“Well at least something went right this weekend. Now if only James phones me and Adele gets over Ralph, we can all be happy.” Gigi couldn’t help giving a little sigh; she’s almost given up hope of hearing from James.
“Maybe, maybe not,” I murmured. “Now if you had said ‘Finn’…”
30th October 1967, early Monday morning, London
Adele woke up in the middle of the night and started to thrash round in bed.
“She’s feeling guilty,” Maude told us. “She isn’t the type to break up a happy family, but Ralph insisted his marriage was a sham.”
Her thoughts revolved in the darkness. Usually you can’t make them out, because so many people are thinking at the same time - everything gets mixed up and confused. Thoughts appear hazier than dreams, as if the images are covered with a veil. Adele’s flickered in a swirl of dark grey and maroon.
“This isn't doing her any good,” Leilani whispered, “getting herself depressed. She’s got to let go of the past and think about the future.” She hauled a couple of the scent bottles out of her bag and lobbed them over to Maude. “Try these.”
“She’s awake,” Maude objected. “She’s usually been asleep when we’ve done this before. The coffee in the park might have come from the cafe. Won’t she be suspicious if the room starts smelling of curry?”
“She’ll think one of the others had an Indian takeaway for supper.”
So Maude uncorked the bottles and wafted the scents towards Adele. Slowly the colour of her thoughts began to change.
“The smell’s working,” I cried, “the images are becoming lighter.”
A streamer of yellow made its way through the gloom. We held our breath as Adele’s patterns changed. Regrets for her lost happiness were no longer in the forefront of her mind. Ralph would always be dear to her, but, without him, she could do things she couldn’t do now. She began to imagine another future.
“I'd like to go round the world and see everything. I need some cash to get started, then I can work my way from country to country. When I want to move on, I’ll earn the fare.”
“Wonderful, she’s thinking about money now.”
“How much has she got?”
“Not a lot. When she goes out with Ralph, she always pays for herself and he likes expensive meals. She won’t need to do that any more; she can save if she wants to.”
“Look, she is!” I pointed to the piles of money, which had drifted into the room. The picture changed. “Oh no, she’s back to Ralph again.”
“She’s thinking how to break up with him.”
Adele was considering ways and means. She dismissed the idea of writing him a letter as too cowardly. She owed him more than a sheet of paper. She’d tell him face to face and he wouldn’t be pleased. What reason could she give for breaking up with him? She didn’t want to say she had seen him with his family. He might think she had been spying and she hadn't, even though she had been sorely tempted to do so. He'd never believe the meeting in the park was an accident. What would he believe? He wouldn’t accept she had scruples. She’d known he was a married man.
With Ralph she had no future and she wanted one. Happiness with Ralph was tainted by guilt. He was likely to replace her soon enough. There were plenty of young girls around. She stopped for a moment and then she carried on with her train of thought.
Someone else! Ralph would believe her if she told him she had met another man. At the beginning, he had been jealous because she was so much younger. His jealousy faded as she seemed content to stay with him, yet he had never quite forgotten those early days. Yes, she would lie to Ralph. His reaction would be unpleasant, but she had dealt with worse. She wanted the affair to end quickly for both their sakes. She didn’t like lying, but this lie was a kind one. She’d tell him and she’d be free. Then she’d start saving every penny. She’d get brochures to find out about the places she wanted to go. She’d go round the world, starting with India. Adele made her decisions, rolled over and went back to sleep again.
“Phew! Let’s hope she has the courage to do everything she’s decided to do.”
“She does, believe in her.”
“Ralph’s been known to talk her out of things before.”
“You’ll make sure he doesn’t do so this time. If anyone can, you can.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”
I do hope I’m right. Adele deserves to be happy and a lot of people on the sub-continent need her.
2nd November 1967, Thursday, London.
Finn’s studying hard at the moment, so he hasn’t seen Gigi for a week. He found a cream for her fingers, though, and he tore himself away from his books long enough to give it to her.
“He’s gone to a lot of trouble,” Thelma told me. “He’s harried the dermatology people, ever since he found out about Gigi’s hands. They only gave him this cream to get rid of him. It’s still experimental, but it ought to work. He doesn’t want her to go home. He’s definitely interested in her; he’s even got her picture by his bed.”
“I bet he has pictures of all his girlfriends.”
Thelma smiled. “He keeps the others in a drawer. He’s never put one of them in a frame before.”
“So you think he’s serious about her?”
“He’s beginning to be.”
“Good. Let’s hope James doesn’t phone and she falls for Finn.” I crossed my fingers.
Finn handed Gigi the tube of cream. “This is the latest thing. Use it sparingly, in case you get a bad reaction. Stop at once if you do and ring me up. I’ve also got these for you.”
Gigi took the pair of rubber gloves reluctantly. “I can’t wear these. My fingers don’t move properly in them and they make me itch even worse than I do already.”
“These are special. They're thin, so a surgeon can feel what he’s doing. They are made of special rubber which shouldn't irritate you. If they work, I’ll get you some more. Why not try them?”
