to ignoring me the rest of the day. Only, this time, I wasn’t sure if I didn’t deserve it.
It didn’t matter if I was still confused about our situation, I never should have dismissed his declaration of love so easily. While I might not know what it was that I was feeling, that didn’t mean he didn’t know what he was feeling. After all, he knew more about all this than I did. And even if he had been brainwashed into believe that he should love me, that didn’t mean that he didn’t really love me. I was speaking for his emotions as if I knew what he was feeling, and I had no idea what Easton was feeling.
As for committing to him, that had been resentment and stubbornness rearing their ugly heads. Easton had challenged me, and it had been an unwanted reminder that I didn’t have a choice where he was concerned. If Easton wanted to return to Rýkr to take his rightful place, I didn’t see where I had a choice but to follow him. Regardless of what he believed, his cold shoulder had been taking its toll on me all week. I had felt his absence like a piece of my soul had been missing. I still felt that way. I’ve just been so used to playing a part, putting up a fake façade for so long, that it had been easy to slip that mask back on. Avalon and I have been pretending to be normal for so long, faking it came naturally.
And now, in the car heading towards Rýkr, I had to decide the rest of my life. No matter what’s been promised, Easton was the firstborn, and I didn’t want to dismiss his entire existence the same way I had dismissed his claims of love for me.
“Hey, are you okay?” my sister asked me, the music in the car giving us a small amount of privacy.
“Not really,” I admitted.
“You and Easton still fighting?” she asked, concern etched all over her face.
“We’re not really fighting,” I semi-lied. “Just…just still trying to find our way, I suppose.”
Avalon nodded. “I get that.”
“Hey, can I ask you something?” She nodded. “Does…does Griffin tell you he loves you?”
My sister’s entire face lit up as she smiled. “Yeah, he does. All the time, actually.”
“How do you know it’s love and not the bond?” I asked, hoping she had something helpful for me.
Her nose scrunched up as she thought about her words. Finally, she said, “Well, I don’t know that it’s not the bond. I mean, I can’t see inside his heart, you know. I can’t feel what he feels. I only know what he tells me, and I choose to believe that he believes those words when he says them to me. Even if it is the bond, Griffin believes that it’s not. He believes that he loves me, so…I believe that he does.”
Her unwavering faith in what is and was always took me by surprise. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Do you love him?” I asked. “Do you know if it’s love for you or the bond?”
“It’s love for me,” she answered easily. “I know it sounds silly since I haven’t known him that long, but I feel like it’s love.”
“How can you tell the difference?”
She started chewing on her bottom lip. I knew it was hard to put feelings into words, but I needed help if I was going to be able to make things right with Easton. I didn’t relish being miserable for the rest of my life, especially if this past week was any hint to what that would feel like.
Finally, she said, “The bond is what draws me to him,” she said, starting to explain the best way she could. “It’s what makes being away from him so hard.” She let out a deep breath. “I don’t feel complete when I’m not with him, but I’m still able to feel other emotions. His absence or presence doesn’t dictate my ability to laugh, cry, get angry, or anything like that. I don’t miss him when he’s not with me, I feel incomplete, and there is a difference.” Avalon shook her head. “I don’t know how to explain it.”
“You don’t feel as if the bond has manipulated your ability to love Griffin?”
“No, I don’t think so,” she replied. “The bond was there before I even met him, Neve. It was there when I didn’t want to even like him. It was there when I fought against all this. The bond has always existed. My feelings for Griffin haven’t. They didn’t start to develop until I finally stopped fighting this and gave him a chance. They didn’t start to develop until we started spending every day together. If the bond had any impact on my love for him, then it would have been love at first sight, no?” She shrugged. “I’m in love with Griffin, Neve.”
Her words were slicing me down the middle. Avalon made it sound so simple, but it was anything but simple. Emotions were a messy business, and this situation with Easton was just getting messier by the minute.
“Easton told me he loved me, and I couldn’t accept that it was that simple,” I confessed. “I questioned it and told him I wasn’t sure what I felt for him.”
Her face
fell in sympathy. “Oh, Neve, I’m sorry.”
“It was stupid, and I was just feeling combative again,” I admitted. “I thought I had come to terms with the bond after Monday night, but I guess this trip has strummed up all that resentment again. Plus, Easton was acting like a dick all week, so I was just…annoyed, I guess. I don’t know.”
Avalon grabbed my hand in hers. “So, you explain and apologize, then move past this,” she said. “Do not cut your nose off to spite your face, Neve.”
“That’s not what I’m doing,” I insisted. “I’m just pissed off and Easton is the only target available.”
“So, we meet Astra and Calliope Keenstone, unload all our misery, then we figure the rest of it out together.”
I eyed my sister. “Was Mom right?” I asked. “Are you ready to settle down with Griffin.”
Avalon grinned. “Not tomorrow,” she teased. “But she wasn’t entirely wrong. I can see myself marrying Griffin right after I graduate. I can see myself just being with him.”
“A stay-at-home wife and mother?”
“No, not exactly,” she corrected. “More like…I want a job that’s family friendly. I don’t want to work long hours and never get to see him. I don’t want life to get in the way of love like it often can. I want dinner together every night and weekends sleeping in.” She shrugged. “Things like that.”
“What’s Griffin want to do with his life? Has he said?”
“The plan was for him to take his place with his family as Rýkr’s city executive assistant to his father’s position as mayor.” She shrugged again. “Easton was supposed to become the assistant mayor under his father.”
I rolled my eyes. “How ridiculous is it to call them that? Like they’re normal people or something.” Then her words hit clearer. “What do you mean, was?”
“Griffin has made it clear that he’ll follow me anywhere I want to go after graduation,” she replied. “He’s not overly concerned with what the plan was before I came along.”
“I think Easton wants to return to Rýkr after I graduate,” I told her. “Not only was his love for me being questioned during our fight, but my commitment to him was brought up, too.”
Before Avalon could comment, Dad turned down the radio and said, “We’re almost there. Another ten minutes or so.”
“Okay,” Avalon acknowledged.
Mom turned around in her seat. “Are you girls okay?”
I nodded. “We’re fine, Mom,” I semi-lied again. “A little nervous, but fine.”
Her eyes swung over towards my sister. “Avalon?”
“I’m fine, Mom,” she assured her. “I promise.”
My lip twitched. “How are you feeling?”
She arched a brow. “Don’t get sassy, young lady,” she teased back.
Mom turned back in her seat as Dad said, “No matter what happens, we go in there as a family. I don’t give a shit who these people are.” All three of us smiled at Dad’s announcement. Whatever my father was, he wasn’t a coward. “Understood?”
“Sure thing, Dad,” I answered.
“No problem,” Avalon added.
“Yes, dear,” Mom said as she reached over and patted him on the leg.
The rest of the ride was made in silence. Avalon was looking out the window at all the beautiful forest scenery we were driving through while Mom and Dad were deep in thought. And though I was also deep in thought, it wasn’t with thoughts of Rýkr. It was thoughts of Easton.
He was owed an apology and I just hoped I was able to give him one before we were scheduled to meet with his parents. I was already feeling uneasy, I didn’t need to go to our meeting feeling more out of sorts than I already was.
Plus, I missed him.
I missed Easton.
Letting out a deep sigh, maybe it was love.
Chapter 21
Easton~
Severus had called ahead and informed our parents that we planned on resting from the drive before meeting with them. Speaking for me, Griff, and Severus, we didn’t really need any rest. I just wanted to buy some time to get my shit together before the meeting.
Things were still precarious between me and Neve, and I felt strung tighter than a drum. When we arrived in Rýkr, Mr. Lively had driven his car to one of the local tourist hotels we had in town. He had rented a room for himself and his wife while renting a separate room right across the hallway for Neve and Avalon.
We had pulled in behind them and had waited for them to get settled in. Once they’d gotten comfortable, Griffin had taken Avalon for a tour of Rýkr, leaving Severus to head home and leaving me standing in front of Neve’s hotel room door.
I knocked, and she was answering the door a few seconds later. She looked surprised to see me, and that just aggravated me more. “Easton? What are you doing here?”
“See,” I said as I muscled my way past her. “The fact that you’re surprised to see me is just pissing me off more.”
I turned around as she shut the door behind her, locking it for good measure. “Did you really come over just to start another fight, Easton?”
“I’m here because I’m sick of this shit, Neve,” I snapped. “Right now, I don’t give a fuck about anything or anyone but you. Do you get that? Do you have any fucking clue what this discord between us is doing to me?”