“I suppose I could,” she muttered. Then she realised how ungrateful she sounded after all the trouble he had taken. “Thanks a lot. You were good to remember. I'll try the cream and wear the gloves and I’ll tell you what happens.”
“Ring me. The friend who gave them to me wants a full report.”
“I will.”
They didn’t stay together long, because Finn is serious about his work. He doesn’t want to resit any of his final exams. He needs to finish his course, qualify and go home next August. Thelma told me he can’t afford to fail. He hasn’t got much money and his uncle isn't well. On the other hand, once he leaves London, he’s unlikely to see Gigi again, which is making him confused. He’s started wondering if he should stay here, in case things work out with her. He can’t bring a girl home with him, unless they are going to be married. Gigi might not want to come with him and he daren't ask her yet.
“Confused is good,” Thelma observed. “Everyone should have a little confusion in their lives. He’ll work things out and I don’t think it will take him a long time, but Gigi needs much longer.”
“I hope she does work it out in the end.”
“Most people do - given the right encouragement – and that’s what Guardians were invented for.”
5th November 1967, Sunday,
Bonfire Night, London.
Unfortunately James phoned this morning - snarl! He said he meant to ring a few days ago, but he was too ill. Gigi was quite cool to him when she answered. After she heard this, though, she became full of concern. I couldn’t help wondering whether his illness was a convenient one. Perhaps I’m just being nasty. James told her he’d got her letter. He wanted them to forget everything and start afresh. Naturally she agreed. Then he asked her out tomorrow night.
They are going to ‘The Graduate’ again. James wants to see it and Gigi didn’t tell him she’s been before. She hasn’t mentioned Finn and she doesn’t intend to. She’s never told Finn about the quarrel with James either, so I suppose it’s fair enough. I don’t think I
could go out with two people at once, but maybe Gigi will manage things better. She’s missed James, unfortunately, in spite of seeing Finn. You can sense her relief. All her anxiety and depression have disappeared and she’s acting the way she did when I first met her.
The girls went to the bonfire in Hyde Park tonight. Magnificent fireworks - lots of fountains and rockets and bangers and even some fireworks that have since been banned, called Rick-Racks. They bang and jump, bang and jump. No one knows where they will land next. They’re awfully dangerous, so I'm not surprised they’re illegal now. I couldn’t help laughing as people jumped when one landed under their feet. You can understand why they were so popular.
Tommy came too. Adele and Gigi met him for the first time and they liked him a lot. He’s a little taller than Jane, with dark hair and eyes. He’s rather quiet, but he has a quirky sense of humour. Jane blossomed in his company, though the life and soul of the party was Gigi, who kept everybody laughing. I like seeing her so happy again even for all the wrong reasons, from my point of view at least.
6th November 1967, Monday, London.
In spite of kissing most of the way through ‘The Graduate’, Gigi managed to watch the last scene more closely. Fortunately, James keeps his eyes closed when he kisses, so she turned her head and peeked out of one eye. She ended up with a crick in her neck, but the uncomfortable position worked. She tried to see the wedding through Finn’s eyes and realised how funny it was. She imagined her mother as Mrs. Robinson and almost gave the game away by giggling. She only just stopped herself in time.
I sat beside Ivan. He didn’t take my hand or say much to me, only polite nothings. I can’t let that state of affairs go on - I’ll have to do something when we’re on our own. Afterwards, Gigi and James went back to his bedsit and Ivan and I were alone at last. I felt awkward, but I forced myself to apologise and ask him if we could be friends again. Thelma proved to be right. Ivan definitely does not hold grudges. Before long we were back where we had been and we spent the rest of the evening on his Turkish bed. I didn’t realise how much I had missed him.
When we eventually had time for other things, I asked Ivan why James had taken so long to phone Gigi. “What’s going on? What makes him run his love life in such a strange way?”
“I shouldn’t tell you.” Ivan sighed. “Some things are confidential.”
“Confidentiality is a good thing, but only up to a point. Aren’t you and I supposed to be helping each other out?”
“We must put our own client’s interests first.”
“I’m not disputing the fact. I wouldn’t harm James, but I won’t let him hurt Gigi any more than is necessary. My brief is to keep them from marrying, so I must make them break up eventually. You don’t want them to stay together?”
“No. Go on then, what do you want to know?”
“Why did he take so long to phone her?”
“He was telling her the truth. He did have a cold of sorts, but he didn’t stay off work and it was only one of his reasons.”
“And the other one is?” I prompted.
“It's to do with why he goes out of London at the weekends.”
“Good Lord, this is like getting blood out of a stone. Where does he go, for Heaven’s sake?”
“To meet Arabella.”
“Who is Arabella?”
“His girlfriend.”
“I thought so!”
“Gigi’s one of three. Susie's another, but Arabella is the one who is most important to him.”
“Why?”
“She’s got money, she belongs to his ‘set’ and he’s known her all his life. She’s at university in Oxford. When she comes down next year, he’s going to marry her.”
“Why don’t they get married now?”