“You’re acting like I don’t feel it, too,” she fired back. “But you’re wrong, Easton. I do.”
I was on her before another word was spoken. Her back hit the wall, my palms flat on either side of her head. “I love you, Neve,” I told her again. “I don’t care if-”
Her arms came around my neck, her lips silencing me, and I didn’t give a fuck about right or wrong, love or hate, our futures or our pasts.
I cared only that she was in my arms again.
I reached down and grabbed her thighs, hoisting those beauties up until they were wrapped around my waist. Kissing her like I was a man dying of starvation, I walked us back towards the center of the room until my legs hit the edge of the bed. Lowering Neve onto the mattress, I followed until my body was covering hers.
Reaching down, I grabbed the hem of her shirt and started lifting it up. I wanted her and I wanted her naked. I wanted to see what was mine. What belonged to me. What I fucking owned.
Because I did own her.
I owned every fucking inch of her.
Neve broke off the kiss and her hands reached for my shirt as well. Soon, we were a tangled mess of hands tearing off each other’s clothing. A week without her was a week too long. Hell, an hour without her was an hour too long. She was becoming the very air I breathed, and I knew that if it came down to it, I’d choose her. Fuck Astra and fuck Rýkr. All that mattered was this girl in my arms, naked or not.
Leaning down, I took one of those luscious tits in my mouth and sucked her sweet nipple until it pebbled in my mouth. My teeth nipped at the hardened bud, and Neve let out a deep moan, spreading her legs wider for me to fit in between them.
“Easton, please…”
I let go of her tit, so I could tell her, “I’ll give you anything you want, baby. Anything. I don’t care what it is.”
“I just want you,” she cried out, and I wanted to commit violence. I was feeling beyond violent at having been a dick all week long and denying myself this pleasure. She’d been denied to me all my life and I had sworn it would never happen again, but it had.
Because I was a fucking asshole.
“You’ve got me, baby,” I vowed. “You’ve got all of me.”
I jumped up off the bed and reached down to flip her over until she was on her hands and knees. Dropping low, I shoved my face in her pussy and reacquainted myself with the taste of her sweet cunt.
“Oh, God…Easton…”
“You like that, baby?” I panted between licks.
“You know I do,” she said whimpered.
“Yeah, I do,” I smirked against her wet flesh. “I know you love cumming on my face.”
“Chris
t…” she moaned, her hands fisting the bed comforter around her.
I pulled back and slid two fingers inside her pussy, stretching her for what was to come next. Even though I’d fucked her all night long Monday night, she was still unused to a point. I was still breaking in her pussy to accommodate my cock.
But that didn’t mean I couldn’t still play.
My tongue moved upward until it was teasing that tight, puckered ass of hers as I finger fucked the hell out of her hot, wet pussy. She stiffened at first, but soon, she was moaning in the worst way. Practically begging for it.
When I felt her cream start dripping down my hand, I pulled my fingers out before getting in position behind her and slamming my cock home. “Fuck,” I hissed. No way was I ever going to go days without this again. Without her again.
“Easton,” she cried out. “Oh, God…”
I grabbed her hips, my right hand smearing her juices all over her skin, then railed into her beautiful body. I slammed home every inch of cock because that’s what she did to me. I couldn’t kiss her long enough. I couldn’t touch her everywhere enough. I couldn’t hold her tight enough. I couldn’t fuck her deep enough. I couldn’t love her hard enough.
It. Was. Just. Never. Enough.
I fucked her until she came all over my cock and her pussy was squeezing me with her explosive convulsions. “Fuck yeah, baby,” I grunted. “Give it to me.”
“Harder,” she begged, and she had no fucking idea.
Pulling my soaked cock out of her pussy, I pulled her ass open, so I could see her body trembling and clenching with her orgasm. I was sick like that. I wanted to see it all. In fact, I had plans on recording us one day, so I could see all of her taking my cock. I wanted to see the expressions on her face, the flush on every inch of her skin, the way her pussy clenched with arousal. All of it. I wanted to watch all of it without the distraction of my own pleasure.
Feeding her my cock again, I slid a finger in her ass, and she responded like I knew she would. This wouldn’t be the first time I’ve played with her ass, and it wasn’t going to be the last. However, this was going to be the first time for both of us as I planned on sliding my cock inside her ass.
The Rýkr Duet Page 21