“She's finishing her course. Her parents would object if she doesn’t. Anyway, I can’t imagine a girl like Arabella making do in a bedsit. They couldn't afford anything better on the money James is earning right now. He hopes to be promoted soon and sent abroad, where their living expenses will be paid for. He'll have a feather in his cap if that happens, because he’s rather young for such a step. I'm not going to tell you any more. The rest is confidential. Let me just say this - a promotion would convince Arabella’s parents he’s good enough for their daughter. It’s important that he marries her in the end.”
“In the meanwhile he’s playing around with Gigi and Susie.” I made no attempt to keep the indignation out of my voice. I hate people who make use of others.
“Why shouldn’t he?” Ivan obviously doesn’t think the way as I do, because he looked surprised. “He’s stuck in London all week and Arabella’s up in Oxford. He likes Gigi and Susie and sex. They have a good time and no harm done. No one is married or engaged. The girls could say ‘no’, if they didn’t want to be with him; he’s not forcing them. Why not go with them and enjoy himself?”
“Because he’s using them. He doesn’t love Gigi or Susie, does he? They’re only…” I hesitated and he finished the sentence for me.
“...pleasant ways of passing the time. Yes, they’re his present, Arabella is his future. I don't think he is passionately in love with anyone.”
“Except himself. Does Arabella know about the others?”
“He’s not that stupid. Arabella doesn't tell him her secrets either. She has a couple of casual boyfriends on the go as well.”
“Complicated.”
“Very.”
“Gigi loves him and thinks he’s falling in love with her.”
“More fool her. She’s a pretty little thing, but she’s young - she’ll learn.”
“What on Earth do I do now?”
Ivan threw up his hands into the air in exasperation. “Nothing. That’s why I wasn’t keen on telling you in the first place. I knew you’d want to do something and spoil the whole thing. Everything’s going along nicely at the moment, so let them get on with it. Gigi’s got another boyfriend herself, hasn’t she?”
“A friend, not a boyfriend.”
“Friends, boyfriends, what’s the difference? This affair goes on a bit longer, according to the schedule. If I were you, I’d encourage Gigi to keep going out with the other chap. So, when she does get dumped, she can turn to him.”
“You insensitive man!” I said, but I was careful to say the words with a smile. I didn’t want another quarrel and neither did Ivan.
He only grinned. “I am, aren’t I? I don’t believe in dying of a broken heart. In my experience, most people don’t stay with their first love and they survive. I did, you did, Gigi will too. She’s tougher underneath than you give her credit for. You’ll find out.”
“I suppose so.” I felt miserable and it took me a while to respond, when Ivan’s arm slid around my waist.
He murmured, “Now to more important things. I wouldn’t like you to think I am insensitive about you.”
7th November 1967, Tuesday, London.
Gigi came home this evening to find Jane in high spirits.
“What’s happened?” she asked.
“Uncle Hugh’s come up trumps.” Jane had an ear to ear grin. “He saw my parents yesterday and they had what he called a ‘full and frank discussion’. He thinks he may have persuaded them to talk to us, at least. Cross your fingers he has.”
“They’re crossed so hard I won’t be able to do a thing with them, but it’s for a good cause.”
Jane laughed and gave her a hug. “I’m off to Tommy’s now and at least I can enjoy the weekend for once.”
“Where’s Jane going?” Adele asked as she came into the room. “She was in a hurry so we didn’t talk, but she looked excited.” Gigi told her the story.
“Well done, Uncle Hugh.” Adele sat down on the bed with a tired sigh.
“You sound awful. Did you sleep last night?”
“It’s not that. I did overtime after a full day at work, so I’m whacked.”
“When did you get back?” Gigi said.
“About nine. You were out. With
James I presume?”
Gigi nodded. “Yes. Things seem to be okay between us now. Unfortunately, he’s going away as usual this weekend. I wish he didn’t go so often. I’d love to spend Sunday with him when we'd have the full day together.” She sounded wistful, but she giggled when Adele said,
“You’d be sore.”
“Why does he go away every weekend?” Adele was thinking things over.
“He says he has friends he’s always visited. Also his mother isn’t terribly well, so he goes home sometimes.”
“He never asks you to come with him, does he?”
“No, he doesn’t.”
“I’m a cynic, but you know, Gigi, if I were you, I’d wonder about where he is and what he does.”
“You’re being horrible.”
“I’m not. I’ve been caught. Someone, who loves you, wants to be with you, unless there’s a good reason not to be. I accept that he needs to visit his mother when she’s ill, but not these others. Why should his old friends be more important than you? Perhaps he is telling you the truth; I hope he is. I wonder, that’s all.”
A cold shiver ran up Gigi’s back and she hurried to change the subject. “Talking about the truth, have you spoken to Ralph yet?” she retorted.
“I’m still getting up the courage to face him. He’s not going to be pleased, especially when I say I’m leaving him for someone else.”
“Why lie to him?”
“Another man is the one reason he will believe. If I tell him I’m going because he’s happily married, he’ll try to talk me out of it. I don’t fancy him pestering me. I want a clean break.”
Ghost Diaries 1_Gigi's Guardian_Paranormal Romance Page 16